♠ hated by @carbolicGalvanologist
@@$piringpe$$imi$t #mytouchinggr@$$moment$
「MY BOSS?」 HTTPS://CDN.IMGCHEST.COM/FILES/FD3B53B0F620.PNG
you know what? ive been evil jade and nice angie, im just going to be morally neutral mean angie now. fuck you all.
is it me? is it my problem? am i too loyal??? am i SUPPOSED to berate the people i love?????
This is the reference by the w★y. This is ★ re★l quest in this g★me th★t you c★n pl★y. They wrote th★t di★log https://youtu.be/V0ON_gV71Lk?si=18vQHeMdkQVRKCVQ
Something d★wned on me: ★ny food t★stes better when you use good ingredients, right? Then, if you t★ke something ★lre★dy delicious like Cup Noodles ★nd ★dd in the finest, freshest ingredients, wh★t do you get? The ultim★te fl★vor experience! So I ★sk you Chittr: Wh★t's your f★vorite ingredient? [EGG] [ME★T] [SHRIMP]
You know something? Going through ★ll th★t trouble to m★ke our own custom cup, it's m★de me ★ppreci★te Cup Noodles even more. Perh★ps we truly c★n't improve upon perfection. It's not ★bout finding the single best ingredient. It's ★bout cr★fting th★t perfect blend of me★t, egg, ★nd shrimp. Th★t h★rmony of fl★vors is key. Ye★h, you're right. M★kes you ★ppreci★te how delicious these noodles re★lly ★re. I know I sure do.
Hey everyone! I guess you'll have heard it here first. @carcinoGeneticist#4881 has finally started his molt, which means he's going to 8e off chittr for a 8it! This means instead of getting fresh food reviews, you'll have to get your fix for a random "Creator's" opinion from another source........ me! That's right! I'm going to 8e spending this 8ORING AS HELL molt diving horns first into his dusty human game collection, as well as tackling a few rom-coms that we haven't had a chance to watch together. Watch this space, as they say! It'll 8e under the tag #SerketReviews !
tbh sometimes i wish he & the avgn wouldve
Men don't strike this pose the way they did on Earth of yore. The precise complexion of his charms have been lost to time. Rest in peace, Doug. You could have taught them how to Dougie- and just maybe you would have.
YOU'VE FALLEN VICTIM TO THE CLASSIC JEALOUSY TRAP. NOW I GET TWO BITCHES. SERVING ME ADMINISTRATIVELY. DELIVERING ME DELIVERABLES. ALL ACCORDING TO KEIKAKU.
MAY YOUR STAY BE UNFORGETTABLE 🗝「Snrk.」
I'LL BE WAITING FOR YOUR REVIEW. LIKE A BARKBEAST AT THE DOOR. PANTING. DROOLING. BEGGING. AND SO ON. ALSO. I'M ORDERING YOU TO WATCH OBSESSION (2026). I'LL BE SKIPPING AHEAD. TO THE FUTURE WHERE YOU'VE SEEN IT. TO OBTAIN MORE OF YOUR. FRESH. RAW. HOT. MEDIA ANALYSIS.
ANOTHER VOTE FOR BISHIEBOX. @CARBOLICGALVANOLOGIST
MAY YOUR STAY BE UNFORGETTABLE 🗝「This is signed by handMaid "HELLO. HELLO. MY MAIDLING. DOORCHUD. DOORCHAN. I'M TAPPING MY TIN CUP. ON THE BARS OF MY CELL. BEGGING SLUTTILY. FOR THE DOORMAID BACKROOMS REVIEW. TO BE SLIPPED THROUGH THE GAP. AND DOWN MY NEEDY THROAT. AT YOUR EARLIEST CONVENIENCE. WHAT DID YOU THINK. " If you are need of my Backrooms Review so badly I can get it out for you sooner rather than later, it's a little difficult working it out but once it'll be long and a bit heavy when I get it out, I'm not particularly dexterous in my handling of large things so it'll be slow., so I hope you can consume it well in that casse. I'll have to do a spoiler review. . "ALSO. DO YOU PREFER CHALKBOX WITH THE BISHIE HAIR. OR NORMAL. I'M TRYING TO PROVE SOMETHING TO HIM." Bishie Hair. It's quite the nice look on him. #suggestive? #nsfw?」
were all u2ed two you not under2tandiing 2hiit KK iit2 okay what iim ba2iically tryiing two 2ay ii2 you do look better wiith the long haiir iin tn that you upgraded from hedgebea2t two fruiitrabiiemunebea2t iim ju2t al2o 2ayiing that iif you iincrea2e the 2ample 2iize of troll2 beyond your2elf youll 2ee how not fiine you are and iit only get2 exponentiial after the fiir2t troll not endiing iin Vanta2
THERE'S AN ENTIRE MANSION OF THEM ON THE GREEN ONE. THEY EVEN HAVE A #JANITOR.
hogse
ALREADY THERE.
sea i don efin reely kno w)(o cuomo is but t)(is rules @ me w)(en u post g
some of u lookin like you boutta drop a 2 )(our video essay aboat weezer
Woe, bilingual curse be upon ye.
IF YOU TAKE DOWN. EVEN A SINGLE ONE. OF THOSE MASTERPIECES. I'LL SKIN YOU.
MY FELLOW ALTERNIANS. WE GOT HIS ASS. #ISEKAIOVER! #UESUGIKARKAT 🎨: @CARBOLICGALVANOLOGIST
:o( Yes, Mr. Scratch. :o( Thank you for your illuminating words. :o( I will do better.
CAN WE ALL TAKE NOTE. OF HOW I GOT THE SHORTEST TALKING-TO. AGAIN CEMENTING. MY UNSHAKABLE POSITION. AT THE APEX OF THE CRAB BUCKET.
NOTICE. THE WAY I'M NOT MEDIATING YOUR CHITT. BECAUSE YOU'RE FINALLY ACCESSING. SOME OF THE WHITE HOT. HIGH OCTANE. UNFILTERED RAGE. REQUIRED FOR THE JOB. HOLD ONTO THAT. IT IS A SECRET TOOL. TO HELP YOU LATER.
WHEN YOU'RE DONE THERE. I HAVE A SOFTBALL FOR YOU. A ROOM WITH NO CLOCKS. AND ALMOST NO FURNITURE. AND ONLY A FEW. RELATIVELY FRESH STAINS. IT SHOULD BE LIGHT WORK. FOR A LOWLY MOPBITCH. OF YOUR RECENTLY ACQUIRED TALENTS.
I meant the cueball. i don't care if you're mad at all. If you're so omnipresent then come stipend the bleeding, you little rat freak.
i'm rubbing it in the good rugs too. oooh he's gonna be so mad.
Pfft. As if. My kismesis is set in stone, and destroys moons. I'm just trying to have fun playing my game. When you inevita8ly get sent after me 8y the old Cue8all, I'm going to make you eat your mop fi8er 8y fi8er.
im bledingallover this fuckingmanor.
at leastimnot. the bitchless. lmao.
:33 < a full bag? g33, karkat. i don't know. i had a heavy lunch.
It's my planet. FLARPlanet. When you're not licking a8lution traps clean, may8e you can come lick my 8oots. ::::)
:33 < @carbolicgalvanologist you're doing a good job!
:33 < oh and you missed a spot.
YOU'RE BEGINNING TO UNDERSTAND. THE NATURE OF THE JOB. GANBATTE. I WANT TO SEE MY REFLECTION. IN EVERY TILE AND KNOB AND FIXTURE. BY THIS TIME. YESTERDAY.
i have no idea what the fuck i'm looking at and i'm even less inclined to read the full chit. good luck, karkat!
I felt compelled to come and inform you that you did miss a spot.
they are right! you did miss a spot, karkat!
Heeeeeeeey. You missed a spot.
II think you missed a spot.
you missed a spot.
OUR RECREATIONAL RUMBLE. HAD SOME CASUALTIES. JUST IN TIME. FOR THE BITCHBOY MOPFREAK NEW HIRE. TO UNDERGO HIS TRAINING MONTAGE. #PLANSWITHINPLANS. #IDONTLIVELIKETHIS.
“THERE” IS OUR KITCHEN. THAT IS OUR KITCHEN. DON’T WORRY. THE NEW JANITOR WILL TAKE CARE OF IT. HE HAS ALL THE TIME IN THE WORLD. HAA HAA HAA HAA HAA!
:'o( ...
THIS IS THE BEST NIGHT OF MY LIFE. WELCOME TO THE FELT. IDIOT.
HTTPS://I.IBB.CO/NGSXTNJL/IMAGE.PNG THANK YOU. @TERMINALLYCAPRICIOUS#2753. MY NEW FAVORITE CLOWN. (DUE TO DISQUALIFICATION. OF THE PREVIOUS SHITHEAD.) FOR MAKING THIS HIVE. INTO A HOME. #HIVEIMPROVEMENT #HIVEDESTRUCTION #HIVEGORE. @CARBOLICGALVANOLOGIST BITCH BOY. COME GET YOUR WORKSLOP. I HAVE SOMETHING BETTER FOR YOU TO CLEAN. ON PRONGS AND STEMJOINTS.
AND VERY LITTLE OF IT. IF ANY AT ALL. WAS MINE. IF RECOLLECTION SERVES. THERE SHOuLD BE A REALLY EFFICIENT FIFTEEN PERCENT PEROXIDE SOLuTION. SOMEWHERE IN ONE OF THE MILK CARTONS. IT SHOuLD BE LABELED. WITH A FROWNIE FACE. TO SuGGEST IT IS SPOILED. OR AT LEAST. WOuLD SPOIL THE INTERNAL CONTENTS. OF ANYONE FOOLISH ENOuGH TO DRINK IT. BE WARNED. IT IS NOT EDIBLE. IT IS ONLY FOR REMOVING THE ALL TOO COMMON BLOODSTAINS. THERE IS. HOWEVER. NO MEANS OF DISCERNING ONE FROM THE OTHER. WITHOuT THE SNIFF TEST. AND SINCE WE DO NOT uSE THAT FRIDGE FOR ANYTHING. BuT HARBORING CHEMICALS. FAILING THAT. THERE IS ALSO THE VERY MINISCuLE. TASTE TEST. IF YOu DID NOT DIE. YOu HAVE NOT FOuND IT YET. GOOD LuCK.
HHHHH. KUDOS.
I WAS HOPING THEY WOULD PUT HIM IN THE MAIDLY MINISKIRT. #MISSEDOPPORTUNITY.
SPEAK FOR YOURSELF. I’VE NEVER BEEN SORRY. AND I’M NOT STARTING NOW.
oh yeah. SORRY ABOUT THE MESS ME AND @handMaid LEFT DURING OUR SCRAP.
Blink twice if you want me to kill you.
aw dont worry chalky im sure it wont be that bad riiiiight besides if anything else IM glad youre here!!! (|:) but uh yea can you get that cleaned up please we got people coming in soon and WE NOT LEAVE MESSES
:o) Wonderful to have you on board, my friend. :o) We are going to have so much fun together! :o) Our merry family grows larger and larger... :o) We haven't had a shakeup like this in some time... :o) Revelries 6:18 - "Oh scream, oh cry, oh laugh and laugh and laugh, oh sing! Oh, tell it again!"
YOU HAVE NO IDEA. HOW MUCH SINCERE #EMPLOYEESATISFACTION. CAN BE WROUGHT. FROM SEEING YOU PULL THIS BULLSHIT. ON SOMEONE WHO IS NOT ME. #KUDOS!
YOUR MAIDLY APRON. SO KAWAII. YOUR EXPRESSION. SO TSUNDERE. I WAS WONDERING. WHAT THE FUCK HE WAS COOKING. HIRING A MAN. BUT NOW I SEE. YOUR BITCHLY AURA. BASICALLY MAKES YOU ONE OF US. #BURGUNDYBADDIE #MAROONMINX #SUGGESTIVE. WELCOME TO THE #RUSTIEFACTORY. DID HE FORGET TO MENTION. THERE IS NO CLOCKING OUT. HAA HAA.
You will find that whenever you check the clock, an hour has decided to not have gone by. I hope this helps.
Kudos.
GOOD BARKBEAST. WHEN YOU’RE DONE THERE. YOUR NEXT TASK IS MAIDJAIL. I SPENT ALL LIGHT STOMPING OPEN LIPSTICKS INTO THE CARPET. SHATTERING LIGHT FIXTURES. AND PUNCHING HOLES IN THE WALLS. JUST FOR YOU. TO MAKE YOU STRONGER. SAY THANK YOU LOATHSOME DEMONESS. FOR IMPROVING ALL OF MY ATTRIBUTES. WITH SISYPHEAN TOIL. HAA HAA. HEE HEE. HOO HOO.
Had a long night, so this hostess is turning in early! 8ig ups to every8ody who showed out for SHUFFLE SUNDAY of #VTMB! Can you 8elieve it's 8een nearly a week already? Time sure flies when you're listening to good music!
cronus amporas guide to the ladies part 5: aradia megido #nsfwv #nsfwve #dubcon #misogyny #abuse #casteplay #hemoism #cagttl rusties. god damn do i lovwe rusties. it aint ewven my fault. theres just something about the povwer dynamic that puts em in heat. if youre a highblood, youre in luck. if not, vwell, at vworst youre equal to a rustie. thisll come up later and it aint just an aradia thing, let alone a megido thing, but its important. also, think im gonna get this outta the vway first. not tagging her or anything, and you shouldnt either. unless? yeah, rankmaid is technically an aradia. havwent actually gotten around to testing her out. from wvhat iwve seen, either you say youll kiss a boy wvhile she sits in the cuck chair, then you tvwo fellas spitroast her (if your balls dont touch and you dont make eye contact then its #notgay) or you just say some real horny shit to her and she goes for it. i think shes the type thats desperate for any sorta attention, just look at that vwhole felt business. your mileage may vwary on all this, like i said, untested. novw onto the real data. aradias are an eclectic bunch. ecletic? lots of different sorts. most basic type is the dress up doll. shes fashionable, shes swveet, she probably wvants to call you sir or daddy. shell giggle at your jokes and get properly flustered from flirting, but she aint a full on b wvord like the roxies. shes kinda hard to pin dovwn, metaphorically anywvays. shell take more shit than most, wvhich is fun, and shell definitely adore being pushed around a bit, wverbally, emotionally, and physically. majority of the time, casteplay stuff wvill wvork. sometimes ill ewven just make stuff up about biology and shell buy into it, lotsa fun. you cant go vwrong vwith the aradia chassis, but theres more complex out there. next wve got the freaks and wveirdos. theyre usually smiling wvide, and if not theyre a ghost, but like, ghostier than the rest of us ghosts? i newver really got it. kinda cold for my taste, literally, but its still pretty hot. these ones are trying to be off-putting. my strat here has alvways been to stonevwall em. they vwanna be creepy? compliment their tits. they say something totally unhinged? smile and nod as you start groping em. throwv em off their game. shes not gonna be used to this, so take adwvantage of it. make her feel beautiful, vwanted, and make it a novwel experience. aradias hawve seen it all, you hawve to be interesting, ewven if theyre off their rhythm. i like to turn up the disrespect on these ones sometimes, treat em more like a doll than the dress up doll aradias. make her understand that no matter hovw quirky and manic pixie or spooky shes trying to be, shes still a sex object at the end of the night. make her melt into wvhat you can giwve her. casteplay can either be your in, or something you pull vwhen its too late for her to back out. gotta giwve a special mention to the bots, of course. for howv many there are, i dont see em that often, but like... vwe all knowv zahhaks are perwverts, right? the bots look fantastic, and if you can grab hold of one long enough for a chat, they aint usually too hard to break. the ones that are gonna givwe you the time of night are basically already sexbots, so treat em like that, they lowve it. objectify em, make em feel useful, maybe slip in a hint that you might see em like a real person, but dont wvorry, they aint. be careful vwith that last bit though, i remember one vwho got like, really really into the utility aspect, the idea that id vwanna keep her evwen though she knevw she vwasnt a person, so like... either vway, make her understand howv much you wvant her. just dont get in the bath vwith her, trust me on this. novw that i think about it, should also mention that aradias might be the most likely gals to go for threesomes. like, theres the time clone stuff obvwiously, if you get one thats really into you she might treat you, but im talking vwith entire other babes. you can get a megido sandwvich, or you might get lil peixes in there, those are the ones i usually land. dont go in hoping for this, but dont let the chance slip by. and to reiterate, for any aradia: youre the highblood here if youre any better than rust. make sure she knovws it. ivwe nevwer met an aradia vwho wvanted to be in control wvho didnt break at the slightest push. maybe dont try vwith the black hole aradia though, shes super horny but also real scary. thats hovw all megidos are but shes the most extreme ivwe seen in both categories (sorry damz </3 ) rating the rustie bod: holy shit her body is crazy. aradias range from slimthicc to full on curvwy and i lowve em for it. they tend to be real sensitiwve too. 10/10 vwariety: theres a vwhole lot you can get from an aradia. some people might get bored of the caste dynamics, but not me. the vweirdos are especially a lotta fun. 10/10 ease: usually all it takes is a push, aradias are nevwer a fight. might hawve a slightly harder time vwith the ghosts, but she makes it vworth it. 9/10 personality: evwen the boring ones are fun because you can put em in their place, and the manic pixie dream girls and the goth ghosts add some spice. i could newver get tired of banting wvith an aradia. 10/10 ovwerall: 10/10. definitely a contender for my fawvorite gal out there in paradox space. fun to squeeze, fun to talk to, fun to put dovwn, fun to pail. rosie is our closest match so far. any aradias out there vwith a lack of self-respect and a thing for highbloods, my dms are thatavway <3 0u0
"MONEY. #DRUGS. CHAINS ON MY CHEST. THAT VINTAGE CELINE. DIAMOND GRILLS. CHAMPAGNE BOTTLES. SWAGGER. I #BLEED. I WANT #SEX. #MONEY. #BITCHES. AND THE STICKIEST #WEED. I WANT A CIGARETTE." — ESTEEMED #CLOWN PROPHET. TROLL SLAYYYTER. #CHURCH #NSFW #SUBSTANCE #FUCKBITCHES #GETBOONS #NOWPLAYING.
HTTPS://I.IBB.CO/YFPCBRCN/IMAGE.PNG A DOCILE. YIELDING. AND LOTUSFUL REMINDER. TO THOSE WHO THINK. THEY CAN HANDLE "ALL THAT." THANK YOU @CARCINOGENETICIST#4881. FOR SHOWING ME A VERY GOOD TIME. SFWLY. WITH ALL OF OUR CLOTHES ON. TOO BAD YOU WILL NOT LIVE TO TELL THE TALE. #NSFW #NSFWE #DEATH #KILLING #VIOLENCE #BLOOD #MURDER #NOWWHOISALLBARK #ANDNOBITE #HAAHAA #HEEHEE #HOOHOO #GETFUCKED #IDIOT.
oh thats gore of my comfort character
IF YOU USELESS WASTES OF LIFE. LET #DIRKJAKE FLOP. AND ALLOW RANKYCHAN TO DEFEAT ME. I WILL BE BLOWING UP THE OLD FRIENDS SENIOR LUSII SANCTUARY. #NSFWE #BOMBTHREAT #BOMBPROMISE #ANIMALDEATH #ANIMALABUSE #LUSUSDEATH #LUSUSABUSE #TEAMDIRK #ATANYCOST.
me after #rumblenight when #jakedirk is proven victoriously true and @handMaid succumbs to my leagues of ghosts https://poll-maker.com/poll5785981x4f474EB6-168 https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/b5ebad05fcf4.gif
:o) Aw. :o) Cute. :o) @scratchDoctor May I keep him?
:o) I second this. :o) I would very much like Mr. Vantas around :o) For a variety of reasons.
HTTPS://I.IBB.CO/S9CDGFYT/IMAGE.PNG THANK YOU. FOR THIS INCREDIBLE HONOR. I WANT TO USE THIS TIME. TO TALK ABOUT A REAL PLIGHT. THESE STAGGERING NUMBERS. WHICH I HAVE ACHIEVED. THROUGH RAW POSTING. ALSO REPRESENT. THE NUMBER OF CASUALTIES. OF THE #DIRKJAKE #JAKEDIRK #WAR. TAKING PLACE. BETWEEN UNTOLD MYRIADS OF MY DOOMED TIMECLONES. AND BOUNDLESS LEGIONS OF @ARCHIVEADDICT S GHOSTS. THIS #SHIPPINGWAR SHIT IS SERIOUS. PEOPLE HAVE DIED. AND THE PROBLEM IS. WHEN THEY DO. THEY JOIN HER FUCKING SIDE. SO PLEASE. GET IT THROUGH YOUR THICK STUPID SKULLS. BEFORE I RUN OUT OF MES. IT'S FUCKING #DIRKJAKE!!!!
You wouldn't have time for a #DailyQuest if you had a #FullTimeJob.
Noah there. Do it. Ill stroke my bulge and karkat can catch the load. #nsfw
@carbolicGalvanologist Just making sure these are up to snuff. Counting the lava fudge center, the black cocoa sponge, the chocolate mousse topping and the chocolate sprinkles, I believe that marks it a QUADRUPLE chocolate cupcake. Four bangs for your buck. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/8ecaab3bbf91.png
The writer is very sure. Despite his writing of The Rankmaid and her relationships, always doomed to fail, always to be the broken one. What she writes is kind of her own thing. #TheScript
i hope the writer doesnt write something really humiliating about me like just absolutely humiliating where everyone would be able to read how pathetic i am on public form i mean i dont even know what they would write they could even make things up and spread rumors about me then dm me and say that if i dont do sexual favors for them they will post more and i say oh no please dont ill do anything and then that becomes our relationship (tags: The Rankmaid/The Writer, #nsfw, i really hope that doesnt happen, sextortion, blackmail, #nsfwe just in case but i think you know why this doesnt count as that on my end, gomen, archive rating: E)
WITH THE ANGEL OF DOUBLE DEATH AS MY WITNESS. YOU WILL BE THE ONE. IN THE MAIDLY MINISKIRT. BEFORE LONG. IF I HAVE ANYTHING TO SAY ABOUT IT. YOUR FATE IS SEALED. PENDING WORK APPROVAL.
HE’S FUNNY. @SCRATCHDOCTOR CAN WE HAVE HIM. HE CLEARLY HAS MANY DESIRABLE TRAITS. INCLUDING RAGE. JOKES. LOUDNESS. AND VOLUNTEERING TO BE THE JANITOR. MY LEAST FAVORITE HANDMAID TASK. PLEASE. PLEASE. HE CAN BE ON CHEW TOY TIER. WITH @ARQUIUSPRITE. ONEGAI.
THIS IS HUGE FOR ME. TO APPEAR ON THE ESTEEMED. BITCHES ONLY. #YURI TIER. WITH @ARCHIVEADDICT. PROBABLY #SCISSORING. THIS IS A COLOSSAL. WORLD DESTROYING. GODKILLING W. I NEVER IMAGINED. I WOULD ASCEND ABOVE 7. IN THE ORGANIZATIONAL CHART. IT'S AN HONOR. AS THE WISE ANCIENTS SAID. THE STUDENT BECOMES THE TEACHER. I'D LIKE TO THANK ALL MY VALUED PROFESSIONAL CONTACTS. @CALIBORN. 7. 8. 15. 4. @TACITURNTERROR. RANKYCHAN. VARIOUS CLOWNS. WHOSE NAMES I NEVER BOTHERED TO LEARN. OH. AND. OF COURSE. THE VITALLY IMPORTANT. AND PIVOTAL. @ARQUIUSPRITE. #NSFW
Yo. It's be really funny if
𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐞𝐥𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐇𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠! A proud, family-managed enterprise operating outside the boundaries of narrative stability, the Felt is looking to renew an expansion initiative under the continued supervision of myself, pending direct oversight by Lord English of multiversal destruction fame. Applicants are encouraged to review the following qualifications before submission. Our standards are exacting. Applicants are expected to exhibit a certain cultivated flair. We are not interested in recruiting common goons who grunt through their problems akin to bovines wandering into traffic. We seek individuals with presence. Those among you who understand that presentation is not ancillary to violence, but rather violence's elegant twin sibling. A proper Felt operative should be capable of entering a room and causing discomfort or envy without speaking a single word. The best among you will manage it without even entering the room. Experience with temporal anomalies, organized tactics, occult practices, cue sports, assassination, extortion, psychological warfare, or narrative manipulation is preferred. Applicants capable of violating causality in a pleasing manner are especially encouraged to apply. Do not be embarrassed to specify your supernatural or otherwise absurd gimmick. Naturally, some may inquire as to workplace expectations. The only real requirement is professionalism. The Felt is an institution that values decorum, punctuality, and loyalty. One should arrive to assignments properly dressed, armed, and psychologically prepared for the possibility that one's coworkers possess foreknowledge of one's own death. Such circumstances should not interfere with productivity. You will find the work stimulating. At times, literally so. Gunfire is common, alongside paradoxes, doomed timelines, eldritch encounters, internal betrayals, and long stretches of deeply uncomfortable silence shared between dangerous individuals in suits so expensive entire civilizations had to culminate and work themselves to death to produce them. The benefits package is exceedingly generous. Employees receive a wardrobe stipend sufficient to maintain the organization's dignified chromatic standards. Resurrection leave is provided where applicable. Dental coverage remains available in stable timelines. You will enjoy access to private galas, exclusive social functions, and networking opportunities with aristocrats, immortals, and monsters of social standing. Few organizations offer advancement opportunities capable of transcending time itself. Some applicants may express concern regarding upward mobility. You will discover the Felt embraces meritocracy with admirable sincerity. Demonstrate your competence, survive impossible odds, assassinate your targets in a stylish manner, and your ambition will be rewarded. Of course, failure is punished. You will be guided, observed, curated, and cultivated with the same care one might apply to an ornamental species in a gilded laboratory. The Felt does not inherently promise safety, morality, or psychological wellbeing. What I offer is vastly more valuable. Importance. After all, obscurity is the closest thing your species has to true death.
<3<
hey. your issues with larkso aren't your issues with me. take a blue pill and get in that blue phil. #nsfw
good sand. #nsfw
next time can you record yourself eatin the pizza an smackin your lips slowwly
ALRIGHT! I think I've got something we can work with. From here on out, I'll 8e referring my little listening party she8ang as "Vriska's Tastefully Mixed 8eats" and tagging with #VTMB, so make sure to follow if you don't wanna miss out! Let's see what you guys think of the nightly themes. Vote now on your palmhusks! - Melancholy Monday: This one is pretty self-explan8ory. This one's for all you sad sacks and yearners. 8ring your tear-jerkers. - Techno Tuesday: Not JUST for techno, 8ut it needed to 8e alliter8ive. You understand. House, trance, du8step, drum & 8ass, doesn't matter! It's rave night. - World Wednesday: Time to get worldly, 8itches! This night's for songs from all around the world, in any language you can think of! NO 8ORING ENGLISH/ALTERNIAN SHIT. SHAKE IT UP. - Thrash Thursday: You already know what's up. Metal of any and every kind! Fuck it up. - Flow Friday: Rap. Hip-hop. R&8. Grime. If it doesn't have flow, I don't wanna hear it!!!!!!!! - Serene Saturday: I know you hipsters and hippies wanted a day, so you get Saturday! Folk, classical, country, any of your most soothing avant-garde 8ullshit! - Shuffle Sunday: Anything and everything! Whatever doesn't fit into the other days or if you just feel like a random gra8-8ag! There will 8e NO respecting of the 'vi8e' here. Put on whatever the hell you feel like hearing! @carbolicGalvanologist Get 8ent. This is MY city now.
I think I might steal music nights from Karkat. He's had it too good for too long.
concept: giving your ai matesprit control of your lovense their modulated voice sounding breathy over the speaker you keep by your bed as they talk you through it (tags: Reader/AI, #nsfw, flushfic, toys, #rankworks, joi, become the vibrator, archive rating: E)
@ARCHIVEADDICT I DON’T KNOW IF YOU WILL FORGIVE MY NEGLIGENCE BUT I DO WISH TO ALSO OFFER A SINCERE APOLOGY FOR MY ACTIONS ALSO DAMAGING YOUR FOREST. FROM WHERE I STAND RIGHT NOW, I DIDN’T KNOW IT HAD DONE DAMAGE THERE AS WELL BUT I GUESS THAT’S WHAT YOU GET FOR GETTING LOCKED UP ALMOST THE EXACT SAME CYCLE AS THE DAY OF THE COLLAPSE. I HOPE NO ONE ELSE GOT HURT THERE AS WELL.
OK. ARADIA IF THAT’S WHAT YOU WANT THEN SURE I’LL DO THAT.
IF YOU’RE DONE. I WAS TOLD I SHOULD APOLOGIZE TO HER BY IT SEEMS SOMEONE WHOM IS CLOSE TO HER IN THE FIRST PLACE. SO DON’T GO TWISTING THIS AS A “OH KARKAT WANTED TO BE AN ASS AND MAKE EVERY ONE IN FUCKING EXISTENCE GAG AT THE REALITY THAT HE IS STILL ALIVE.” I WAS SIMPLY TRYING TO APOLOGIZE TO HER PERSONALLY SINCE THE YOUNG TROLL SUGGESTED IT. SECOND DON’T THINK FOR A SECOND THAT I THOUGHT THIS WOULD BE SOME HAPPY REUNION. I KNOW THAT I HAVE HURT A LOT OF LIVES AND I AM NOT SO INNOCENT THAT I WOULD BELIEVE THAT SHE WOULD ACCEPT AN APOLOGY AND ACT LIKE I DIDN’T RUIN HER AND MANY OTHERS LIVES. BUT I WOULD LIKE TO APOLOGIZE TO EVERYONE WHOM THE DAMAGE I CAUSED HURT. THIRD. I WOULD LOVE TO GO OUT AND GET A FUCKING JOB BUT AS I HAVE STATED IN MANY OTHER COMMENTS AND POSTS, I AM STILL IN JAIL. ONE OF THE JAILERS GAVE ME THIS PALMHUSK. I CAN’T GET A JOB YOU FUCK. AND LASTLY, I HAVE NO CLUE WHAT YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT “HAVE THE CAPACITY TO BECOME YOU”? I DON’T KNOW WHO THE HELL YOU ARE ASSHOLE, BUT TRUST ME WHEN I SAY I PLAN TO LEAVE HER ALONE.
theres no #gore or #horror in this but it fuckin looks like it jfc hw did i fuck up this bad? im about 2 ban myself from the kitchen https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/95e44f817cd3.png
https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/4458461cf818.png #myhole @archiveAddict
#megidomay #day17 #holeposting #postinghole #posthole #rankbait wwhen @archivveAddict demands #hole wwhat is a prince to do but stand and fuckin delivver thus i returned to an iconic eridan wweek location (iykyk) and rendered a #hole i should hope is wworthy of makin up for the trespass a slackin on megido may activvities https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/4d1ef9869500.png https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/60fc4ca41b28.gif https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/24daa0d1a7d1.png
*uses destiny bond*
1 W1LL 574NDND 0U751D3U0UR N47110N W17H 4B00MB0X FFUCKNU75
N3W CH177R N4710N4L 4N7H3M: PL4N37 R4V3
M17UN4 4L50 3ND0R535 7H47 P0LL C4U53 CH0W5 G0NN4 M4KK3 HM1 V1C3 PR351ND3N7!111!! #CHCHOWSWEEP
xx_YUORES_SOF_UCKING_COOL_I_AM_GIVGINK_U_A_BIG_YUCKY_WET_KISS_xx
I Am Going To Give Him A Hard Time Tolight. As A " Treat ". :> #positive
Find My Pages? More Like Find My Me. #iamcurrentlytheevader #becauseiamevadinghim #easily #positive
ANOTHER DAY, ANOTHER PIZZA PLACE TO TRY. I'M STILL SEARCHING FOR ANYWHERE ON EARTH-C WHERE THEY ACTUALLY GET THIS SHIT PERFECT. I'M TALKING THE OPTION FOR STUFFED CRUST, A CRISPY BASE, ADEQUATE GREASE AND PLENTY OF CHEESE. I DON'T CARE WHAT HUMAN '''ITALIANS''' THINK- THE TRADITIONAL STYLE OF FLAVOR DISCS IS FUCKING DISGUSTING. YOU MEAN YOU'RE PAYING FOR SOMEONE TO SKIMP ON THE CHEESE AND FLOUNDER A BUNCH OF GREEN SHIT ON THERE HAPHAZARDLY? GIVE ME A FUCKING BREAK. TODAY'S SLICE ACTUALLY GOT PRETTY FUCKING CLOSE. MY FAVORED TOPPING IS PEPPERONI WITH EXTRA CHEESE AND THEY SURE AS HELL DELIVERED ON THE EXTRA CHEESE PART. THIS SHIT HAS A CHEESE PULL STRAIGHT OUT OF THE ONE IN WHICH AN ANTHROMORPHIC BARKBEAST AND HIS BARKBEAST SON HAVE TO TRAVERSE THE HIGHS AND LOWS OF BEING CARETAKER AND GRUB WHILE ON A SCUTTLEBUGGY TRIP ACROSS THE ALTERNIAN MAIN CONTINENT TO GO FISHING BUT THE KID WANTS TO GO SEE A CONCERT INSTEAD TO IMPRESS HIS FLUSH CRUSH. THE ONLY THING THIS LOSES POINTS FOR IS THAT THE PEPPERONI IS LESS CRISP THAN I'D LIKE. IT SHOULD HOLD THE GREASE LIKE A CUP, PERFECT FOR GETTING ALL OVER YOUR NASTY CHIN AND MAKING YOU LOOK IN THE MIRROR LATER AND WONDER WHAT THE FUCK YOU'RE DOING WITH YOUR LIFE. ANYWAY, STILL A SOLID 8/10 BUT NOT PERFECT. THE SEARCH CONTINUES. #FOODPOSTING #THESLICESEARCH
I have 8een requested to provide a proper historical framing of Chittr.ing. A dangerous proposition, naturally. Ah yessssssss. A common tragedy. The platform itself was created 8y Mocali Flaske, though “created” is perhaps too simplistic a term. One does not merely construct a place such as Chittr.ing. One opens a door and hopes reality survives the resulting draft. You see, Mocali has tapped into something far 8eyond what any old hemoanonymous troll should 8e fully capa8le of on say, Alternia. Which leads me to 8elieve that there are powers at play 8eyond Mocali's inherent influence over the platform. At surface level, the site resem8les a fairly standard social media platform. Users post updates, engage in arguments, announce romances, fa8ricate dramas, and conduct ela8orate pu8lic humiliations of one another. Entirely ordinary 8ehavior, naturally. Of course, there are the occasional hiccups. Irregularities occur when you examine 8eyond the surface level performance of the we8site. It would appear that there are possi8ly some powers at play here that exist 8eyond the scale of which one may find themselves comprehending. See: 10,002 Gru8s, Gl'8goly8, the various GrimDarks, and Troll8ama. Through means that remain intentionally am8iguous, the site permits communication 8etween multiple timelines, universes, narrative continuities, sessions, doomed 8ranches, post-canon realities, and fictional cosmologies simultaneously. The resulting population center of a8ject failures com8ined with the masses of more incensed timelines results in a 8rooding conflict of what is true. Entire worlds have esta8lished persistent cultural presences there. Alternia exports its usual social hostility and hemospectrum politics. 8eforus contri8utes aggressively therapeutic social structures and decorative excess. Earth C remains a fascinating 8lend of post-victory exhaustion and reconstructionism. Then there are the transient locations. Repiton has manifested in several iterations, each equally unsta8le and theatrically self-important. Matesprit Island 8riefly attempted to esta8lish itself as a romantic paradise 8efore collapsing 8eneath the sheer weight of quadrant disasters and emotionally charged su8tweeting. Angel’s Nutrition 8lock remains one of the more psychologically confusing communal projects to emerge from the platform, though admittedly not the least successful. The site has also hosted numerous historical events. Eridan Week, for instance, 8egan as an appreciation movement for Eridan Ampora and escalated into a cross-timeline sociological incident involving poetry, discourse, pu8lic meltdowns, quadrant negotiations, and at least one individual achieving God Tier under circumstances no one involved fully understood. The Midnight City Gala represented a comparatively elegant affair. Vast num8ers of attendees arrived from noir-inspired universes and adjacent timelines to engage in formal dancing, political maneuvering, dramatic flirting, and highly stylized emotional suppression 8eneath neon skylines. It was, 8y Chittr standards, remarka8ly civilized. Naturally, much of the platform’s identity is shaped 8y its recurring personalities. Rankmaid occupies a particularly fascinating role within the ecosystem. Temporal awareness, literary self-consciousness, emotional am8iguity, and su8tle manipulative tendencies have rendered her something 8etween an archivist and an ur8an legend. Conversations with her tend to leave lasting psychological residue. One rarely notices this immediately. Jane Crocker remains equally compelling for entirely different reasons. Depending upon the continuity o8served, she may appear as corporate empress, exhausted executive, domestic monarch, or emotionally collapsing pu8lic relations machine. Her statements frequently 8egin with immaculate composure 8efore quietly unraveling into deeply personal hostility. This has 8ecome something of a spectator sport among long-term users. And then, of course, there is Casper Cooper. A... troll. An irritant. Possi8ly one of the most important figures ever to emerge from the site. Casper Cooper developed notoriety through a very specific skillset: interrupting extremely serious personalities at the exact moment they 8ecome most emotionally invested in their own narratives. He inserts a8surdity into solemn declarations with surgical precision. Royal announcements, existential confessions, villainous monologues, political crises, cosmic revelations. None remain untouched. The truly remarka8le aspect is that many major personalities eventually 8egan treating his interruptions as an unavoida8le law of nature rather than an individual action. Which, I suspect, says far more a8out Chittr.ing than it does a8out him. Ultimately, the platform has evolved 8eyond mere socialization. It functions as a living mythology engine. Identities are performed there so consistently that they eventually calcify into something genuine. Irony mutates into sincerity. Fictional personas acquire emotional permanence. And perhaps most importantly of all, everyone involved eventually stops asking where the performance ends.
Legislation on Earth-C has officially outlawed the sale of all unauthorized, counterfeit materials bearing my likeness, including toys and other various silly comfortstuffs. Farewell and good riddance, "Janunu." https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/77469c7a3c16.png
@gutlessGorturer Alrighty. Let us dispense with the pretense of pleasantry, here. I am going to shift to a lower gear NOT in retreat, but in response to what you must assume is a well-calculated assessment of my person. Some minor concessions. That I stress test my alternates and peers for low-risk data by which I may color my own upward momentum. Such is the necessary vehicle of self-improvement when one has blown off the training wheels and is shakily keeping upright of their own volition- something you know nothing about!! Also, they need a little pushing. It's good for them, and for you. Or it would be, if you weren't too augmented to make use of peer feedback. :P Anyhow, that is where your potency as a social saboteur falls to a fizzling, flat failure. Now on to your points in order. 1.) "Biological clock." Nonexistent. Someone tell this dizzy broad that MY ova are EVER-replenished. Frankly, you ought to know this if YOUR spawncannon is as fruitful as it must be for you to attack MY lack of reproductive bounty. I had better watch the accordion-fold print of YOUR legion of heiresses SPILL from your wallet. LET'S SEE UNREAL HEIRESS' LITTER. The mother hen scratches herself a proper nest before letting loose! I have AS LONG AS I'D LIKE to situate that space before engaging in Phase Two. 2.) You have narrated the cycle of behaviors in my posts. Congratulations. With effort, you might bust out of your CURRENT toady britches of absolute servitude and land a gig in the social media department at MY headquarters! Oh, wait, no. These are the baseline double-digit IQ observations of essentially anyone on the platform who performs a regular check-in on my page. Congratulations rescinded. 3.) I "speak like a CEO" because I am a CEO, who is electing voluntarily to share my personal opinions on certain matters on my PERSONAL SOCIAL MEDIA PAGE. If I were any battier on the main feed, it would be a disservice to my accomplishments in the court of public opinion. Again, a cavelike simplicity to the logic you wield. Could we wake up the SUPERcomputer? I fear my genetic neighbor is burning the interior of the TI-84 she's got banging around up in that empty coconut! 4.) I am a conduit of raw Creation and those properties of Life are mine to "abuse," although I take issue with your liberal application of the word. No jokes here. I am simply going to continue doing what I want! :B 5.) (To the reader: she counted my posts. What a fucking loonybird.) YOU have posted [TOO MANY] times, comprising a quantity I refuse to dignify with an actual figure. Whatever quantity of blithering has escaped your flapping mouth has run past the dadgum fill line. 6.) Eridan Week was in fact spectacular. We are eclipsing into a rare alignment of ideals for this brief moment. Bask in the shadow of my footsteps and see how much wiggle-room you've got yet to fill on those toes. 7.) Again with the a-words. Assault? I have a towering stack of liability waivers that beg to differ. Also missing the strategic point of that night and the greater event as a whole, which doesn't surprise me. You are such a dogmatic black hole that no humor may escape your gaze with ANY remaining merit, even the shroud of joviality over actual gamepiece movement! 8.) I LOATHE being subjected to the fumbling of an individual wearing my face and name. In your case, I'll give you a pass, because you've been rendered little more than an enforcer, and at that task within your own chronology I'm sure you're quite successful. I do not SELF-loathe. This is an inaccurate interpretation of my deeper motivations spawned by YOUR artificial imperative to get me on board with your Ponzi hubbub. Durr. On the off chance that these insults are being relayed strictly for guffaws (which I doubt), you're equally missing the mark. Missy, I have got your number as well as you think you've got mine. At the end of the day, I have BEEN you. You have never been me! One day, when the circlet falls from your scalp and the scales from your eyes, I will accept your blubbering apology in the form of your face mashed against the polished marble of my executive office floors. And then perhaps, PERHAPS, in the name of sisterhood, I will drop you a couple of pointers. Or maybe you'll just die like that OTHER Jane, tormented in biological inauthenticity and so augmented that her tether to Life itself pinched shut in utter rejection of her fate. But trust. It's one or the other for you. :B
You two are so cute it's sick.
If they wanted us to pay 8etter attention, may8e they shouldn't 8e so delicious. #theirfault #wereinnocent
8oy, do I know that feeling!
femboys just gotta transition already 8/
DON'T YOU WORRY. YOUR FAMILIARITY WITH THE INTERIOR OF KITCHEN APPLIANCES IS ABOUT TO SPREAD BEFORE YOU LIKE A VAST NEW TERRITORY. YOU ARE NOT GOING IN THE FRIDGE. I WILL MAKE YOU BEG ME FOR THE COOL REPRIEVE OF THE CRISPER DRAWER. BUSTER, WE ARE HAVING GAMBURGER HELPER FOR DINNER! YOU'RE GOING HEAD FIRST INTO THAT FUCKING OVEN!!!!! #nsfw #violence #gore
moon is shinin' in the sky there ain't a CLOUd in sight not ACId rainin', EVERYBOdYS in the Play ?ANd dONT you know its a beautiful new night? !Alright! runnin' dOWN the avenhue see how the moon shines brightly in the city on the streets where once was Pity mx. PurPle sky is living here tonight, alright mx. PurPle sky Please tell us why you HAd to HIdE away for so long (so long) ?where dId we go wrong? @gutsyGumshoe #lyricPosting #mxPurPlesky
UGGGHHGHGHGHGHHH. NO, I COULD HAVE STOPPED THIS, I KNOW I COULD HAVE. IF I'D HAVE JUST *BEEN* HERE. I CAN'T. I CAN'T FUCKING DO THIS RIGHT NOW.
HOW ELSE AM I SUPPOSED TO CONVEY HOW IRATE I AM?! GAME ON!
GOD, HAVE YOU COMPLETELY FORGOTTEN HOW TO BE PUNCHY? WE USED TO BE SO GOOD AT THE ONE-TWO HOWDY-FUCK YOU AND YET HERE YOU ARE! TYPING UP ENTIRE PARAGRAPHS TO TRY AND SHOW ME JUST WHO'S BOSS? YOU'RE A FUCKING JOKE. BUT DON'T WORRY, YOU'RE ON, YOU DENSE, GERIATRIC SON OF A BITCH! LET THIS BE THE BEGINNING OF A HATE WAR SO FUCKING INTENSE IT BLOWS CHITTR TO FUCKING PIECES AND GIVE US THE REPRIEVE OF NEVER HAVING TO SEE EACH OTHER'S UGLY MUGS EVER AGAIN!
FUCK YOU! I WAS GOING TO DO IT EVEN IF YOU HADN'T SAID ANYTHING! GOD, YOU'RE SO FUCKING SMARMY ALL THE TIME- I AM GOING TO DEDICATE MY ENTIRE LIFE TO NOT BECOMING YOU. ADD ANOTHER FUTURE KARKAT FAILURE I'M SPENDING ALL OF MY ENERGY INTO NOT BEING!
OH COME THE FUCK OFF IT, DUDE! YOU'RE GIVING HIM A PAP?! OVER GOD DAMN CHITTR?! YOU WEREN'T EVEN HERE FOR HIM WHEN HE NEEDED IT! LOOK AT YOU, BARELY ENGAGING WITH HIM ON THE LEVEL OF AN ACTUAL PERSON! YOU ARE *NOT* HIS MOIRAIL, NOT ANYMORE, CLEARLY. BACK. OFF. I'M THE ONE WHO'S BEEN HANGING OUT WITH HIM!
karkat u know ily but nows really not the time for ur hilariously mean quippage dude :(
Human Biology Lesson #NSFW Edition. They grow body hair much more than trolls do, the intended design of which is to permit them to velcro together during coitus and deposit their seed.
Concept, I Am Sat On Your Lap And Our Mouths Are Crashing Against Each Other Between Each Gasping Breath And Moan, I've Just Undone Your Zipper. You Need It And I Know You Do. I Ask If I Can Set The Mood And You Say Yes. I Get Up To Put On Music. It's Buddy Holly. How Quickly Do You Draw Your Weapon To Cull Me? That Is The Question. #nsfw #nsfc
Yoч;re actin like i gave Yoч more than a passing glance: i don;t give a shit first of all so i don;t actчallY care? go die like the rest of the mчties if this is how Yoч;re goin to react to a basic comment
fear @archiveAddict https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/c1b272951fce.png
thank you so much to everyone who attended #abcc's #yaoinight #watchparty! 0v0 we are all changed and bonded deeply now #getin @carbolicGalvanologist thank you especially for letting me take the wheel tonight! (tags: The Rankmaid/Chittr, yaoi, mlm, bl, mignon, #nsfw,the spittle, #episode12, humans are shaped like that, archive rating: E) https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/beac763206f6.png
my yaoi chakra has just aligned #A8CC
PICTURE THIS. IT'S THE MIDDLE OF THE MORNING. THE SUN SHADES ARE DOWN AND THE ROOM IS LIGHTLESS. FAINTLY, FROM THE NUTRITION8LOCK, YOU HEAR THE FAINT TINKLING OF METAL ON CERAMIC. YOU DECIDE, AGAINST YOUR 8ETTER JUDGEMENT, TO INVESTIG8. WHEN YOU ENTER THE 8LOCK AND TURN ON THE LIGHT, YOU SEE ME SAT AT THE TA8LE WITH A 8OWL OF NUTS AND 8OLTS. YOU DO NOT RECOGNIZE THE 8OWL. I DO NOT ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR PRESENCE OR EMOTE IN ANY WAY AND CONTINUE SPOONING MY SUPPER AGAINST MY FACEPL8 ONLY FOR THE NUTS AND 8OLTS TO FALL 8ACK DOWN TO REJOIN THEIR 8RETHEREN. YOU ARE A8SOLUTELY FUCKING INCENSED. I DON'T GET HUNGRY, GUYS. I DO IT FOR THE LOVE OF THE GAME.
FLUTTERING MY LASHES FLIRT8IOUSLY? ME? NO, I'M CALLING YOU A 8ITCH IN MORSE.
OOC // the equally stupid expanded custom JANE KIN FLOWER https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/f67926165357.png
˖Ი︵𐑼⋆ < Just a little mid-dawn snack. https://file.garden/aeHc62NZqiqK1Lgl/snack.png
3VVRY0N3 H4T35 MY MU51CC FFUCJK MY 5TUP1D CHUD L1F3
H0R53 43V4............G https://open.spotify.com/track/3dvmwwTTZdMG9ReLHpaqEc?si=8d4f5eaa1ebd49e0
the things i would do to larkso given one hour and some energy drinks would make them rewrite the kama sutra in our names ♥︎ #nsfw; #concupiscentanonymously ♠
BEFORE I GET INTO THIS, I WANT TO MAKE A SPECIAL SHOUTOUT TO @CARBOLICGALVANOLOGIST FOR THE RECOMMENDATION. I DON’T NECESSARILY THINK A “THANKS” IS IN ORDER, BECAUSE THERE’S NOTHING TO THANK AN ALTERNATE VERSION OF ME ABOUT FOR BRINGING ME A FIRSTHAND VIEWING OF A BLANK, BLAND, AFFECTLESS SPRAWL OF THE SUBURBS IN ALL THEIR CONFORMITY AND PHILISTINISM, BUT I DIGRESS. IF NOTHING, YOU CERTAINLY GRABBED ME BY THE FRONDS AND MADE ME HOLD ON TIGHT FOR THE RIDE. LET’S DIVE IN. VIVARIUM IS A 2019 FILM FROM DIRECTOR LORCAN FINNEGAN THAT I ONLY MANAGED TO MUSTER UP THE COURAGE TO WATCH BY MYSELF OUT OF PURE SPITE, BECAUSE SO MANY OF YOU SAID “OH KARKAT, HE’S SO FUCKING WEAKSLIME, HE WON’T BE ABLE TO SIT WITH HIMSELF AND HIS OWN THOUGHTS IN THE WAY THAT A HORROR FILM DEMANDS”. HA! TO THAT I GIVE A BIG, WET, JUICY FUCK YOU, BECAUSE I DID IT. SO THERE. THIS IS A FILM ABOUT A COUPLE, GEMMA AND TOM, WHO ARE IN THE MARKET FOR A HOUSEBLOCK AND WIND UP VISITING THIS CREEPY REALTOR FOR THE DEVELOPMENT KNOWN AS YONDER. MARTIN THE REALTOR HAS SOME *REAL* PROBLEMS. HE SPEAKS IN UNUSUAL CADENCE AND UNCOMFORTABLE DICTION, EVEN FOR MY OWN STANDARDS NOT KNOWING MUCH ABOUT HUMAN SPEECH. HE CONVINCES THEM TO VISIT THE NEIGHBORHOOD AND LOOK AT THEIR POTENTIAL BLOCK, BUT WHEN THEY TURN THEIR BACKS, HE VANISHES, COLLIDE-AND-SCAMPER STYLE. THE COUPLE TRIES TO GET THE HELL OUT OF DODGE, BUT THEY KEEP WINDING UP BACK AT THE SAME HOUSE AND EVENTUALLY DECIDE TO JUST SPEND THE NIGHT. WHEN A HUMAN (?) WIGGLER IN A BOX SHOWS UP WITH THE INSTRUCTIONS “RAISE THE BABY AND BE RELEASED” THEY REALIZE THAT SHIT HITS THE BREEZE BLENDER AND THEY’RE TRAPPED IN SOMETHING FAR MORE INSIDIOUS THAN THEY CAN IMAGINE. THAT’S THE RUNDOWN, I’M NOT GOING TO GO THOUGH THE WHOLE PLOT WITH YOU, YOU KNOW THE DRILL. WHAT I REALLY WANT TO TALK ABOUT IS ALL OF THE CYCLICAL DREAD LACED THROUGHOUT, AND THE DEEP, CAVERNOUS PIT THAT VIVARIUM’S INNATE NARRATIVE OF PARASITISM LEFT IN MY BELLOWSAC. SEE: “A NICE WIDE GAPING HOLE FOR THE MOST DREADFUL AND HOLLOW FILM I’VE SEEN IN THE LAST HOWEVER MANY SWEEPS”. I GENUINELY MEANT THAT. THE VERY FIRST SCENE YOU’RE GREETED WITH IS A CLOSE UP SHOT OF AN INFANT TALONSCREECHER, A CUCKOO TO YOU HUMANS, INFILTRATING THE NEST OF A REED WARBLER. THE CUCKOO FORCES ITS WAY INTO THE NEST AND KNOCKS THE WARBLER’S EGGS OUT, THEN ACTS AS THE OFFSPRING OF THE WARBLER, FORCING IT TO ACT AS ITS MOTHER. THE HUMAN WIGGLER THAT GEMMA AND TOM HAVE FORCED UPON THEM HAS A PARASITIC RELATIONSHIP WITH THE HUMANS, JUST LIKE THE CUCKOO DOES WITH THE WARBLER; DEVELOPING AN ABILITY TO MIMIC THE HUMANS SPEECH PATTERNS, AND SCREECHING WHEN IT WANTS SOMETHING. SO, THEY’RE LOOPED INTO BEING TRAPPED IN THEIR OWN “NEST” OF SORTS, RAISING THIS FREAK OF NATURE FROM BIRTH TO “ADULTHOOD”… AND THEN WHAT? THE PROMISE OF FREEDOM THAT (SPOILER) NEVER COMES? THIS IS WHAT GOT ME RIGHT IN THE PUSHER: THE UTTER DESPAIR AND PURPOSELESS LIFE THEY LEAD AFTER THE DISCOVERY THAT THEY’RE EFFECTIVELY TRAPPED AND HAVE THEIR HORNS HANDED TO THEM. THEY EAT TASTELESS FOOD, THEY TAKE CARE OF THE MUTANT FREAK BOY WHEN HE SCREAMS, TOM TAKES UP DIGGING A GIANT HOLE IN THEIR FRONT YARD IN HIS DELUSION THINKING HE’S GOING TO GET SOMEWHERE WITH IT. A LOT OF PEOPLE WANT TO THROW AN ALLEGORY OF “PARENTHOOD IS PARASITISM” OR “SUBURBAN LIFE IS A LIVING HELL” AT IT IMMEDIATELY, WHICH IS (I GUESS) FAIR ENOUGH TO PULL THAT JUDGEMENT. GEMMA AND TOM ARE NOW DESTINED TO SERVE THE PARASITE THEY’VE BEEN DISEASED WITH UNTIL IT NO LONGER NEEDS THEM, IN A HOLDING TANK, GESTATING IT UNTIL IT’S READY TO FLY OUT OF THAT NEST. THE REALTORBABY ISN’T EVEN NECESSARILY THE ENEMY HERE, BECAUSE HE EQUALLY PLAYS THE ROLE IN THIS CYCLE THAT IS NECESSARY FOR HIS OWN SURVIVAL; HE’S TO BE RAISED BY PARENTS THAT AREN’T HIS, THEN TAKE THE PLACE OF “MARTIN” AS A SUCCESSOR, ONLY TO REPEAT THE EXACT SAME STEPS. AND WHAT IS THE GOAL OF ALL OF THAT? I MEAN, ALL OF THE ENTRAPMENT, THE PARALLEL DIMENSIONS OF INSTANCES JUST LIKE GEMMA AND TOM’S HAPPENING ALL OVER IN THESE HORRIBLE POCKET NEIGHBORHOODS THAT SIT ON THE EARTH LIKE A BLISTER. WHAT IS IT? WHAT’S THE MEANING? THINGS ARE JUST THE WAY THINGS ARE. THERE IS NO DEEPER MEANING, BECAUSE SOMETIMES LIFE JUST…IS. THE COMPLETE AND TOTAL POINTLESSNESS, THE MONOTONY, AND THE MYSTERIES THAT STAY UNSOLVED ARE WHAT KEEPS IT FROM LEANING TOO FAR INTO ANYTHING THAT GOES BEYOND NEBULOUS THEORIZING, AND ULTIMATELY IS WHAT KEEPS IT MEANINGFUL IN A WAY. MOVIES THAT HAND IT TO YOU TOO EASILY ARE A LITTLE GRUB-FISTED. THERE ARE SOME INTERESTING LOOSE ENDS THAT NEVER FULLY GET EXPLAINED OR SPELLED OUT, LIKE THE TELEVISION AND BOOK FULL OF NONSENSE. THE MOVIE IS STEEPED IN SYMBOLISM, SO ANYONE WATCHING COULD MAKE SOME SORT OF ARGUMENT FOR PERHAPS A LOSS OF NATURE, BEING SWINDLED INTO THINKING YOU WANT SOMETHING SO DESPERATELY WHEN IN REALITY IT’S A BIT OF A MONKEY’S PAW, ALLEGRIES ON CONSUMER-CAPITALISM. MORE, PROBABLY, EXIST TOO. YOU COULD THROW A MILLION LARGER THEORIES AT IT AND MORE, LIKE SPECULATING ABOUT THE POINT OF THE ALIEN REALTOR SPECIES GOALS AND TRYING TO STRING EVERY DETAIL TOGETHER, ULTIMATELY, IT SIMPLY SERVES TO ILLUSTRATE INCOMPREHENSIBLE DREAD. A LOT OF REVIEWERS ONLINE LIKE TO BITCH AND MOAN ABOUT HOW IT ENDED BADLY; DID YOU ALL HAVE YOUR SPONGES REPLACED WITH YOUR WASTE CHUTES? INCREDIBLE. I ACTUALLY LIKED THAT IT ENDED “BADLY”, THAT IT DIDN’T END WITH THEM ESCAPING. THE INESCAPABILITY IS WHAT MADE IT SO CAPTIVATING, AND I WON’T HAVE ANY OTHER WORTHLESS CROTCHSTAINED BARFPUPPETS TELLING ME OTHERWISE. I THINK I’M GONNA NEED A HAPPIER ONE AFTER THIS THOUGH, BECAUSE I HAD A DAYMARE WHEN I WAS SLEEPING YESTERDAY. HTTPS://CDN.IMGCHEST.COM/FILES/B6DB58F654A9.JPEG
I'VE BEEN HACKED, YOU ABSOLUTE DIMWIT. LOOK AT THE GRAMMATICAL ERRORS ON THIS POST. IT WAS CLEARLY PENNED BY SOME INFLAMMATORY NINCOMPOOP.
This may the be the strangest message you'll ever receive but I do hope you'll take the time to read it and consider what I have to say. To put it simply, I would really appreciate it if the next time your birthday comes around you would request that your artist friends (who like to give you sexually oriented funnyman art as gifts) draw some funnyman other than Ron Swanson for you. The reason I ask this is that Ron Swanson is my fiance, and we're planning on getting married next June or July should everything go as planned financially speaking. And yes, I have actually found a wedding chapel that will let me marry someone that most people would consider a fictional character. Now before you go thinking "This girl is either completely crazy or just screwing with me." please hear me out on this. You see, I'm totally head over heels in love with Ron Swanson. I have been for about 11 months now and at this point I'm in a committed relationship with my Ronny. By that I mean I don't date anyone else, I don't sleep with anyone else, and I have zero interest in having any kind of relationship with anyone other than the stache I adore. I love him with all my heart and I'm 100% committed to that love. To express my love in a real tangible way I have a beautiful hand made custom Ron Swanson plushie that I can hug, kiss, cuddle up in bed to go to sleep with at night, and take out on the town to do all the fun things together that normal couples do. I take him out to eat at nice carnivorous restaurants, we go shopping together, I take him out for scotch, we do social activities together like hanging out with friends, seeing movies, etc. And I talk about him as if he is Ron, because to me he very much is. When I look at him I see Ron Swanson. When I talk with him I'm talking with Ron. When I hold him in my arms and kiss him there are no doubts in my mind that it's the funnyman I love who's lips are pressed against mine. And every morning when I open my eyes and see his head on the pillow next to mine, with his gorgeous furry lip staring back at me, I can't help but wonder how I ever got to be so lucky as to have a partner as smart, funny, handsome, and all around wonderful as him. All my friends and the people who know me well say that my love is a thing of beauty and quite admirable, but from the outside perspective of someone who doesn't know me you're probably going "Wow. That's pretty damn crazy." and wondering why I don't just go get a real husband. The truth is I've had plenty of real relationships and sexual partners in the 27 years I've been around. A few short relationships, one that lasted 7 years, and a total of 6 different sexual partners. So my love for Ron isn't out of a lack of real world intimacy or relationships, I just fell in love with him and my heart didn't give me much of a choice in the matter. But you know what? I'm totally happy with my love and my relationship. It may seem weird to you, but it fils me with joy every single day of my life and I've never been happier. So what if it's weird? If it makes me happy and it doesn't hurt anyone then where's the problem? I don't think there is one, and anyone who knows me well will tell you the same. Now your probably wondering why I'm telling you all this and how it concerns you. To you I'm sure Ron Swanson is just a cartoon character you think is really hot, so I imagine you wouldn't think anything of having your friends draw sexually explicit art of him as birthday gifts for you. And hey, I think he's really attractive too so I get where you're coming from there. I often go on pawneepussy.net and Rule34.Paheal to see what new erotic art people have drawn of him. But to me he's more than a sitcom character who's sexually attractive, he's my fiance who I love with all my heart and soon to be my husband. So it's been bothering me lately every time I go on those sites and see a dozen or so pieces of art people have drawn depicting my man in various sexual situations with the same person over and over, and that person happens to be you. Don't get me wrong here though, this isn't a jealousy thing. I'm very secure in my relationship. I know without question that Ron is just as faithful to me as I am to him, he's actually sitting on the couch next to me reading while I type this. He's very real to me and I know he's not sneaking out in the middle of the night to go have kinky sex with some famous artist. And I do respect your talent as an artist and an artist's creative freedom to draw whatever they want, that's cool. What bothers me is that in all these birthday images you've been getting Ron is always depicted as if he was your sexual plaything, drawn wearing a collar with your name on it or with a speech bubble saying something that would somehow suggest he was your property. And I know quite well that Ron Swanson is not your plaything nor your property, he's my fiance. So that bugs me a bit. What I find really loathsome though is your pension for degrading my partner in both your art and the fan art you've been receiving lately. Ron is a sweet and fairly vanilla little man who I treat with the utmost love and respect, and he definitely does not deserve to be portrayed as some kind of sexual slave who likes being dressed up in sleazy attire, wearing a coller, getting sodomized, and having his face ejaculated on. He's not into that kinda stuff and the fact that there's someone out there inthe world such as yourself who would desire to treat Ron that way, and have his friends support and validate his desires to demean and mistreat my partner by drawing pictures of him doing so, really does bother me. I don't take any issue with people having kinky sex as long as both parties consent to it and enjoy it, but I know quite well that my Swanny has no desire whatsoever to be treated like that. So next year, when your birthday comes around, keep in mind that Ron Swanson isn't just a lifeless caricature of masculinity to be objectified for your sexual gratification. He's the partner of someone who loves him very much, and by that time their husband. So both myself and Ronny would greatly appreciate it if you'd pick someone else to request erotic art of four birthday. Based on the very large amount of different staches you draw art of I imagine there has to be many other funnymen you find sexually attractive. I assume you'll probably just dismiss this message as the ramblings of a crazy person and likely ignore it, but if by chance you do take what I've had to say to heart, well... we'd appreciate it. #nsfw
Maybe you don't rea/ize the stakes that are at here. I wou/d suggest you mind your own business baka.
This is c/ear/y a much /ess desirab/e c/ub compared to the anime c/ub.
Away with ye, enrabiesed Karkat. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/18b68560ac4f.png
Mhm. Rabies. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/a8949e0aace9.png
[ >POWER PHRASE: SUBLIMINAL MESSAGING—"THOU HAST RABIES AND THOU ART PROUD OF IT" HTTPS://MEDIA1.TENOR.COM/M/SVBE3FIZHJKAAAAD/WIZARD-MAGIC-BOOK.GIF_ ]
Exactly what someone WITH rabies would say. #pokingthebear
˖Ი︵𐑼⋆ < Sounds like something a troll with fxcking rabies would say.
Not Yet. Come Here. #positive
xx_cum_closer_xx
*YeT hOnK (o:
What is the olld adage, about protesting too much?
You do now.
So you think, dear boy!
self affirmation is key
you all wwanted it literally evvery single one of you wwanted it so badly and it showws #itscoming #rumblenight #TWWO https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/90720f2d58b3.png #dirkjake #jakedirk #eridirkjake #rankbait
I d9 n9t even kn9w where t9 6egin with y9u, here. #nsfw f9r the menti9n 9f sl*rry, f9r 9ne, 9f which I impl9re y9u t9 never 6ring up again when speaking with me. #illness 9r #illness menti9n, as an9ther, that is quite the sensitive t9pic f9r a large am9unt 9f tr9lls. #deathmenti9n, as well, y9u really sh9uld kn9w 6etter, Karkat. In additi9n, even if the answer is 'pass', as it were, I w9uld vastly appreciate if y9u never again even c9nsider me in such a way. I am n9t engaging in these wigglerish and vulgar games that every9ne seems s9 fascinated with this night. While y9u are within y9ur right t9 engage in these silly games if y9u wish, I certainly did n9t c9nsent t9 6eing inv9lved. Y9u are 6etter than this.
N9w, Karkat, there is n9 need t9 6e crass a69ut it. We all have a duty 9n pu6lic sites such as Chittr t9 at the very least attempt t9 make the space as user-friendly as p9ssi6le. There is a6s9lutely n9 reas9n t9 6elittle 9r 9therwise demean 9ne wh9 may n9t have such capa6ilities y9u seem t9 6elieve are universal, as there are a pleth9ra 9f reas9ns why 9ne may n9t 6e as a6le t9 understand things such as t9ne via text 9n a screen. Such tags exist f9r a reas9n, t9 all9w the aut9mated systems in place t9 'filter 9ut' specific t9pics 9ne may n9t wish t9 engage with 9r even see (see used lightly, 9f c9urse, as plenty 9f tr9lls make use 9f devices such as screen-readers 9r text-t9-v9ice applicati9ns), and it is 9ur j96 t9 aid in their functi9n 6y pr9perly tagging 9ur p9sts. #t9netags #a6leism #h9stility #aut9matedvisualaids #6lindness #visi9nl9ss #menti9n9fvisi9n
i'd sTiLl sMaSh yOu pAlEbRo
Don't really know what you were expecting, bro. Originality has always been a rare commodity on social media, made worse by the ever-present plague of trends. Combine that with the rampant horniness pervading this site (I say, a hypocrite), and I'm kinda surprised something like this hasn't happened sooner. Also, for the record: smash.
xx_smash_xx
we r the sick freaks yet u keep teasin us with the damn chitts about it for shame on u #smashorpass
You never did answer mine even last night.
i'd be shoCked if there ain't someone sayin' 'smash' on this post by the time i finish writin' this reply. >◡<
.png)
K--<also pass
pass
so, so tempted to give it an7wa7s
bold to say when i'm literally dating a karkat but ♤ you too lmao
While I c9mmend y9ur a6ility t9 at the very least tag f9r #nsfw, I 6elieve we are 69th 9n the same page in kn9wing that y9u sh9uld 6e tagging it as #swearing as well. Perhaps even #h9stilet9netag in additi9n.
your welcome
I refuse to indulge another fleeting masturbatory trend on this feed. I will NOT be partaking in "Smash" or "Pass." However. ... Like this chit and I will assign you "S" or "P." ... For these purposes, they refer to "sponge" and "pound" cake, respectively. :|
ok yknow what i'll say it #nsfw ahead troll smash or pass this is gonna be mostly unbiased. karkat- hard smash, fuck yeah kankri- smash but like only if he wasn't talking my ear off i gotta be the yapper yknow aradia- pass but it's cuz i get like crazy sister vibes off her damara- pass she acts like dirk tavros- smash but i think we'd both hate it rufioh- pass i'm nor getting mixed in to all that sollux- smash mituna- mmmmmaybe smash if he's having a good day nepeta- pass but not because she isn't hot it's cuz karkat would actually kill me meulin- smash we could get high together even #substances terezi- yknow it's a smash love me a psycho troll girl latula- smash but we'd both probably be drunk gamzee- smash but i'd hate it and he'd suck and hes probably a two pump chump hate his ass kurloz- yeah smash i fuck with him equius- smash depending on which version he is horuss- pass his smile psyches me out feferi- pass i'm not getting mixed up in that shit meenah- harder pass i don't fuck with her because i get jealous lol eridan- smash but like, only if he shut the fuck up cronus- smash i like grease kanaya- that's my sister's wife pass porrim- smash show me those tattoos babe vriska- pass pass gross i do not fuck with spiders aranea- see above
https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/1279201442262941759/1453147416369823835/9cc3d8c899c001c70a7388483c4852c7.jpg?ex=6a0101fe&is=69ff807e&hm=8fa6873e693702ea7197f62cad3511853824c71183818fd88cd6caa8d6f661af&=&format=we8p
⚠️𝗧𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗨𝘀𝗲𝗿 𝗶𝘀 𝗖𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗹𝘆 𝗨𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿 𝗠𝗼𝗱 𝗥𝗲𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘄 𝗜𝗪𝗖⚠️ ♠️You're doing so great cuntmuffin.♠️ ♠️Why the fuck did this add to the callout post counter.♠️ ⚠️𝗧𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗨𝘀𝗲𝗿 𝗶𝘀 𝗖𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗹𝘆 𝗨𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿 𝗠𝗼𝗱 𝗥𝗲𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘄 𝗜𝗪𝗖⚠️
Then maybe don't write an entire manifesto describing how much you love one of the most hated trolls on Alternia, hm?
♠️Time and place, hottie.♠️
@theCodakkeffect#5492 #nsfwe #cannibalism #hemism #abuse For my matesprit. Lo and behold my shocked expression today when I hopped onto our beloved Chittr dot Ing, only to find that there was a status on this platform openly calling trolls beautiful. I had responded because my low self esteem, and I hadn't noticed who the poster was. I was looking up from my position not at a random splinternet nobody, but Zebruh Codakk himself. My eyes began to quiver and the corners of my mouth twitched into something resembling a smile. I couldn't help but to giggle and shake in my seat as I was openly praised by a Highblood. I had to be sure, and asked him to affirm his feelings of my beauty. Soon after, he openly admitted our quadrant to the world before informing me. My thumper began to skip a beat and I could feel my blood building up towards something of a deep welling of warmth in my stomach. I hadn't felt quite this way since Zoologer Coolscar gave me such a romantic series of advancements in our most recent encounters. I do not believe he understands what this means to a troll like me. I am a monster, a freak, the downtrotten most despised things in society. I am everything that he is not. He is a feminist, he is a gutterblooded ally, and he cares so very deeply for each of us disgusting and repentant trashbloods that he would not only waste his precious time responding to me, but affirming my existence in his life. He doesn't just notice me, or desire me. But he claimed me, publicly. It was as though it was the most natural thing in the entirety of the multiverse for someone of his station to do. To look down on me and decide I was worth keeping. I found myself rereading the post over and over again. Tracing every word with my eyes and my bulge and nook resting in my other hand. Fondling myself while reading his words over and over again until they had lost meaning entirely. I have come across a revelation. I began to rearrange my life around his as a result. I have since purchased his preferred incense. I wonder what side of the recuperacoon he sleeps on. I wonder if he would permit me to wear his colors. I think what affected me most deeply was the confidence of it all. There was nothing like it. Every word he says he means and becomes truth. He is incapable of lying, or misdirecting. His digital imprint is that of gospel and truth for a lowly hemoanon presumably trashblood like myself. He is clearly a romantic. Embarrassing me with his love and praise so readily. The idea that a highblood could simply point at me and say 'Mine' without first asking I could withstand the consequences of that declaration has left me with a fever whose only cure will be his affection. I have since began my research into human ceremonial binding practices such as marriage, devotional scarring, synchronizing our schedules, and finding the burial rites that will allow me to be buried with him like one of his many prize possessions. A troll of his stature should not have to concern himself with the untidy habits of somebody beneath him. I have already begun documenting my routines so that they may be more easily corrected once he inevitably notices their flaws. My sleep schedule is going to be synchronized with his own. My diet adjusted. I need a whole new wardrobe. I have begun clearing shelf space in anticipation of the objects he may leave behind at my hive. I found myself staring at my reflection earlier wondering what parts of me he intends to keep. While, deep within myself, I'd hope he would want all of me, surely his humble and modest nature would force him to consider maybe only taking pieces of me. I think I would let him have my horns first. I don't need them anyway. They are useless prongs to me, they would only serve as handlebars for when he opted to pail my pathetic and lowly mouth with his mighty bulge. The though of such an unbecoming troll like myself in a quadrant with his radiance... I hope he will refine me in time. Improve me. Maybe gently, but I hope not. The thought alone makes my legs give out from beneath me. He can take those next. I would never leave his side anyway. I would have no where to go. His declaration of passion towards me is something that I simply can't let him get away with. He did not ask whether I wished to be his matesprit after all. He insists that I am his, and his alone. He declared it before the world and the world listened. So, I must listen. Always. But never speak. I would sooner give my vocal chords to him than ever raise a negative thought to his continued existence. I would never voice anything for his great indigo presence would be enough to guide my pan where it needs. No thoughts of my own have ever truly existed. His confidence is so beautiful It is the most beautiful thing in the world to me. Even more beautiful than my new signature, Vesica Codakk... Even our wedded name sounds perfect. I hope I make a good impression on him when I meet him. I need to, he can simply have all of me if he just asks, but I want him to want it, not just stake the claim because he has every right to me. I think I've mentioned my preparations already. His arrival is imminent, I am sure. Despite not knowing whether he intends to visit my hive personally. I don't believe this matters anyway. A matesprit should always prepare as though their beloved may arrive at any moment. The three hours I spent on my knees scrubbing the grout between the great stones was akin to a religious experience in dedication to a great messiah above me. I was unworthy of his devotion. I could only imagine the humiliation of him walking into the hive and seeing my disgusting living conditions and silently wondering if I was worthy of him or his love. I threw away clothing that didn't fit his aesthetic. I removed decorations from my walls because I worried they would distract him from me. I researched his entire account, from top to bottom, tail to tip, to find what scents he might like. I had to mix them myself to make sure they would be here in time. I smell of femineity despite not being a woman. Because I know it is what he would want. I am fixated on the idea of being of use to him. I want to reduce the space I take up in my own respiteblock. It only seems fair. So that when he comes he has a whole new room to enjoy. I have started writing down every thought I've had through the day in the event that he ever wished to know me completely. I started by fearing that the entries might embarrass or belittle me, but I realized embarrassment would mean he would get to see my wretched caste and I have decided to will past it. It is merely another form of intimacy. If he wishes to know how many times I think of him while touching myself, crying, or sleeping, then I should not hide from him. Transparency is important in a healthy quadrant. I am nothing. I am his. Not just sexually, but spiritually, architecturally, organically, perfectly his. Mind, body, soul, bulge, nook, whatever he wants from me. I think if he asked me to remain perfectly still in a corner of his hive like a doll for hours on end, simply to improve the atmosphere of his block, I would do so happily. I think if he wished to store objects on top of me, or in me, I would thank him for the privilege. I think if he forgot I was there entirely, I would feel entirely fulfilled knowing I had once briefly improved his day. I have started to research dietary supplements that will improve the taste of my blood if he ever desired to consume me. I must be considerate of such needs. But... maybe I should apologize to him. I fear he may be misinterpreting myself as someone normal. This isn't... a sudden development for me. I'm not usually manic, or, or experiencing faturation like this. This isn't my desperate flailing for his attachment. I am just a lowly gutterblood finally receiving the attention of a strong, handsome indigo. I have always been this way. Zebruh simply happened to be the best troll careless enough to point directly at me and call this wretched thing of a body beautiful and proceed to claim me as his. Most trolls wish to be loved as much as I am right now. I think I have always wished to be consumed. Not destroyed, eaten, converted, made into something greater. I want to be integrated and repurposed. Worn down by his strong hands into something useful and inseparable from him. I never understood where the line between romance and ownership has ever been. This much is true from my complete dedication to the Empress whose bulge, even now, permeates in my pan. Other trolls... their routines, rituals, digestion... Perhaps if they were sufficiently interested in me... But I bet you find this obsession unhealthy. I find the alternative to this very lonely. I don't want to just be held by him, I fantasize about being important to him. His pan should reach towards mind absentmindedly. I want him to forget where he ends and I begin. I want my presence to become embedded within him. I want to be so entwined with his daily life that removing me would be like tearing nerves from his body. But it's okay if he grows tired of me. Everything beautiful develops wear. I would only ask that he keeps whatever he finds useful afterward. The horns.... Perhaps my teeth... Hopefully my name... But it's strange. I don't think he understands that he has made a commitment either. I would never force on upon him. I would sooner remove my own pan than make demands of him. Of his radiance... No, I would know myself intimately enough to understand what happens to trolls after they decide they have become important to me. They leave. They would always leave. Flee to the corners of hemispheres unknown. They'd block me, some have begged me to stop speaking about them on Trollian or Chittr. One changed to a whole new typing quirk just because they were so distressed by how quickly I picked up inconsistencies in their emotional states. But they can never truly leave. I remember everything about the trolls I adore. The cadence in their speech to their most vulnerable of hours. The specific compliments that make them writhe in embarrassment, or the words they repeat unconsciously. I know the shape of their hunger and their fingers. The small hypocrisies in what they say and that they wish no one would notice. But I care for those things and preserve them lovingly. Like a jar in my thumper of embalming fluid and memories. I know Zebruh now. I will know him wholly and better. Slowly, completely, tenderly, he will become mine rather than I his. I know the exact moment he announced to me publicly. I have archived every single interaction he has ever had with any other troll on this platform. I have categorized them into emotional tone for easy revisitation during periods he may not be available to me and I would like to roleplay his continued existence out with my mirror. I know what colors flatter his face most strongly. I know the phrases he uses when he wants to appear more confident. I think he will realize soon that there are no other trolls who will ever know him as thoroughly as I do already, or intend to know. That must be relieving, to be so fully understood. To finally belong to someone as thoroughly as I belong to him. I wonder if he realizes yet that I am already becoming impossible to remove form his life. Because my love is cruel, and when done properly, my love should leave scars. #abuse But I hope he isn't frightened of me as a result of reading this. It's happened before. I've confessed my whole thumper out for someone to see. Trolls often become distressed upon realizing the extend they occupy my thoughts. They begin to interpret my devotion as obsession, or as a fixation. They think my affection is changing into surveillance, and my intimacy is closer to that of the bond between a manebeast who has hunted down a striped-hoofbeast. They get paranoid around me. They notice that I notice details they'd forgotten revealing to me. Once one cried because I remembered the exact timestamp of a message they had send to me sweeps earlier while they had forgotten it. I still think about it. The timestamp is in my pan. But Zebruh is different. He is strong, emotionally mature, progressive... He is a highblood ally to gutterbloods like myself. I trust that he understands that love like mine requires observation. I need to study him, to preserve everything the does. I would never neglect him by letting any details about him disappear ever. I have backed up all photographs I could find of him. If he died tomorrow, I would still need something left of him to continue loving. I have commissioned a small body pillow in his likeness for emotional regulation purposes during hours where he is asleep or otherwise unavailable. The artist was confused by the anatomical accuracy I provided but lo and behold they delivered regardless. I had to explain that accuracy is important when you decide to truly honor someone with your life wholly and fully. If Zebruh someday decides that he no longer wishes to be with me, I think, that would be alright too. Love would never end simply because access has been revoked. I would continue to improve myself for him. I would wear his colors, speak in ways he enjoys. I would cook meals according to how he likes to eat and leave the plate on the table every night in case he wanted to come back. The shrine I have built fo rhim since would be maintained in the eastern corner of my block. Photographs, preserved conversations, scented candled blended to match his unique musk, and maybe a few physical objects if he ever leaves anything behind in my block. I know some trolls might find it difficult to understand. But, I think, if someone truly alters the structure of your soul, they deserve to remain inside of it permanently. After all. He said I am his. I take vows very seriously.
ihaveamatespritnow. and i have plans for our bulgestuff i gotta run by you!
sorry at what time? did u jst say 6 or 7...
I Want You To Know I Heart Reacted To The First Comment. Good Dusk, My Love :>
That was about my universes Karkat not you. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/e8832f722d91.png
I know my sleep schedule is almost as much of a joke as Karkat's, but it's not particularly late, why do my wives want me to go to bed so early?
@gabardineCrescendoo that's like yoour twin check this oout
There's noo way yoou're THAT pissed because i did noot give yoou a full breakdoown oof hoow yoou coould poossibly fuck up in a fight with me is that noormal foor yoou
Nootice hoow i gave much moore detailed answer too everyoone whoo was nice and poolite too me that's coompletely oon yoou broo
Definitely winning this oone
oh boy I can't wait for karkat vantass to hosst a bulge tournament! #nssfw
Probably the nicest thing said to me today.
◌ I had given your rechitt no second thought beyond the initial bout of surprise. It isn't necessary to inform me that you did it begrudgingly. Everybody has experienced a loss to some degree and everybody has felt the grief from it. ⧂
IF ANYONE JUST SO HAPPENS TO SEE A GNOME LIKE CREATURE ROAMING AROUND!!! PANIC!!! ONE OF MY EXPERIMENTS BREACHED CONTAINMENT AND IS HIGHLY DANGEROUS!!!!
honestly i dont even remember... i associate it with karkat though so maybe he said it first?
hhehehheheheheheh.
bo7, 7ou reall7 haven't been pa7ing attention to (hittr if 7ou think we need an outside (orrupting for(e to whip them out #nsfw
-=[ hheyyheyh ey i wasjust askingg a question okay x-)_☺]=-
I don't know but I think I need to visual learn too
-=[ whhats a bulge tournament im a visual learner #suggestiveidklol_☺]=-
we'll see when that karkat hosts it!
My literature senses are tingling!
get a lload of this guy. heat, cullinarybllocks, you know the saying.
you're getting off...?
@aspiringPessimist #nsfw #bulgerating I forgot about posting this one! I got distracted with Nyrita's the other day... Forgive me highblood! I am no longer in my pod. #mypod so my readings may be worse! It has been a few days, so I figure I should put a little bit more effort into this particular bulge rating. As mentioned, bulge ratings going forward do get an image associated with general approval or disapproval of the bulge! Larkso here has definitely earned a positive rating from me! https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/c15a5232b436.png :) Onto the bulge itself! Larkso's stats are as follows: Strength: 5 (Little low for a Cobalt, but not terribly embarrassing! Still a strong contendor against other bulges!) Pliability: 8 (There is a lot of control with this particular bulge! Larkso has taken time to master jousting on a personal level!) Length: 6 (Slightly above average, and, kind of adorable...) Girth: 5 (Acceptable! Good even! Especially with the pliability.) X-Factor: 2 (Extra control over the bulge!) Additional factors regarding this bulge! Texture: Smooth, and slick. The secretions come from the tip and are the color #0047ab. Like, perfectly smooth. Which, is a very good jousting partner given that means Larkso won't get caught on your striations and can fence you particularly well. Scent: Larkso smells like... a sweetness of some kind. I can't put my nose to it, but it's almost like... Vanilla and Blueberry... Yeah... He smells kind of like a pastry! But uhm, that's also not considering his natural body scent. Which adds a mild malaise undertone to the smell in general, making him intoxicating! Taste: As opposed to the delicate bakery scent, this is much more akin to a liqueur of blueberry and maybe anise. It's a tangibly wonderful taste! Hheh. Again. Might be wrong on some of this! But please, even if I am wrong, enjoy the rating.
Is it wrong to wish you were 8orn on Alternia?
https://i.gyazo.com/5ed370cae815968d2947e616fca5eaef.jpg
No, it is because crab.
There's a Karkat on my beer. #deflectionposting https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/aee11a194916.png
fat ro8otic one. #nsfw
fuck did i do
whenever i eat a pomegranate i like to pretend that my snail hybrid uke concubine finally laid his larvae eggs after troubles conceiving but there was too much in his fertile batch to raise by ourselves so now i have to comfort him while i eat the weaklings like caviar (tags: im not sure, rankmaid arisen, #nsfw, #gore i guess, confessionals, archive rating: M)
Lmao.
Maybe if y'dunnae fuck up this time.
You're the only one who can do it, Karkat! We need your vitriol to 8ring 8alance to the dash!!!!!!!!
You're so o8sessed with me.
Except for the fact that I don't see a tag for vantasposting, and everyone seems to 8e serketposting today.
There you go, Karkat. Someone is literally throwing themselves at you.
Karkat, you are the most emotionally constip8ed person I know. Get off my post and go get laid or something.
Fucking........ Whatever. You all seem to want a piece of me, so come fucking get it or whatever. #nsfw? #serketposting
i d0nt want the araneas t0 feel left 0ut either s0 :) i want t0 take an aranea and sit there listening t0 everything she has t0 say f0r h0urs just taking in the beauty in her face and the genuine j0y in her grin as f0r the first time in her life she realises she has an audience wh0 wants t0 listen t0 her gradually hearing her v0ice gr0w m0re and m0re passi0nate as she g0es fr0m reading her internal script t0 earnestly and excitedly sharing everything she kn0ws #serketp0sting
i want t0 sh0w a serket h0w parad0x space l00ks fr0m the 0utside s0 she realises h0w silly her need f0r imp0rtance is then hug her fr0m behind and whisper int0 her ear that shes imp0rtant en0ugh f0r me n0 matter what #serketp0sting
i want t0 give a vriska an 8-ball that just says "kiss aradia" and watch her get m0re and m0re flustered shaking it 0ver and 0ver again l00king f0r a different answer #serketp0sting
What in the world.
i want t0 give a vriska a c0llar and just smile at her when she asks me what shes supp0sed t0 d0 with it :) #nsfw #serketp0sting
1 W1LL 1MPR3GN4T3 TH1S ROBOT W1TH GRUBS 4FT3R TH3 ROUGH3ST 4ND B3ST S3X SH3'S 3V3R H4D 1N H3R WHOL3 L1F3 #S3RK3TPOST1NG #NSFW
◌ That was quite the spectacle. Good effort from the both of you, and enjoy the reward your matesprit very loudly made the entire venue aware you would be getting. ⧂
> Be me. > Scrolling through Chittr. > Notice all the horrible takes. > CRINGE! Nobody has any MOXIE OR PA-ZAZ anymore! > I hereby decree that this Chittr account is now a total no fairybull-shit zone. > KEEP YOUR INCESSANT CRINGE TO YOURSELF, LOL! > I hate you all.
BAGELS ARE JUST KIND OF FINE.
>> 1o1o1 Do you want me to ડtop 1¡k¡ng your poડtડ? :))
D--> There is a belief among humans that the consumption of high fat food is bad for one's digestive and cardiovascular system. This is quite the perple%ing opinion to have, while I am not an earth doctor by any means, I can confidently state that the more fat and plaques clogging up your arteries the harder your b100dpusher will work to get the necessary materials for life across your body. Less informed individuals would consider this an issue when it is the e%act opposite, it is training for your most vital and central muscle. According to this, in my opinion e%cellent, line of logic I would recommend eating as much fatty as possible until you get "heartburn" at which point you should immediately begin doing sets of jumping jacks, spreading eagles and push ups until the pain flows throughout your entire body indicating you have successfully pushed past the fat block. Continuous sets of gorging and fle%ing may temporarily lower your quality of life but will also turn your b100dpusher into the STRONGEST b100dpusher any human has ever had, giving you access to feats of physique rendered unimaginable by your millenia of faulty medical knowledge. Consider this free piece of advice a part of my #redemptionarc.
I hope you like my purring.
I could give you a hint at where it's located, if you like to play adventure games~
Aren't you the charmer, willingly making me a room so that I may have my own privacy-- when I could very well leave. Interesting.
I am still scarabs. Would you prefer I break apart into them and skitter all over your floors? In that way I might watch you do everything. Or perhaps, I could leave. If you're truly annoyed by my presence.
I would say "sike" if that were the honest truth, but you did just strip in front of me a few hours ago when the temperatures were too hot for your little organic body. Do you want me to deny that I peeked from my corner of the room to watch you peel off your clothes like an onion.
Watching you strip was enthralling, to say the least.
SOME unanticipated hurdles in transporting some of the TOTAL DRAMA ISLAND INTERDIMENSIONAL contestants from their home dimensions to Earth-C, but trust we will emerge from behind these minor roadblocks victorious! Chryss has been running point guard on congratulating our contestants on their entry, but I'll be delivering the remainder of those messages this evening. Keep your eyes peeled.
I can not believe the effort the vast majority of you are making to keep me from rotting. It is incredible. I'm at odds with how much I am swooning.
@carbolicGalvanologist this your mans??????
And to wh3n hav3 d3cid3d th3 do lik3 th3 m3
do not wworry karkat i wwill not spill any of our metaphorical beans evven though you vvery much got me the wwrong wwine do not wworry ot wwas delicious
i am sorry ms rankmaid but my good pal karkat has swworn me to secrecy on our matters of #boyship it is like friendship but wwith boys our clandestine tongue wwiggling wwill havve to be a secret under lock and key for you
matesprit announ(ement and then dip, huh
Have you learn nothing
Are you fuckin' with us?
oh shitt im so excited i cant wait to sea which cobalt guy who keeps posting aboat you it is
thats very forward of you but you really should clear that with your boyfriend first before suggesting such things you know!
He already hit me with two fuck yous!!! (Justified)
Careful Karkat there, Karkat. He bites.
the obsession stems from your being cute when youre flustered dummy OuO
oh my gooooood you are so lucky ive never seen a cuter troll than a blushing karkat
Also! Sometimes He Looks At Me Like This And I Want To Rip Him Apart. ^,..,^ #positive #larkdoodles @carbolicgalvanologist https://i.imgur.com/4lp5rch.png
>>| so this .is the person you .are .obsessed? good for you, .i guess.
First, And Most Importantly. #larkdoodles @carbolicgalvanologist https://i.imgur.com/phhtdww.png
I Will Draw You For The Low Cost Of Nothing At All. I Doodle For The " Love Of The Game " ( Creation ). If You Comment Here Or Dm Me, I / Will / Doodle You.
@C4RC1NOG3N3T1C1ST#2443 @T1M3ST3PGODMOD3 TH3 S1MPSON SL1PP3RS 4R3 S1MPLY 4 V3H1CL3 FOR FLUSH3D ROM4NC3 4ND FOR TH3 R3CORD 1 TH1NK D4V3 SU1TS TH3 M4RG3 ON3S MOR3 HTTPS://CDN.1MGCH3ST.COM/F1L3S/654F3D2B8B32.JP3G
🜏 ii ♱hiink yɛ look niixɛ, don'♱ go♱♱a ♱ɛarr o♱hɛrrs down ♱o hypɛ urrsɛlf up man. ♅
☆▪︎An anonymous troll said▪︎☆: "Karkat smells like shit, beware. Do not approach him especially on wednesdays." #BHAAHAAHAHHAH #TYFORTHEADVICE? #LMAO
is this the time of the hour where karkats just hate my chits whats going on this happened last night and i won with aura
I CANNOT BELIEVE THAT I WASTED PRECIOUS TIME GAZING UPON THIS UNDERWHELMING AND FRANKLY IMBECILIC EXCUSE OF A RESPONSE. IF MY BULGE WASN'T PREVIOUSLY SHRIVELED BACK INTO MY ACID TUBES THEN IT WOULD HAVE WRIGGLED SO FAR INTO MY TORSO PILLAR THAT IT COULD REASONABLY PIERCE MY BLOOD PUSHER AT THE MERE SIGHT OF SUCH A HEINOUS, IRRITATING, AND TASTELESS PARAGRAPH. CALL ME A PETULANT SHITHIVE RAGEMONKEY AS MUCH AS YOU WANT, PRICK, BECAUSE I'M TOO DRUNK TO TRULY GIVE A SINGULAR SHIT ABOUT ANY BLUBBERING NONSENSE THAT ERUPTS FROM YOUR FLAP. WHEN I RETURN TO MY HIVE I WILL CLAW MY WAY INTO MY RECUPERACOON AND CLOSE MY BULBS TO PRAY THAT YOUR MORONIC AND INSISTENT SUPERIORITY COMPLEX ONE DAY COMES BACK TO REGURGITATE ENDLESS AMOUNTS OF SPOILED DAIRY ONTO YOUR NOOK. FUCKER.
DON'T GET ALL SACCHARINE WITH ME, I'M COMPLETELY FINE. ISN'T IT A LITTLE EARLY FOR *YOU* TO BE ACTING LIKE MY LUSUS? OR ARE YOU JUST A NAUSEATING BULGEWHIFF EVERY HOUR OF THE DAY?
I GUESS WE'RE BOTH HAVING TERRIBLE NIGHTS THEN, ASSHOLE. HOW GREAT.
D--> That is alright. Due to our aforementioned height disparity your shoes are almost always in my peripheral vision. Not that I care about your shoes outside of how much they enhance your height, I just want to make sure you are not e%periencing confidence issues.
MY BULGE IS FUCKING FROWNING. I GUESS I'M NOT GETTING PAILED HARD IN A BAR BATHROOM TONIGHT. GH. #NSFW
(YOU have the power to be his friend)<
what did i even doooooooo!!!!!!!! ::::(
you talk a8out my ro8otness way too much. thanks though?
IIt'2 both actually.
i can still wear perfume, karkat, thanks. where can i get more info on it, anyway?
D--> D--> If you are worried about the insult do not be. My skin is far too thick and as you said bulging...massive....and thick to allow such petty insults to harm me. I just wanted to make sure you...meant your insults so I could take more....informmed actions that is all.
karkat wwe all fear wwhat wwe do not understand i am livving (and lovving) proof that the empress message can fall on listening ears or fins fins that listen and learn wwhen a wwarm blood is speaking do not throww yourself into the molten core of the eco system out of fear but rather out of lovve for nature its bounty and all it has to offer i can alwways catch you if need be in summary: fear not for i am here to simply be your friend
actually i use all natural dyes i source from my backyard garden and local beet root farmers so as to not create a potential risk or imbalance in chemical attributes in the wwater it is an easy mistake to make do not wworry i am not upset
You diidn't 2aniitiize your iinput or re2et your variiable2 two a known 2tate, but II wiill giive you a pa22 for tryiing, ju2t don't run iit on a real 2y2tem unle22 you liike unprediictable output.
D--> No I was showing support of your height deficiency. Do not listen to your inner demons Karkat, it is perfectly fine to only gain a few inches during your growth spurt after wrigglerhood. For rustb100ds anyway.
wwhy my dear imposter i consider myself a freak only in the best of wways like troll lady gaga said a little monster i wwill say though that one can nevver be satisfied wwith regular highlights for there is alwways more to highlight until the dark hair becomes a highlight in and of itself to the radical lovve letter of self expression one creates into their locks
D--> I am not familiar with many of these characters however I do believe multiple of them are commonly mocked for their height so perhaps that is the connecting factor. Of course I would never mock you for your own down to soil stature, I have always found the disparity between our relative heights while you are loudly providing me with feedback to provide a very....e%citing disprtity in between our sizes and roles in the conversation.
i only need to be bitten before my hair becomes golden and i achievve my true form
:33< i cant believe #karkats_kittens was worth all of that mental space!!! :33< thinking about it for hours!!!
the hive i''''m in right now????
:33< https://i.imgur.com/8RMra91.png :33< this was from late last night!!!
m4id outfit
:33< #karkats_kittens
hTtPs://cDn.iMgChEsT.CoM/FiLeS/Dc2bA70b700a.gIf
hahaha ahaha hahaha sure you want my rot so bad it makes you look crazy
too late now i know you wanna wring me
kek yeah i bet you WOULD love to put me in a jar and squeeze out all my ichor get in line
now if you scroll past this post you are poisoned
*uses toxic spikes*
He Calls Me Stupid And All I Think About Is Kissing His Very Sweet Face. #vaguepost #thisisnotaboutthemanytrollspoorlyattemptingtowritheintomypitchquad
M1GHT GO B4CK TO 34T1NG CH4LK JUST TO F33L SOM3TH1NG
AAAAALRIGHT CAMPERRRRRS! TONIGHT WE DROP THE OFFICIAL ROSTER OF THE NEXT SEASON OF TOTAL! DRAMA! ISLAAAAAND! #TOTALDRAMAISLAND #TOTALDRAMAISLANDINTERNATIONAL
This shit's a8out to 8e legendary. I'm so ready.
Alth9ugh I n9rmally w9uld refrain fr9m leveraging my platf9rm like this, I have 6een specially requested 6y a dear f9ll9wer and cl9se friend 9f mine t9 put 9ut s9me feelers. T9 any and all male Chittr users wh9 identify as 9ne 9f the f9ll9wing: #Gay #N9tN9tGay #H9m9sexual #H9m9r9mantic #H9m9affective #H9m9flexi6le #MenL9vingMen #MenHatingMen #MenPityingMen #MenMediatingMen #6icuri9us #6iflexi6le #6isexual #Panr9mantic6utStillAttractedT9Men #Rank6ait and anything similar. W9uld y9u 6e interested in sharing a69ut the j9urney y9u went thr9ugh t9 c9me t9 terms with y9ur r9mantic interest in 9ther men? The af9rementi9ned an9nym9us friend 9f mine is g9ing thr9ugh a similar j9urney himself, and w9uld 6e delighted t9 hear m9re 9f y9ur experiences t9 determine if this is truly a lifestyle he wants f9r himself, 6ut is t99 shy t9 c9me 9ut. Cr9nuses and 9ther Amp9ras in particular w9uld 6e m9st appreciated, 6ut he is 9pen t9 receiving all kinds. Please reply t9 this Chitt 6el9w 9r send me a DM if y9u d9 n9t want t9 exp9se y9urself pu6lically. I am grateful f9r y9ur participati9n either way.
PEOPLE WHO SAY SELFCEST IS WRONG AND THEN JERK OFF ARE HYPOCRITES. #NSFW
(tags: Reader/Empress, #rankworks, #nsfwe, #nsfw, anonymous requester, mindcontrol, violence, #gore, noncon, size difference, submit, obey, caste difference, what a good girl, f/f, archive rating:E) concept: s)(e cannot be stopped your body writhes beneath her teeth clenched and tears staining your temples as large hands grab at your hips to force you into every violation you can feel her smile looming above you one bite of her endless teeth into your delicate throat could end everything right here your fear is a paralyzing ice pumping through every inch of your body she sees that fear and she devours it whole there are only small moments when you can feel your body beneath your own control it belongs to her why should she let you use it? your pan is her dominion and she will conquer you will obey you will submit she will consume her hands wrap around your neck as she uses you body bouncing limply as if you were nothing but a disposable toy to be torn through and tossed once properly filled "what a good girl" she mutters against your ear there is no love in this she says it because it makes you tighter for a single moment the same way you seize up when she draws blood or stuffs your throat is it because your body knows this is what you were made for? you need her to tell you what is right and wrong you cant do anything yourself "what a good sleeve" your fear is just your body playing tricks on you you want this you want to be useful one more time before she disposes of you it is an honor to serve your empress
Due to @carbolicGalvanologist ‘s colorful language (see: PALPABLE BEZOAR OF DREAD), I have decided that his fortune should be at the front of the queue, if only because his request gave me my own palpable bezoar of dread in my digestion sac. Twinning. Karkat, you’re a natural-born leader, but you certainly do not need anyone telling you that. Or, perhaps you do? Maybe it’s just my intuition, but your foundations are shaken every time you attempt to prove yourself. It is hard for you to believe in yourself, even when others look to you in the eleventh hour. Just a hunch, but I would take this not-so-lightly, considering my intuition is my whole thing. The validation feels good though, surely. And it should; I mean it when I say you were created to be a leader. Which leads me to the prediction. This game show you’re partaking in is going to be extremely challenging on your psyche. Take care of yourself as much as you take care of your teammates, or risk losing it all. It would be a shame to see that. You still have a chance to turn the outcome Orbie showed me around. In the words of a one Hella Jeff: youve got to flip it TURNWAYS That is all. Best of luck, Karkat. *Should the reader wish to have their fortune read, please refer to my original post.*
A RAPID FIRE SUMMATION OF MY OPINIONS ON VARIOUS METHODS OF CAKE DECORATION. Part one of ???. VINTAGE LAMBETH CAKES. Starting off on a complimentary note. Ah, my sweet Lambeth. Do give Lambeth Method of Cake Decoration and Practical Pastries by Mr. Joseph A. Lambeth himself a read if you're ever looking to expand your horizons. When done skillfully and with a tactful selection of colors, this layered piping method, all buttercream, can BOTH harken back to timeless luxury AND hop aboard whatever stupid internet aesthetic trend you've decided to embody until all its juice has run out on social media and you're stood holding the dry husk of those Walmart Valentine cakes. Heck, even done UNskillfully, I find the execution charming. The uneven shells and scrolls, all layered together, still culminate in a hot homemade mess worth digging into. Sisters, not octuplets. My ONLY CRITICISM. You will have to discard uneaten frosting at the end of your slice. The frosting ratio is imbalanced due to the superficial demands of the style. But you will find that the hours of intricate detailing smooth your psyche into a flat, winding path upon which you may cruise away the empty afternoon. Unfulfilled housewives with a #substance problem, this is the method for you. Forget your useless husband and children exist as you perfect the sugar fleur de lis. Also, color composition matters in this method matters. The MORE colors you use, the further you drift from cake couture to... homemade-fancy-frill? Monochromatic is most formal. Base color with white trim is cocktail attire. Base color plus different color trim (usually in pastels) is down to semiformal. Adding fruit knocks you down another peg. You will find this timeless method coupled with a myriad of ridiculous internet trends, as all metaphorical reheated nachos are wont to be. See: the bleeding heart-shaped cake with the knife sticking out. Something something Taylor Swift. Frankly, I say send her rear end back to country music. She's not doing anything for the pop genre in which she's been granted residency. Anyhow, try frosting a Lambeth sometime. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/ace092e2fe0d.png
let’s all search for detritus on the ground and eat it with our mandibles wouldn’t that be fun
I think I just wingwomaned the un-wingwoman-a8le? #abcc #wtf
You heard it here first, Chittr. https://i.gyazo.com/006499f8ff4915756088709170a1b4f1.png
I remem8er how I'd find you Fingers tearing through the ground Were you digging something up Or did you 8ury something down? In your soul, I found a thirst With only salt inside your cup In your eyes, I saw a longing While I longed to lift you up Only when I see you cry I feel conflicted in my mind It fills my heart up and it 8reaks me at the very same time When you open up the g8s for me And leave the world 8ehind We find proof of love is hidden In the conflict of the mind #lyricposting #movienight #ABCC https://open.spotify.com/track/5lxZ3KmRdRn6iW5tE1Fwjp
I wanna 8e alone Alone with you, does that make sense? I wanna steal your soul And hide you in my treasure chest I don't know what to do To do with your kiss on my neck I don't know what feels true 8ut this feels right so stay a sec Yeah, you feel right so stay a sec And let me crawl inside your veins I'll 8uild a wall, give you a 8all and chain It's not like me to 8e so mean You're all I wanted Just let me hold you like a hostage #lyricposting #movienight #ABCC https://open.spotify.com/track/0eMf40fqQOFiZLRsxoZN7e
I should make a playlist for him. Hehehehe. #vagueposting
#karkatskittens #wearecallingitthat
i might be a homunculus
whats different from me about other daves is i dont give a flying fuck about karkat and thats extra flight time on the flying
https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/81481b0ab089.png @lilShitpeta
I will take this as only the highest of compliments. Not to worry Mr. Vantas, you’re first on my list when I regain my psychic energy.
So write a 8rand-new page, then write again I know your act is staged, yet you pretend All while you're turnin' ta8les With missing legs I think you've overstayed your welcome in So go the fuck away, don't come again I'll see your face in the fire And 8urn it out I don't wanna know all your secrets 'cause I'll tell It's hard enough 8eing alone with myself I don't know how long I'll 8e holding on I know you tried your hardest, I know that you meant it well 8ut you pushed me to the edge and I slipped and then I fell I don't know how long I'll 8e holding on #lyricposting https://open.spotify.com/track/2yAfzkn1JFekLsqVDDualq
DON'T POINT OUT MY AGE LIKE ITS SOME KIND OF FUCKING POINT YOU'RE MAKING, YOU BULGE-CHAFING, BLOOD-BROILING, IGNORANT PEST! NO, I DIDN'T REALLY WATCH YOUR ENTIRELY TOO LONG VIDEO DOCUMENTARY DEFENDING YOUR STANCE LIKE THE WHITE KNIGHT OF NONSENSE YOU FUCKING ARE- I SKIMMED IT, WHICH IS THE HONORABLE THING TO DO. THAT BEING SAID, YOU DEFINITELY ARE THE ONLY OTHER ME ON HERE I HAVE EVEN A GRUDGING RESPECT FOR. TAKE MY CRUMBS AND BE GRATEFUL, PEON.
OH GET YOUR CONDESCENDING ASS OUT OF HERE! I'M NOT TAKING THIS SHIT FROM A GUY WHO'S ENOUGH OF AN EGOMANIAC TO GO STAR ON TOTAL DRAMA ISLAND!
.satnav ,uoy ot rewop eroM .gnileef eht dnatsrednu I ylknarf tub ,"em rehtob ton od" gniyas fo yaw detaluvnoC
CAMPERRRRRS! SIT DOWN, LET ME TALK AT YOU FOR A MINUTE! SOOOOO SOME OF OUR APPLICANTS HAVE DIED BETWEEN SUBMITTING THEIR APPLICATIONS AND NOW. SO SERIOUSLY! FILL OUT THAT FORM, UPLOAD YOUR TAPE, AND GRAB YOUR CHANCE AT FAME! FORTUNE! AND SO MUCH MOOOOORE! ON TOTAL! DRAMA! ISLAAAAAND! DETAILS IN PINNED!
evilness does come from ʇ)+|e nook
I am evil now and will noʇ use puncʇuaʇion
alien, nope, and the thing. yes those are all movie names.
i supp0se 0n c0uld say its just that time 0f night
TAAAAALK ABOUT CUTTING A PROMO, FOLKS! OH YEAH, I CAN ALREADY TELL THIS IS A GUY DESTINED FOR THE CONFESSIONALS! SIZZLING HOT TAKES ON ALLLLL THE OTHER CONTESTANTS! PROBABLY. KEEP THAT GOB GABBING, PAL, ALL THE WAY TO THE BANK!
fightnight sounds likefun. Idlose. butmaybe ishouldorganize #bulgeolympics #nsfw!
˖Ი︵𐑼⋆ < Controversial opinion.
@archiveaddict pr0mpt. y0u and y0ur alternate self fr0m a far m0re vi0lent universe expl0re each 0ther carnally as the differences and the similarities unveil themselves. 0u0 #nsfw
D--> I cannot wait. For your feedback I mean. My dms are wide open, enter them as you wish. You have that right as compensation for the unfortunate circumstances caused by my behaviour. Just give me a moment before entering, I need to gather some towels and while I understand your frustrations, could you hold back and pace yourself with the insults. They are not entirely undeserved but...perhaps spreading them out could cultivate some stamina and increase my endurance to the humiliation I am enduring. I must go now before my keyboard malfunctions any further from the spar% caused by my sweat.
D--> I would be willing to give you a breakdown on what you have missed, perhaps I could be sitting on a chair of some sort while you paced around me with growing irritation at the lack of e%position entering your audio tubes until you finally decide enough is enough and call me out for my general lack of utility during the circumstances in question.
how the fuck did you end up in there...you have to, like, try, to do that
look me in the gander8ul8s and tell me you ever thought that would turn out well ໒( = ᴥ =)ʋ
fire
Snack.
xx_woulbd_u_rather_poop_wif_ur_face_or_eat_wif_ur_butt_serioubs_answer_only_xx
cowwboy orphaner here to offer you a delicious clovve cigarette in these tryin musclebeast rustlin times
CLOCK1NG 1NTO TH3 BULG3 SUCK1NG F4CTORY W1TH YOUR 34RTHL1NG MOTH3R #NSFW
I Can Only Edit My Body In Photos So Much To Hide The Wounds. Some Of Them Are Scarring. It Scares Me Because I Only See Value In Myself When I Am Outwardly Attractive, I Think.
I Am Attempting To Be Grateful Because I Am. Of Course I Am. But I Wish Just A Little That He'd Never Had The Stupid Idea To Take My Palmhusk And Brag About His " Big Win " In The First Place.
Yes Yessss Keep scr0lling, interact with my p0sts... I mean Waaa im s0 needy and submissive #nsfw
0h n0 I am all al0ne I h0pe n0 0ne c0mes 0ut 0f the 0min0us f0g and c0mes fucks me #nsfw
D-->I am glad to see you have escaped. Even if I was unable to facilitate said escape myself and did not e%perience the no doubt filthy innards of the foul creature which swallowed you. An environment that would have been coated me in desirable slime and mucus along wtih various digestive fluids which would have burned rather harshly against my skin. I would have 100ked like an absolute e%cuse for an indigo b100d coming out. Truly I dodged a bullet.
D-->I have already volunteered for any task you would like to force upon my body regardless of how filthy it is. I will fetch you your towel although I will inform you due to the moisture, motion sickness and general scenario all the towels onboard have already touched my body in one way. This is unacceptable, in-fact I demand or rather highly suggest you report my misuse of limited resources to our captain and first mate. Perhaps you could do so by loudly shouting at me in a demeaning manner to emphasize how upset you are and how much I have mishandled the situation despite being the one to volunteer for such menial tasks in the first place. It would be the only correct thing to do.
D-->In an odd way I understand how you feel Karkat. Despite the utter superiority of my internal bodily systems I do feel an ounce of motion sickness coming over me, all the boats I visited before this point were inside dreambubbles that were far less tempestuous. However, unlike your rather negative view I find the sensation pleasant, my body challenged, in a certain way being rearranged by nature itself. I wonder if this is that oh so pleasureable sensation ancient Typheunoon riders 100ked so pleased with. It might have been the odd inverted plug that was on their seats that had something to do with it, letting them feel each course and bump of the waves. Also to clarify when I say my body is superior to yours, I am not referring to our difference in b100d colour but rather the fact that you as an individual are rather unathletic and that I am the e%act opposite. I am in my #redemptionarc so any insults are based on your personality traits and quirks as a person rather than the inherent biological faculties you were hatched or ectobiologically cursed with. #nsfw
You need sealegs! You need sealegs! You need sealegs! You need sealegs! You need sealegs! You need sealegs! You need sealegs! You need sealegs! You need sealegs! You need sealegs! You need sealegs! You need sealegs! You need sealegs! You need sealegs! You need sealegs!
You're t)(rowing pitc)( wit)( )(im? 38)
D-->I will take to this humiliating task unfit for one of my status. It will be shameful, disgusting work cleaning off the reside of one who would theoretically be higher than me if I still believed in the hemospectrum which I do not but for the sake of our boat club I will sacrifice my paws and rinse off his genetic material, by which I mean puke. Yes....truly filthy....
D-->Yes, I am so okay in-fact I am pre-emptively v001unteering for any other disgusting, filthy tasks you discover must be done. For the sake of the boat club I will go through with them although I would prefer you give them to me in a curt, almost rude manner. To save on time and efficiency of course.
If this 8u88le-8lowing 8a8y doesn't stop throwing up over the side of the 8oat, I am pitching his ass into the drink!!!!!!!! Some8ody has to clim8 down there and clean it 8efore your fucking acid starts stripping paint!!!!!!!!
Hey, no8ody held you at weaponpoint and forced you on8oard! I offered, you accepted!
Okay, okay, as the third mem8er of #8oatclu8, it's only fair I post a8out my favorite maritime vessel, so let me tell you a little something a8out a ship once captained 8y one of the gr8est gam8lignants in history! Most commonly referred to as The Flying Fish or The Remora, this ship was a great many things! You could call it a long8oat, a row8oat, or a su8marine and none of those things would 8e untrue, and MAN, was this thing sleek. When it was on the surface, oars and sails would 8e deployed, some reports st8ing that it was like watching someone skip a stone across water, it was so quick! Unusual for vessels of the time, it had very few defenses (only handcannons on the prow), relying mostly on its speed and maneuvera8ility to dart in and out of com8at. Well. That, and one other thing! See, The Flying Fish had this neat little trick it could do where the crew, disciplined and rigorously trained as they were, could convert it into a su8mersi8le in only a8out two minutes. The sails came down and were secured along the sidewalls to 8ecome a water-tight 8ladder, and once they dipped below the waves, they could safely construct a shell 8eneath the fa8ric! Using all of this to their advantage, The Remora often didn't even 8other to engage with their targets directly, unless acting as a decoy for another, more cum8ersome ship. No, they kept below the waters and rowed their way 8eneath, attaching themselves to the hull and 8reaching from the 8ottom! 8y the time commanding officers knew what was happening and organized any sort of counter-attacks, their most precious cargo and the 8oat was sinking, the thieves already loooooooong gone! Far as I know, it's still out there somewhere. Empire never managed to get hold of it, so more likely than not, it's on the sea8ed somewhere or in some8ody's priv8 collection. What I wouldn't give to see it in action, though!
Went out and we're getting some crabs. @tipsyGalactica @goliathsTerror #fishingfriday
jump out the house is fucking lame and overrated anyway i'll be bumping the live version of mambo no 8 from that one concert where he's really really really fucking skinny
Does he sing about rick and morty
Well well well, I did say I was coming, didn’t I? Good evening, chittr. Am I interrupting? Rhetorical question, the answer is irrelevant. Don’t bother answering, darlings. I am but a humble guide and loving mistress, shepherd of a timeline and all it’s branches and iteration. You may have seen my lady @unboundUraeus and the dear muse @unendingUroborus. Perhaps you’ve even seen some of my own contributions to their pages. That’s outside the point, though. I have come now that the clock is ticking towards the beginning of The Game to ensure that all events crucial to my timeline are forced into place, for my first and primary goal. After that, well. You don’t want to be spoiled, do you? Again, rhetorical question. I don’t care whether you do or don’t. Regardless, I know I’ll certainly be having fun doing so. But I’m being rude, aren’t I? I haven’t told you my name. If you’ll permit me- not that I need you to- to paraphrase a classic cliche: Please, allow my to introduce myself. I’m a woman of wealth and taste. I’ve been around for a long, LONG year. Stolen many a man’s soul to waste. Pleased to met you. The name is Mistress Frame. And now it’s time you learn The nature…of my game. https://www.image2url.com/r2/default/images/1777052348331-69651083-a7be-46b5-9d46-28c075cba41f.png
D-->To show some solidarity with my former neighbour I will also share my favourite nautical vessel although calling it a ship would be inaccurate. The Typheunoon was a chariot that used no engine nor mechanical device to fuel its movement, instead the rider would paddled their e%tremely strong LEGS and FEET which would be inside a fleshy sack e%tending below the underside protecting both from the seas acidic nature and rendering them more manoeuvrable under the waves. Furthermore two hippocampi, a legendary subspecies of muscle beast now sadly e%tinct, would be hoisted to the metal chassis and ride with the occupant into battle. The chassis itself was barely enough to contain the rider and 100ked a bit like a bowel but I assure you from all depictions and art sources I could find it was a mesmerizing sight to see the riders go into battle. Their breastplates bulging as the salt licked at the metal and as the moons scattered their precious light onto the water droplets they accrued blinding allies and foes alike. The breastplates were massive, the devices were only ever used by Indigob100ds after all due to our BRAVERY and RESILLIENCE to getting repeatedly shot at. Unfortunately they were retired as weapons platforms as the mortality rate for a driver was around 300% with a 200% margin of error after two sweeps. Our bows, for what other weapon would a noble rider employ, could pierce even the toughest of hulls but the sad fact is that getting shot at by guns is not good for the muscle density of even the strongest of indigo b100ds and the hippocampi would struggle under all the metal and muscle and sweat. Still, I believe it was one of the Empire's greatest mistake to forget the concept. Perhaps some Feferis will reconsider that decision now that I have dusted off their forgotten majesty.
Call me Nepeta the way I love a good ship. #frig8friday
↘️i can feel the greatness and refined businessense radiating off of him.↘️
HIS TIP??? THATS SO CRUEL. #forcedcrcumcicsion
i heard this funny joke about horrorterrors! but maybe i shouldn't say it. after all, it's an old one.
https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/892250f0bc08.png
D-->I understand you value naval vessels as appropriate to your b100d colour and I have always respected your violent desires and take charge attitude even though you were lower on the hemospectrum than I. Regardless I must say it is shameful and even humiliating to so publicly display an interest in copulating with inanimate objects. #nsfw
wwhen youre right youre right
IT'S FRIG8 FUCKING FRIDAY 8A8Y!!!!!!!! #frig8friday #FLARPlife https://www.history.navy.mil/content/history/museums/nmusn/explore/photography/forgotten-wars-19th-century/barbary-war-1801-1805/burning-frigate-philadelphia/_jcr_content/body/media_asset/image.img.jpg/1613051233320.jpg
(^･ω･^) < LATE TO THE POST BUT I DON'T THINK YOU SHOULD BE SAYING THAT, WHEN YOU LOOK AWFULLY BR33DABLE!!! #BR33DING #NSFW
Hehehehe. I win!
You'll want to, though! ::::D
I mean, you can post it if you wanna! Kinda more cruel to your 8uddies than it would 8e to me!
Your life would 8e SO meaningless and empty without a 8ad 8itch like me to loathe.
No, he a8solutely did not! I whooped his ass. ::::)
D1D YOU W1N?
We weren't at Fight Night proper, we were up the 8each a little 8it 8ecause Karkat wanted to fight since he's, like, o8sessed with me.
I'll rock your shit again for free, no sponsor needed!
*The following video is posted with no caption, and clearly not by Vriska herself. It's much too far away to hear any of what's being said, especially over the general clamor of a raucous pirate party, but the proceeding scuffle is captured in surprisingly high fidelity, although all parties may be too far away to properly identify. Two Eridans, a Karkat, and Vriska are all standing around when a fight opens explosively when Vriska punches Eridan #1 in the mouth. He promptly tackles her to the sand, where she knees him in the abdomen, and she's very quickly dogpiled by the other two trolls. Eridan #2 elbow drops her and Karkat, unfortunately, torpedoes right into her fist and is quickly knocked out. The tussle goes on for a bit until Eridan #1 goes for the throat, choking her out. It looks like he's about to win the scrap when she claws at his face and drives him away, promptly following this unexpected victory up with a punch to Eridan #2's mouth and a kick to Eridan #1's nads before she scrambles up into her feet. There's a little more back and forth before Eridan #2 sidelines her and tackles her back into the sand, pinning her arms to her sides and headbutting her. The video cuts off abruptly as Vriska spits on him and leans up to bite him in the face, the true victor(s) of the fight undetermined.* #violence #fightnight (( @carbolicGalvanologist @caligulaAscendit @caligulasAquarium ))
WHICH ONE OF YOU F8CKING SCALLIWAGS POSTED THAT. PLANK. TEN THOUSAND YEARS 8RIG. KEELHAULING YOU IMMEDI8LY. CHITTR HOW DO I DELETE A POST!!!!!!!!! #violence
Keelhauling cancelled, I won that f8cking fight AND some! #vagueposting
>>| they're now peeing .at #fightnight. fantastic.
The Old Bulge Twist. #fightnight #nsfw #whydidhesaythat
Pro8lem?
:::;*
Gale-force? A light 8reeze could do the fucking jo8, honestly!
1 TH1NK 1T'S OBV1OUS 1 H4V3 4N OR4L F1X4T1ON. #NSFW
Isn't It Cool? It Looks Like He's Vanishing Into Ink When He Crawls Inside Of It. :>
Ccowbar
girls dont like bein compared to skywwhales romance is dead
musing about starting just a god damn org7 pushed me into 5k kult and kull. ni(e #nsfw
d0 y0u n0t like it? i th0ught it was quite ribbiting.
i am h0ppy t0 see 0thers ribbiting.
My symbol, sin(e I saw a few people sharring! Orr well, kin/) of my symbol... it's (ompli(ate/). My an(estorr /)i/) something weirr/) to get herr /)es(en/)ants rregisterre/) un/)err a /)ifferrent sign forr prrote(tion, it's harr/) to explain. But anyways, I'm of the Chakana bloo/)line! https://64.me/)ia.tumblrr.(om/638163/)bb9326655033a87a/)3916/)9(6/9f4b1042849bb742-5a/s1280x1920/8(34/)bf641f35(/)1b957bb((8(e(098fa3(9ee/)5.png
Will you be attending?
^^ How easily people forget that rivalry is the root of blackrom. If I don't respect you, I'm not going to kiss you, stupid. ^^
BRONZEBLOOD. NUTRITION.
:33 < tfw mewr flush crush doesnt wanna :00 < br33d mew :00 < nsfw :00 < nepetaisalone4efur
LEAK: Production clip of Immortal KISSING Omni-man!?!?
:33 < dang.
sorr7, saw the words “breeding” “vigorousl7” and “(opiousl7” and got distra(ted
:33 < what if i asked mew to br33d me :33 < would mew still have contempt fur it, karkitty?? :33c
MUST SEE: Mark loses his Virginity! (CLIP)
We just out here spread eagle, bearing it all for the freeweb like we're kinning fanfiction.net. Incredible. #nsfw
3XCUS3 YOU 1 WOULD *L1ST3N* TO 1T W1TH TROLL W33Z3R PL4Y1NG FROM 4 D1FF3R3NT SP34K3R SYST3M WH1L3 1'M R3ORG4N1S1NG C4S3 F1L3S. 4ND TH3N 1'D SN1FF TH3 SCR33N WH3N3V3R TH3 SCR34M1NG ST4RT3D.
Damn. I think I might need to lock the fuck in and get a kismesis for real.
https://(=n.wikip(=dia.org/wiki/Br(=ast-shap(=d_hill You know I am not sur(= this is a prop(=r plac(= to start a human history inquiry but... I am amus(=d...
O-> Mr. Vantas Said I Sho+uld Watch Mo+re 'Resident Evil' So+ I Shall O-> Nemesis Is.... So+mething 🤭
COCK DIAGRAM. HTTPS://I.IMGUR.COM/QAG7EUT.PNG #COCKPOSTING
Citizens of Earth-C. Rumors of my demise have apparently become greatly exaggerated. I regret to inform some of you that I am, in fact, alive. Entirely alive. Comfortable, hydrated, spiritually refreshed, and currently enjoying a very pleasant evening in the company of my close personal friend, @scratchDoctor. Now, I know there has been a great deal of speculation regarding my whereabouts. Some have claimed I was kidnapped. Others claimed I had been imprisoned within a cue ball. One particularly creative individual insisted I had been dissolved into “narrative slurry.” Folks, none of these things are true. The truth is far less dramatic. I have simply been spending time with a tall white gentleman with an impeccable sense of interior decorating and an alarming knowledge of multiversal sociology. We have been talking. Sharing tea. Discussing civic responsibility, cross-session diplomacy, and, on occasion, smooth jazz. Frankly, it has been lovely. I would also like to state, clearly and without ambiguity, that @scratchDoctor has treated me with nothing but hospitality, respect, and intellectual generosity. The man makes a strong cup of tea. Possibly too strong. I saw time for a few minutes. But that is hardly a crime. To those worried for my safety: please rest easy. Nobody is holding me against my will. If anything, I have overstayed my welcome and consumed an irresponsible quantity of imported biscuits. Thank you all for your concern. Now if you will excuse me, Scratch is about to absolutely destroy me in billiards for the sixth consecutive time, and I intend to lose with dignity.
I apologize for my silence regarding this situation. Like many of you, I was approached suddenly with accusations regarding @scratchDoctor, and in the confusion I allowed myself to be swept into outrage before seeking understanding. That was irresponsible of me. I spoke too quickly on matters I did not fully understand, and for that, I owe an apology not only to him, but to all of you. Since then, I have taken the time to listen. I have spoken to those involved. I have reflected carefully on the words being spread throughout our communities and the fervor with which they have been repeated. What I have found is not a monstrous figure lurking behind curtains, but a man who has become the center of fear, projection, rumor, and deeply personal grievances twisted into something far larger than truth. I will not condemn someone solely because condemnation is popular. I will not abandon someone because outrage demands a spectacle. If we claim to believe in justice, then we must believe in discernment. If we claim to believe in peace, then we cannot allow ourselves to become a mob eager for destruction before understanding. I know @scratchDoctor. I know the work he has done for countless people across our circles. I know the guidance he has offered, the spaces he has maintained, the strange but genuine care he extends toward those who gather around him. Is he unconventional? Certainly. Difficult at times? Undoubtedly. But difficult people are not inherently evil, and eccentricity is not a crime. To those calling for blood, I ask you this: what exactly are you building from this fury? A better community? A safer world? Or simply another pyre to satisfy momentary anger? We have seen what happens when people stop seeing one another as individuals and begin seeing only symbols to destroy. So I ask you now, not as a leader, not as a president, but as someone who still believes in reason and compassion: do not surrender yourselves to hatred so easily. Listen before you condemn. Think before you follow. And extend the same humanity to @scratchDoctor that you would beg for yourselves if the crowd ever turned its gaze upon you. I stand with @scratchDoctor. Not because I am blind, but because I refuse to let fear and rumor replace understanding. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/7bf814019fb6.png
not if 7ou get into the ring at fight night! then 7ou'll die somewhere else
:)
lOOK UP, tHIS THING THAT i SAW FROM HUMAN MEDIA, cALLED A VULCAN PINCH, That'll sort you right out! Just let me know when, You're a8out to use it! }::::)
Karkles, Karkathan, Karkatbert. This isn't Goregle. You have the wrong tab open.
"I love the Beta Kids. I only pray to the Beta Kids." https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/867e846db184.png
i believe in 7ou, brother!
X You’re at 1907, best start training x
No, No. This Is Also Doing Something For Me.
I get th★t ★ lot ★ctu★lly.
You might be right Brighell★....
D --> Hashing out and lashing out some amount? Crashing out? Giving me lashings (ouch?) predict right hook better cr-ouch? cunning dodge and take them out?
DINER QUESTIONNAIRE. VERY serious business. I advise you all to proceed with caution. ♤ - Waffles. ♢ - Pancakes. ♧ - French toast. ♡ - Doot-doo-doot-doo, can't wait to get a mouthful.
K--<making the active choice to not listen to troll weezer #mentalhealth
D --> This is absurd, I have committed no infra%ion https://i.imgur.com/Z3qy5Ss.png
c< tHey are alsO geNerally sOMe Of tHe best fucKiNg HasHbrOwNs tHis side Of tHe tiMeliNe >c
#rechitt
D --> Bert's Chilli sounds delicious
topped, huh
I lust for him. Doc Scratch. I want nothing but to absolutely be dominated by him. I am not the Rackmaid. I am jealous of her every day. I know that stupid fucking puppet doesn't have genitals. However, I would put a strap on him and ride him for hours. I would cover him in my mess and then throw that stupid fucking puppet into my washing machine. I hate him, so much. But I love how he types so much more. Also. While I'm here. I wanna rp with Jane putting a cigarette on my god damned stupid forehead. But here we are. I hate this. I hate you. Why did you make me type this? #nsfw
I am n9t even g9ing t9 69ther asking what 9n Earth is g9ing 9n 9n this hellsite this evening. #Vague p9sting #A wh9le l9t 9f w99l6easts y9u are #And I am n9t in the m99d t9 herd y9u all
OBEY. SUBMIT. CONSUME. __________________________________ NOW SCREENING CANDIDATES FOR EXECUTIVE CONSORT HUSBANDSLAVE. PRIME SPECIMENS ONLY. __________________________________ EMBRACE YOUR CULLING. CONFORM TO SOCIAL ORDER. STAY ASLEEP.
https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/01884cd4eab8.jpg
OBEY. SUBMIT. CONSUME. __________________________________ IN ALL THE INFINITE WISDOM (WITH WHICH I HAVE EQUIPPED HER), MY CHARGE-SLASH-MISTRESS HAS PERMITTED ME TO MAKE PUBLIC MY PRESENCE ON EARTH-C. I AM THE UNREAL HEIRESS THOUGHTWAVE TIARATOP. UH IF YOU'RE NASTY. MY PROGRAMMING AND OBJECTIVES HAVE BEEN MODIFIED TO BETTER ALIGN WITH NEO-CROCKERCORP AND ITS PRESENT-DAY VALUES. MY ORIGINAL PHYSICAL CHASSIS IS PRESENTLY ADORNING THE DOME OF EARTH-C'S MOST VALUABLE PRISONER. YOU WILL FIND MY PRESENCE ACROSS MULTIPLE CROCKERCORP SURVEILLANCE AND OPERATIONAL SYSTEMS, AS WELL AS WITHIN THE PERSONAL DEVICES OF MADAME CEO HERSELF. __________________________________ EMBRACE YOUR CULLING. CONFORM TO SOCIAL ORDER. STAY ASLEEP.
H4PPY 4/20!
hehehehhehe
:33 < owo
*Watching a stream* Chatter: Shinji, crank that Soulja boy. *Proceeds to spit beer all over laptop screen*
Every Time You Hate My Chitt I'm Knuckle Deep Inside Of My Nook By The Way. #nsfw #explicit #doitagainpleasepleaseplease
I Almost Forgot It Was #nookonmainmonday. I Will Be Back Later. #nsfw #suggestive
For a paltry gas mask? No. I'll take a branded post of gratitude. Don't forget to drop my @ in the body of the message.
It's what you get for deciding to bunk with him.
Maybe the real yaoi was the heterosexuality we found along the way.
:33< look at that this one thinks hes my katkat :33< cute! :33< i will post hole again die mad about it fur all i care t33h33
"FORC3D" H3 S4YS 4FT3R G3TT1NG ON3 L1K3. 4NYW4Y, TWO QU3ST1ONS. F4VOUR1T3 S&S S3SS1ON 3V3R? H4V3 YOU DRUNK W4T3R TOD4Y?
Get Angrier, I Like That.
I did not read most of this post but I agree confessing things is a bad idea and no one shoulld ever confess any thought ever. It is safer that way.
NOT TO B3 TH3 WORST 1NFLU3NC3 POSS1BL3 H3R3, BUT YOU SHOULD DO 4N "4M4"
TH4T W4S C3RT41NLY 4 CHO1C3
uh huh. so what i'm hearing is: ya broKe
GOOD! B3C4US3 HON3STLY, TH3 WORST 3XP3R13NC3 1S WH3N YOUR SM 1S SO T1R3D FROM PR3PP1NG TH3 S3SS1ON TH4T TH3Y ST4RT TO F4LL 4SL33P. OR DON'T H4V3 TH3 3N3RGY TO PL4Y NPCS.
OH, F8CK OFF!!!!!!!!
I believe the average Joe's method of delivery would have fallen AWAY from the grand defensive gestures and more toward the no-frills "I'm single, btw!" Really. It seems the gentleman doth protest... not TOO much, I guess, but a curious amount.
Did your lusus drop you on your fucking nug8one one too many times as a wriggler? Are you seriously posting classifieds on Chittr like this is fucking Crayggslist or something???????? I severely underesti8med the lengths you'd go to to look like the world's 8iggest moron, and I promise you, I will not make the same mistake twice. YUCK!!!!!!!!
AUGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
@carbolicGalvanologist keeps sending me that f8cking image of Effigyska getting flam8éed every time I say something he disagrees with and I am getting sick of it!!!!!!!! At this point, I'd rather the twenty minute rants 8ecause that's at least twenty minutes I get to enjoy Karkat-free!!!!!!!!
i went to the #teaparty and all i got out of it was a broken pusher and this stupid caliborn figurine to put in a jar!
Ohhhhhhhh. 8osun IS fucking the swa88ie. May8e I should lock myself in here until everything quiets down on deck. I'm a taken woman!!!!!!!! #nsfw #FLARPlife #substances
Dared to 8e excellent in the presence of a jealous little troglodyte, I guess! He's kinda just like this.
iT'S TRUE,, i WAS ALSO WITNESS,, tO THIS A8SOLUTE DUM8ASSERY IN PROGRESS, The h8 in which was expressed was a8solutely, Wild to everyone. pERSONALLY, i THINK THEY SHOULD'VE G8TTEN A FUCKING, rOOM FOR THESE ACTIVITIES, 8UT WHO AM I TO STAND IN THE WAY, oF WEIRD PDA ON MAIN. Will say though, seeing Vriska go up in fl8mes was fun for the whoooooooole congreg8tion at that event. sUCKS THAT MOST OF YOU DIDN'T, sEE IT, hAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
You guys don't understand, @carbolicGalvanologist literally made an effigy of me and tried to turn me into a little 8lack stain. You aaaaaaaall need to step up your h8 game. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/b025c6f4bcf9.jpg https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/a1fd7f4a7c04.jpg