@karmaDagger — #cw-sexual-abuse
sometime's i lay in bed and im reminded that. the crashout and realization that wingdings is an evil piece of shit arent the only awful memorie's i have here. that. girl i met on pesterchum, while i was banned from chittr for a while, who i invited over cause i thought she was a friend and i was so desperate for contact. and she got me so drunk and high that she was able to make me genuinely think she was my older sister destiny. and she raped me. ... i cant get out of this mansion soon enough. its easier to bear with haru here but. yeah.
i dont know what time it is. or how long i was out. lost a lot of blood. haru healed me. man im a fucking idiot huh. maybe i should actually, idk, consider going on medication so i dont have these fuckin episodes? crazy thought. ive unblocked everyone. sorry for making people worry, for pushing people away, for generally just being mentally ill. human brains ugly i guess. or, well. im not human im just made of human parts, but you get the point. ...if im not gonna become my future self, i think that means i might be a doomed self now. not sure if that means ill die or not. my phones broken. kind o...Read more
nothing changed. because a karma is just a karma who does karma things. im not gonna follow the king in yellow. aside from the guy being a douchebag, thered just be no point. thats not a karma thing to do. its not part of my "story". not on the path im fated to follow. i was created by the demon eye. or. angel eye. whatever. to be its vessel. a copy of kris dreemurr, but fully customizable to whatever the angel picked! how fun. ...then discarded to earth. by some "burning lord" apparently. no idea what the fuck that means but im sure ill pick up the context as i go. i was abused by my family. r...Read more
i only have two exes one of thems my current moirail and the other was my older sister i think i perhap's shouldnt weigh in on this current topic
i hate knowing im not even a person. created by a bunch of peoples options to be a "vessel" for some evil fucking demon eyeball and then i guess thrown down to earth like 20-something year's ago where i experienced abuse first at the hands of my sister then at the hands of the people i fell in with after running away from home when i was i didnt ask to be created i dont want to be this fucking thing thats only purpose has been to serve host to some shitty fucking eye was me being sent to earth part of it how much did wdg know would happen have i been fucking groomed for this broken so that ill make...Read more
getting morning wood used to be fine but after being raped by someone i met on pesterchum it just feel's like my own body is violating me. i didnt ask for this boner. the fuck. but i dont even know why i feel that way. its far from the first time that kinda things happened to me and i didnt give so much of a shit back then maybe its cause i care about myself more now than when i was a kid idfk #cw-rape #cw-abuse #rape #rape-mention #cw-mental-health #cw-rape-mention #cw-sexual-abuse #vent
i think im gonna abstain from using pesterchum / trollian forever now that i have chittr access again. dont trust a mf you meet on there. i thought i made a friend, invited her over after wed been talking a few days, and she drugged and raped me. not fun.