Something they don't tell you about trauma is that after being traumatised enough times it starts to get really. Fucking. Annoying. Yes yes I'm shaking and terrified despite absolutely nothing happening, yes I'm reliving the same moment in my head, yes the thought of anyone even coming close to me is making me feel ill, yes my emotional processing feels stunted and everything is like pins and needles in my pan. Can we move on already? Do you mind? Get out. Get the fuck out of my head already. I've done this dance before and it's boring now. LEAVE.
it really i$ $u¢h bull$hit
It really fucking is. The man is dead, can the ghost of him in my head leave already? Its a pain.
you $hould be able to ju$t kill the brain gho$t too
I would love to kill the brain ghost. I want to kill the brain ghost. Fucking hell what I would not give to be able to open up my own pan, take those memories out, and step on them until there's nothing but a smear on the ground. ... That being said I am not opening offers for anyone to touch my mind, even for the sake of doing that. My mind is all I have that is truly my own.
it starts 8ecoming funny instead of terrifying and that's how you know it's so over
I fear I am past the funny stage. Here's hoping the funny stage returns because I would prefer it to the rage.
wish there was more i Could offer than kind words friend. y'Can 6eat this pale phantom Cus y'already 6eat the real thing. ^◡^
Thank you, Curree. The words do more than you realise, so don't worry. I would not have made it this far in life without support, after all. And I have plenty more life in me.
yeah no i'm ju$t realizing "$hould" in that $enten¢e ¢ould al$o read like. "oh yeah that'$ po$$ible a¢tually, you haven't heard?" but like. no i ju$t mean you per$onally $hould be allowed to kill it with your brain hand$.
It is possible, in a sense. There are many ways to erase a memory. Hahaha. No no, I am mostly joking. I knew exactly what you meant. I also wish I could just kill it with my brain hands. Thank you.