D Strider
@turnaciousGeromy
: He's a hot mess. The most put together hot mess, but still. A little high-strung, unrepentant workaholic and perfectionist who is passionate about his work, be that SBaHJ or a different movie.
https://i.imgur.com/ZAFM9j1.png
Man, I'm so sorry. You're getting a speed run of bullshit I've been Tokyo Drifting through since 2014. I should learn pacing a little better. Never been a good story teller, or for that matter knowing when to stop spilling words all over a page. That's supposed to be funny, by the way. Anyway, yeah. I can give you the SparkNotes on it, but I am concerned about overwhelming you first conversation. Long story short, I crashed into this timeline, Sawtooth was waiting for me and brought me back to this hella sweet penthouse. Couple years go by, I'm assuming some bullshit happened (there's gaps in my memory), I end up meeting this Horrorterror. She turned out to be chill. Asked me to be her charge, promised some pretty sweet deals like home cooking and company, maybe even conditional immortality. So I said hell yeah, let's fuck it up. Met my ex-best friend, he's a ghost, couldn't come chill with me. Horrorterrors make the bubbles, so she bubbled my planet on up for me. That's why I have these spots on me. It's a territorial mark. Kind of like a branding situation. I don't know if you like shadow puppets? But I can put on one hell of a show.
You dont need to apologize dude. I get it. You know I gotta learn brevity too. Most of my successful posts are like 3 paragraph essays minimum. Fucking dissertations. Terrible note to word ratio. Inefficient. In this economy. In *this* economy. Unsustainable... Everyone else posting "blowing my balls up at the bomb factory" and getting 50000 notes. Amazing ROI. Theyre the future and Im on dialup. The market's gonna outcompete me. ...That was also supposed to be a joke. But seriously dont worry about it. I dont expect you to be able to say all your thoughts perfectly the first time or even the hundredth. And dont worry about overwhelming me either. If youve got the patience of a saint then Ive got the listening capabilities of one. So basically youre like a DnD warlock then and this horror terror is your patron. Honestly sounds terrifying. Ive never been good with that shit. Scooby Doo is about as scary as I go. Like I know 90% of it is all fake movie effects which is my whole schtick but knowing something is smoke mirrors and special effects doesnt actually help when youre being jumped at by a monster with too many limbs on screen. Or in real life for that matter. Still it sounds pretty cool for you. And the spots are cute. Who is your ex friend though. And who is this Sawtooth person again.
Give me a TikTok after I've eaten my 2hr video essay. Surface level is great for sunbathing, but we can't discredit the cave diver. The open "Why" thinker. The Ted Talker. Need a healthy pairing, like Malort and Cheddar. Like Jaeger and Brie. Confession, I don't know how to pair booze and cheese. I just know how to throw both in my mouth. Yeah, I definitely feel like someone's broken character. Feels like one lifetime I'm Godtiering in a video game that both destroys and creates universes. Next lifetime, I'm shaking tentacles with a God and coughing up ink. All the while in-between I'm just trying to be Some Guy©, making friends, helping people, and indulging in my hobbies. It's all packaged up in the span of my 20's, like some fast track multi-level experience. I'll keep the terror-nonsense on the downlow when you stop by. Halfling life, but I'm erring on the side of human more often than I am on the Grimdark. The softie in me doesn't permit too much exposure, especially not socially. He went by a different name since at one point the alt population went crazy, but he was a Karkat alt. I don't really know where he got his nickname, but I called him FK. Sawtooth is one of my strifebots. He runs on surveillance and scouting most of the time. Or, I'm pretty sure that's what he's doing. Sometimes he has an agenda that I'm not even aware of and I'm the one who built and programmed him. He was made in place of a guardian, though I'll be honest since I had no frame of reference until I could connect to some bunked internet Condy left behind and download Slice Of Life animes, I just kind of thought he was supposed to be this tall dude who looked for supplies further than I could.
Karkat. Thats the one whos handle is carcinoGeneticist right. I ran into one of those here actually. Here as in Chittr not here as in my personal set of bubbles. He was weird even for a formic who are all at least a baseline of fucking weird. He all of a sudden out of the clear ass blue sky started role playing at me. I think technically he threatened to throw me down the stairs. It would have been hilarious if it wasnt so strange. Do you know if your Karkat is out here. Or is it more of a you dont want to know sort of situation. And what was his nickname. What was the F supposed to stand for. Fucking. Wait no actually are you seriously trying to tell me that you made a fighting robot that somehow made it into the same timeline you got yeeted into or was a different iteration of a robot an alternate you made. And this robot instead of strifing up and decided that he instead was going to be your guardian. Like he somehow on his own gained sentience and personhood enough to pull that shit. I would say that was crazy except that Ive heard from a few Hals over a nonspecific period of time and a lot of Dirks did something not dissimilar with him. Which is crazy so actually Im going to stick with my first impression here and say the whole accidental guardian robot is crazy. As in even crazier than everything else you just put down on me and you just told me you have conditional immortality and were shaking tentacles with a Horror Terror. Seriously you need to take a vacation and chill out. Take a much needed break from all the shenanigans going on in your existence.
I knew him as Futurekat. I don't know where he got the nickname, he had been using it prior to meeting him. And, nah, he's not on this website. I don't even know where he went physically.. Anyway, yeah. I can't prove this is the same Sawtooth I built. That any of these Strifebots are the same ones I built. Only that they act like they know me. Trust, it fucked me up too. The paradox shift hit me so hard on this timeline that I ended up in some padded room for a little while over it. I made him in place of a guardian but at the time I was a kid who had like two seasons of Dragon Ball Z so guardians to me were warriors that defended the Earth. Prepped me for the game. Maybe found food further out than I could. I can't also vouche for their sentience either. They act according to their programming, and most of the dialog with them is limited to whatever cool and fresh raps spill out their mechanical pieholes. Then again, how measurable is sentience when it's artificial? There's not really a DSM for robo-self-awareness. Which I'm sure they're aware of themselves to a certain level. On one hand they're advanced enough, but on the other they're still robots. I can't strip them of their identity just because they've advanced.
So Im guessing then since you didnt and dont know it wasnt as simple a matter as him being temporally shifted from the future into the past or, like you, from a different timeline that was temporally forward from you. Huh. Maybe he was just from a different timezone then. Ive found theres really no telling with aliens. They find the most mundane things to get upset over or the wildest shit in existence to find mundane. And honestly it sounded like you had enough crazy in your life without adding even more. I cant imagine what it must have been like dealing with not knowing if the people - or at least robots you were surrounded by were yours or from a different universe. Because if they were yours how did they get there and what does that mean about getting knocked into a different timeline. Thats gotta imply it was meant to be but from the sounds of it it was a total accident. And if they were not yours then whos. Or if you know that than youre staring down a familiar face that isnt quite right and you cant put your finger on why. Sorry I should probably stop now.
Yeah. It's hard to tell if this is a timeline that turned out differently than the one I originally crash landed on or if it's some sort of purgatory masking as a past life. It wasn't a bubble from the start, so this isn't a memory. As far as I know. Terrors can play the long draw though, so who knows if she was watching me from the moment I was ejected until the moment I was low enough to fork over my soul. But, yeah. Life's been a little crazy since the get go. I feel like I've been hogging up the spotlight here with background information that doesn't really progress a lot. I'm fairly interested in what you have going on currently. I'm aware of your attempts into an Earth C situation, but like, do you have hobbies? You play like.. sportball or something? Most importantly I guess would be favorite takeout. Because it'd be shitty of me to invite someone over for a movie without providing enough fuel and sustenance to keep the attention on the screen.
Okay well first of all youre not hogging up the spotlight at all. It sounds like youve been packing all this up and havent been able to tell anyone because the person you would have told fucked off. So now you have Lalondog who sure she has a good ear for listening but probably doesnt have much to say. Like when I pop over I might be able to tell when in the Sweet and Hella fuck is going on with your timeline. No guarantees mind you "might" here means there is maybe a fraction of single percent of a chance but dont get your hopes up because whatever Time BS I have has always been just that. BS. Yeah though I have hobbies. I dont sportsball but I do surf. Ill definitely have to take you out some time Ive got plenty of memories for some hella nasty waves. I never really had the chance too while alive- all culture basically was made illagal or got eradicated but in the bubbles Ive found I really like going to museums galleries pop up events that sort of thing. The best part about those places are the memories so the ones in the bubbles are indistinguishable from the ones that existed in life. At least thats what Ive been told I cant actually fact check for accuracy. Not going to lie but I also like to party. I know Im supposed to be a little old for it or a lot old but Ive always liked to be around people and let loose a little. Never much got the chance in life there was always something more important to do. Anyway you really dont need to worry about feeding me. Im not sure I even need to eat now that Im dead or if its just the memory of needing to that makes it feel like I do. And besides Im picky. The sort of take out I like is from my memory. The rest thats out there. Eh. Its edible I guess.
I don't think I've ever seen anyone surf in person. My exposure is limited to aesthetic beach movies. I'd be down to get a sneak peek at some live action Bay Watch. I never considered checking out the museums in the bubbles. The hub bubbles (hubbles if you will) I've committed the heinous act of infecting the land with my footprints usually focus on nightlife. Which, don't get me wrong, is awesome to partake in. I just find most times it's the same party, different bubble. Mine would be considered a hub bubble now by sheer population alone, and it's main focus is tourism and capitalistic driven retail therapy. I did like seeing the different plants from ghost memories. There's a botanical garden a couple hours from here that's pretty chill. It's really a 50/50 split on whether someone eats after death. Fk hated eating. Even after he was granted tenporary life through some weird ritual, he was so against eating I watched him starve himself to death. Then there's ghosts like my friend Cronus who made cooking their whole hobby. Can never tell if it's conditional to alternate timelines or if some ghosts are convinced the phantom hunger is a signal they have to eat. Should be studied more closely.
Trust me even Baywatch has nothing on watching someone catch a wave for real. And just watching still has nothing on grabbing a board and surfing the green room. You absolutely have to try it yourself. Also check out some museums galleries and clubs with me. Youre not long all the parties in the hubbles are the same. Its an endless night of shenanigans and debauchery but what isnt the same old same old in the hubbles. I think the last time I saw anything new was back when I didnt know I was dead yet and even then theres a chance Id seen the same thing a hundred times before but was so in denial my memory got wiped clean. And I wouldnt know now because you guessed it I dont remember. Shit actually I could also go for some retail therapy. I mean fuck capitalism and all but the way I see it here in the hubs capitalism is already dead I may as well beat its dead horse of a carcass and dance on is grave. Plus theres some cool shit I want to buy and its always more fun to try stuff on with a friend. To be fair I also was a picky eater in life too so maybe that has something to do with it in deaf. If youre that bothered by someone because of your ex not eating I can try some take out.
I wonder what my ectofather/bro would think of me working in a shitty tv show. If I learnt anything from Dave, he'd probably fuck hard with that.
Personally I would fuck so hard with that all of reality would need to think of a new word for fuck because I used up all its power going so hard it lost not only meaning but existence. There are no more fucks to give because the existence of fuck itself has ceased.
Yeah Id be hella on board. If you were open to collab and if that were possible you can sign me up.
I'd have to talk it over with Jake, but I'm sure I can get him to say yes. SBaHJ ass will be shaken on TV.
Oh I didnt know you already had a project partner. Thats sweet. If he does say yes youre always welcome to DM me.
fuck me man i cant remember shit after the third strip club someone clue a brother in i bet everything i did was badass and sexy and definitely didnt bring enough shame to haunt my bloodline for generations
Dont listen to all the haters dude I was there recording you live you were absolutely badass sexy and defintely didnt do a single thing to shame generations of you blood. Take it from one D shaped Dave to another.
My creation has come to life @hellaJeff Or well part of it has. One singular characters who is probably a rando cosplaying as Hella Jeff but still how fucking cool is this. Hi.
https://file.garden/aUjin6psK2beHWDq/deepfry3.jpg
Aw hes jpeg artifacting my posts. Enshittify on my funky freaky asshole.
Be cautious to teach your wooden boy to behave, Geppetto. Teach good manners and even better restraint. We wouldn’t want your prodigal Jeff to wind up a The Killer would we?
Congratulations on being a father. The gift basket should arrive shortly.
Yeah not going to lie it is at least five movies too late for that Rose who liked that one post I made a few hours ago. I mean have you seen any of my movies behave is not what Jeff does and good manners were out the window by the first line of the movie. He also definitely killed someone but kudos on the creepypasta reference.
Im so proud. Hes so hilarious. Man I wish I had thought of doing this first.
What creepypasta? Jeff the Killer really happened. People died, Dave. There were countless bodies. Do they count for nothing just because they were difficult to tally?
Call me D. And yeah I mean yeah pretty much. Thats kinda how counting works. If you cant count them then theyre nothing You said it though not me.
FUCK YOU I POST WHAT I FUCKING WANT !!!! #nsfw #bodilyrestraint #feararousalinterplay #kinkadjacentsensations -> #breathplay/#pressure #kink THERE'S SOMETHING THAT'S BORDERLINE ADDICTIVE WHEN SOMEONE IS SQUEEZING YOU TIGHT. LIKE, AROUND YOUR RIBS, SIDE, SOMETIMES NECK. SAVE YOUR FUCKING JUDGMENT FOR A SECOND. IT FEELS WEIRD PART TERRIFYING FROM HOW EASILY THEY COULD KILL YOU LIKE THAT, BUT THEN ALSO COMFORTING AND IT HAS YOUR MIND ALL FUCKING FUZZY, AND YOU CAN /FEEL/ HOW SICKINGLY WARM YOU ARE. AND YOU'RE SHAKING BECAUSE FUCK YOU'RE REALLY FUCKING WARM AND THEYRE SO FUCKING COLD IN COMPARISON. THE DIFFERENCE IN TEMPERATURE KEEPS SNAPPING YOU BACK TO THE PRESENCE I THINK I'M MORE SO FIXATED ON THE TOUCH IF ANYTHING. JUST HANDS ROAMING AND SQUEEZING AT YOU, KEEPING YOU IN PLACE. YOU CAN TELL JUST FROM HOW THEIR HANDRESTST ON YOU, THEY COULD MANHANDLE YOU AND YOU CAN'T REALLY DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT. ITS ALMOST GROUNDING TO EXPERIENCE IT.
Dude just because it was fate doesnt mean you werent an asshole not to warn me. Dont you know thats manners 101 or did you not get taught that in alien school.
ALTERNIA DIDNT HAVE SCHOOLS TO MY KNOWLEDGE. CRAZY THING D, I KINDA WOULD HAVE DIED IF I WAS AN ACTIVE ALTERIAN MEMBER OF SOCIETY BACK THEN
Nah that doesnt sound crazy at all sounds pretty typical of the whole formic experience from what Ive heard. But got it you didnt even have school so thats why you dont know what manners are or how to turn off the capslock.
YOUR POINT IS STUPID TO ME. I STILL DONT GET HOW I CALLED MYSELF SUBMISSIVE. BOTTOM IM STARTING TO GET BUT /SUBMISSIVE/? #NSFW
I meant the point about not knowing how to undo the caps lock key buy you know what I can help you out with the other bit. Ill quote you and everything where you called yourself out. "JUST HANDS ROAMING AND SQUEEZING AT YOU, KEEPING YOU IN PLACE. YOU CAN TELL JUST FROM HOW THEIR HANDRESTST ON YOU, THEY COULD MANHANDLE YOU AND YOU CAN'T REALLY DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT. ITS ALMOST GROUNDING TO EXPERIENCE IT." See I even kept your caps in place #nsfw #dubcon
I DON'T THINK THAT'S SUBMISSIVE!! SHOW ME THE DIRECT DEFINITION!! ALSO FUCK ME FOR EXPRESSING A LITTLE WANT AND NEED IN A POST #NSFW
https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/460c09c240fa.png If you still cant see how "THEY COULD MANHANDLE YOU AND YOU CAN'T REALLY DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT" qualifies then there is just no hope for you. #nsfw
