Eridan Ampora
@cthonicAspirations
twwelvve and a half swweeps | "recently" revvivved | blitherin annoyin meat heads dni | dm me for wwarhammer mini comms
and noww a passage i havve chosen for you all pulled out of the recovvered tome of a gallant and revvered knight of conquest, a hero of old alternia the gwwynvvere "Upon one night, my lady, thou dost drivve me to madness. Thou makest me furious, picking apart the little things I say or the manner of my dress. It maketh me yearn to run thee through! Some nights I lie awwake, haunted by thy face, and I cannot sleep. On nights like those, I find myself resolvving to givve thee a piece of my mind. I implore my courage to come wwith me, and I march to thy hivve to tell thee evverything I think is so deeply, deeply wwrong wwith thee. And then — mine eyes meet thine. By my troth, fair maiden, mine eyes doth lose the battle, and my heart payeth the price of the wwar levvies full dearly. In this wwar, I wwavve the wwhite flag of surrender — for thy face is too comely, thy hair too shining as spun silk, and thy undergarments too scant and tempting for a knight of honour to wwithstand. I answwer thee wwith Yes, my mate? WWhat dost thou require, my mate? and brace myself for the day ahead, as a vvassal before the lists." #poetry #flushromance #pitchromance #lightreading #suggestivve #archaic #finterature
did you evven read it i bet you did not evven read the poetry howw about you showw the gwwynvvere some respect for his craft i mean is this not so relatable
Si7 wi7h me. Ge7 real quie7 righ7[💎💎💎JACKPOT💎💎💎] now. Look a7 me. I do no7 give a shi7 wha7 you do or do no7 do. My advice is jus7 7ha7[🍋🍋🍋JACKPOT🍋🍋🍋]: advice. And s7op vagueing 7he chicks you like wi7h poe7ry you didn'7 even wri7e!!!!!!!
okay you are just jealous clearly wwhen wwas the last time katchi serenaded you wwith some poetry at least the shit i dig up is better then the bars he wwrites all you havve to do is ask
???????[❓❓❓JACKPO7❓❓❓][❓❓❓JACKPO7❓❓❓][❓❓❓JACKPO7[🔔🔔🔔JACKPOT🔔🔔🔔]❓❓❓]
is there supposed to be a cha ching somewwhere in here or wwas i supposed to just read betwween the lines
yknoww the thing about a shark shes got lifeless eyes black eyes like a doll’s eyes wwhen she comes after ya she doesn’t seem to be livvin until she bites ya and those black eyes roll ovver wwhite and then awwww then you hear that terrible pitch screamin the ocean turns red and in spite of all the poundin and the hollerin she comes in and rips ya to pieces #vvaguepost #pitchpoetry
࣪⊹₊˚{ iiii think you were only pretending to play it vague four this 1! }⟡u⟡{ NIIICE TRYYYY THOUGH! }~7~{ }~7~{ }~7~{ #dobettanexttime }˚₊⊹ ࣪
your fins are glossy beyond compare your teeth are sharp and predacious your gills are flush wwith prestigious and royal affluence and your hair shines like the highest crests a the wwavves under the expanse a the first mornin lights
does anybody else get extremely and concernedly aroused wwhen pretty girls stare at them wwith absolutely nothin on their big old dead eyes
SHE ROLLED TWWO FLIPPIN 20S IN A ROWW I THOUGHT IT WWAS A GOOD TIME
i swwear you take one phone call in the middle of a steamy pitch date and all of a sudden she is diggin her nails into the vveins atop your hands so hard you may as wwell havve permanent nail shaped scar marks noww #vvaguepost #pitchproblems
i am bored and i am in the mood to rate people according to a system i havve recently become obsessed wwith magic the gatherin comment under this post if you wwant me to assign you a magic card that i think encompasses your vvibe i am going to ATTEMPT to not use these blasted crossovvers but it is sorta inevvitable so wwe wwill see
You really got swarmed, 8ut you should have expected that. So many people here have hungry egos to feed.
wwoah second time someone says that to me gettin a little hot under the collar here id do you any time but sure lets try this card out https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/46db888aed0e.wwebp
trust me, eri. i wouldn’t be asking for it that way. :) also, pick a cuter one, this one looks boring!!!
UGH FINE here you go then take your cuteness bomb and be happy https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/cf2e13a876b3.wwebp
are you, like, holding back the baddies???? am i not worthy of being a baddie? ugh, i give up. these picks suck. >:(
YOU DONT UNDERSTAND ANYTHING fine fine fine i am rippin my fuckin hair follicles out you are the only one wwho hates your picks HERE see the colors evven fuse to make pink noww you go and try to tell me she is not a baddie https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/9273efabcd08.wwebp
biting my fingernail rn. hehe. i like this a lot, eri. good job!!
this is me by the wway if anyone evven cares https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/93e7d81ed7a4.jpeg
DELETE THIS VVILE WWOMAN THEY ARE JUST DOIN THEIR MANLY DUTY RAISIN THE YOUNG OKAY IT IS HONORABLE AND COOL
no no no no no no no no no okay do not let the leijons see this there is this one avvid caterwwauler she wwould NEVVER let this go
is it really #fishfuckfriday
FUCK MY CHUM LIFE wwait wwhy wwhat happened did one a us fuck up and say somethin uncouth
wwell wwhat do you think about it i mean surely you do not wwant to ignore such a sacred and cherished holiday and leavve a poor fish unattended i am joking mostly does it pique your interest
Um-- well, gosh. It IS rather curious, is it not? So many festive Fridays...!
oh yes yeah so many reasons to celebrate i mean it cannot be so wwrong to seek to havve some fun on a friday speakin of vvestra is it? i am unfamiliar wwith you but if you are unfamiliar wwith me may i suggest you come ovver for this #fishfuckfriday and wwe perhaps can get to knoww each other better tea maybe and some scones nothin else a course just celebratin life
oh okay im still eridan call me that but yes perhaps you should dm me wwith your univversal coordinates for my transportalizer
no one rate me or so help me i wwill scream
no iit wa2 actually pretty 2atii2fyiing 2iince ii'd never let 2omethiing that look2 liike you get that number.
I SAID DONT RATE ME STOP DOIN THAT SHIT oh this is vvile comin from another me wwhere the hell are you pointin that sub optimal ratin at
you wwant me to givve you the satisfaction a ratin you back so much but the truth a the matter is that i do not care about you nearly enough to put you on my scale plus knowwin you you wwould probably get your sticky honey excrements and bo all ovver my nice scale
fuck good point i still reject the entire notion a this stupid trend i mean let us both be honest wwith each o ourselvves wwe wwere ratin ourselvves and others before it wwas cool that is wwhat it means to be a hipster it is not my fault my evvery wword attracts sol to me like a buzzard
couldnt hear you ovver the spittle you flung at your keys there
is evveryone seriously ratin themselvves on a scale a one to ten unless this is some kinda wweird self confidence exercise (wwhich is a vvery odd thing to make public broadcast) that is some stuff i wwoulda dowwnright expected other mes to do seems vvery moronic chittr speeds rapidly evvery day towwards an unpleasant ouroboros
wwell sure good point but it is not like i can stop the ones wwho hate on me from commentin on my posts i mean this is a free platform to all but you knoww i think i can agree on one thing seems you are wworth keepin around non judgemental i appreciate that quality
actually it wwould havve been funnier if i replied to this post sayin ill havve you knoww i nevver feed my thoughts
nevver i got my thoughts chained up in a fuckin basement wwaterboardin them occasionally i wwill nevver feed my thoughts
instructions unclear i purchased gladiatorial armor on eflay does that count
nice try not that easy i just polished it it is still gleamin
fixed it @emptyEyes mood for tonight vversion 3 https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/ac36580b5eb5.jpeg
you knoww i havve to agree at first i wwas all like ugh wwhatevver but feels complete noww
mood today part twwo https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/79a2260e6c4e.jpeg
yeah im considerin it still lettin it gestate in the old hyperbolic mind chamber i wwill be lettin you knoww if i take it
Yes, please keep me upd8ed on your personal growth. One day I might decide to 8e proud of you for a few seconds.
You're notorious for deluding yourself a8out a lot of things. You know I'm the 8est at everything and you just won't admit it.
you could not get me to admit to that falsehood if you had your fingers in my mouth sittin in my lap and pryin my fangs open like the jawws a life
Okay that escal8ed quickly. Is that where your mind has 8een this whole time? >::::)
i wwill neither confirm or deny such sordid things that is for you to knoww mind reader
hold on
wwah wwah wwho wwant me wwho wwants me wwho wwants this wwho wwants that wwell wwho wwants SUCCESS wwho wwants to STAND ABOVVE IT ALL wwith the flames lickin your boots and the edges a your cape staring off into the horizon of a battlefield sorely fought and cruelly earned wwho wwants to reach into the jawws a wwhat is not knowwn and rend free the heart a vvictory bite dowwn into its squelching flesh as the wwarmth trickles dowwn to your gills and claim one more night in the endless tickin a survvivval and time and trollkind wwho wwants to DIE bleedin out in the snoww lookin ovver the hordes a grunts that lay DEAD before you decapitated by your blade and all the forces you amassed carryin your banner and your name stabbin bayonets into the once-wwere-people a the enemy commander as you clutch onto your rifle and DIE WWITH YOUR WWEAPON IN HAND o take me noww my demoness o take me and shadoww me into the cold forevver so i may float amongst the vvaliantly gone and be remembered not for my wwords but for my fuckin kill streak
Okay well it did get me laughing. Pro8a8ly at more parts than you intended 8ut still.
What, your nerdiness and how lame you are? 8ecause that's what I was laughing at.
sure sure try to covver up i see right through your wwebs spider and i knoww wwhat you really laugh at wwhich in a roundabout wway yes is howw nerdy i am but nerdy wwith flair
Please tell me you didn't type that with a str8 face 8ecause I'm trying so hard not to start laughing again.
straight as the shot from my clean shootin rifle you bet your scrawwny grey ass i did
That insult is really rich coming from you. I'm legitim8ly struggling to 8reathe, this is too funny. Go on, tell me more.
wwell i wwould say it takes one to knoww one wwhich means that i happen to be an expert at identifying through vvibes alone if someone has a scrawwny ass but please if i am wwrong feel free to provve it so
I can prove it 8y kicking your scrawny ass. Unless you're too afraid to point your dum8 legendary piece of shit rifle at me. >::::D
@vveritysGleam i wwish i could run you through wwith a galleon https://youtu.be/10z6-vvQm23ww?si=iAfm_MSSJ33yH0rb
࣪⊹₊˚{ what is your PROBLEM with me!!!! you misurfable little RIPTIDE FREAK! }*O*{ }*O*{ }*O*{ }˚₊⊹ ࣪ ࣪⊹₊˚{ when am i going to see you again }._.{ }˚₊⊹ ࣪
maybe it is your face maybe it is your hair maybe EVVERYTHIN ABOUT YOU IS WWHAT IS WWRONG WWITH ME honestly car i mean cari i really am so bored ovver here can i just come ovver tonight and shoot at one a your butlers feet
not sure if i evver evven posted this picture a me pic taken right before i wwalked into my lgs and wwon evvery game wwith the ur-lusus deck #pubstompin https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/6c8db197b2c5.jpeg
because you are not as hard to read and mysterious as you like to pretend you are ee and perhaps your belief in howw i havve no knowwledge at all a the depths a your mysteries and inner machinations is simply not as true as you ascribe it to be you really cannot do things like suddenly type in all caps and say things to hit at my nervves and then act like it is some great big shock that i can tell you are bothered by somethin
y0u really think either 0f th0se things take any eff0rt t0 d0? im n0t b0thered by y0u
࣪⊹₊˚{ you look DESCENT so shut UPPPP about the your-lusus deck already!!!! you look GOOD!!!! }⟡_⟡{ }⟡_⟡{ FINE!!!!!!!! }˚₊⊹ ࣪
you think i look good wwell maybe i wwill just post my entire ur-lusus decklist and talk about it nonstop huh wwhat do you think a that miss big breaches wwith more selfies a course
im ovver here looking like the hornswwaggling fumble chronicles ovver here someone come and take notes on howw shitty things can be done
wwell perhaps i can showw you my collection it is a wwar strategy game i play at my local earth c game store wwhere i fuckin pub stomp noobs wwho roll up wwith their meager armies and fall under the might a mt space elf cannoneers and swwordsmen but like you can focus on the painting part if you wwant i can alwways use more help painting them
:33 < purrainting i wanna puriant!! y3ah id wanna s33 your clawll3ctions if it m3ans i can puraint :3
alright sure wwhen do you wwanna hang out i mean my place is open just as long as that swweaty rag of a blue blood does not come wwith okay i just steam cleaned my furniture
Well for them it usually is exactly that. I've asked a8out it and they won't give me a 8etter answer than "its just like that idk how else to explain it to you". Rolling my eyes so hard. I can't 8elieve you went after her.
:33 < 3quihiss is no wh3r3 n3ar sadly... 3: but i can hang out wh3n3vfur you can i am as fr33 as a m3owb3ast!!
yeah i mean fuck me for thinkin she wwas interested i mean she flirted wwith ME first wwhatevver it isnt like i am that same desperate young man i hang out wwith plenty a people noww i find it so fuckin wweird they havve to cling to their old and wweird systems wwhy cant they just accept there is a better wway to do things also she got offended wwhen i said i wwould buy her chinese takeout do you knoww wwhat that actually means i wwas bee essin it is just takeout food i think
Okay I'll admit 8eing offended 8y Chinese food is a little weird 8ut may8e she took it different. You've still got a pretty severe reput8ion to live down, you know. And if she's got a partner already then she's pro8a8ly just 8ored and messing with you. Humans don't really seem to understand that quadrants aren't the innov8ion of their Earth devil or something.
ugh my reputation seems like no matter wwhat in the flippin fuck i do i cannot get past the errors a my youth wwhatevver i dont need it anywways i am perfectly content wwith my social circle fuck me for trying to meet neww people am i right vvris
Ugh I h8 to say it 8ut you might 8e right. I'm in the same 8oat with 8ad reput8ion. I've found a couple of new people at least. It's enough anyway!
i messed it up shit
wwell firstly i am also on ees side though not for your shalloww superficial personal gain reasons but because she actually came to my aid so i am returning the favvor wwhich means wwe are on the same side second of all havve for once some camaraderie for your blood and see howw i am bein jerked around like a pufferfish by a dolphin
you cant tell me you vwouldnt lovwe being jerked around exactly like that. #suggestivwe
THIS IS NOT THE TIME TO DROP TRUTH NUKES MAN
no, some of you make good friends. i meant you mostly and studmuffin mainly.
@aeneasCaldarium thanks f0r backing me up b0th 0f y0u i genuinely d0nt think i said anything that bad?
probably just angry she got caught wwith her foot in her mouth if pointing out a hypocrisy is bad then guess wwhat may vvillainy reign am i right
this is not pointed at anyone in particular but obvviously the ideal date invvolvves lots a expensivve seafood food convversation a candelabra and the dawwning realization that you wwant to nevvermind this is going to get #nsfww wwhat evver happened to movvies and chill in casual clothing
I'm not opposed to freaking out Jane. I haven't met one yet that I didn't want to 8lock on sight. 8atter8itch o8sessed sore loser would 8e so worried a8out her precious farmland she wouldn't stop to realize 8lowing it up is a stupid idea. Anyway you've always 8een wishing for a rival like that, haven't you? Too 8ad it was impossi8le to kidnap me, huh.
is it so impossible noww wwhere are you located i havve spoken to many serkets on here and i cannot lie some havve evven taken to their owwn indivvidual planets
Mmmm not quite there yet. I've got 8igger fish to fry still. Riding on this stupid rock for god knows how long. ::::I
Oh right you're dead over here. My 8ad! Were you never holed up in a meteor la8 hiding from Jack?? We are kind of on a really important mission right now. It's just taking forever.
in my timeline wwe reached a sort of end so i am livvin a stationary life on earth after vvictory although vvictory starts to feel a little less important day by day i am currently residing on wwhat you wwould call a post game mixed populace existence are you seriously tellin me you are stuck on the meteor wwith the rest a us hidin from jack noir still are you like stuck in time or somethin
What? No! After every8ody finished killing each other we took the meteor to the green sun and now it's flying through the Incisisphere towards the humans' other session. I'm just w8ing here for now until it's time for me to leave them. What kind of end? Just hanging around in the human victory?
oh so are you tellin me that you havvent evven met the alphas those humans that hang wwith jane i guess i am just shocked your timeline is still activvely dealing wwirh it all yeah end is pretty borin turns out there wwas a large scale vvictory wwith some ghost army then earth wwas made the humans wwent about revvivving evverybody and wwell vvoila here i am revvivved and stuck on a neww age planet a soft wwilled trolls wwho nevver greww up on alternia
Hey I can't control how fast time moves! Trust me, we would 8e done with this 8y now if I had my way. I've heard of the ghost army happening, I'm just not there yet! 8ut if that's what the real endgame is afterward may8e I shouldn't 8e in such a rush after all.
obvviously if there is to be a livve action reenactment of lord of the rings i wwill be playing sauron the lidless eye is my pleasure to portray wwith the wwhite hot fires a SCIENCE
i reject your foul and incapable castin abilities wwitch renounce your list and i could be persuaded to make you a graceful and gorgeous elf in my superior castings
I'm already Haldir in this one. And, for the record, this isn't /my/ casting. I just put the information together as people picked their roles.
wwell i think perhaps you should pick people wwho are wworthy a such performances also you do kinda look like haldir so i wwill keep that
howw dare you a course i wwould nevver play one a those simple hairy foot bastards i wwould only settle for one a the great casters sauron saruman the wwitch king a angmar or gandalf
wwell feet not legs hairy legs are fine manly evven hairy face is ideal but smooth shavved can be nice as wwell preferable evven it is as the old antiquities say a sign a being civvilized transcendent and knowwledgeable like my smooth shavven face handsome too i dont knoww if you havve noticed
wwell then you are in luck i havve no long beard at all just a smooth face for that cleavvage
