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@pragmaticCoordinator
Third in command. I'm a busy man.
Here's your reminder that Scratch should die and burn and be erased from existence and also die.
We're lucky sons of guns to have Stitch to patch us up, obviously. Saved me from being offed countless times. But god fuckin damn, something about getting shot in the gut one day and havin' to keep chugging along the day after ain't right. #gore ?
Pity the poor fool who flirted so bad they's got the whole dashboard clowning on em now.
Sometimes one of the messes I find around this godforsaken manor has me wondering if it REALLY was one of those braindead hooligans, or one of the sharper ones who just really had a bone to pick. I mean, my crew's whole gig is orchestrating havoc, even if half of them don't know it. And sometimes these messes are a little TOO much of a pain in the ass for me not to get suspicious. You dig?
One time I had t'clean the entire kitchen 'cause Eggs n' Biscuits managed to somehow cheat the time it takes for yeast to grow and and let it grow near infinitely until they got muscled outta da place. Didn't trust anyone else to clean it though. It was quality yeast. Still use it t' this day to make some killer knishes.
Came home once to find an entire room was FULL of spider eggs. I don't mean just coatin' the walls or whateva, I mean the damned things flew out the door the moment I opened it. Die just about lit the manor on fire when he found out, and for once I couldn't blame him.
Fuck me, I'd join him.
Poor Stitch is tired of having to mend the scratches the cat leaves on suits when he's climbing up us like a damn tree, but all that frustration melts the moment he sees the little guy chasing after somethin'. Patient of a saint, that man.
Wait a minute.
Should'a seen it comin' that I'd stumble on another me eventually. I just joined yesterday.
There's a good heap of us on here. A good heap for The Felt, anyway. Seems like there's goddamn 10 of most of those human kids and trolls. Typical Paradox Space horseshit. You know how it is.
Yeah, I know how it is. Bullshit all the way down.
A real solid blow with a crowbar is a damn good solution to a lot of problems. More people should carry things like this around, honestly.
c< persONally, i carry a sHOvel 4 tHe saMe reasON >c
Where a hearty punch won't do the back of a gun or a trusty knife seems to work out just fine if ya ask me.
nbbnbgvvhfcccccccsdddvcgn mj,,.....l;l/;/;/////;/oppooiippp0998uuuu i iu i kjh ttttjyjjkkkkl../' ]]]
yeeeeah go kismet!
Man. This little bastard's lucky he's so goddamn cute. Sitting on my desk, on my papers, swatting at my pen when I write. Can't get anything done with this guy around.
Now I'm far from a puritan myself, but life would be a hell of a lot easier if these gentlemen could be so damn thoughtful as to at least keepin' the dancing to the ballroom. Or at the very least, I wouldn't have to deal with the mental image for the next fucking week. Christ. #nsfw
Some fellas just don't have a touch of class. Some people would go to places for dirty dancin' that I wouldn't go with a gun.
>> ડorry not ડure e¡ther of thoડe are an opt¡on, actua11y
What a time to come back. The hell'd I miss?
i could not possibly explain it to you.
Didn't miss anything too exciting while I was gone, I hope.
Right. I've had one hell of a day. Time to hit the sack.
The cat's coming with me, apparently. He doesn't give me much choice in the matter.
God *damn*, setting up cat trees is a pain in the ass. Maybe I shouldn't have gotten one so obscenely tall. The cat's probably gonna climb on everything else anyway.
Damn, I didn't expect the results to be so slanted. Finally heading back to the manor with all the stuff for Kismet. If I'm lucky, he might even actually use half of it.
i'm so good at names!!!!
Right. https://i.ibb.co/8DPxLz0h/Untitled.png What are we naming the cat? Putting it up to a vote, 'cause I think both suggestions are pretty good. Heart reacts for Oddball, diamond reacts for Kismet.
3833 < Kismet because when he gets an attitude he's a Hissmet. > 3833c
Kinda wish there were polls on this site now. Damn.
I believe some have used the react function for this purpose.
Yeah, I was considering it. I was thinking people might see it as cull score farming, but on second thought, I don't actually give a damn what those people think.
yeah, you just designate the buttons to the poll options. it's not worth overthinkin'.
Feed seems a bit more active now, so I'm once again asking for name suggestions. Little white kitten followed me home and I guess we have a cat now.
Yeah. I don't expect a lot of things with this cat to fit neatly in their assigned seats. I dunno much about cats, but what I do know is that they do as they goddamn please. Same as the bastards I'm sharing the mansion with. I gotta have somethin' to put on the papers, though.
What about Oddball?
3833 < I know LOADS about cats! Cats are pretty prone to having their favorite purrson and being very affectionate! > 3833 < Anyone that tries to say that cats don't love has never had a cat. > 3>8pp
I sure as hell figured out they love pretty fast. Little man followed me home, clung to my pant leg inside, and fell asleep in my lap all within 30 minutes of meeting the guy.
Hmm. That one's pretty good. Thematic, too. Guess it's between Kismet and Oddball.
3833 < Aww!!! He's already picked you out as his safe space! > 3833 < Cats won't sleep on just anyone, y'know? >
3833 < Make sure to have a lot of scratching posts around so he doesn't try the furniture. > 3833 < If he /does/ go at it, though, put a scratcher in front of the place he's scratching! >
Thanks for the advice. Guess I'll put another half dozen scratching posts in my cart before I saunter off.
Man, they really make cat beds in just about every shape, huh? They've got a whole wall of em.
oh my god can we have a paw one? can we?
Yeah, sure. I'm prolly gonna buy a handful of em anyway. I know at least half of the boys would flip their shit if they didn't get to have one in their room. Though I'm pretty sure cats have a reputation for sleeping pretty much anywhere else? I dunno. Never had a cat before.
Yeah, you must've missed that post, but I already got one. The damn thing is 7 feet tall and has 5 tiers. Figured we might as well make use of the obscene amount of space around here.
t' be fair you're postin' at itchy speeds, can y' blame me. also i'm gonna climb it. with the kitty.
I'm gonna get the biggest goddamn cat tree I can find. We have all this space and so much of it isn't used for jack. I suspect the little guy's prolly gonna climb on just about everything else, though.
Took me five minutes to get the cat to stop clinging to my suit so I could leave for the pet store. Adorable little bastard.
kitty secured and entertained. please make sure to get a laser pointer with the different light shapes it'll be so good.
Here's your reminder that Scratch should die and burn and be erased from existence and also die.