Colonel Sassacre (death by jigsaw)
@colonelSassacre
You can't reason with your heart; it has its own laws, and thumps about things which the intellect scorns.
I am going... joker mode baybe.
YOUR SILLY LITTLE TRICYCLE CAN ONLY GET YOU SO FAR IN THIS LIFE. YOUR SICK AND TWISTED JOKER STYLE ANTICS AND LIFESTYLE WILL COME TO AN ABRUPT END UNDER THE BUMPER OF MY 2006 LINCOLN TOWN CAR. MARK MY WORDS.
[BEGIN MESSAGE] i h0pe every0ne iz we||. [END MESSAGE]
I BELIEVE I'M DOING VERY WELL, WAS KILLED MINUTES AGO, BUT FOR THE MOST PART PRETTY WELL. HOPE YOU'RE ALSO DOING WELL YOUNG TROLL.
HTTPS://FILES.CATBOX.MOE/DOA2R3.PNG I WAS DRAGGED OUT OF MY FAVORITE "EMPIRE LIMITED-TIME EDITION" QUEEN SIZED LAZY BOY TO RESPOND TO A KIND MESSAGE. @TAUTOLOGICALTECHNIQUE I WILL FIND YOU AND I WILL REPAY THIS KINDNESS OF YOURS TENFOLD. MARK THESE WORDS. YOU WILL BE TREASURED BY THOSE THAT LOVE YOU.
YOUR DAMN ASSASSINS FAILED THEIR JOBS MY LITTLE FRIEND. NEXT TIME DON'T SEND A GOOSE TO DO A REAL MANS JOB. I'VE BEEN BIDING MY TIME WAITING FOR YOUR GUARD TO DROP.. YOU CAN'T RIDE YOUR LITTLE BIKE FOREVER.
Can you watch this video and see if you have a heart attack? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GMgsFZ4rkEI
HTTPS://FILES.CATBOX.MOE/ZGZ6QX.GIF GADZOOOKS!! AAAAH!! OH EVEN!! DEAR GOODNESS!! I'VE BEEN KILLED. SPOOKED SO BADLY I WAS KILLED INSTANTLY ON IMPACT WITH THE FLOOR AS MY HEART EXPLODED. I HAVE SINCE LEFT THIS MORTAL COIL.
( Ꮚ⚀ꈊ⚀Ꮚ) < I uh... ( Ꮚ⚀ꈊ⚀Ꮚ) < Kinda love my friends an awful bunch? ᴗ(ᴗᏊᄒꈊᄒᏊ) < There are more-a-y'all than I reckon I've ever met people in my life...not even sure how t'handle havin' followers...b-but... ᴗദ്ദി(ᴗᏊᄒꈊᄒᏊ)ᴗ< Thank YOU. Genuinely. I ain't gonna downplay it none. I'm humbled endlessly...hopefully this ping ain't too imposing-like, 'n th'sight 'o my smilin' face can brighten yer day just a smidge...!!!! Means more than anythin' t'behold and be held in yer thoughts...just as EWE were mine, all followers!!! #NotEnoughInventorySpace #SFW #YouAreOverencumbered!!! #XChittr #GygaxianBholding
OH GEEGOLLIE! YOUTHFUL AND MIRTHFUL TROLL, IT IS AN HONOR TO BE CONSIDERED A FRIEND TO SOMEONE SO POLITE, POIGNANT WITH THEIR WORDS, AND GIVING WITH CONSIDERATE OPINIONS WHEN SEEKING COUNCIL. KEEP ON KEEPING ON LITTLE TROLL.
THAT'S IT!!!! NO MORE MONKEYING AROUND!!!!!! HTTPS://CDN.IMGCHEST.COM/FILES/F869D50EAB9B.PNG
HOOLIGANS I SAY. HOOLIGANS ROAMING THESE STREETS, SOMEONE NEEDS TO TEACH THESE DARN KIDS A HEARTFELT LIFE LESSON TO GET THEM TO TURN THEIR LIVES AROUND..
HOW OFTEN DO YOU FEEL LIKE YOU'VE "FUMBLED THE BAG"? I THINK THAT'S HOW YOU USE THE TERM. I SEEM TO KEEP PUTTING MY PROVERBIAL FOOT IN MY OWN MOUTH.. IT'S JUST HARD TO NOT GET SO EXCITED ABOUT ALL THESE BIG FISH "BABES" ON THIS SITE..
im alwvays saying this man
FINALLY SOMEONE ELSE THAT UNDERSTANDS MY PLIGHT. YOU GET ME, CRONUS. WE SHOULD "HANG OUT" SOME TIME, I HAVE A FINE CUBAN CIGAR WITH YOUR NAME ON IT.
oh hell yes i lowve cigs. ill talk about fishy milwves all day vwith you old man.
A MAN AFTER MY OWN HEART. I TOO AM A LOVER OF FINE TOBACCO PRODUCTS ALL THESE DAMN MODERN RESTAURANTS HAVE BANNED SMOKING INSIDE, I'M SURE WE COULD FIND A WAFFLE HOUSE TO "CHILLAX" AND "MAX" WITH POSSIBILITY TO "RELAX" AT OUR LEISURE, YOUNG CHAP
HTTPS://FILES.CATBOX.MOE/2EV23M.PNG JUST A SILLY LITTLE PICTURE WITH MY SWEETHEART OF A DAUGHTER FROM QUITE A WHILE AGO.. THEY REALLY DO GROW UP SO FAST. COULD YOU BELIEVE SHE HAS HER OWN LITTLE FAMILY NOW? BLOWS MY MIND THAT THEY CALL HER NANNA NOW..
DON'T GET IT TWISTED MY BIG PLATE OF SASHIMI, I THREW OUT MY BACK MOMENTS AFTER THAT PICTURE, BUT IT WAS WORTH IT!
pff, yea t)(at makes moray sense u ol windbag embarrfis)(in im like quadruple yo age n yet never t)(rew out my back t)(o jus sayin
IT IS INDEED! SHE WAS SUCH RAMBUNCTIOUS LITTLE LAS THAT COULD PRANK WITH THE BEST OF 'EM!
OHHOOHOO! I'VE TRIED MANY TIMES OVER TO "THROW OUT THAT BACK" :^P CAN'T COUNT THE AMOUNT OF TIMES I THREW OUT MY OWN IN THOSE ENDEAVORS.
snrk o)( my fuckin cod u goofy pervert c)(ill on t)(e post about yo )(uman daug)(ter buoy
oh my god you're colonel sassacre? you have a chittr? how even.
PLEASE EXCUSE MY BIT OF "GOONIN'" AS THE KIDS SAY, I GOT TOO FAR AHEAD OF MYSELF. I JUST SEE A BIG FISH ON A HOOK AND CAN'T HELP MYSELF BUT TRY TO REEL IT IN HOOHOO
SOME VERY YOUNG SPIRITED TROLLS I'VE MET ON MY TRAVELS TURNED ME HIP TO THIS WORLD WIDE WEBBED SITE. STILL NO CLUE WHAT I'M DOING BUT I'M JUST AN OLD MAN TRYING TO HAVE A LITTLE BIT OF FUN!
takin s)(ots at a target ain’t nobubbly can )(it atp buoy at least up to game 3B-)
I'LL BE DOING SOME TARGET PRACTICE OVER THE WEEKEND. BET, I'LL MAKE SURE TO HIT MY TARGET NEXT TIME I TRY TO HIT SUCH A BIG TUNA LIKE YOU ;^D
☆ anybody wanna let me shoot things off of their head I’m bored as fuKK☆
I KNOW IT WOULD BE QUITE A BALANCING ACT, BUT DO YOU THINK YOU COULD KNOCK OFF A CIGAR PERCHED ON THE TIP OF MY HAT? WE COULD LOOSE THE SILLY HAT FOR A "REAL" CHALLENGE. I'VE HEARD YOU'RE QUITE A SHARP SHOOTER AROUND THESE PARTS.
☆ oh Kolonel believe me I’m more than just a sharp shooter, I’m a goddamn prodigy with a bullet. Name a time and a place and I’ll practically light the cigar with my gun☆
HTTPS://FILES.CATBOX.MOE/60QOK5.PNG OH MY GOOD TROLL. HOW ABOUT RIGHT NOW?? I HAVE A FINE TIGHTLY PACKED CUBAN CIGAR RIGHT HERE. AND I SEEM TO HAVE MISPLACE MY LIGHTER.. WOULD YOU MIND HELPING AN OLD FART?
((could someone help me justify drawing other peoples trolls when im just playing an old white man ahaha. i'm an artist more then a writer and i just want to interact with people more. im even worse in DMs a few condies can attest to that fact. im just getting the hang of the MSPA style and want to interact with people so badly.))
//genuinely just have the colonel be like “you seem like an interesting muse can I draw you?” And I’m sure most characters would be thrilled and their muns would also love it
((Perhaps the good Colonel has an appreciation for trolls and wants to draw them as a hobby! After all he married one
(( Could show up to various msparp and draw the events? Though idk how concerned you are about "how did this white guy get on alternia))
(( being a wife guy to the queen has helped a lot in trying to justify things and my bad memory of lore stuff ahaha. but you're right, that would help a lot and it just being his perspective of a moment is more then enough to draw funny moments. i'll keep this in mind ty))
people love art and do what you want forever!!!
(( THIS IS A VERY good point. I love that idea, im not sure how much of an artist Mark Twain was but THIS guy only draws...we'll see if he draws as good as me at the start or just draws doodoo for the bit ))
(( this is my fav reply so far. i still feel silly going "hello fellow kids" to so many trolls ahahah. im sure once the art flows i'll get the groove of things))
((oh i'm very VERY aware of how much people just love art. it's why i feel so silly playing a character i'm struggling to justify hanging out with others so i could draw them together... maybe he's just making young hip friends and i can talk about what he's learned? DMS scare me so freaking much but i should jump in them..))