I am your ever transparent Host. To be precise and accurate with my current tier of employ, gaze upon my roster of newly hired individuals. @gullibleColumnist as the Doormaid. In this highly specialized role, the Doormaid will be in charge of the Keys to my manor and penthouse. @pliableDecadence#3682 as the Cuekeeper. You will find Serpaz's unique talents lend greatly to the maintenance of the various machinations assigned to her existence. @carbolicGalvanologist as the Chalkbox. As the Felt's Custodial Utilitarian, Karkat currently presides under direct command of the Handmaid during his trial period. A strong recommendation from Kurloz Makara has landed him this position. @terribleFate as the Nameless. Caliborn recruited this individual, whose many services are free to any member of English's Chosen upon request. Of course, there are many more to be considered, as this does not include my various contractors, free agents, double agents, triple agents, or those who simply enjoy the presence of the Felt in their operations. I have roughly twenty three more applicants to file through tonight. I will be doing so whilst enjoying the sweet chords of my Songbird, whose handle shall remain hidden until she decides it is time for her grand debut.
DO I SOUND LIKE I'M WORRYING? I DON'T WORRY. WORRYING IS FOR THE FUCKHONKING BIRDS, AND I HATE BIRDS. REST ON YOUR LAURELS HERE SCRATCH, WE'RE LIKE THE APPLE-WALMART-NAMEBRAND OF TIME TRAVELING MAFIAS. THE TICKET'S ALREADY PUNCHED. THE .ATH FILE'S ALREADY GOING TO HAVE HAD BEEN RAN WHEN IT'S RUN WHEN THE TIME FOR IT TO HAVE HAD ALREADY BEEN RAN ARRIVES. MY FELT. HIS FELT. THE FELT. WHATEVER. I'LL BE IN THE FUMOIR WITH A DAMARA WATCHING MY SOAPS.
…AH. AH, OH DEAR. YOU SPECIFICALLY BEING ALIVE AGAIN IS ACTUALLY QUITE THE PROBLEM, I MUST SAY. HM.
When I am able to take a moment to don my smoking jacket, perhaps I shall join you in one iteration of self or another.
You likely should not, given your relationships to certain agents, and spliced carapacians. Simply, it would not be a 'good look' to father dearest.
Next time you make a post about your fault can I be included? Not as an employee, just, y'know. And Casper. My felt and Casper. If it's not too much trouble.
wont let ya down boss!!!! (|:D