♥ liked by @timaeusTestified
ill gtfo on account of being #notgay but if you cant read, thats on you
this. this can’t 8e the first thing i see after my dream.
check out bulgecurators revwiewv and get fucked
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When a real bad bitch gets meta the whole site quivers.
Oh hey girl. Good work.
You are all welcome, by the way.
Any advice on how to evict a strider would be lovely. Invited dirk over to hang out but apparently he took it as "come all the way to my house and go to sleep on my bed." Ive been camping out on my floor for the better part of twenty minutes now because hes decided to take my bed hostage! Why even come over at this point? (#suggestive perhaps for certain visible markings. I dont know whats necessary!) https://i.postimg.cc/mgtBHjTH/so-lazy.png
Well im stuck in my bed at the moment or i probably wouldve been occupied a while ago. Haha.
Might need to try doing that literally at this rate. :(
Its nightmarish honestly. Im so terribly bored its really kind of amazing. Didnt know i could even get this friggin bored.
dAmN MoThErFuCkEr dIdN'T KnOw yOu gOt dOwN To cLoWn lIkE ThAt. ShIt, I'M ReAlLy nOt uSeD To fOlKs bEiNg tHiS FoRwArD WiTh wItH A MoThErFuCkEr. wAiT AiN'T YoU ThE MoThErFuCkIn dIrK ThAt wAnTeD To sLuRp mE DoWn tO CoMpArE WiTh jAkE?
i cAn't lIkE FoRcE ThE YeArNiNg, WoN'T Be gEnUiNe lIkE ThAt mAn. GoTtA Be lIkE StRuCk wItH InSpIrAtIoN. dOn't eVeN KnOw yOu lIkE ThAt. MoSt oF ThE MoThErFuCkIn dIrK'S I TaLkEd tO KiLl tHe vIbE.
Alone.
Dirks a lot more touchy than i ever really anticipated. I mean it isnt an issue or whatever but the dude sure does love holding onto me like some sorta stuffed animal whenever were laying down together and im so friggin hot right now i think i might faint. I feel too bad to tell him to get off me though. I wont get a wink of sleep like this.
i dOn't eItHeR BrO, bUmS Me oUt sO I GoTtA YeArN LoUdEr i gUeSs. HoNk hOnK HoNk, DiDn't sOuNd lIkE OnE TiLl yOuS WeNt aNd sAiD ThAt mAn. nOt tO SoUnD LiKe a bUlGe cYsT Or nOtHiN BuT YoU ArE A DiRk, Ya'lL AiN'T ReAlLy kNoWn fOr bEiNg mOtHeRuFcKiN EmOtIoNaLlY AvAiLaBlE Or nOtHiN. cAn mAkE A HoRnY PoSt fOr yOu mAn (O:
huh. sounds pretty shitty.
dUnNo wHaT To tElL YoU MaN, cHiTtR BeInG FrEe aNd aLl. WhY JeAlOuS BrO?
he still calls me mr strider even though were dating. #watdatmean
rEaLlY FeEl lIkE MaCkInG On a dAvE, tOnGuE DoWn hIs tHrOaT TiCkLiNg hIs bElLy tYpE ShIt. #NsFw #YeArNiNg
he’s so cute. i just wanna bite the shit out of him. #suggestive #nsfw #vaguepost
Have you ever seen two lesbians make fun of HIV directly in front of you, and the second you call them out for being weird in the server when they could have just taken it to DMs, you get called sensitive? "I want HIV, wife." "Give me HIV." Did this only happen to me?
thats exactly the type of shit that has that rockstar flare bro
on the street and i got my swag on (ocray) get the money, gotta get my bag on (ocray) triple backflip out the whole scene (ocray) all you suckers just wanna be me so uh, get smacked, you're lookin wack i got the big stacks, im pushin stacks new outfit, you wish you had it on omnitrix on the wrist, gotta keep it on (ocray) #lyricposting
Maow~
Mmm... Of course. <3
I felt a little adventurous and took a picture of myself in my new body~
Something worthwhile, like-- would you like me to call you slurs while whipping you? \></ #nsfw
0h fine even though its the l0ngest wednesday there can still be a bit of #widewednesday inside. its like a tesseract but easier tw0 seduce. #nsfw ((fornicata!!))
>> Honeડt1y. Y'know what. Fa¡r enough.
hi guys! gott 2 do dis again man i luv women
do dogs get slurs? :/
what da fuck this weird asf i dig it
iif ii 2ee her puttiing her hand2 down that guy2 pant2 iim gonna blow up her fuckiing phone.
@ImJunI(o)r ThIS IS h(o)W I f33l ab(o)uT JunI(o)r.
(o)h Th3y WISh. BUT h3y, y(o)u maD3 m3 chuckl3!
IT chang3S D3p3nDIng (o)n my m(o)(o)D anD h(o)W much S(o)m3(o)n3 mak3S my Slug ShrIv3l
I n33D T(o) ST(o)p b3frI3nDIng m(o)Th3rfuck3rS ThaT Dr3SS lIk3 Th3y'v3 n3v3r T(o)uch3D a n(o)(o)k b3f(o)r3.
"Wh(o) WanT m3?" I can'T r3ply T(o) Th(o)S3 (cauS3 I D(o)n'T WanT y(o)u), buT alS(o) cauS3 I ThInk I'D Scar3 m(o)ST (o)f y(o)u In p3rS(o)n. anD I can'T p(o)ST "Wh(o) WanT m3" cauS3 I'll W33vIlS all (o)v3r my p(o)ST.
Older Xef getting teased in the showers after a game #nsfw https://file.garden/af1MSJbRqgHS7ama/IMG_0288.jpeg
ThankS! HIlarI(o)uSly (o)mIn(o)uS.
f(o)r Th3 purpl3S ThaT T3ll rIDDl3S anD lIk3 T(o) prank. fuck y(o)u. "AnSW3r my rIDDl3 T(o) g3T In y(o)ur hIv3." I'm g(o)Ing T(o) br3ak D(o)Wn my D(o)(o)r.
Sh(o)uT (o)uT T(o) Th3 Tr(o)llS, v3ry publIcly D3Sp3raT3 anD h(o)rny. n3v3r chang3 3v3n If y(o)u g3T S(o)m3.
An(o)nym(o)uS3 ASk3D: IS Th3 unD3rTak3r r3ally y(o)ur br(o)Th3r? Wh(o)? AnD N(o)? Tr(o)llS can'T hav3 SIblIngS. (uSually)
@p3rSpIcacI(o)uSPlann3r aSk3D: Why r u Such a ragIng aSSh/)l3? :o)
ALL OF THIS IS SO ENTERTAINING HEE HEE HOO HOO!!! YES YES PLEASE TELL THE MASSES OF YOUR PATHETIC AWFUL LIVES!!!
HAA HAA HEE HEE HOO HOO!!!
I just got sent this. I'm unsure how to feel. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/70b2978285f0.png
https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/c68045945d94.png
I GOT MYSELF BOY DONT EVEN WORRYYYYYY BOUT ME
RAGEBAIT IS SO EASY WHEN YOUR AUDIENCE IS RIGHT! HAHA HEHEHE
1. me and dirk aren't g0ing two v0lunteer conversati0n. maybe i'll get a recipe off cr0cker but i don't see us getting chatty either. n0where on the plane is safe from the generalized yapfest but that's the m0st insulated spot.
:33< meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow
four, no contest.
∙☾__☽ to everryone with a chest and ass that bounces when they walk stay mitherral and blessed
i need her t0 kiss me, say h0w much she l0ves me and then tear 0pen my chestplate rip my wires tear away at my steel all while she pins my s d0wn praising me treating me like i'm beneath her as i sl0wly and meth0dically break her b0nes melting int0 her as we passi0nately kiss taking it the distance as bl00dy br0ken and fucked up as we are. #g0re #vi0lence #nsfw
WhIppIng (o)uT my Slug
do you genuinely find other cronii better to hang around than me?
some chud asked "do you actually knowv hovw to drivwe a car or are you a poser?" uhh yeah i ovwn a couple cars, all human make of course, fewv conwvertibles, some muscle cars, an exact replica of greased lightning, and i drivwe em around vwhen i cruise for babes
oh yeah, she wvants me. vwoof.
I may be bitchless but at least im really ann0ying ab0ut it
I'VE STARTED USING MY OWN METRIC IN A LIMP-FRONDED ATTEMPT TO TRACK *SOME* SEMBLANCE OF THE PASSAGE OF TIME *WITHOUT* REFERRING TO ANY OF THE EVIL FUCKING CLOCKS FESTOONING THIS HELLHOLE. IT'S AN INCREMENT OF MY OWN INVENTION. THEY'RE CALLED KARKAT HOURS. ONE KARKAT HOUR = ANY AMOUNT OF TIME SPENT DOING SOME BULLSHIT THAT FEELS LIKE IT IS *ACTIVELY* AGING ME AND ROBBING ME OF MY WANING LIFE FORCE. SO BASICALLY, ANY SHIT THAT MAKES ME OLD. LIKE THIS JOB. THIS JOB IS MAKING ME OLD. WE ARE FORTY-THREE KARKAT HOURS IN. I'VE SWEPT UP THE FLOOR. AS IN I'VE SWEPT THE ENTIRE FLOOR *OUT* OF THIS ABLUTION BLOCK, BECAUSE I'M PRETTY SURE SHE PUT ON THE BIGGEST BOOTS HER STUMPY LITTLE LEGS COULD FIT INTO AND STOMPED THE TILE INTO FUCKING GRAVEL. I'M GOING TO HAVE TO REDO THIS WHOLE FUCKING THING. FUCK YOU. FUCK YOU TO DEATH. WRITING THIS CHITT TOOK AN ENTIRE KARKAT HOUR IN OF ITSELF. WILL UPDATE AS NEEDED.
orange is pretty awesome i think!
i also love being green
yeah, youre gonna pull out the thesaurus and distribute some free literature for me? wvhats your preferred terminology for vwhat you do vwhen you see the center-fold in your dictionary? you bash one out? beat it? beat off? crank one out? fap? goon? jack off? jerk off? jerk the gherkin? knock one out? make the bald man cry? masturbate? play some pocket pool? play vwith yourself? pleasure yourself? rub one out? self-pollute? servwice yourself? skeet it? stroke it? toss it? toss off? touch yourself? havwe a wvank? vwhack off? yank your chain? or maybe you prefer the more colorful ones? you bashing the bishop? beating your meat? choking the chicken? cuffing the carrot? flogging the dolphin? pulling your pud? slapping some salami? spanking the monkey? wvhittling the wvhalebone? shit dude, cum at me wvith some better material here. youre acting like "wvovw you knovw vwhat morals are?" is some killer ovwn, then youre coming out wvith some 5 caegar wvords from your vwocab of the night calendar. probably hawve to use that to learn any nevw trisyllabics seeing hovw your dictionarys all crusted ovwer from the sheer amount of spunk, jizz, cum, semen, spooge, genmat, sperm, fluids, cockmilk, all that, just hovw much youwve coated that thing wvith ovwer the swveeps. i mean damn, articulation, thats fiwve vwhole syllables. im surprised you got through it wvithout creaming all ovwer your screen. you coulda at least givwen me the sesquipedalian treatment, maybe hit me wvith antidisestablishmentarianismantidisestablishmentarianism. kind of a cliche, but its a classic for a reason. maybe you coulda done some research, i just learned about lopadotemachoselachogaleokranioleipsanodrimhypotrimmatosilphiokarabomelitokatakechymenokichlepikossyphophattoperisteralektryonoptokephalliokigklopeleiolagoiosiraiobaphetraganopterygon.try evwen starting to figure out that one. look kid, im not mad, im just disappointed. be funnier. and if you hit me vwith a "lol u mad" or "too long didnt read" or some bullshit creatiwvely bankrupt non-response, you owve me twventy bucks.
:33< agr33!
gasp!!!!! barking about this one!!!
#mydaeve is green, meanwhile you have a knife for a head
Diamonds Droog.
1'M DY1NG OF H34T................................ OUGGGHGHGHGHHGHGH!!!
Hark. I can hear upon the wind... A woof, in quad.
wait, beep? specifically?
nah. my jugs do beep when you squeeze Them Though. #suggesTive
Clown inspired by Twisted Metal Black Kaine Touthe Background: In his timeline he's a big fan of GHB and a happy lil member of the clown church. Height: 10ft tall. ooc: @kingGreed https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/c752f36348b5.png https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/3f7248b76db1.png
what is wron6 with you...........
I need me a guy with creepy unsettling rizz
Well obviously. But you forget that God thinks I'm endearing.
The concept of #sinday is confusing to me. You are all clearly already committing constant sins all the time forever, and even if you spent the next 12 years of your life repenting, the pearly gates would still not welcome you.
i look at you and begin chargin a particle annihilation beam consistin a my hope my lovve and all of my fury otherwwise knowwn as AHABS ABSOLUTION <3 to attempt seduction <> to try talkin me dowwn from my wwrath <3< to accept my challenge and beam clash for survvivval c3< if you think you got some other bs counter to bein smited by my holy vvengeance but detail these feats in a reply
We sorted it now but it was a bunch of silly nonsense and also a bit of a long story hahah. I posted a thread requesting someone to tussle with because i havent had time to wrestle proper with anything other than that blasted robot in *ages* and its been driving me mad. Dave offered himself up but to be honest the fellas a little scrawny and urm. Well i just felt itd be unfair and i told him that because i was worried i might snap the dude in half. But he took it all personally and stuff. Were all good now though ive apologized and he vented his frustrations and whatnot. Phew.
#nsfw open chittr see cock n dick ya tht makes sense
tHaNkS MaN! (O: HoNk!
tHiNkIn bOuT PoStInG HoLe, NoT SuRe wHaT ThE HoLe pOsTiNg hOuRs aRe )O: #nSfW
some of you are so unemployed you can't even get a #blowjob. #nsfw. now hiring btw.
https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/7ecec7a120c0.png *blowws you up wwith my mind*
Oh my. Very flattering. Well i hope thinking about me provides you with proper entertainment then. :)
Happy to help dude. If youre ever bored im usually around! Except for when im not. Hahahah.
Oh no. #vaguemeowing
My guilty pleasure is analysis videos of Big Brother players. It’s just facinating.
Good morning chittr people!
#nsfw #frotting @goliathsTerror [A picture, close enough to see the reflecting shine of piercings in Dirk's dick, with their bodies pressed together almost enough to hide them completely. Dirk's nails are painted, but chipped, as he holds them together.]
PINNED CHIT - 26 years old | he/him | cisgender and somewhere queer wise - roommates with Roro, Jake, and Jane. Hal is also alive and separate from ARquius. - situationship type relationship with Roro and Jane, officially with Jake. - Autistic, Borderline Personality Disorder, probably some other shit too. - does robot commissions, struggles with fixations and needs to be dragged away at times - involved with au including @goliathsTerror and @tipsyGalactica - can be #nsfw and #mentalhealth related at times. Discusses past accidental #emotionalabuse
Harsh but i hear you loud and clear! I will be getting exceptionally cozy. :)
Right well i think im going to take a half hour to try and get even a wink of sleep and pick up where i left off. Surely a half hour wont hurt.
Right you are! Im taking it as easy as i can bro dont worry about me. :)
Well no but i did certainly make an attempt! The past few days have been so darn eventful its nigh on impossible for a guy like me to get a wink of sleep anymore. I did get some more time to lay down and do nothing though. Suppose i cant complain too much hahah.
Well... No? But i appreciate your attempt.
Don't worry I was merely pulling your shapely leg. My chumhandle used to be "tentacleTherapist," a pun almost as transparent as the supposed irony with which I selected it! We are of one mind on this one Curree. The Horrorterrors can fucking get it.
Eheheheheh.
Gasp. You want to... FUCK a giant tentacle monster? How disgusting, how perverted! You truly are a unique case. Nobody has ever thought that before mrrow. :3
he's my friend
i cant throw it back without throwing out my back :(
im so rich and awesome :)
:33< while mew know im a huge fan of women :33< as a pansexmewal i must agr33 with this! :33< men! #nsfw!
men #nsfw
Mm. I suppose you have a point!
Is that so dirk?
If theres one thing im an absolute slut for, its a reeeeeeally good back massage. Not really #nsfw but just in case. :)
Reading Troll Kurt Vonnegut Just To Feel Something ( Visceral Discomfort With The Self ).
Whoever Sa|d That Can Come Face Me |n A Duel And See For Themselves That My Sk|lls And My Deck Are Beyond Compar|son. |f You're S|mply Just Mak|ng Reference To My Favor|te Eastern Beforan Scrolls As Seen |n My Prof|le P|cture, Then | W|ll Begrudg|ngly G|ve Kudos.
| Have Been Asked Why | Bothered To Get A L|cense To R|de A Motor|zed Two Wheel Dev|ce When | Typ|cally Get Around V|a Lusus Or Lusus Themed A|rcraft. The Answer Should Be Obv|ous. There |s Few Greater Thr|lls Than A Game Of F|duspawn On Motorcycles.
This cat's always lookin' like I owe him money when I'm just tryin' to eat my breakfast. You merely adopted bein' a freeloader, puss. I was BORN IN IT. Better get used to me bein' here.
My back is killing me this morning!
hhhnhhhnhhhngn setting uhhp an accouhhnt on chhhnittr, knowing youhh’re going to get hhhnate-reacted and attacked for youhhr posts... little do thhhney know, youhh touhhchhhn youhhrself to every react youhh get... every hhhnate-filled interaction, every nasty comment only makes youhhr nook wetter and makes youhhr buhhlge twitchhhn #nsfw
once had a lil rust ask MMe to sit on their face n first of all no thanks i don’t really enjoy bein on the receivin end of any of that sorta thing but second of all i think they woulda died i think i actually woulda crushed their nugbone like a seedless grape n i’MM not about that life #nsfw #nsfc
dead by daylight skins
what the fuck is that
thiZ iZ too good to Keep in my replieZ. witneZZ him httpZ://imageZ.Zquidge.org/imageZ/2026/05/24/Untitled478_20260524065540.png
It's okay. Just know the three important facts Stab Bark And jades a dork
Maybe I want to spend some of my sub-nanoseconds on other things. Besides, it's funnier to watch an incident in slow motion.
the internet is next week's last week's newspaper, if 7ou think about it
youll find that it helps to not question things when it comes to jack? trust me
It's a running tragedy, yes. But I look forward to seeing every microsecond of it, at least.
Five minutes. :)
Oh good, because its about to intensify ten-fold if you take me up on my offer.
Is that so?
kudos!
Date idea: i give you a five minute head start and chase you all night long. :) https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/0fb127444517.jpg
oohh mgmggd oddd
tHiS GoNnA Be a mUtUaL ThInG? oR Am i jUsT GeTtInG FuCkInG LiCkEd cHuTe tO ClIt fOr yEr rAtInGs? #nSfW
wElL WhIcH Is iT MoThErFuCkEr? aIn't hAd nOt cOmPlAiNtS YeT.
dAmN AlRiGhT, i gOt hAlF An hOuR To kIlL If yOu dOwN To fUcKiNg cLoWn.
lIkE Do i gOtTa fUcKiNg tAsTe bOtH Of yOu aNd pIcK ... Or? #NsFw
₍^. .^₎⟆ Hump the hand that petSs you or whatever #nssfw꠹
ALWAYS NICE TO SEE A FELLOW #BURGUNDYBADDIE PULLING GOLD MEDAL NUMBERS. #GUTTERTRASHEXCELLENCE. THANK YOU CRONUS. VERY COOL.
>>| need. big. fat. bulge. #nsfw
₍^. .^₎⟆ Be!ng mounted by Ssomebody w!th a major ssstrength d!fference than me.... gett!n manhandled, pa!led raw and all ! can do !s lay there and take !t #nsfw꠹
When in döubt: jerk it öut ör whatever the fuck #nsfw
₍^. .^₎⟆ ! d!d sSssay ! would be freak!ng !t꠹
:33< those are so furking hot yeah!!!
OH... >:]
₍^. .^₎⟆ ! love thoSse v!deos where a guy !s so turned on and desSSSspurrate he’ss barely touch!ng h!mSself at all and h!s bulge !Sss leak!ng l!ke a faucet #nsssfw꠹
uke or seme
They say never stick y0ur dick in crazy but what if the dick is als0 crazy. What then? #nsfw
Would you rather me rip the bandaid off slowly or quickly?
Yeah.
Maybe I should get married.
Do you recognize the bodies in the water?
H4H4H4!! BW4H4H4H4!!! >:D SHOUT OUT TO @CONT41N3D4RM4G3DDONS FOR M4K1NG MY K41JU DR34MS COM3 TRU3!!! HTTPS://CDN.1MGCH3ST.COM/F1L3S/F46930217373.PNG #NSFW #S3LF13
i abs0lutely despise everything y0u just said
y0u d0n't fucking say
i want y0u dead
fuck y0u
st0p fucking saying that
i think i hate y0u
Yawn. ^ Hint that I am tired.
0kay
what