KARKAT VANTAS
@creaticGoeticist
THE GUY WITH THE BEST FUCKING MOVIE BLOG IN THE INCIPISPHERE *AND* CO-HOST OF THE ADORABLOODTHIRSTY CINEMASSACRE CLUB, GMT/BST. >> THE BLOG: https://letterboxd.com/CGeneticist/ <<
B33 < *tc stretches and nyawns, opening their blearily eyes to take a p33p at chittr and* B33 < holy god B33 < last chitt THR33 MONTHS AGO B'33 < where has the time gone B33 < is rankmaid back is trollbama ok is shitpeta still shitting her petas all over the place B33 < blarghhhh i n33d to catch up on efurrything
SHITPETA IS, UNFORTUNATELY FOR LITERALLY ALL OF US, STILL SHITTING HER PETAS. IT REEKS.
*seasons crabdad with oldbay*
HEY, SO DO NOT FUCKING DO WHAT THAT IDIOT IN YOUR REPLIES IS SAYING. ZATARAIN’S IS MID. END OF.
IT'S LIKE YOU SPEAK EXCLUSIVELY IN A LANGUAGE WHERE EVERY WORD OUT OF YOUR SHOUTHOLE MEANS "PLEASE KICK MY ASS." AND GOOD FUCKING DAMN, DO YOU HAVE A WAY WITH WORDS.
I HAD TO LEARN IT FROM SOMEBODY, *AHEM*. #THESAMEGUY.
CRABDAD WOULD BE SAD IF HE HEARD YOU TALKING SHIT LIKE THIS TO HIS ONLY SON.
AND HE WOULD ALSO BE SAD TO SEE THAT YOU’D STOOP SO LOW AS TO SEASON HIM WITH FUCKING ZATARAIN’S. WHAT KIND OF RUN OF THE MILL, BOTTOM OF THE BARREL SHIT DO YOU THINK HE DESERVES. SHAME.
IF I WAS ONE PERCENT MORE EVIL AFTER PUTTING SO MANY EVIL HOURS IN AT THE EVIL FACTORY, I WOULD CHALLENGE YOU TO A FUCKING COOK-OFF WITH AS MANY DOOMED TIMECLONES OF HIM AS I COULD DREDGE UP. AND I'M GETTING MORE EVIL EVERY SECOND I TALK TO YOU. THIS CONVERSATION IS LITERALLY MAKING ME INTO A WORSE PERSON.
OH SO YOU BLAME *ME* FOR BEING AN ORNERY PIECE OF SHIT WHO USES OFF-THE-SHELF BELOW-GRADE SEASONINGS FOR OUR RESPECTIVE DEAD LUSII’S SEAFOOD BOIL??????? OKAY. OKAY YEAH. NO BECAUSE THIS ACTUALLY TRACKS FOR YOU. I’VE BEEN *TRYING* TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT YOUR EVIL OVERLORD BULLSHIT FOR ALMOST A WEEK NOW AND YOU GHOSTED ME, SO GUESS WHAT VANTAS? I’M GOING TO TEAM YOU ON YOUR TASTE IN SMOKED SALTS AND HERB BUTTERS INSTEAD.
WHAT IF I HAD BLUE HUMAN EYES. AND THE WORLD SHUDDERED.
DON’T YOU <> ME. YOU PILE OF WET SHIT TO THE FACE. I’M GOING TO GIVE YOU A NOOGIE OF EPIC PROPORTIONS. <> ASSHOLE.
OH NOW YOU’RE ASKING FOR IT. ANSWER YOUR PALMHUSK.
I'm scared
STOP BEING A WHINY PISS BABY WRIGGLER AND LOOK AT TROLL ZOOEY DESCHANEL’S HAUNTING BULBS.
That's what you look like
UNFORTUNATELY FOR YOU, NO I DON’T, I LOOK MUCH BETTER THAN THAT, JOKE RUINED. TELL A DIFFERENT ONE.
Do I look like your personal fucking jester
YOU SURE ACT LIKE IT SOMETIMES.
@AMBIVALENTGANGSTA IS HOSTING A BONFIRE TONIGHT. WHO’S COMING? I NEED TO KNOW HOW MANY OF THESE *VERY GOOD AND NOT BURNT* COOKIES TO BRING.
sure why n0t, i'll sh0w up and eat y0ur burnt c00kies, kk
THEY ARE NOT BURNT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OCCUPYING MY TIME AT @DOOMSDAYDOUBLED ’S HIVE, BECAUSE HE KEEPS BEATING ME AT SMASH AND I’M FUCKING SICK OF IT.
sitting there taking m0del sh0ts while making expl0ded buttery kernels. smh she's right y0u were "m0gging". but this is why i'm winning, kk, y0u g0tta get y0ur head in the game.
YOU HAVE TO BE A GOOD MOIRAIL AND LET ME WIN AT LEAST ONCE, YOU PRICK. THIS IS WHY I GAVE UP AND JUST DECIDED TO FOCUS ON THE ARGUABLY EASIER GIG OF SITTING PRETTY.
h0w can y0u get better if i let y0u win? besides y0u g0t really cl0se that 0ne r0und
… UGH. I HATE THAT YOU’RE RIGHT AND YOU’RE BEING SO DAMN ENCOURAGING. SHOW ME YOUR SECRET MOVES AND I’LL KEEP TRYING.
daves brief note on "camp" camp is the feast of the visual for the sake of it man. its the active choice to lean into the fantastical and silly with disregard to if its cringe unrealistic or nonsensical. actually nonsensical is the point. its taking an idea and just "yes and"-ing it into something bonkers as fuck, purely for the joy of it. usually used with comedic spins to entertain. moulin rouge is camp, rocky horror is camp, suckerpunch is camp, could you feasibly tell me what the actual plotlines of those movies really were after a first time watch? no. but you know those visuals and those songs are gonna stick in your brain. at the end of it really camp is highly subjective because to one person it comes across gauche as fuck and to another as whimsically strange and enjoyable also side note thats my submission to #abcc to make daves #campweek lineup with moulin rouge, rocky horror picture show and suckerpunch
GOOD TAKE. GREAT TAKE, EVEN. CHEWING ON THIS.
spit it the fuck out man
NO, IT’S MINE NOW.
alright man you can take a piece of it but leave the rest for everyone else
I'M TAKING THE REST AND CHEWING ON IT EVEN HARDER. AND YEAH. I COULD GNAW ON THIS SLOP FOR A WHILE. A WEEK, EVEN. A #CAMPWEEK. THE #ABCC-FILMLEADER COUNCIL WILL REVIEW YOUR PATHETIC SUBMISSION, STRIDER. AWAIT OUR COLD, GODLY JUDGEMENT LIKE AN EMACIATED FARMWRETCH PRAYING FOR RAIN TO WATER HIS GNARLED, WITHERED CROPS. AND THEN RAISE YOUR DUMB, DROOLING MAW TO THE SKY AND OPEN WIDE. BECAUSE A FLOOD IS COMING. IT'S COMING IN *HARD.*
THAT’S WHAT I SAID IN THE FORUM, ASSWIPE. I CALLED IT FIRST BEFORE YOU DID. FOR THE RECORD.