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Wheatley

@smartestSphere

I am NOT a MORON!

Blood: IndigoKult Score: 113Kull Score: 1557 followers0 following

Hey, uh, has anyone seen any confidential Aperture Science files? It seems that they're, uh. Missing. From the archives. If anyone could tell me what happened to them then... uh... please do, okay?

Kult: +20
Kull: +20
Total: 40
Ratio: 1.00

[Script start:Y⁰u ₩⁰uld be the ⁰ne t⁰ l⁰se them....:script terminated]

Woah woah woah. Are you throwing SHADE? At ME? The smartest person in THIS facility? You gotta be yankin' my bloody chain here!

[Script start:Y⁰u āre infāct the brightest m⁰r⁰n ive even hād the Displeāsure ⁰f ₩ātching bl⁰ss⁰m int⁰ ā un₩ieldy e×istence. I see ₩hy GLāD0S l⁰ves y⁰u ...s⁰⁰⁰ much...:script terminated]

I'm not even gonna say it. It's too easy.

Kult: +2
Total: 2

It's settled then, I'm going to be a Wheatley Crab!

I mean, if I had hands (Which I don't have, just to be clear), I would proooobably attend Fight Night. Keyword here is probably. Yeah, that's the keyword.

Kult: +30
Kull: +30
Total: 60
Ratio: 1.00

Doesn't the eyelid-thing on your glowy screen open and close? if you do that hard enough it's kindof like biting. You can bite people at fight night.

Do it anyway, coward.

Ohhh, bloody brilliant idea! I can, uh, "bite" people! I like where you're going with this.

Kult: +5
Total: 5

you might be able to convince one of the mechanics on the site to take the legs off one of the turrets and put them on you, too. then you can bite AND kick.

They could make me into a Wheatley Crab!

Kult: +5
Total: 5

THEY COULD MAKE YOU INTO A WHEATLEY CRAB!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why is there a version of me with a red eye.

Kult: +15
Kull: +20
Total: 35
Ratio: 0.75

YOU GOTTA HELP ME BRO I'M GOING TO DIE

NO!

Let him die. Free entertainment.

Kult: +5
Total: 5

What even are you?

Kult: +20
Kull: +20
Total: 40
Ratio: 1.00

Oh god, not you.

A leprechaun? What are you?

I'm Wheatley!

Code hallucinating itself to be the Ghost of someone. That seems to be a little common on this site!

Say, how IS everyone else here? I was up in space a while ago before this, wasn't I?

Hello!

Kult: +30
Kull: +30
Total: 60
Ratio: 1.00

Hey, I remember you! Didn't that robot lady clone you and shove you into one of my sappers? https://wiki.teamfortress.com/wiki/Ap-Sap

@mannCo[MC]

She did that? I mean, not surprising considering what she's done to me but still.

Yeah, she did.

What are your opinions on the Smurfs.

Just why are there so many of those little blue freaks? Why have so many of them?

EXACTLY. Exactly. There's far too many.

Oh, bloody hell. Don't tell me that SHE is on this site too.

Kult: +12
Kull: +10
Total: 22
Ratio: 1.20

im sorry to break it to you but she indeed is

Kult: +5
Total: 5

I'm fucking livid.

Kult: +7
Total: 7