Pickle Inspector
@pickleInspector
Fondly regarding this carnation.
with my p0wer i decree that y0u must c0mpete t0 entertain me and the winner gets a cust0m badge. submissi0ns are n0w cl0sed 0u0 addendum. y0u can try as much as y0u want. y0u d0n't need t0 be funny just bring me m0re j0y then every0ne else.
Hello again, Aradia. I've brought you a single ounce of fresh wet mozzarella from my sunlit stroll to the market. I wish you great joy.
1 of dese days dere aint gona be an ace dick round here no more and den wat will u all do -from the office of ace dick detective agency
Don't fill my head with such grim portents, Ace Dick...
- Since I amm dying. I iwill need to relieve mmyself of mmy belongings in mmy Last Will & Testammintyl - I have all these swords I need to get rid of. 🤣🤣 My custodian would fetch themm fromm the wild for mme as a wiggl'er. -And try to teach mme how to sword fight with themm. - I primmarply used staplergunkind though. You know when I was alive 😂😂😂 Anyways can you reply to this if you want a sword fromm mmy Mintyl Estate, because I've got mmy lawyer on the online right now. And I put himm in mmy Will thrice, for somme reason 🤣🤣 #FeelingRandomm #HandsCold #TakeMySwords #SoFreammkingMany #LOL
Mintyl, I will gladly take up your sword and give to it a firm Handy in your name!
Jake has apparently paid the crew exorbitant fistfuls of cash to see which salamander on board can blow the bubble faring best against the sea breeze. I come up to the pool deck and he has them lined up blowing salivary membranes ROILING with vape cloud. #substances I guess.
"Blow the bubble faring best against the sea breeze." What prose!
- Hand your hardest Pickles over to us at Handy Business! We'll Handle themm quicker than you can say "BOY SKYLARK" so you can get back your powergamming daymmares! 😁🙌👏🗡️⚔️ - Use mmmmy code #FATALHANDY for 30% NOW!! 👏🏹💣😆
What was your favorite part of #eridanweek? ❤️ - RUMBLE NIGHT ♠️ - IWANTCANDY NIGHT ♦️ - TROLL LADY GAGA ♣️ - THE CRUCIFIXION
I'm putting up an icon of Saint Eridan in my home like a good Catholic.
Porterhouse, rare. Eggs, over easy. Single malt scotch, NO ICE. Strawberry shortcake. How is everyone else's evening faring.
I thank you all for one hundred followers! I have a celebratory post regarding the various differentials between the most common types of buttercream in the works. You're welcome in advance.
I'm on tenterhooks awaiting your great work!
>([got t#e cylinder out]
>([w#en yall gonna stop eating s#rimp wit# a wimp and start eatin lobster wi#t a mobster]
I'm eating game hen with a grey friend. :)
Oh goodness I think I might have overdone it a little earlier, feeling much better now that I've sobered up again...
Our bitterest enemy, that mystifying liquor called Scotch... #substance
Oh no! Please drink this hot water fortified with delightful soothing honey and tangy lemon. I've poured it into a rocks glass so it's more hardboiled.
- Your Pickle, I Handle it. Invoice you. We 're business. Picklesolve goes Handiworks Bye Bye, a lways on CMS
We're trained in shorthand!
>([anybody know #ow to get a cylinder unstuck from a mini m&ms tube filled wit# butter and microwaved mas#ed banana. its really important t#e cylinder remains un#armed #nsfw]
>([just know t#at t#e stuff inside is warm but not getting any warmer]
Do you have any salad oil? Additional lubrication may help your cylinder out of this Pickle.
>([t#e seal around t#e cylinder is really firm man im not sure if i can get anyt#ing in t#ere]
Oil creeps! That's why the bottle's always a little greasy. Just apply it little by little and might sink in.
- ANNOUNCING: Fromm the business-mminded mminds of THE @pickleInspector and mmyself (mme) ... a REVOLUTIONARY REBRAND. I KNOW you have problemms. And those problemms require the mmust helpful, hands-on solutions. We can and will help. - HANDY BUSINESS SOLUTIONS: "A Helpful Handy for your Pickle!" Because we aren't letting go of your Pickle until we've thoroughly Handled it!
Honored to be a part of this, Mintyl. Looking forward to sharing these Pickles with you, hand-in-hand.
The authorities are posted up on every corner. I'm wanted for the cold-blooded annihilation of a submarine sandwich.
I am wholeheartedly intrigued by you.
-_-
I am the man feared by the medicine-ball and the jump-rope.
PICKLE ARE YOU FEARED BY PEANUTS BECAUSE THIS ONE IS MAKING ME FEAR