KALLUM VANTAS
@cheekyGit
DO ME A FAVOR AND GIVE ME A PINT OR BUGGER OFF FOR ME MATE. #COMEONALTERNIA
nvm spending crazy money over 8oys are coming to my hive
THAT’S LESS CRAZY, MORE ODD.
well they're like 20 8ucks each and Evidet said 30 so
YOU’RE BUYING GUYS FOR 20 CAEGARS EACH? GUYS? 20 CAEGARS?
nO NOT NO NO MY GAM8LING. I WAS 8UYING OUIOUIS. THERE IS NOW A REAL LIFE TROLLIAN MAN COMING TO MY HIVE FOR UNRELATED REASONS
HOW MUCH DID YOU PAY THE TROLLIAN MAN? 20 CAEGARS??
NO !! !! !! !! NO I INVITED HIM OVER !! !! !! !! !!HE'S A FRIEND OF MINE
YOU COERCED HIM WITH 20 CAEGARS TO BE A “FRIEND”???
HE GAVE ME TWENTY QUID TO PICK UP SOMETHING NICE BEFORE I SHAG HIM SILLY FOR THE NIGHT MATE, HOP OFF IT. IM NOT A FUCKING TART THOUGH SO ILL GIVE IT BACK TO HIM LATER x
holyshit
I see my 8uge and suddenly all is colourful
“OU”. O FUCKING U. THIS IS KALLUM’S FAULT.
this makes it sound like it'll happen more than the once are you coming over.
“MORE THAN ONCE” HE SAYS WHEN IT ALREADY BLOODY HAS. YEAH I’LL COME BY. x
It's another race that will have to be called early, Candy Corn appears to be quite popular among the populace. It advances on. For this next matchup we have Swedish Fish (Red Reacts) VS. Percy Pigs (Black reacts)
(I'm only including Percy pigs in this list because @carbolicGalvanologist and @creaticGoeticist bullied me into it)
i knew there was riggory afoot some motherfucking japery up in this bitch
DON’T GO BLAMING ME, ASSWIPES. PERCY PIGS AND GERRY GRUBS ADJACENT ARE IN FACT SUPERIOR. @CHEEKYGIT IS RIGHT ABOUT THIS AND THIS ONLY.
two words raspberry licorice
Neχt troll that 2ay2 i'm not real becau2e im briti2h. I 2wear they're never gonna 2top φinding you. #violence_mention
@cheekygit do you know this guy
※ KNOWTICE: Everytbody knows when you're drinking on Nubday, its' a Nuibday. Happy Nubday. Gold Shipping Char t Nubday. She won. I love you . - Interested in learning mmore? ;-) <> c3< #HandyProTisp #HandProTips
@cheekyGit can you read this or is it fully illegi8le. you're my last hope
MATE I CAN’T READ TIT FROM THE TAT I THINK IT’S A LOST CAUSE x
HONEST TO EVERYTHING, SOME OF YOU LOT ARE AS USEFUL AS A FUCKING CHOCOLATE TEAPOT. x
I can wring blood from this stone easy-style. Watch this. A chocolate teapot provides novelty entertainment, at the very least. These guys can't even give us that much, "bruv".
WAIT. YOU NEED TO MAKE SURE THAT ARSE @CARCINOGENETICIST#4881 SEES THIS. HE’S ALWAYS WHINGEING ABOUT HOW I’M THE SHITTEST OF THE SHIT. TAKE THAT YOU FUCKING SAUSAGE. x
Peep the word offshoot. You're a pitiful clone of a dude I'm not even particularly fond of. We've got to use our context clues here, dogg.
ARE YOU DONE BEING A FUCKING WIND UP OR CAN WE JUST CALL IT LIKE WE BOTH SEE IT AND SAY I’M THE FUCKING BOSS? #BOSH x
YOU'RE A DISGUSTING FUCKING SHADOW SENT BY PARADOX SPACE TO TORMENT ME SPECIFICALLY. I MUST DO SOMETHING REALLY FUCKING IRRETRIEVABLY HORRIBLE IN THE FUTURE, OR SOME OTHER TIMELINE, THAT MEANS THAT *I* HAVE TO BE PUNISHED HERE AND NOW BY TALKING TO YOU.
anyway unrelated 8ut @cheekyGit you're a8out to 8e 8owled under the motherfucking ta8le with how much more I can drink than you
YOU THINK YOU CAN OUT DRINK A BEFORISH LAD???? YOU’RE OFF YOUR KNOB MATE. x
I will not 8e doing my ama for #floridfriday tonight 8ecause I need to go out and hunt for my 8uge first and then I'm going out DRINKINGGGGG
HAPPY FRIDAY YOU TOSSERS, I’M TOO BUSY FOR A FIGHT BECAUSE I’M GETTING ABSOLUTELY FUCKING DOUBLE DECKERED FROM ALL THESE PINTS I’M KNOCKING BACK, WHOEVER WANTS TO SNOG INSTEAD, HIT MY FUCKING LINE x
twirls my hair
YOU WERE JUST THE LAD I WAS HOPING TO SEE TONIGHT XXXXXXX x
you aren't ready for me to outdrink you 8tw
got kicked out of maccies for vaping youre having a pisstake man
SHOULDN’T HAVE BEEN BLASTING YOUR FLIPPIN CANCER BEAM IN THE MACCIES MATE I WAS TRYING TO HAVE MY CHICKEN BURGER MEAL AND IT WAS REALLY HARSHING THE VIBES. x
GIVE THIS ONE AN EAR WAG BRUV. SET YOU RIGHT. BLUR, THE ABSOLUTE MANIACS, FUCKING HELL, BEST SONG TO EVER EXIST. x
wait are they playing slaps in the music video?
hope youre ready for some red raw knucks dude
AH, EXCEPT NOT SO FAST, BECAUSE BEFORISH SLAPS ARE DIFFERENT. WE SLAP YE CROSS THE GOB INSTEAD. GET READY FOR THE WIND UP. x
bro never say gob again holy shit lmao made me choke on my whiskey