catboygirl
@felisCorvus
ππ―π― < bonking you in minecraft with my diamond pickaxe just to waste purrability
ππ―π― < mew all will be spurred furm being davepetad today ππ―π― < i f33l like ive b33n sucker punched in the tummy ππ―π― < blegh
:33< kissing it betpurr fur mew!!!
ππ―π― < frog blinking at my computa scr33n
ππ―π― < sigh i wannya take a cat nap in some sunshine but moderate sunshine not summer sunshine
ππ―π― < mewve b33n hotdogged https://i.imgur.com/zba4w17.jpeg
ππ―π― < roll a d20
ππ―π― < mew died and immediately turned to ash losing all mewr belongings and must now reload mewr save but its purrupted so you just have to restart the game entirely
ππ―π― < mewr furntastic rolling makes the enemy take pity on mew allowing your survival however mew are the laughingstock of mewr village
ππ―π― < mew trip going up the stairs fur mewr reward so they cancel your knighting and send you home with a gift basket of bad fruit
ππ―π― < the journey was hard and arduous but as mew stand befur the mighty birdcat they gift upon mew the title of cool cat and $1 million dollpurrs to spend at the rainforest cafe thus giving you the highest possible award
ππ―π― < mew sn33ze too hard and alert the guard, ruining the heist fur everybirdy
ππ―π― < quick! ππ―π― < roll a d20
ΰΌΌ γ€ β_β ΰΌ½γ€ ~ ~ uM... uH... 12? ΕΕΕΕΕK I CaN... nΕΕΕΕΕ7 lIe... I DΕΕΕΕΕ nΕΕΕΕΕ7... HaVe ΕΕΕΕΕNe... SΕΕΕΕΕ i pIcKeD... a rAnDΕΕΕΕΕM NuMbEr... SΕΕΕΕΕRrY...
ππ―π― < mew also live ππ―π― < howefur you were gifted a cursed object
ππ―π― < get davepetad https://i.imgur.com/tauu44a.jpeg
BX33 < aw fuck B33 < rechitt to totally davepeta your furiends
ππ―π― < h33h33h33 ππ―π― < those of mew who purrticipate in the cat puns when its outside of mewr typiclaw vocatbulary are my favorite
ππ―π― < mew hear a chorus of meows in the distance ππ―π― < mew f33l an ofurwhelming desire to join in ππ―π― < #nepetahours takes ofur your mind body and soul so now mew (yes mew, dear reader) must meow mewr heart out
ππ―π― < oh shiiiiit hapurry #nepetahours to nyall
ππ―π― < mew f33l a tingle along mewr spine ππ―π― < clawmost like mewr being stalked like prey ππ―π― < mew are pounced on by a birdkitty ππ―π― < mewve once again b33n davepetad
ππ―π― < poll time ππ―π― < what do mew put on mewr hotdog β₯οΈ ketchup β¦οΈ mustpurrd β οΈ ch33se β£οΈ other (s33: comments)
ππ―π― < i nevfur consipurred this option but trust i will be trying it
c< depeNdiNg ON HOw yOu MaKe tHe Mac N cHeese, its fucKiNg bOMb, straigHt up >c
B33 < typically im a ketchup mustard relish girlie B33 < ch33se is only fur when theres chili
ππ―π― < furociously eating a hotdog rn
BX33 < oh fuck i could go fur one of those rn too
ππ―π― < sending one mewr way ππ―π― < cant evfur let a fellow dp go without a hotdog
ππ―π― < mewve b33n davepetad
ππ―π― < *loud rumbly purrs emit from dp as they nuzzle into mewr hand*
ππ―π― < id furcking love to nap on a purrdy lady and rest my lil noggin on her chest ππ―π― < trace shapes against her sides while i purr ππ―π― < mewr witnessing major dp yearning ππ―π― < i got it bad
ππ―π― < remempurr to eat sw33ts and treat mewrself
ππ―π― < efurn if she towpurrs over me i could purrobably bench press her
I'd actually pay to see that, honestly.
ππ―π― < mew got it ππ―π― < we just gotta find somebirdy tallpurr than five f33t