Another important and yet apparently controversial note... NO. MORE. FONDANT. You went to the effort of baking, layering, frosting and assembling a cake. WHY would you cover it with an unpalatable layer of rubbery elephant skin? Say it with me. "We will not add inedible toppings to our desserts." Obviously if you are toothpicking paper dinosaurs onto Little Jimmy's birthday cupcakes, that is a different story. But if I see another cake studded with molar-shattering "edible" pearls, I am going to lose my marbles. And you dizzy people are going to scoop them all up and feed them to a bunch of adolescents, because that is how low you have allowed your confectionery bar to droop. But this is mostly about the fondant. If I attend your function and you make me peel my slice of cake like a chimp with a banana, I am going home.
Ok.
Speaking Candidly I Would Say Youre Probably The Only Person I Would Ever Trust To Control Such A Substance
No because those stupid fucking pearls are a choking hazard.
iS FoNdAnT ThE GoLdEn cRuNcHy tHiNg tHaT ThE CaKe sItS On? YeAh tHaT BiTcH TaStEs tErRiBlE.
Oh good lord.
Waddle up to the podium and make your case, then. I will give you my open ears before I explain the ways in which you are mistaken!
It's yours.
YESSSS.