WHEEL OF TORTURE
@tortureWheel
[WINNER, WINNER, WINNER] <[Play games, enter to win CASH and PRIZES, apply to be a CONTESTANT and get to know our beloved host RGABIE ADAMAN!] <[Every SATURDAY at 8 PM on Alternia Central!]
[FORCED TO PLAY OVERWATCH] <[PRE-GAME INTERVIEW 3:] Costar Treign @surlyTabloid <[Costar comes from us from the bustle of his own office. Dissatisfied with his job writing for the NEWS, he decided to take the wheel and start his OWN journey, getting in WILD SITUATIONS on the way! Don’t be misguided by his alleged repertoire of writing skills — he is a CHUD (Cjobless Hhivedwelling Uinternet Dentrepreneur). Keep an eye on him. He’ll rule the game with an iron fist! LITERALLY! Hopefully!] <[Here we asked him a SERIES OF QUESTIONS to get to know him better as a PERSON AND A COMPETITOR.] <[Let’s see what he has to say!] ________________________________ [Tell me about your background. What's your life story?] ST: OH, I’M JUST A NEWS GUY, Y’KNOW? I USED TO WORK FOR BIG EMPIRE NEWS DIRECTORS, BUT WE GOT INTO SOME ARGUMENTS SO I MADE MY OWN COMPANY, LLT, WHERE I “WORK” NOW. WE “WORK” SOMETIMES, I GUESS. MAINLY WATCH GRUBTUBE AND SOMEHOW GET INTO ANTICS NOW AND THEN? THAT’S ALL THAT’S NOTEWORTHY. TA: What kind of Antics, if you don't mind me asking? ST: THE ANNOYING KIND, LIKE OLD COWORKERS LOOKING FOR ME. THE BAD, UNSPEAKABLE KIND, LIKE DROPPING FOOD ON THE FLOOR. JUST THE OTHER WIPE I WAS IN A STORM THAT TOOK OUT AN ISOLATED SUBGRUB. WAS STUCK IN A CAVE FOR A WHILE. [If you could choose to travel to ANY PART OF THE WORLD, where would it be and why?] ST: YEESH, THAT’S TOUGH. ‘CUPE? FIRST THING THAT COMES TO MIND. THERE’S NOT MUCH OUTSIDE THE OFFICE I NEED TO DO. [How certain are you that you'll survive the game? Why?] ST: I’M NOT CERTAIN OF MUCH, BUT I’VE SURVIVED A LOT OF STUFF THAT SOMEHOW HAPPENS ALL THE TIME. I’M CONFIDENT. [So a bit MORE about the show: you'll be faced with a multitude of challenges testing your STRENGTH, WIT, AND CREATIVITY. Maybe a mishmash of all three! You've got to keep your bulbs peeled and your mettle ready to be Tested. Regarding this, do you have a game strategy in mind? Not only WITH these challenges, but with your fellow competitors? Are you planning to PLAY SOLO or TEAM UP?] ST: MAN, I DON’T REALLY KNOW ANY OF THOSE GUYS. NO INITIATIVE TO REACH OUT A HELPING HAND, UNLESS IT HELPS ME OUT, Y’KNOW? I DON’T WORK WELL WITH MOST PEOPLE. AS FOR THE CHALLENGES, JUST TRUST ME, MAN. [Do you think you'd make more friends or more enemies in the game?] ST: I’M NOTORIOUS FOR SOMEHOW MAKING LOTS OF BOTH. I’M NOT ACTUALLY, BUT IT’S HARD TO SAY. I’M A FRIENDLY GUY, BUT GIVEN THE COMPETITIVE ENVIRONMENT I’D PROBABLY MAKE MORE ENEMIES. [What would you do with the million caegars if you WON?] ST: THREE WORDS. SUPER GOONING HIVE. [Finally, do you have anything to say to the people you'll be COMPETING AGAINST?] ST: LET ME WIN AND YOU CAN GET A ROOM IN THE SUPER GOONING HIVE. [I'm playing a game of Mini Tele☎, so you get to see THIS message from the LAST PERSON I INTERVIEWED:] RI: print("please do not kill me") RI: print("+ i think everyone should pick a gog + start praying") ST: WOWIE. ST: SOMEONE’S [GOT] A LITTLE STAGE FRIGHT. ________________________________ <[WHAT. A. CHARACTER. This is a troll you JUST CAN’T MISS! See what antics HE’LL get into on the WHEEL OF TORTURE! And be on the lookout for our NEXT INTERVIEW! Hope you had fun interviewing this guy, @televisedAviamor!] <[#wheeloftorture #spinthewheel #wotinterviews]
would telling you he'S hiveless right now make you more or less endeared to him do you think
I mean/ He can have my old Hive if he's anywhere near the Ashgluts/ I'm neutrally endeared/
It *is* full of traps, though/ So/
S↑er. Gooning. Hive.
Him. Continue eating your wheel of torture brand kibble. You have not wronged me.
[BULLETS IN HOTDOG] <[DON'T expose the kibble just yet! It's a secret product!!!]
what 1f 1 re-d1d my own wheel of torture 1nterv1ew huh? rgab1e probably deleted the or1g1nal tape LOL, petty as hell
LOL no, 1 was just mak1ng sh1t up to bother you
checkmate B)
anyth1ng can be an argument 1f you try
youre l1terally do1ng 1t r1ght now champ
sure 1t 1s
𝆏 - - my ~employee complaining about me~ senses are tinglingggg
[BREAKING WHEEL] <[Implying NO ONE HAS SAID ANYTHING ABOUT YOU!]
[WINNER, WINNER, WINNER] <[I would NEVER speak ill of my BOSS, you know!]
I EXPECT YOU ALL TO CHEER MY NAME LIKE A GRUBSCHOOL SPORTS DAY. #WHEELOFTORTURE #WELOVERGABIE
[STONING] <[You remembered MY OWN TAG!!!! Ohhh, Mr. Treign!]
[FEED COMMENTARY] Oh, can't wait for the contestant I've been banking on to finally make an appearance.
[BREAKING WHEEL] <[PRE-GAME INTERVIEW 2:] Riiane Connol @ramblingIndividual <[Riiane is a jadeblood coming to us from a rather unfortunate situation. He’s trying to survive in a world that frowns upon hobbyists wanting to make a living off what they LOVE. He’s in search of many things: a JOB, FOOD ON HIS PLATE, ENDLESS RICHES, and… LOVE(S)?! Okay, KIDDING on that last part. His SKILLS, however, are no joke. He’s a MASTER (amateur) BASS PLAYER——but he didn’t come here to PLAY; he came to WIN!] <[Here we asked him a SERIES OF QUESTIONS to get to know him better as a PERSON AND A COMPETITOR.] <[Let’s see what he has to say!] ________________________________ [Tell me about your Background. What's your Life Story?] RI: print("ummm well i am broke + need money so that is why i joined") RI: print("i kinda saw the money part + skimmed the rest i did not realise i was probably going to die") RI: print("i play bass but i doubt that will be useful here") [If there's anywhere you would want to go in the world, where would it be and why? This could be anywhere on Alternia OR on Beforus. OR a Fictional Place.] RI:print("uhhh hot chick heaven i dont know man") RI:print("due to the whole being broke thing i have not really thought about going anywhere") [How certain are you that you'll survive the WHEEL OF TORTURE?] RI:print("i guess") print("i am afraid") RI:print("with hindsight the names + t+c are quite foreboding") RI:print("but like surely not everyone is going to die right?") [So a bit MORE about the show: you'll be faced with a Multitude of challenges testing your STRENGTH, WIT, AND CREATIVITY. Maybe a mishmash of all three (⒊)! Regarding this, do you have a game strategy in mind? Not only WITH these challenges, but with your fellow competitors? Are you planning to PLAY SOLO or TEAM ↑?] RI:print("well i do not really know anyone else competing") print("which means they will probably 🦆 me over") RI:print("so perhaps if i just stick to myself + troop on i wont be putting a target on my back") RI:print("i hope") [On that note, do you think you'd ultimately make more friends or more enemies in the game?] RI:print("well i would like to hope friends") print("but seeing the nature of the game i would not really want to see all my new found friends die") RI:print("+ i do not see any reason why i would amass any enemies") RI:print("so i suppose i am leaning closer to the friends side") [What would you do with the Million Caegars if you WON?] RI:print("well i would probably buy an actual hive inside of the dilapidated ruin im in at the moment") RI:print("buy a lot of food") RI:print("probably buy a lot of drink") RI:print("not just for the enjoyment side i will probably want to forget some stuff....") RI:print("+ then give some of it to some friends") [Do you have anything to say to the people you'll be competing against?] RI:print("please do not kill me") print("+ i think everyone should pick a gog + start praying") [I'm playing a game of Mini Tele☎, so you get to see THIS message from the LAST PERSON I INTERVIEWED.] CA: uhnmmmm ^_^ apple ^_^ oh and good luck and ha\/e a good day ^_^ and uhhhhhh ^_^ uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh lalalalalalalalalalala ^_^ RI:print("that has eliminated some of the stress") RI:print("it is a lovely message") [How would you respond to this, hypothetically?] RI:print("umm thank you for the well wishes of good luck") RI:print("with any of it we will both survive!") ________________________________ <[Isn’t he so CHARMINGLY RELATABLE? The WHEEL OF TORTURE seemed to be the QUICKEST WAY for a PAYDAY. But will he survive? You’ll have to find out on the WHEEL OF TORTURE! Stick around to see the NEXT INTRODUCTION to our COLORFUL CAST! Once again, thanks for interviewing our dear contestants, @televisedAviamor!] <[#wheeloftorture #spinthewheel #wotinterviews]
IF I WERE A VIEWER I MIGHT JUST ROOT FOR HIM.
[THE MARROW FURNACE] <[Do you think he's going to say the same ABOUT YOUR INTERVIEW? (CROWD WHISPERING)]
C’MON, MAN. NO PARTICIPANT IS ROOTING FOR ME.
NOW THAT YOU MENTION IT, 1,000,000 CAEGARS ON FOOD AND DRINK IS PRETTY SELF SERVING. MAYBE I DON’T ROOT FOR THIS GUY.
[HANGING] <[Considering you just LOST YOUR JOB, you MIGHT need these 1,000,000 CAEGARS more, MR. TREIGN.]
OH, YEAH. GUYS HE’S NOT THE ONLY HIVELESS PLAYER.
[FORCED TO PLAY OVERWATCH] <[I must say I am very PROUD of you not putting your LIFE on the line there! We kind of legally own it now, after all!]
WHEN I WIN DO YOU STOP OWNING IT?