Midnight City's Top Reporter
@eclecticJournalist
Getting all the inside scoop and such!
Midnight City Update: Hysterical Dame nice to me. Photographer has good taste in women. Give her a raise. I don't remember if that's my job or not
Midnight City Update: everyone is so mean to me
let's put all the city's money into filling the potholes with oobleck because i don't give a fuck anymore
what if i just lived in the potholes
pꙮthꙮles are free. yꙮu gꙮtta get that bag 💰💰💰 - The Non-Mystical Regular Guy Man
the potholes are so deep i could hide a body in them
someone get photographer on the line tell her we need her big lebians ass over here to help me because newsflash: THE POTHOLES WEREN';T FIXED
Guys i think i just hit someone with my sad excuse for a car. it's a really sad car. i don';t even know what model it is i know nothing about cars
...When you need to locate your car, do you simply look for the most ramshackle jalopy in the general vicinity, put your key in the ignition, and hope it works?
yeah kind of. if it doesn't work i just kick the steering wheel in
I can imagine anything.
I drank some of that brightly coloured stuff in Pickle Inspector's kline bottle. I couldn't get the liquid out so i smashed it on the ground and began suckling from the puddle like a dog.
Midnight City Update: I am going to hit the next child i see with my car i am so fucking mad and drunk right now i dont give a FUCK
Midnight City Update: Spades Slick spotted in gay bar? Fork spotted in kitchen!
sorry forgot to say MIDNIGHT CITY UPDATE i'm pissed off and my ass is wet
guys i fell in a puddle and now my ass is wet i hate this fucking city
I can do it too! Photographer likes girls!
Gee, who could have guessed?
... Bit of a fork in silverware drawer situation there EC.
Having a best friend is nice but sometimes she'll be a little...blunt.
Because it's silly ! She told people I like men, okay? I am now realizing I might be overreacting. This wasn't much of a secret.
TH4T 1S TH3 MOST MUND4N3 S3CR3T 1 H4V3 3V3R H34RD 1 W4S K1ND OF HOP1NG FOR SOM3TH1NG MOR3 1NT3R3ST1NG
DO NOT PISS IN THE POTHOLES THAT DOES NOT FIX THEM!!!
၄⋆၃ why would anyone think that pissing in the potholes would help question mark
I don't know I saw a guy out in the street pissing in a pothole and then when I looked at him horrified he smiled and gave me a thumbs up as though he was helping.
၄⋆၃ im horrified in publix question mark whipping it out in publix to piss in the pothole question mark
Midnight City Update: Fix the potholes #fixthepotholes
Timid Photographer says to just take the roads that don't have potholes but those are very few and far between and if I did take them I would be late everywhere and I'd get lost!!!
I will do an article on the potholes. I'm so tired of them. I keep trying to ride my bike and then my bike goes in the potholes and I fall off my bike.