
I KNOW. IT'S LAST-MINUTE. FUCK OFF IF YOU'RE MAD ABOUT IT. I'VE HAD A HELL OF A WIPE. ATTENTION, WORTHLESS CINEMANIACS. THIS IS KARKAT VANTAS, LEADER OF THE ADORABLOODTHIRSTY CINEMASSACRE CLUB, HERE TO ANNOUNCE THAT THIS WIPE'S #ABCC #WATCHPARTY WILL BE (BY LOUD AS FUCK POPULAR DEMAND): PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: DEAD MAN'S CHEST (2006). I KNOW WHAT SOME OF YOU ARE THINKING. "IS ABCC JUST GOING TO BE ALL PIRATES, NOW. HAVE YOU FULLY SOLD OUT, KARKAT. IS TROLL BOB IGER BEHIND A CURTAIN SOMEWHERE, SLIPPING YOU A BOONBUCK TO JUST PLAY EVERY SINGLE MOVIE FROM THIS FUCKASS FRANCHISE." MY ANSWER IS THE SAME ONE I ALWAYS GIVE. HOW DARE YOU SPEAK TO ME. AND ALSO, NO. DESPITE THE CHEERS OF THE THRONGING CROWD FOR "PIRATES, MORE BLOODY PIRATES," THIS MOVIE STANDS OUT IN PARTICULAR. REMEMBER HOW I SAID THAT THE CURSE OF THE BLACK PEARL WAS A ROMANCE? WELL HOLD THE FUCKING PALMHUSK, PEOPLE. YOU WANT TO TALK ROMANCE? THERE'S NO ROMANCE LIKE A *TRAGIC* ROMANCE. AND LET ME TELL YOU. THIS IS A MOVIE THAT SPEAKS TO THE VERY DEPTHS OF MY BRINY, PICKLED, BARNACLE-ENCRUSTED BLACK PUSHER IN A WAY THAT ONLY THE MOST HATEFUL YEARNERS ALIVE COULD UNDERSTAND. IT HAS LONGING. IT HAS SORROW. AND YES. IT HAS THE LEGENDARY FUCKING DICE SCENE. IT'S TIME TO TWIST THAT KEY, CRACK OPEN THE CHEST. AND #GETIN. THIS MOVIE IS RATED PG-13 (PUNGENT GRUBSAUCE WITH ENOUGH SPICE TO KILL A 13 PERIGEE-OLD). SHOWTIMES ARE AT 7 PM PST (PLACIDIC STANDARD TIME) EVERY WEDNESDAY AND FRIDAY AT [ https://hyperbeam.com/v/abcc ]. REMEMBER THAT FRIDAYS ARE OPTIONAL SUBSTANCE NIGHTS. GMT (GHASTLY MIST TIME) SHOWTIMES ARE HOSTED BY CO-LEADER AND CINEMA BALL-KNOWER @creaticGoeticist, SO FOLLOW HIM FOR THE GMT SHOWTIME. RSVP BELOW WITH WHAT DAY YOU WANT TO RESERVE A SEAT FOR. GRAB THEM NOW, WHILE YOU CAN. THESE THINGS FILL UP FAST. REMEMBER: ABCC HAS A SUGGESTION BOX. IF YOU HAVE A MOVIE THAT *YOU* WANT TO WATCH THAT DOESN'T SUCK MAJOR SHAME GLOBES AND CAN BE EVEN *TECHNICALLY* CONSTRUED AS A ROMANCE IN LITERALLY ANY WAY, IN ANY CONCEIVABLE QUADRANT, THEN SUBMIT IT HERE [ https://forms.gle/7anjoq22cFsipBMS8 ]. SEE YOU THERE, ASSHOLES. #GETIN.







