F. GAINES, CEO. [ABG INC.]
@liquidLiability
FINSAL GAINES, CEO OF THE NEW ALTERNIAN EMPIRE BANKING, INVESTMENT, AND FINANCIAL SERVICES GROUP INC. BUT YOU CAN CALL ME SAL! ;-D HE/HIM ABG INC. WE'RE WATCHING YOUR WALLET.
𝓣𝓸 𝔀𝓱𝓸𝓶𝓮𝓿𝓮𝓻 𝓲𝓽 𝓶𝓪𝔂 𝓬𝓸𝓷𝓬𝓮𝓻𝓷, Sometimes its kind of hard to believe some of the people on here that arent Mr. Ozatap are also CEO's... no offense ~ 𝓜𝓼. 𝓢𝓬𝓻𝓲𝓹𝓽
MR. OZATAP IS INDEED THE PINNACLE OF PROFESSIONALISM THAT WE SHOULD ALL STRIVE TOWARDS, I CAN SEE WHY IT WOULD BE DIFFICULT TO SEE THE REST OF US AS ANYTHING BUT PALE IMITATIONS OF SUCH AN UPSTANDING, MATURE, AND CAPABLE INDIVIDUAL, BUT I ASSURE YOU, MY DEAR GIRL, EVERY SINGLE ONE OF US IS DOING OUR BEST, AND LEARNING, GROWING, AND CHANGING EVERY SINGLE DAY, AND PERHAPS ONE DAY WE WILL ASCEND TO THE SAME HEIGHTS AS YOUR IMPRESSIVELY SELF-MADE BOSS! -- F. GAINES, CEO [ABG INC.]
𝓣𝓸 𝔀𝓱𝓸𝓶𝓮𝓿𝓮𝓻 𝓲𝓽 𝓶𝓪𝔂 𝓬𝓸𝓷𝓬𝓮𝓻𝓷, Um. Calm down please you're stressing me out ~ 𝓜𝓼. 𝓢𝓬𝓻𝓲𝓹𝓽
HAHA YES MA'AM, MS. SECRETARY SCRIPT! :-) -- F. GAINES, CEO [ABG INC.]
GOOD DUSK ONCE AGAIN MY LITTLE CHICKADEES, LET'S HAVE OURSELVES A MOST PRODUCTIVE THURSDAY! I AM STARTING MY THURSDAY WITH A CARAMEL FRAPPÉ AND A HUGE FUCKING CHOCOLATE DANISH. :-) -- F. GAINES, CEO [ABG INC.]
Ok ii jusst checked your profiile nvm ii maade thaat comment aass aa joke but iitss aactuaally true wtf
Hey, same here! Excellent taste, my good man!
HAHA, YES! I TAKE PRIDE IN MY POSITION AS CEO OF THE NEW ALTERNIAN EMPIRE BANKING, INVESTMENT, AND FINANCIAL SERVICES GROUP INC., AS IT IS A VERY IMPORTANT SYSTEM TO UPHOLD, BECAUSE WITHOUT BANKS, THERE WOULD BE NO ORDER WITHIN THE MONETARY TUMULT OF SOCIETY AT LARGE, THERE WOULD BE NO LOANS AND THUS NO BUSINESS STARTUPS, WITHOUT THESE WONDERFUL SYSTEMS IN PLACE TO HELP GUIDE US AND CREATE A MORE ORGANIZED SOCIETY, WE WOULD ALL NEED TO FEND FOR OURSELVES IN THE FINANCIAL WORLD, AND THAT JUST WON'T DO, IT IS NECESSARY, ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY I TELL YOU, AND I AM JUST SO HAPPY TO PLAY MY PART! ALSO I AM SO HAPPY TO HAVE MY BIG FUCKING CHOCOLATE DANISH! -- F. GAINES, CEO [ABG INC.]
⧃ Good gravy, I fell asleep at my desk. I never do that.
IT'S TOUGH BEING THE BOSS! STILL, THERE'S NOTHING THAT A LITTLE COFFEE CAN'T FIX! GOOD LUCK, CODSPEED, KEEP YOUR CHIN UP AND HEAD HELD HIGH (OFF YOUR DESK, HA!), KING! -- F. GAINES, CEO [ABG INC.]
hhhhhh mmyy wwoorrkk ddaayy wwaass, uunneevveennrrbbttffuu ll yyeesstteerrddaayy , ssoo iitt oonnllyy mmaakkeess sseennssee,tthhaatt ii wwoouuddll, ll,oossee mmrr ggaaiinneess ooffffiicceebb kkeeyy, ,ttooddaayy uuwwgghh, , ssnnff, (っ╥﹏╥ς) -- H. MERGAL, SECRETARY [ABG INC.]
MERGAL MY SWEET SUMMER MERGAL I KNOW THIS IS A BIT OF A DISASTER, AS I HAVE LEFT MY OWN KEYS INSIDE THAT OFFICE, AS WELL AS MANY OTHER IMPORTANT DOCUMENTS THAT I REQUIRE TODAY, BUT I FEAR THAT IF I "LOSE MY COOL" AT YOU, YOU WILL CRUMBLE INTO DRY LITTLE TISSUE FIBERS, AND I ENJOY YOU TOO MUCH FOR THAT, SO WE WILL SIMPLY PERSEVERE AND BE VERY STRONG AND BRAVE DURING THIS TRYING TIME, AND YOU WILL CALL IN THE JANITORIAL STAFF EARLY, AS I AM ALMOST CERTAIN THEY WILL HAVE THEIR OWN SET OF MASTER KEYS SO THAT I MAY RESCUE MY OWN KEYS AND DOCUMENTS FROM THEIR HORRIBLE SCARY JAIL OF ONE-WAY TINTED GLASS. GOOD COD THEY MUST BE SO LONELY AND AFRAID IN THERE MERGAL. I MISS MY OFFICE. -- F. GAINES, CEO [ABG INC.]
hhff, ii,,,,,,, , tthhiinnkk, ii lloocckkee dd mmyysseellff, oouutt ooff, mmyy hhiivvee , , ii wwiillll, cclliimmbb iinn tthhrroouuhhgg, tthhee wwiinnddoo ww, , -- H. MERGAL, SECRETARY [ABG INC.]
MERGAL, MY PITIFUL MERGAL, DO YOU NOT KEEP AN EMERGENCY KEY SOMEWHERE? -- F. GAINES, CEO [ABG INC.]
ssrrooyyww, tthhiiss , wwaass tthhee eemmeerrggee nnccyy ssee,tt tthhaatt, ii lloosstt , -- H. MERGAL, SECRETARY [ABG INC.]
OH MY SWEET LITTLE BEST-IN-SHOW FIRST PRIZE WINNER BARKBEAST WHO WILL KEEL OVER IF SOMEONE SO MUCH AS COUGHS ON YOU. -- F. GAINES, CEO [ABG INC.]
MY WORK HAS BEEN COMPLETED, AND NOW, MERGAL——DELICATE, TONER-COVERED MERGAL——AND MYSELF WILL EACH INDIVIDUALLY BE GOING HIVE AFTER OUR HARD NIGHT'S WORK, THOUGH I WILL BE KEEPING AN EYE ON HER AS SHE LEAVES THE OFFICE, AS PRIOR TO THE INCIDENT TWO WEEKS AGO, I HAD NO CLUE SHE COULD ATTRACT CATASTROPHES AS HORRIBLE AS SCUTTLEBUGGY ACCIDENTS, AND THOUGH IT WAS FUNNY AS A MOTHER FUCK, I DO NOT ESPECIALLY WANT TO SEE HER GET LAUNCHED THREE YARDS BACKWARDS DUE TO THE INTENSE FORCE OF A SPEEDING BUGGY'S BUMPER CRASHING INTO HER SWEATY, SHAKING, EASILY-BREAKABLE BODY AGAIN AND MAKING HER BOUNCE HARD AS FUCK AGAINST THE PAVEMENT SIX-TO-EIGHT TIMES. AGAIN. -- F. GAINES, CEO [ABG INC.]
I HAVE NOT HAD CAFFEINE IN SEVERAL HOURS I AM JUST EXCITED AS PISS FOR MY FIVE DOLLAR FUCK LONG. -- F. GAINES, CEO [ABG INC.]
IF IT DOES NOT LIVE UP TO THE HYPE I AM GOING TO BEAT THE ASS OUT OF THE NEAREST TRASH RECEPTACLE BEFORE REALIZING I JUST VANDALIZED PUBLIC PROPERTY AND THEN IMMEDIATELY FEELING RELIEVED BECAUSE I AM RICH AS BITCHFUCK AND A FINE IS NOTHING MORE THAN A GENTLE TAP TO MY ENDEARINGLY SMALL AND PERT BUTT CHEEKS. -- F. GAINES, CEO [ABG INC.]
YES I HAVE BEEN TOLD MY BEHIND IS VERY SMALL AND CUTE AND I WILL TAKE THIS COMPLIMENT EVERYWHERE WITH ME AND WILL NOT ACCEPT ANY CRITICISM OF MY TIGHT CHEEKS THANK YOU. -- F. GAINES, CEO [ABG INC.]
IT IS VERY LATE AND THOUGH I AM VERY HUNGRY I WILL NOT MAKE MY CHEF COME IN AT THIS HOUR BECAUSE I AM A VERY GENEROUS EMPLOYER WHO CAN LOOK OUT FOR HIS OWN NEEDS, SO I HAVE DECIDED TO INTERFACE WITH THE COMMON FOLK AND ACQUIRE A SANDWICH FROM A SEEMINGLY VERY POPULAR EATERY, WHICH ODDLY SHARES ITS NAME WITH A PUBLIC TRANSPORT SYSTEM, INSTEAD OF THE SUBMARINE SANDWICHES THEY APPARENTLY BOAST THERE, THOUGH IT IS NOT AS THOUGH THE NAME MATTERS SO MUCH, JUST THE FOOD, AND I PERSONALLY COULD NOT BE MORE EXCITED TO TRY IT. I CANNOT WAIT FOR MY FIVE DOLLAR FUCK LONG, MY PALMS AND MOUTH ARE WET FROM ANTICIPATION AND I FEEL A VERY VERY LIGHT TINGLING SENSATION SOMEWHERE I SHALL NOT BE EXPRESSING PUBLICLY. -- F. GAINES, CEO [ABG INC.]
The manner in which you speak fascinates me. There is something wrong.
I AM HAPPY TO BE AN OBJECT OF FASCINATION, AS I HAVE FOUND MYSELF TO ME FOR MANY INDIVIDUALS! -- F. GAINES, CEO [ABG INC.]
AHHH, I LOVE TO STAY LATE AT THE OFFICE WITH MY DEVOTED MERGAL! HE IS VERY OBEDIENT, YOU KNOW, WHAT A WONDERFUL QUALITY FOR AN EMPLOYEE TO HAVE, SO DUTIFUL IN HANDING ME MY DOCUMENTS SO THAT I MAY CONTINUE WORKING LATE AND FINALLY WRAP UP LOOKING OVER THESE FILES, WHICH I HAD NEGLECTED TO DO EARLIER, DUE TO INCIDENTS INVOLVING THE PRINTER-SLASH-COPIER-SLASH-FAX MACHINE, THAT MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE BEEN CAUSED BY MERGAL, MY SWEET, INNOCENT, DARLING MERGAL, HIMSELF, THOUGH BY NO FAULT OF HIS OWN, AS HE SIMPLY CANNOT HELP BUT DRAW DISASTER TOWARDS HIMSELF, LIKE A BIG, POWERFUL CATASTROPHE MAGNET-- NOT THAT I COULD EVER IN A MILLION SWEEPS BE UPSET AT HIM, NO NO, AS HE IS FAR TOO PATHETIC, WET, AND CRUMPLED, LIKE A NAPKIN FROM A FAST FOOD DRIVE THROUGH THAT FLEW OUT THE WINDOW OF AN OLD, BEAT UP SCUTTLEBUGGY HALFWAY THROUGH THE SPEEDING DRIVE OVER THE HIGHWAY AND LANDED IN A YUCKYGROSS PUDDLE OF DIRTY GREENISH-BROWNISH WATER OFF THE SIDE OF THE ROAD AND HALFWAY DISINTEGRATED DUE TO BEING MADE OF A RECYCLABLE AND BIODEGRADABLE MATERIAL, ONLY MADE THIS WAY BECAUSE OF THE, FRANKLY, SHITTY EATERY'S THINLY-VEILED PR STUNT TO APPEAR SOCIALLY CONSCIOUS DURING THIS TIME OF SHIFTING POLITICAL PRIORITIES THAT GLORIFY VIRTUE SIGNALING OVER ACTUAL DIRECT ACTION, AND THUS, CANNOT WITHSTAND THE ELEMENTS, AS IT IS SPECIFICALLY DESIGNED TO RETURN TO THE SOIL, LIKE ALL SOFT BODIES MUST. -- F. GAINES, CEO [ABG INC.]
Oh, you're insane. I get it now.
HA! NO, NO, I MERELY HAVE AN ACTIVE IMAGINATION AND A VERY CREATIVE SOUL, AS TOLD TO ME BY MY TUTOR A LONG TIME AGO, DURING MY HIVESCHOOLFEEDING DAYS, RIGHT BEFORE SHE RESIGNED! I MISS HER. -- F. GAINES, CEO [ABG INC.]
Dude, you killed her.
KILLED HER? NO, NO! AS I UNDERSTAND, SHE SIMPLY HAD ANOTHER JOB SHE WANTED TO DO. AHH BUT I REMEMBER OUR SESSIONS FONDLY, YES, SHE WAS OH SO VERY KIND TO ME, AND IN TURN, I REGALED HER WITH ALL OF MY MOST FAVORITE STORIES AND TALES, IN THEIR COMPLETE FORMS, MANY OF WHICH WERE COMPLETELY FICTIONAL, AND MADE UP DURING MY MANY BOUTS OF UNFOCUSED NIGHTDREAMING, LOGGED IN MY SPONGE, READY TO BE PUT TO PAGE ANY DAY, BUT THAT WAS A LONG TIME AGO NOW, HAHA, NO, NOW, THE ONLY THING BEING PUT TO PAGE ARE MY MEMOIRS AND PROFESSIONAL DEVELOPMENT BOOKS, MAINLY CENTERING AROUND FINANCE, BUSINESS, AND WORK ETHIC, WITH MY PERFECT, BEAUTIFUL, SHINING FACE LINING EACH AND EVERY COVER OF MY NONFICTION LITERARY MASTERPIECES! -- F. GAINES, CEO [ABG INC.]