[ Fluttering through an unprotected crack in space-time is a note. It is pale green and marked with the letterhead of The Felt, an asymmetrically silhouetted Felt Manor viewed from the north side. The central spire is tipped by a glittering pearlescent drop of white ink. Scrawled beneath: a missive issued in cramped but neat cursive, richly maroon. The page is creased in two places, as though fit into an envelope at one point. ] To the editor in chief of Midnight City's ANTHROPODOGY Publication Office. Your journalistic excellence motivates me to stay apprised of your latest issues. I have no complaints, usually. In the June article of Movement As Culture, penned by Jubilant Communicant, a small paragraph detailing the dances typically associated with Leprechaun #Charms was included. Nine lines in all. A critical oversight on your part: none of it is accurate. Barely even legible, if we're hacking away at honesty. But we've had some... professional dealings in the past, sir. You pay your dues. You keep current on the news I read for. It's good work you do. Favor for the favors. Included is a short list of corrections to the charm-dance associations. Try to have August reflect an update. Wouldn't want to see you getting replaced so soon after your... chief predecessor left a vacancy in position. 🩷 Waltz. Measured, intimate, there's a way to do it. Someone always leads. 🔷 Jitterbug. Warm regards, lots of coordinated movement. Equals in every way. ⭐ Polka. Having fun, getting to know someone, learning the ropes. Someone leads. 🌙 Breakaway. Pursuit, distance, maintaining an orbit that push-pulls. Trading lead. 🎈 Flamenco. Fighting for control at all times. Nobody leads, but both are trying to. 🧲 Salsa. Performance for the sake of it. Compelling narrative. Someone leads. 🍀 Freestep. Testing waters. Setting to a pace. Lead-in before other charms. No leads. 💰 Bump or Boogaloo. Shoulder to shoulder, bar-fight-as-dance. No leads. 🌈 Swing. Knowing the dance by heart. Didn't have to practice it once. Someone leads. With occupational annoyance, Crowbar, Mister Seven of the Felt
AMATEUR CHARMOLOGISTS. COME GET YOUR SLOP. STRAIGHT FROM THE FROG'S VENT. @carbolicGalvanologist @carmineGnosiology.
👞👢👟hmmm....a waltz jitterbug polka breakaway flamenco style salsa freestep bump boogaloo swing???? might be difficult to get through allllllllll in just one night buuuuuuuuuuuuuut...!!!!👞👞👢 🫰🙌 since you went out of your way to tagggggggg me, and the medictator has assured me the stuff theyre flying in from overseas is deeeeeeeeeeeefinitely gonna take care of this awful cramp in my leg, like, omg? maybe? nah definitely. you have been sooooooo nicies to me since i got to the manor, like, how can i not? 🙌🫰 😄😆😅 sit tight, OK bestie? LA À𝐍𝐎𝐔𝐕𝐄𝐀𝐔 𝙃𝘼𝙉𝘿𝙈𝘼𝙄𝘿 is gonna show you some fancy footwork yet!!! it'll be sooooooooooo so so so lovely, and it'll make you forget all about the rancid skank bitch rust in your comment's section...not naming names! just shaming shames! hahahahah! i kid, i kid, it's damara 😅😆😄 🫵🫵🫶 you! me. all these dances you asked for, promie 🫶🫵🫵 #Chairministrangling #PlayingMusicalChairs #DancingUpTheCorporateLadder #EliteBallKnowledge #GalanteedToHaveAGoodTime 🟢 CHARMS is ONLINE AND EN POINTE.
... What?
「MOM. MOMMY. MAMA. THERE'S A DISGUSTING BUG FLYING AROUND ME. KILL IT. KILL IT AND EAT IT. ONEGAI.」
Starting to see your pressing concerns about the new hire, Maid.
I TAKE NO PLEASURE IN HAVING TOLD YOU SO. #NOPLEASURE. #NONE. #PLATONIC. #CHASTE. #CELIBATE. #SFW.