♥ liked by @eB
hope mentioned post improvved
₍ᐢᐢ₎★ John dont look at the post below #keepyourhornygifs #staystrongking #nsfw #itslookingscaryforthepervshere
Sirl #breakfastposting
I’ll admit I laughed.
You said the same thing twice, John.
I do not expect much adherence to this #WeatherAnchorWednesday so. I leave you not one, not two, but three options that I managed to put together.
Oh man if it's from my only moderately grizzled mentor figure I only ever just met I guess I got no choice but to believe in myself who am I to deny the wisdom of my forebearers who I just met
👉😎👉
I mean I've been told I'm not funny on a good day I'm just the union rep coach I'm the water girl I'm the grizzled old mentor figure who's gonna reveal in the 3rd act I never made it to nationals
Felt like being sloppy boss
I can pull the suit off too.
you tell one more joke and each bitch medium wide logs off instantly breath heir my whole ass got blown off your own damn roof so full of hot hair whistle stop drive by your stupid buttcheeks ring out doin the windy thing
Oh right. This Thursday, at 7 p.m. EST, this week's edition of #RosesPoolsideDrivein will feature one of my personal favorite movies: 2012's "Sinister". A breath of fresh air in the horror genre, which to my liking flew a little bit under the radar. The only warning I can really think for this film would be depictions of violent deaths.
Oh you adorable dork.
Snicker snicker.
mmmh. reheated nachos.
yep, i knew! it was WILD!!
“The reading comprehension on this website is piss poor” “You want to piss on the poor?!” - Average Chittr interaction.
.i hope the cheese burns cuz you put it in for 10 seconds too many and you forget to switch from a styrofoam plate so it melts and ruins iT
They're trying to comfort me. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/1e90e30798db.png #nsfw
John, please don't.
There is something to be said for the joy of terrible movies of that era. Watch Eragon too. That was terrible.
i think your a little fucked up in the head.
why would you fucking do that to yourself
some one contact me on pesterchum when dave hour is over. i see enough of him off line.
theres nooo fuckinn way i just logged in and yallre makin the lalondehour abt drinking nd bein sad u do those thing every fuckin dayyy uuuuggghhhhh if we get a special hour can it at least b smthn fun goddamn
behold, i am the genius, about to make my ultimate burn: you make me think of ugly person, therefore you are bad. surely i am unmatched in my ability to think. this doesnt say anything about my disney dvd grasp of morality whatsoever.
iT iS g7aD ?
ATTENTION, WORTHLESS CHITTRLINGS. LONG TIME, NO CHITT. THERE HAVE BEEN SOME *AGGRAVATING* DEVELOPMENTS IN MY CAREER AS A PLATFORM USER, AS A CREATOR, AND ABOVE ALL, AS ONE OF THE UNLUCKY JACKOFFS STILL UNACCOUNTABLY FORCED TO EXIST IN A PLACE AND TIME WITHIN A MULTIVERSAL CONTINUITY OF ENDLESS, CACOPHONOUS FUCKRUMPUS PARADOX CHICANERY. BECAUSE I'VE BEEN BUSY TRYING AND FAILING TO WRIGGLE OUT OF THESE DEVELOPMENTS, I HAVEN'T REALLY BEEN AROUND TO PROVIDE AN UPDATE. I'M GOING TO DO THAT NOW. SO DON'T MAKE ME REPEAT MYSELF, BECAUSE I WON'T. I'LL JUST PULL UP THIS CHITT, SEIZE YOU VIOLENTLY BY THE HEAD, AND SHOVE YOUR BLOODSHOT GANDERBULBS AGAINST THE SCREEN UNTIL THE AMBIENT HEAT COOKS THEM LIKE EGGS. READ, SHITSPONGE. READ THIS AND GET OFF MY DORSAL RIDGE ABOUT IT, BECAUSE I'M GOING TO GIVE YOU THE WHOLE. FUCKING. SCOOP. STARTING WITH THE BIG ONE. I WORK FOR THE FELT, NOW. I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING. I CAN HEAR THE QUESTION AT THE VERY FRONT OF YOUR THOUGHTSPONGE DOING BACKFLIPS, FRONTFLIPS, CARTWHEELS, AND ACROBATIC FUCKING PIROUETTES. "KARKAT, WHAT KIND OF TURBO-CHARGED JUJU-FLAVORED CRACK HAVE YOU BEEN SMOKING TO DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT? DIDN'T YOU SPEND YOUR ENTIRE SESSION FIGHTING THIS JOLLY GREEN MANLET AND HIS BUMBLING CADRE OF BUMBLING ASS-BURGLARS? WHAT IN THE FRESH, FULMINATING *FUCK* MADE YOU SIGN A CONTRACT WITH *THESE* LOONEYBLOCK TIME BANDITS?" THE SHORT ANSWER? THE MIME MADE ME DO IT. LITERALLY. MY SPONGE STILL HURTS FROM WHERE HE SHOVED HIS PRONG IN IT LIKE A GLOVE AND MADE ME TYPE UP THAT APPLICATION. AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE PLAN IS HERE, BUT I'M WILLING TO BET *ANYTHING* THAT HE'S GOT ONE. SO YES. AGAINST MY WILL. AGAINST MY BETTER JUDGEMENT. AGAINST A THOUSAND ETERNITIES OF BALEFUL, ENDLESS SUFFERING, I HAVE A NEW NINE TO FIVE. AND WITH IT, A NEW TITLE. ONE WHICH I AM *OBLIGATED* TO USE IN OFFICIAL CAPACITY, BUT I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU CALL ME "CHALKBOX" WHILE I'M OFF THE CLOCK, I'M GOING TO INVENT A NEW WAY TO PERFORM A LOBOTOMY. FUCK YOU, KURLOZ. FUCK YOU, SCRATCH. AND MOST OF ALL, COMING IN HARD WITH THE FUCK YOU X3 COMBO, IT'S A WHOPPING FIVE-SCOOP, CHOCOLATE-DRIZZLED FUCK YOU SUNDAE FESTOONED WITH OBLONG BUNCHFRUIT, WHIPPED CREAM, SPRINKLES, AND A CHERRY-RED MIDDLE FINGER ON TOP FOR MR. MALDING GREEN MANLET HIMSELF. I'M WEARING THE BADGE OUT OF SPITE. I AM CLOCKING IN FOR THE LONGEST DAY AT THE LONG DAY FACTORY I HAVE EVER WORKED. AND IF I EVER MANAGE TO CLOCK OUT, THERE WILL BE *HELL* TO PAY. ANYWAYS. I HAVE TO GO MOP UP A NASTY, REEKING PUDDLE OF NON-NEWTONIAN ECTO-PHLEGM, OR SOMETHING. HERE'S A PICTURE FOR THE ALGORITHM. THIS IS THE CHALKBOX, SAYING, "GO BRING THAT PILE OF DIRTY CUPS AND PLATES IN YOUR RESPITEBLOCK TO THE SINK, YOU FILTHY, WALLOWING SLOBHOGS." HTTPS://CDN.IMGCHEST.COM/FILES/67CB4DD16DFF.JPG
#datme sometimes the candids r rlly cute but they did catxh @eB in his socks n sandals https://images.squidge.org/images/2026/05/18/candid.png
awwww awwww awwwwwwwww the tea leaves @ the bottom of my cup look like a cat 🥺🥺🥺 thats so fuckin cuuuuuuute (remebrs tasseography) ah fuck
had 2 slices left of this pizza which OBVS aint dinner enough so i grabbed a bag of doritos w/ it and now im wondering what other triangles could i possibly add to make this more mathematically satisfying
#nowplaying https://open.spotify.com/track/7gNxo9WO00wWYZkjsVES2O
I keep seaing landdwellers attempting to “translate” glubposting like it is some kind of decorative typing quirk instead of w)(at it actually is. W)(ic)( is adorable, by t)(e way. Please continue. You must understand, glub is not simply replacing words wit)( ocean puns and calling it a day. If it were t)(at easy, every rustblood wit)( a dictionary and too muc)( confidence would be capable of reproducing it properly. T)(ey are not. Glub is cadence. Implication. Pressure. -Emotional undertow. A conversational current carried beneat)( t)(e literal meaning of t)(e words t)(emselves. Two seadwellers can )(old an entire second conversation beneat)( t)(e visible one wit)(out a single outsider noticing. Tone s)(ifts. Repetition. Intentional misuse of aquatic terminology. Placement of symbols. Timing. A single “glub” can mean reassurance, mockery, t)(reat, flirtation, mourning, or a declaration of dominance depending entirely on context and psyc)(ic projection. And Y-ES, before anyone asks, projection matters. People forget t)(at our kind did not claw our way to t)(e top of t)(e )(emospectrum t)(roug)( pretty fins and dramatic capes alone. Seadwellers once possessed a psionic repertoire vast enoug)( to drown civilizations in silence. Or so t)(e oldest stories claim. T)(en )(istory c)(anged. T)(e useful gifts were cultivated elsew)(ere. Culling became specialization. T)(e lowblood castes in)(erited and refined abilities t)(at once belonged to t)(e dept)(s t)(emselves w)(ile our own powers narrowed into somet)(ing subtler. Stranger. W)(at remained was glub. A language s)(aped as muc)( by instinctive psyc)(ic bleed as spoken communication. )(alf verbal exc)(ange. )(alf emotional tide. T)(e last relic of somet)(ing enormous. Or maybe t)(at is just imperial romanticism. 38) Maybe we just really like fis)( jokes and making everyone else uncomfortable. Difficult to say. Regardless, if you ever sea two seadwellers speaking and suddenly realize you cannot quite tell w)(et)(er t)(ey are t)(reatening eac)( ot)(er, flirting, discussing politics, or planning a massacre? Congratulations. You are finally beginning to understand glub. 38D
id wave a hankie @ u as yr leavin all teary + this playin in the BG https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bbt2G71uT1M
do not break the illusion 4 me i KNO the most likely explanation is "some1 made an account 2 RP their fave videy game charas" but i want 2 live in the world where glados and sans both literally have chittr accounts let me live in that world plzplzplz
i worked for a sweep at alternian eagle outfitters and won "worst hairline" four times in that period by popular vote. they invented the superlative just for me. i doubt anyone else was honored with it after i got fired for "tanking the vibe". anyway i have bangs now.
there is NO ONE in the world i luv as much as bitches who put a bunch of bullshit on french fries this seafood place has crab fries ive been somewhere and had beef teriyaki fries its ALWAYS a gr8 addition to ur menu IDC what ur restaurants specialty is u got sum shit u can totally put on fries and u SHOULD
life is 2 short 2 be eatin anything u dont wanna! pick those onions off yr burg!! pick those carrots out yr rice!! who caaaaares if ppl think its childish? dont be peer pressured in2 eating fuckin onions!!
https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/c18d22db47cb.png https://youtube.com/shorts/Aq3OQrPcVV4Y #eridanwweek #imcoming #bouncingonit #iwwantcandy
An #eridanweek finale official post. #gore #murder Good morning, all!!! For those of you attentive to religious milestones from worlds past, this day holds some significance. For others, it is merely the bookend on yet another long, toiling week. I propose an alternative! Day Five of #eridanweek was an endeavor of such indulgence that on Day Six, I bid you all rest. You may be feeling your own regrets. Remorse, guilt, embarrassment. A FOOLISHNESS for trusting someone close to you, or yourself for allowing that to happen. And perhaps you are even thinking to yourself: "Gee whiz!!! I am such a piece of shit BETRAYER to all things I ever held dear!" Well, come on down to the ORIGINAL #ERIDANWEEK VENUE for the ULTIMATE ACT OF ATONEMENT. This moral laxative is sure to grease the skids on utterly vacating you of ALL the self-doubt and emotional complications presently bloating you to discomfort. Your FIGURE OF WORSHIP is here to REDEEM YOU OF YOUR SINS. My sins! And most of all, HIS OWN PUTRID REPREHENSIBLE SINS. PAST AND PRESENT. You are reading this correctly. This evening, Eridan Ampora WILL BE CRUCIFIED. He will die FOR YOU, dearest worshipper. And we will all feel a whole lot better about ourselves. And if you personally were murdered by Eridan Ampora, YOU are entitled to a FREE JUMBO BUTTERSCOTCH TURNOVER. Visit the NANNA'S HANDPIES stand to redeem both this offer and your own moral failings. Happy fucking Eridan Week, traitor! >:( @caligulasAquarium
#fatgirlskissing
I have yet to consider this. Your mind truly is so expansive in ways I could never approach, John.
♯ward yourself ♯whiteboy
IM NOT ASHAMED OF BEING FAT. I AM STATING IT AS A FACT. I'M FAT.
#pinned https://file.garden/acSEE28XdjJpG1Nj/AnizzyDance.gif
#nowplaying https://open.spotify.com/track/3OOFEF20WqtsUPcRbPY3L7