♠ hated by @charmingRebel
E⌁ERY DAY I'M NOT ASTONISHED, AND ACTUALLY PRETTY DAMN ⌁INDICATED, PUSHER⌁ARMED ACTUALLY, THAT THE GENERAL POPULACE E⌁EN ON HERE KNO⌁S HO⌁ TO E⌁ALUATE GOOD PEOPLE ⌁HEN THEY SEE EM. ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
@COLORFULCONNECTION ASKS: ʚ( BASIC QUESTI♡N, BUT D♡ Y♡U HA⌁E ANY H♡BBIES THAT Y♡U LIKE T♡ PARTAKE IN? )ɞ AL⌁AYS NICE SEEING SUCH A NICE FACE BEING SO CURIOUS ABOUT LITTLE OL ME, NOTHING BASIC ABOUT THAT AT ALL ZZ;) I'M A PRETTY BUSY GUY, BUT E⌁EN HEROES GOTTA MAKE ROOM FOR THAT SELF CARE SHIT IF JUST TO INSPIRE THE HOPEFUL MASSES, RIGHT? I COLLECT EARTH GUITARS, JUST GOT A HENDRIX OG LAST PERIGREE ACTUALLY. I ⌁ORK OUT, BUT NOT TOO MUCH, I JUST KINDA NATURALLY LOOK LIKE THIS. I LO⌁E THOSE STUPID LITTLE DESK TOY THINGS THAT YOU SQUEEZE OR POKE OR ⌁HATE⌁ER. AAAND I'⌁E BEEN REALLY GETTING INTO GOING TO AT LEAST ONE LOCAL CLUB ON ⌁HICHE⌁ER PLANET I'M DOING FIELD ⌁ORK IN IN BUSINESS TRIPS LATELY, SEE ⌁HAT THE LOCAL CUISINE IS LIKE, IF YOU CATCH MY DRIFT. THE FOOD IS USUALLY PRETTY GOOD, TOO. ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
HERE AT SATURN CORP, ⌁E LO⌁E A GOOD OL CHEEKY "RE⌁ERSE CASTEISM" ROMP ONCE IN A GREEN MOON. ⌁HY ELSE ⌁OULD RETRIBUTION NIGHTS ON THE SATURN NET⌁ORK BE SO FUCKING POPULAR? REAL CASES, REAL ⌁ICTIMS, REAL RESTORATI⌁E JUSTICE ⌁ITH ALL THE BLUE N UP SPLATTERFEST YOU COULD ASK FOR. BEST PART IS ⌁E KEEP IT ALL NONLETHAL ON CAMERA TO CATER TO THE MORE FAINT-PUSHERED--CMON, ⌁E'RE NOT TOTAL MONSTERS HERE. ANY⌁AY, STAY TUNED FOR THIS ⌁EEK'S EPISODE. ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
I DID AL⌁AYS HA⌁E A SOFT SPOT ⌁HEN IT COMES TO ZAPPING SHIT, I'LL GI⌁E YOU THAT. REALLY TIGHT RACE BET⌁EEN THAT AND AIRLOCKS IF I'M COMPLETELY HONEST. ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
HAHAHA, CUTE SHIT, BUT NO. ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
No, I'm just giving you your respect!
DID I DO SOMETHING TO YOU KID??? YOU PROJECTING SOME KINDA BOOHOO SOB STORY ONTO ME AND THAT'S ⌁HY YOU'RE CHE⌁ING ON THAT BONE E⌁ERY SINGLE TIME? AM I NOT GI⌁ING YOU ENOUGH ATTENTION??? ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
LET ME MAKE IT CRYSTAL CLEAR, DADDYO HOLDS THE LEASH. HE IS NOT ON ANYONE'S LEASH. IF ANYTHING HE HOLDS HIS O⌁N LEASH IN ONE HAND AND E⌁ERYONE ELSE'S LEASH IN THE OTHER. ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
ALRIGHT THAT'S ENOUGH A THAT. ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
NOTHING PERSONAL, KID. JUST, HAH, DON'T ⌁ANNA CONFUSE PEOPLE ⌁ITH THE COINKEYDINK OF A HORN SITUATION, AM I RIGHT? BESIDES, NO OFFENSE, BUT YOU LOOK YOUNG AS SHIT, KINDA HITS MORE AS SOME SOFT ⌁ILLO⌁Y INEXPERIENCED T⌁INK SHIT. EH...MAYBE THAT'S A THING FOR SOME PEOPLE??? SEAD⌁ELLER-T⌁INK-TURNED-RUST-RAG? MAYBE. YEESH. EITHER ⌁AY IT'S A NO-GO FOR BRAND RECOGNITION, THEMS THE BREAKS. ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
EHHHHHH. O⌁ERPO⌁ERED FISH THAT FIGHT BACK TANK THE RATINGS, KIDDO. KINDA RUINS THE PO⌁ER FANTASY, YKNO⌁? ALSO SORRY TO SAY BUT YOU JUST DON'T REALLY HA⌁E THE LOOK FOR IT. ENJOY THE SHO⌁, THOUGH. ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
HAH! NOT ANY TYPE YOU'D LIKE, I THINK, PUMPKIN. ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
JEEZUS THEN GO GET ⌁ITH THE OTHER KIDDIE POOL STUFF HAPPENING ELSE⌁HERE. I'M HERE TO SELL HIGH OCTANE THRILLS TO BLOODTHIRSTY MASSES ⌁HO GOT A ⌁ENDETTA AND AN AXE TO GRIND. ⌁ORKS LIKE CATNIP. ⌁HATE⌁ER, SURE, MAYBE THERE'LL BE A FE⌁ SEGMENTS ⌁HERE THEY GET OUT ⌁ITH ONLY A FE⌁ SCRATCHES. SOME FOLKS MIGHT DIG THE PSYCHOLOGICAL DAMAGE SHIT, YEAH... EH I'LL TOSS IT TO PR, SEE ⌁HAT THEY COME UP ⌁ITH. ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
AFTER #LISTENING AND #LEARNING FROM THE POPULAR CONSENSUS THIS E⌁ENING, ⌁E AT SATURN INTERSTELLAR ARE PROUD TO INTRODUCE #COLLARASEAD⌁ELLERTHURSDAY TO THE TRIPLE XXX ROSTER OF THE AFTERLITE SATURN NET⌁ORK. FISH MIGHT BE A RARE FRIGGIN SIGHT O⌁ER HERE ON OUR SIDE OF THE MULTI⌁ERSE, BUT HEY, ALL THE MORE SPECIAL TO SEE ⌁HAT HAPPENS NEXT, RIGHT? (ALL AFTERLITE PROGRAMMING IS RATED NC-6S/NC-17Y FOR POSSIBLE #NSF⌁E, #⌁IOLENCE, #GORE, #RE⌁ERSECASTEPLAY, #GUNFREAKS, #SPONTANEOUSEXPLOSIONS, AND #GRATUITOUSSOUNDEFFECTFOLEY.) ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
SATURN INTERSTELLAR IS NOT AFFILIATED ⌁ITH THE PAN SCRAMBLE CONJECTURES MADE BY @CHILLERAFICIONADO . ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
THAT LITTLE EARTH GRECO-ROMAN PRETTY BOY KID CONTINUES TO BE THE SMARTEST BACKER ON THIS PLATFORM. GOOD TASTE, GOOD FOR HIM, HA⌁E A COOKIE. > @ONE⌁INGEDFUDANSHI HAS BEEN A⌁ARDED A 500 C. COUPON TO BE REDEEMED ON ANY PRODUCTS OF SATURN INTERSTELLAR, CROCKER CORP., & AFFILIATED BRANDS. < ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
IT'S EASY AS HELL, ESPECIALLY IF YOU CATER TO THE ⌁ISUAL HANDS ON KINDA LEARNERS. ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
YKNO⌁, SOME NIGHTS I THINK A LESSER TROLL ⌁OULD'⌁E BURNT HIS CANDLE OUT AT BOTH ENDS BY NO⌁ ⌁ITH THE ⌁HOLE HERO BUSINESS. BUT THEN I REMEMBER ALL THE FACES--REALLY BEAUTIFUL, LO⌁ING FACES--OF E⌁ERYONE COUNTING ON ME TO STAY POISED AND ERECT AS ALTERNIA'S BASTION OF HOPE AND PEACE. JUST ⌁ARMS MY PUSHER RIGHT UP, YKNO⌁? ANY⌁AY, YACK YACK YACK ASIDE. GONNA BE DOING ONE OF MY ⌁HIRL⌁IND TOURS THIS ⌁EEK, INSPECT SOME NE⌁ PO⌁ER PLANTS, CUT SOME RIBBONS, MAYBE FLUSH OUT SOME ROACHES, MAKE EM SCATTER. THE ⌁HOLE SHEBANG. HO⌁'S E⌁ERYONE ELSE'S NIGHT GOING, TOTALLY GOING TO LISTEN AND BE INTERESTED AND REPLY TO EACH ONE OF YOU ⌁ITH CAREFUL INDI⌁IDUAL ATTENTION. ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
CAN'T DO #MATESPRITMONDAY ON ACCOUNT OF BEING JUST TOO GODDAMN COMMITTED TO LO⌁E THAT IT'D BE UNFAIR TO PIN IT TO JUST ONE OR E⌁EN A FE⌁ PEOPLE. I'M TRYING TO BE GENEROUS HERE. ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
Honestly don't know what I did that pissed you off so bad, Emp!
ALL PUBLICITY IS GOOD PUBLICITY. BUT HEY, MAYBE GET YOUR HEAD CHECKED BEFORE YOU START MOTORMOUTHING ABOUT SOME NAME THAT DOESN'T EXIST AGAIN, KAY? ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
Omg you unblocked me yaaayyy
DON'T NEED TO ASK ⌁HO ⌁ANT ME ⌁HEN I ALREADY KNO⌁, YKNO⌁? ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
don't talk ABOUT me, you don't even know m, my life is PLENTY full mind you
I'M NOT TALKING TO YOU. I MADE MY O⌁N FRIGGIN POST FOR A REASON, JACKOFF. ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
OH LITERALLY NOTHING IMPORTANT. ANY⌁AY YOU DO REALIZE THERE'S STILL AN HIC IN OPERATION ⌁HERE I'M AT, RIGHT? MORE UNDERSTATED THAN HER OLD REGIME USED TO BE, SURE, BUT I STILL AIN'T ABOUT TO GI⌁E ANYONE THE ⌁RONG IDEA. NO ROYALTY HERE KIDDO JUST PURE BRASS TACKS HEROICS. ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
don't talk to me
FOR THE RECORD I AM NOT THE BLACK MIRROR EPISODE. AND THE OTHER GUY IS MAYBE, BARELY SCRAPING BY AT THE BOTTOM OF THE BARREL AS THE ⌁APID COFFEESHOP AU ⌁HERE NOTHING HAPPENS, E⌁ER. ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
SATURN INTERSTELLAR LO⌁ES OUR UNIONS, BY THE ⌁AY. ⌁ERY PRO UNION. THAT'S ⌁HY OUR ⌁ORKPLACE SATISFACTION RATINGS HA⌁E BEEN 10/10 FOR THE LAST SE⌁EN S⌁EEPS AND COUNTING. DUNNO ⌁HY THAT HAS TO BE EXPLAINED, YKNO⌁, ⌁E'RE ALL A FAMILY HERE. LO⌁E THRO⌁ING A BIG COOKOUT BARBECUE FOR THE GOOD OL COMPANY TROLLS ⌁ORKING SO BLAH BLAH BLAH EDIT THE REST OF THIS GOODY GOODY CRAP LATER BEFORE YOU POST IT. ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
⌁HAT, LIKE IT'S HARD TO HATE IT? HATING YOUR KEYBOARD TRASH TAKES ABOUT AS MUCH RECOLLECTI⌁E EFFORT AS REMEMBERING A SINGULAR CASE OF PUSHERBURN THREE ⌁EEKS AGO. ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
OH LIKE YOU THINK YOU'RE *THAT* MEMORABLE, HUH? ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
FINISHED THE NE⌁ REHASH OF THE HQ OFFICE. I KNO⌁ YOU'RE PROBABLY ⌁ONDERING, SATURN, DIDN'T YOU JUST REMODEL? AND THE ANS⌁ER IS NO YOU POOR FUMBLING MORON I REMODELED THE OFFSITE OFFICE ONE ⌁EEK AGO, THIS IS DIFFERENT AND E⌁EN BETTER, KEEP UP. ANY⌁AY TAKE A GOOD LONG LOOK AT THIS HANDSOME LINEUP. JUST ME AND THE BEST PEOPLE I KNO⌁. LET'S HOPE I DON'T GET TOO DISTRACTED BY ALL THE PRETTY FACES, HUH? ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
FIGURED I COULD THRO⌁ MY HAT INTO THE RING ⌁ITH ONE OF THOSE AMA THINGS. I'M AN OPEN BOOK, I KNO⌁ THE INTER⌁IE⌁S DON'T AL⌁AYS CAPTURE THE IN SITU ENERGY BUT I PROMISE I'M JUST A FLESH AND BLOOD TROLL JUST LIKE YOU. HTTPS://FORMS.GLE/BHM⌁SL176RGYM59Z7 ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
SOMEONE ASKS: HI *SATURN.* CAN YOU TELL US A LITTLE ABOUT YOUR TIMELINE? YOU MADE A FUN LITTLE TYPO THERE KITTEN, FIXED IT FOR YOU. MUST'⌁E HAD A MINOR PAN ANYEURISM OR SOMETHING YOU MIGHT ⌁ANNA GET THAT CHECKED OUT. NOTE TO MY DESK MONKEYS, MAKE SURE TO INCLUDE SOMETHING ABOUT CHITTR HANDLE AND IP ADDRESS FOR THE FUTURE SO ⌁E CAN SEND MEDICAL CARE ASAP TO ANYONE ELSE THAT DOESN'T HA⌁E A FUCKING FUNCTIONAL PAN. ANY⌁AY! SURE I CAN TELL YOU ABOUT IT. ⌁ELL FOR ONE, ALTERNIA IS OUT OF ITS DARK AGES AFTER A ⌁ALIANT NEAR-BLOODLESS RESTRUCTURE. I STARTED IN HUMBLE BEGINNINGS, JUST A SIMPLE SELF-EXILED TROLL OPENING HIS EYES TO THE REST OF HO⌁ THE UNI⌁ERSE ⌁ORKS, SICK OF THE SOCIOPATHIC BLOODSHED IN HIS HOME. SEE, IT ⌁OULD HA⌁E BEEN EASY TO TURN MY BACK ON MY FELLO⌁ TROLLKIND, BUT I KNE⌁ DEEP IN MY PUSHER I HAD TO COME BACK SOMEDAY AND DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. SO, I (BRA⌁ELY NOT KNO⌁ING THE OUTCOME BUT ALSO DAMN FUCKING CLEAR THAT IT ⌁AS GONNA BE BADASS AND HEROIC) DID ⌁HAT NO OTHER TROLL HAS DONE BEFORE, AND SET MY SIGHTS ON A DEAL THAT HIC HERSELF COULDN'T REFUSE. I ⌁ON'T BOG YOUR PAN DAMAGED NOGGIN ⌁ITH THE ⌁HOLE SCOPE OF IT, BUT SHORT STORY MADE SHORTER? THAT LOUDMOUTH HORROR SQUID ⌁E ALL BEEN AQUI⌁ER O⌁ER SINCE ⌁E FIRST MOLTED IS PERMANENTLY OUT OF COMMISSION. HIC HERSELF ⌁AS MO⌁ED TO TRUE EMPATHETIC TEARS BY THE COSMIC EFFORT ⌁E PULLED OFF AND HER PUSHER GRE⌁ THREE SIZES THAT DAY. NO MORE DEAD LUSII, NO MORE HEMOTYPE-BASED CULLINGS SA⌁E FOR THE TELE⌁ISED RECIPROCITY COURT THAT COMES ON AT 1800 E⌁ERY CYCLE (RATINGS JUST DOUBLED BY THE ⌁AY), SATURN CORP. IS COMMITTED TO MERIT-BASED COMPETITION, THE MERGER OF THE ALTERNIAN EMPIRE ⌁ITH EARTH ⌁ENT OFF GORGEOUSLY FI⌁E S⌁EEPS AGO. AND HEY! E⌁EN THE OCEANS ARE FINALLY BOUNCING BACK A LITTLE THANKS TO OUR ECOLOGICAL TEAM ⌁ORKING AROUND THE CLOCK. THEY FIGURE IT SHOULD BE PERMANENTLY LI⌁EABLE AGAIN IN AS LITTLE AS TEN MORE S⌁EEPS. SO YEAH, I'D SAY LIFE IS PRETTY GREAT IN THIS TIMELINE IF YOU'RE E⌁ER THINKING OF STARTING O⌁ER SOME⌁HERE NE⌁. THANKS FOR THE CHANCE FOR THE PROMO. ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
SOMEONE ASKED: DO YOU HA⌁E RINGS? SURE DO. I KEEP EM AT HOME FOR THE PENCIL PUSHING CI⌁ILIAN SIDE OF SHIT MOSTLY SINCE THEY GET IN THE ⌁AY ⌁ITH HANDS-ON ⌁ORK. ⌁OULDN'T ⌁ANT THEM TO GET STAINED TOO BADLY. I'LL TAKE SOME PICS LATER. ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
SOMEONE ASKED: HO⌁ OFTEN U JACKIN OFF CHEEKY, I LIKE IT ZZ;). ⌁HAT YOU'RE LOOKING FOR IS A SUBSCRIPTION TO THE SATURN AFTERLIGHT NET⌁ORK, BEST SPOT FOR TAKING CARE OF ALL KINDSA CEO-ROCKSTAR-AND-HIS-NER⌁OUS-FAN FANTASIES. NO⌁ COMES ⌁ITH HARD LIGHT INTERACTI⌁E HOLOGRAMS! BUT I'LL GI⌁E YOU THIS ONE FOR FREE: DON'T NEED TO JACK OFF ⌁HEN YOU GOT A HALF DOZEN S⌁EETHEARTS JUST GAGGING FOR IT. THAT SAID, EH, MAYBE ONCE OR T⌁ICE A ⌁EEK JUST FOR THE TLC. #NSF⌁ ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
*SATURN*LO⌁ER69 ASKED: THANKS *SATURN*, THAT ⌁AS REALLY ILLUMINATING. P SURE THIS IS THE EXPOSITION PERSON BUT I ALSO LIKE TO THINK IT'S THE PERSON ⌁HO ASKED ABOUT THE JACKING OFF TOO. YOU'RE SO ⌁ERY FUCKING ⌁ELCOME, STRANGER THAT I'D LO⌁E TO GET TO KNO⌁ BETTER. ⌁HY DON'T YOU HOP IN MY MESSAGES AND ⌁E CAN TALK ABOUT IT MORE IN PRI⌁ATE? #SUGGESTI⌁E ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁
*SATURN'S* FRIEND...K DUNNO IF I'D GO THAT FAR YET SUGAR, LEMME BUY YOU DINNER FIRST, ANY⌁AY. SATURN'S FRIEND ASKED: *SATURN*, ⌁HATS SO BAD ABOUT DENYING OKAY I'M GONNA OMIT THE LAST HALF OF THAT ONE, THIS IS GETTING JUST SILLY. NE⌁ER HEARD THAT NAME IN MY LIFE. MAYYYBE IN A HISTORY SCHOOLFEEDS SOME⌁HERE, BUT MOST OF THAT STUFF'S MADE UP OR LONG GONE OR EDITED BY THE OLD GUARD TO MAKE EM LOOK GOOD ANY⌁AY. BUMMER. YOU SHOULD REALLY ⌁ATCH ⌁HAT MISINFORMATION YOU PLUG INTO YOUR PAN, PUMPKIN. IT'LL KILL YOU SOMEDAY. ⌁⌁ SATURN INTERSTELLAR, HERE FOR YOU ⌁HEN YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT ⌁⌁