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Chakwa Nanich

Beforian
Those who came before us.
genderfluid
Stay hydrated!

@integrityManifesto

owner pi editor pi writer of alta 'mayka munk-kəmtəks, the only independent beforan source of true journalism. chakwa nanich uses any "pronouns" and "gender" but only one name. ɬax̣ayam!

Blood: BronzeKult Score: 437Kull Score: 2637 followers6 following
IM
Beforian
Those who came before us.
genderfluid
Stay hydrated!
@integrityManifesto[IM]

|| ► what time is it? soon-to-beforian understandings of the trollian sweep. || an article on beforus-based calendar understanding and execution of chronology by accredited author chakwa nanich, localized into 4 separate trollian dialects and 1 non-trollian dialect for ease-of-reading. questions? comments? generalized fears about upcoming elections to caste-representative positions in government? chakwa nanich can be reached using @integrityManifesto on chittr. → article begins. in branching out across platforms, it has come to my attention that! non-trollian species might struggle to understand the timekeeping practices of a beforian journalist. since journalism itself is about sharing information in the most understandable and blunt way, i can't exactly leave a newfound audience out to dry. so. despite my great efforts to avoid the inevitable, i will now embrace the mantle of proper schoolfeeder to the unabsorbed. should make things easier when you are all eventually subsumed into the beforian domain, putting you at least two sheds above the average cull-captive. let's hop to it! beforus rotates on two axes, the polar axis and the lunar axis. the polar axis runs through our largest oceans, specifically the deepest trenches of those oceans! similar to the "human" concept of "north and south" poles from my extensive research. the lunar axis is a variable point, so just think of it as "perpendicular" to our lovely pink moon and our solar system's resident star. analogous to the "human" concept of "north and south" poles... again. wik-kəmtəks? most wrigglers are! don't worry... i have a feedecree in communication. time to approach it another way. beforus orbits the resident star on its lunar axis, meaning the moon and the sun are on the same "plane" in space at all times. however, the planet SPINS on its polar axis, and our equator is never parallel with our moon because the MOON orbits over the polar axis. 'dret wik-kəmtəks ixt. {i have included a helpful diagram below to clarify things a little further, in case my readers are visual feeders.} moving on... a perigee is the time it takes our pink moon to reach one pole from the other, or one full night and light together, with the apogee being the midpoint or change-over from light to night... or night to light depending on your location! sort of similar to chaku-san or chaku-mun for the diurnal "human" species that seems most dominant of non-trollian chittr users. the moon orbits us 13 full times over the course of an equinox. 26 perigees {or 26 apogees if you're weird} make just 1 equinox {about 1 rotation of the planet} and it takes around 26 equinoxes to orbit the resident star. wow! it sure is nice to have everything perfectly match like that, huh? ...fun fact for the curious... beforus actually has several "eves" that are "not-really-nights" in our calendars, or night / light cycles that get "skipped" from counting because we like our 26-26-26 set-up sooo much. you might have heard of 12th perigee's eve before! that's just one of our "skipping" perigees, showing up every equinox or so to pad out those pesky "almost" and "abouts" in beforan timekeeping. hatching on an eve is considered very unlucky in some parts of beforus, so do your best to chew out at a good time like just before or after a season. a season? right! beforus has four seasons, known as dim / dusk / dawn / doom. these are governed by our orbit around the resident star. doom and dusk are opposites, just like dim and dawn, existing on opposite sides of beforus at any given time. unlike non-trollian seasons on boring 1-axis planets like "earth" or similar, our seasons refer to the position of the star's light on beforus at any given time during a sweep. the side of beforus that faces the resident star is in the doom season, the side facing away from the resident star is in the dusk season! meanwhile, the dawn season is the "edge" of the doom-dusk seasons "turning" into the sunlight and the dim season is the doom-dusk "edge" now "turning" away from the sunlight. {i'll include a diagram for this as well. my gift to visual feeders.} doom seasons are hot, dusk seasons are cold, and dim / dawn seasons are just the best! thankfully, the worst of doom and dusk seasons take place over the deep oceans, warming our and cooling our waters in a way that keeps the whole of beforus very livable for even the lowliest of landdwellers. when our equator faces the resident star, our natural rotation keeps the topography from being utterly eradicated by husk-blistering radiation and heat... but don't go wandering during the light apogee. seriously! i'm warning you against that. phew! looks like we've covered all the basics, even if it gets even more complicated down to the smallest click. trolls are pretty set in our ways. we like everything working out in sort-of-tridecimals more than anything else, so even our perigees are broken up into 26: 13 scrubs before apogee then 13 scrubs after. as for a scrub, that's 26 swabs, and finally 52... clicks to a swab. {no system's perfect, i suppose.} consider it a system relying on 12... + 1, just in case. thank you for taking the time to feed up on basic beforian timekeeping with me, dear reader. hopefully these details have scuttled to the deepest reaches of your pan-equivalent... and if you're a troll who didn't know any of this stuff. well, now you do! if you enjoyed my ramblings, you might think to subscribe to my chittr profile, but. only do that if you're prepared for some hard hitting REAL journalism tackling the weird and wacky and wonderful problems on beforus. yes, i said PROBLEMS. no system is ideal until there's nothing left to critique, so keep your bulbs open and your tubes clean. if you dare! → article concludes. this is chakwa nanich, alta nayka ɬatu on the 12th lunar perigee of the 8th doom season's equinox. ɬax̣ayam! mirrored articles on swattpad, recoupjournal, huskbook, and panshock monthly. originally posted on the official alta 'mayka munk-kəmtəks website. — alta ɬaska chaku-sax̣ali, ɬaska 'təmtəm ɬatwa ɬatwa ɬatwa kʰanu-qʰata.

Kult: +222
Kull: +105
Total: 327
Ratio: 2.11

kongar! kongar! kongar! kongar! kongar! kongar! kongar! kooongar!!!!!!! Ი︵𐑼݁ Ი𐑼⋆Ი⑅𐑼 Ი𐑼 Ი𐑼⋆Ი⑅𐑼 Ი︵𐑼݁ Ი⑅𐑼 Ი︵𐑼݁ Ი𐑼⋆Ი⑅𐑼 Ი𐑼 Ი𐑼⋆Ი⑅𐑼 Ი︵𐑼݁ Ი⑅𐑼 an entire crowd of chakwa nanich enthusiats are cheering your name specifically, because it is always such a pleasure to see you in my comments. hello, kongar! it has been a while, so thank you for reaching out and making sure i know how appreciated the work is. how's the shoulder holding up?! inquiring bunnies would like to know. ₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ — alta ɬaska chaku-sax̣ali, ɬaska 'təmtəm ɬatwa ɬatwa ɬatwa kʰanu-qʰata.

Kult: +7
Kull: +2
Total: 9
Ratio: 3.50

AH!!!! I see... HOO HOO HAH!! A fellow parser of the fine arts of WORDS and SCRIPTURES!!! You have done well to make friends with individuals of wise caliber I am proud of you my apprentice! @(・ェ・)@⊃━☆:・゚✧ EHEM!! If uhm, Chakwa witnesses this, I greet you! My name is Monkei and I am very excited to share knowledge with you and also to LEARN from you!! HOO HOO HAH! @(・ェ・)@⊃━☆:・゚✧

Kult: +12
Kull: +2
Total: 14
Ratio: 6.00

miss muckrake... it is an honor! ૮꒰˶  - ˕ -꒱ა though we operate in different fields of wordsmithing, i should make it clear that i am an avid reader of the beforan enquirer. your upcoming coverage of the fight night phenomenon haunts my lights. no pressure, of course, but know that i am beyond eager to sink my fangs into your perspective. and... thank you very much for sharing my article with your followers! mere text cannot describe the thankfulness in my pusher, so here: 。° ૮₍°´ᯅ`°₎ა °。 — alta ɬaska chaku-sax̣ali, ɬaska 'təmtəm ɬatwa ɬatwa ɬatwa kʰanu-qʰata.

Kult: +5
Total: 5
@abraCadaver[AC]

ɬush ɬush ɬush!!! your accent is perfectly reasonable given your less-than-living circumstances, miss wellen. i'm assuming you are east beforan, given your honorifics and name placement, so please let me know if you prefer -san suffixes. ݁ Ი𐑼⋆ it warms my thorax to know that kongar has taken the time to spread my ramblings beyond the veil. industrious! perhaps i am destined for an even greater audience when my husk finally fails me?! can't let all that importance go to my head. as for my dialect... that's exactly why i'm so blunt about my history. beforus, as you probably know, has a terrible problem. silencing the outer fringes of society, or quashing what came before... i just won't stand for it. jumping up to the plate is my reason for being, and if i have my way, perhaps full articles can be in my native dialect and still be understood...? 𐔌՞. .՞𐦯 — alta ɬaska chaku-sax̣ali, ɬaska 'təmtəm ɬatwa ɬatwa ɬatwa kʰanu-qʰata.

Kult: +10
Total: 10

ˇ ᕦ@(o・ェ・oˇ)@ᕤˇ♡ˇ ...THAT IS...AN AWFUL LOT OF FANS. YOU REALLY KNOW HOW TO FILL A ROOM. CHAKWA. CHAKWOW. HOO HOO HOT DAMN... @(。・へ・)@ ...!!! KONGAR'S SHOULDER!!! CANNOT. LET. DOWN. THE FANS. @(。・`へ´・)@ ...HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.... @(。ˇ・`へ´・)@ HHHHHHHHHHGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH. @(。・`⸟´・)@ HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHRGGRHGH. @(。・`ꇳ´・)@—̳͟͞͞3⁼³₌₃⁼³₌₃⁼³₌₃⁼³₌₃ 『 スクークム・ピー・ユー・ケー・ピー・ユー・ケー・パンチ』 - 【Sukūkumu pī yū kē pī yū kē panchi】 SKOOKUM PUK-PUK PUNCH!!!!!!!!! @(。◕`ꇳ´◕)@ —̳͟͞͞0 HHH..A.H....HA....HA.... @(。・。・)@ ...!!! ˗ˏˋ ✸ ˎˊ˗ @(。・ェ・)@ GOOD. GOOD AS EVER. ˗ˏˋ ঌ ˎˊ˗ @(。・0・)@ WE WILL HAVE TO KEEP IN TOUCH MORE!!!! CHAKWA!!!! I HAVE SO MUCH THAT HAS HAPPENED TO TELL YOU ABOUT!!!! PLUS. WE HAVE NOT SPARRED. IN SO LONG. TOO SPARING! NOT ENOUGH SPARRING! MY SHOULDER IS HEALED. BUT IT SHOULD BE RECOVERING!!! FROM THE IMPACT!!! OF A HIGHER THAN HIGHEST HIGH JUMPKICK!!!!

Kult: +5
Kull: +2
Total: 7
Ratio: 2.50

witnessing... ₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ a grand pleasure to meet a compawnion of kongar's! i am very talkative, but only about the things that i like. this is your one and only warning before entering companionship with the one and only chakwa nanich... ₍ᐢ. ༝ .ᐢ₎ still, we probably have much to learn from the other. here is to a long and cheerful closeness! — alta ɬaska chaku-sax̣ali, ɬaska 'təmtəm ɬatwa ɬatwa ɬatwa kʰanu-qʰata.

Kult: +10
Total: 10

HOO HOO HAH! Do not worry, as a wizard of the magic arts, all knowledge is good knowledge!! You may blab to me on the parchments as long as you desire!! @(・ェ・)@⊃━☆:・゚✧ Perhaps we could even invite you to our grand adventures? our many nights of intense bloons towers defense 6? Some Balatro? @(・ェ・)@⊃━☆:・゚✧ WE WILL BALL!!! MONKEY BALL!!! @(・ェ・)@⊃━☆:・゚✧

Kult: +10
Kull: +2
Total: 12
Ratio: 5.00

your invitation is just so thoughtful! do you have nothing but kindness in your pan?! it's putting this journalist to shame... hihihi! 𐔌՞꜆.  ̫.꜀՞𐦯 it would be an honor to join yourself and @apexAcerbate in a flurry of company-making activities. i'm shocked that the perilous trials of MONKEY BALL have fans even in this modern age... i suppose some trolls are gluttons for punishment? but ixt caveat. kongar is required to ice and rest that shoulder. i will not be responsible for chitin failure later in life. ma kəmtəks?! ૮₍ ˶˃ ⤙ ˂˶ ₎ა — alta ɬaska chaku-sax̣ali, ɬaska 'təmtəm ɬatwa ɬatwa ɬatwa kʰanu-qʰata.

Kult: +10
Total: 10

Fret not!! I shall cast a Panacea spell upon him so that he may recover quickly from his ailments, and also gently bonk him with my wand for being irresponsible with his physical health! @(・ェ・)@⊃━☆:・゚✧ And you flatter me soo HOO HOO HAH, a true wizard must find kindness in his heart, lest he be lead astray by the dark arts... I would not wish such a fate to any magic caster. @(・ェ・)@⊃━☆:・゚✧

Kult: +10
Kull: +2
Total: 12
Ratio: 5.00

you got any clue on how this compares to alternian timekeepin?