♠ hated by @caligulaAqua
A horse walks into the bar. The bartender asks, “Why the long face?” The horse cannot respond because the horse is a horse. It can neither speak or understand. It’s confused by its surroundings. It gallops out, knocking over a few tables on the way. #dadjokes
How Do You Organize A Space Party? . . . You Planet… no, Wait, That’s Astronomy. #dadjoke
What do you call a sheep in the desert? Lost. #dadjokes
Two balloons float in the desert. One says to the other: "Watch out for that cactus" The other responds. "What cactusssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss" #dadjokes
What Do You Call A Fish Who Practices Medicine? A Sturgeon. #dadjoke
The Clam Didn’t Want To Go Out. It Was Feeling A Bit Shellfish. #dadjoke
What’s A Whale’s Favorite Tv Show? . . . Whale Of Fortune. #dadjoke
≈ Ĩ have to say, Ĩ wasn't quite prepared for this sort of pitiful display so soon on my arrival. ≈
It Was Most Definitely Vague Until You Replied. ;)
This Dude Is Fuckin' Fast, Like Damn Dude! Keep Goin'!~ :) #vague #vagueposting
NO DUDE. TRY AGAIN. WE WON’T LAUGH.
So You Get To Hornypost But I Cant Dad Joke Everyone To Death? Rude. #vague #vagueposting #nsfw #violent
:33< im just saying it could be betpurr
TH1S 1S WHY YOU DONT G3T B1TCH3S
Why Do Sharks Never Use Social Media? . . . They’re Afraid Of Getting Caught In The Net. #dadjoke
I'm Not Going To Post Anything Inappropriate, I'm Just Thinking About Doing It. #nsfw
Y3S 1T 1S YOU S41D KYS WH1CH ST4NDS FOR K1SS YOUR S4NDW1CH OBV1OUSLY
:33< i know i just said that to piss mew off
:33< dont listen to eridan k33p up the dad jokes they rule
>>| we need more bone bulges .in feed. #nsfw
Claustrophobia Is The Fear Of Closed Spaces. For Example: I'm Going To The Beer Store And I'm Scared It Will Be Closed. #dadjoke #can #not #be #silenced
༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ ~ ~ i sŌōŌōŌmE77iMeS WōŌōŌōNdEr iF I ShŌōŌōŌuLd rEmŌōŌōŌvE My... SmAlL EmŌōŌōŌ7IgLyPh iN FrŌōŌōŌn7 ŌōŌōŌf mY 7eX7....
Why Did The God Of Thunder Need To Stretch His Legs? He Was A Little Thor. #dadjoke #cantsilenceme #rebel
Some Guy In Red Said The Same Thing. He's Now My Bestie Out Of Pity!~
I Feel Targeted... You Cant Silence Me Though!! #rebel
Went To The Doctor With A Suspicious - Looking Mole. He Said They All Look That Way And I Should Have Left Him In The Garden. #dadjoke
>>| .is violetblood .afraid .of some bulges .at .interweb? that's so cute .and .awful .in both ways
:33< im just a sw33t innocent kitty~ :33< meow meow purr!
:33< whaaat lie??? :33< shitpeta #fightme leijon would nefur lie!
:33< im just a little kitty so sw33t and innocent...
I Once Submitted Ten Puns To A Joke Competition. I Really Thought With That Many, One Was Sure To Win. Sadly, No Pun In Ten Did. #dadjoke
wWw last time i talked about my ancestor on here someone made their wish to fuck hizz dead body very clear so no more #nsfw #gore wWw
i wish s/)me highbl/)/)d dr/)pped their wallet infr/)nt /)f me s/) i can pick it up and run away with it
\ f1nally an er1dan thats talk1ng sense! /
evvery time another ampora says somethin insightful i agree wwith i havve a miniature crisis a faith like no youre not supposed to say anythin i agree wwith youre meant to be objectivvely inferior to me luckily it usually only takes a couple a minutes for another one to come along an speww some dumb shit so i can go back to bein the univverses biggest hater
No one asked yov either, and yet yov were compelled to share. Don't lay svch scorn if yov bind yovr argvments to hypocrisy.
I too think I am a girl sometimes. I am also a girl all the time, bvt some times are inclvded in that.
itd probably be really nice to cuddle a highblood in the summer, right? itd be so hot out and theyd be so cold...>///<
Hey could anyone lend me a hand finding 7 certain gems spread across the lands
HUMAN ANTIPSYCHOTIC MEDICATION IS ACTUALLY HELPFUL. MAYBE I WILL TRY MEDITATING ALSO.
wtf ii left for liike two 2econd2 and everyone'2 freaked out on the tl
;r aww, anD i tHink YourE quitE swEll EriDan, sEE How grEat wE gEt along ;v
;r forEvEr probablY, i will nEvEr lEavE EriDan, ill bE HErE for EvErYtHing, tHougH if You want i can lEt You HavE somE alonE timE on wEEkEnDs witH minor visitations ;v
um?? ur backyard friends??? u better put some respect on uniquas name rn
oh my god evweryone on this wvebsite are fucking pathetic loserass bottoms. THAT EXPLAINS EVERYTHING. #nsfwv
congratulations on bein able to say your name proud a ya buddy
;r EriDan ampora, tonguE Emoji, glancE bulbs Emoji, sEnD cHitt ;v
;r You alrEaDY know wHat mY rEsponsE will bE EriDan ;v
can"t evven come up wwiith an oriigiinal iin2ult.. noww ii"m bored.. yawwnnnnn.. try harder next tiime..
ii don"t thiink ii wwiill actually,, ju2t becau2e iit pii22e2 you off.. =ΣB]
Can y'all 2top 3njoying my po2t2 2o much for a littl3 bit 2o I can hit bigg3r numb3r pl2
cowward can"t tell me 2hiit twwo my face..
ii"m on evveryone"2 choppiin block tell me 2omethiin wwe don"t knoww..
BOOOOOOO!!!!!! http2=ΣB//cdn..iimgche2t..com/fiile2/b8b45569ad55..png
for not gettiin u2 anythiin you get thii2 iin return http2=ΣB//cdn..iimgche2t..com/fiile2/b8b45569ad55..png
http2=ΣB//cdn..iimgche2t..com/fiile2/b8b45569ad55..png
iif you get enough briick2 you can make a wwhole hiivve..
:33< thinking about how meowch i love women <3
also to clarify previous statement moirails are cool and awesome and the pale quadrant is super rad. i just wish the term pity didn't mean something different for us.