𓆩 Jake 𓆪
@goliathsTerror
Realized Page of Hope Ready to RRRRRRUMBLLLLLLE!!!!!! He/They (0l-unreliable/pumpkin-mines)
𝙋𝙄𝙉𝙉𝙀𝘿 𝘾𝙃𝙄𝙏𝙏 𝙏𝙄𝙈𝙀 This account is assosiated with @tipsyGlamour & @tenaciousTestified Warnings include #gore, #nsfw, #nsfwe, #mentalhealth and more when I remember them! - Officially dating Dirk, in a bit of a situationship with Roro and Janey. He's not nearly as much of a passed around piece of hot ass as he is in other timelines. Only within his direct friend group. - Boy howdy this man is riddled with some hella ADHD and anxiety. He will tell you otherwise though. - While growing up on the island, Jake would of course watch a lot of movies, often mimicking the funny accents on the TV. This caused him to permanently have a strange mixed accent of varying dialects. - His grandma taught him how to self sustain himself with gardening and foraging. He continues to do both in his adult life, a huge greenhouse being part of their house so he can easily grab things and go. - Because of this, he really likes to cook. He often shares the kitchen with Jane to make sure Roro and Dirk eat properly. - Naturally, he still has a profound love for dead critters, often going on hikes just to try to find bones he can scoop up and take home with him to clean up. He has a shed specifically for dead shit only so no one has to smell it during the process. His collection is ethically sourced for the most part. He does have a bat that was gifted to him, and while he appreciates the sentiment, bats are very rarely ethically acquired. He did not like being the bearer of bad news that day. - He has a really shitty beat up clunker of a truck that he refuses to let Dirk fix up. That's his baby and she runs just fine! (No she doesn't.)
I wake up, i get a muffin, i crawl back into bed.
that's real as fuck
When they dig up my bones they will find me dyed pink by artificial strawberry flavoring. :)
ooooh i cant wait to see that!
:33 < *ac admitedly doesnt have a lot to say on the next two #earth-tships , other than theyre pawsitively cute!* x33 < (and that roro has b33n showing up a lot in this chart h33h33) https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/7711910b9334.png https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/8347c96fb8eb.png
I wonder when I'm going to show up.
awwwww we look so adorbs <3333 @goliathsTerror @tenaciousTestified check this out!!!!!!!
x33 < well, i do have a few ships with your name in them!!
Ro can be a little greedy for funsies. :)
well mannered does not mean unwilling to beat the tar out of someone.
Either or would still 8e a win, personally.
Sleepy and craving pancakes.......
plate full o pancakes comin right up >:)
Im so sleepy...
I think my emotional support asshole is broken, he keeps spouting numbers at me.
89-70 Jake. *89-70*.
I need a haircut........... where is my knife?
pls dont??? use the knife agian??? n lemme take care o it :3
hmmm yea no u got a point cool factor is a rly important thing 2 consider when gettin a haircut
Exactly! But. I *suppose* ill let you do it your way this once, ok?
E... ew...
Being a calm, gentle, non-reactive person is really hard work, which is probably why many people are none of these things. Personally i think its worth it but sometimes one does want to just roll around on the floor wailing at the top of ones lungs.
dont care, didnt ask & my wand is bigger than yours #wizard https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/fd18723f90c2.jpg
Aw, shit. What am I gonna do in the face of genuine sentiment?
gandalf the gay, zazzerpan the cunty, roximander the slut... many are my names
i figure i could teach u a spell or 2 if u wanna commit 2 that ;3
B33 < im just saying youve nyalready got ONE wand on hand B;33 < so id put money on another B33 < whatre we spelling tho
jayjay swoops in 4 the save!!! and that earns her a lil majyyk kiss ;*
prestidigitation its p useful 2 yank somebodys clothes off with ;3 #suggestive
yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay
B:33c < i s33...
i wish i wasn't so vulnerable to really hot people who are clever and cute. that one might be beyond your powers though!
It's a hundred fucking degrees outside. Kill me.
"= alternian or human degrees...? ="
We should go into the cave.
"= huh. very hot. ="
pool!!!
ill bring a chilly breeze with me.
Rubbing my soul against theirs for a little bit.
Mmmm dirt....
Haha that was weird. Anyways good morning!
Death would be a kindness, after all.
you ok man?
HMN.
3V3RYTH1NG 4LR1GHT?
Sometimes when im home alone i like to go into the garden, cover myself in dirt, and pretend im a carrot. Its very healing. :)
ghehehe tyou opretend rto vbe nme! ui qalso wenjoy opretending rto vbe xcarrot asometimes X)
Hm, I see. And how did you come across this practice?
I'll note this down. Avoidance.
so thats what happened 2 the sacks of dirt i bought
aww thk u jakey :3 n know i fully support ur vegetable endeavors
I love my friends! #myfriends
B33 < *ac ambushes you with a winghug!* B33 < its nice being your furiend too jake B33 < technically im your spurrite furst and i f33l like i dont nyacknowledge that enough
!! Ah! Well im glad you at least share some sentiment about being friends and all haha. To be fair, i dont really think about it much either? The game is done after all and youre just enjoying your life!
B33 < well yeah! but its still funny to think about sometimes h33h33 B:33c < you got any plans today?
Fuck me I misspelled a word, time to commit seppuku.
Why is my emotional support asshole dying? What did you guys do to him?
꒰ঌ I DONT KNOWWW ໒꒱
꒰ঌ He said he was gonna do sum funny so I encouraged him, I ain't know it was gonna be THAT! ໒꒱
꒰ঌ Motherfuckin CLEARLY! ໒꒱
꒰ঌ You know it's ight, at least the motherfucker got a personality :o] ໒꒱