Pickle Inspector
@pickleInspector
Fondly regarding this carnation.
O swiftly-filling chick pea: Strive zealously to bestow upon me my evening meal!
If you can't remember the last time you washed your bedsheets, let this missive be your reminder to do so!
If there's a Pickle to be grasped and turned over at #eridanweek, rest assured--#ImComing!
My new cat is named Athena after the Greek goddess of purring and nuzzling.
This Is A Post I Think My Wife Would Quite Enjoy Seeing On Her Timeline Later And As Such Ive Rechitted It
Absolutely shellacked off two rounded teaspoons of Metamucil.
You are the salt of the earth.
This sauce in my pot is so red that the Pinkertons are after it.
The seagulls were chatty outside my window this morning. Fine by me - they got here first.
I've been a city boy my whole life. I like to see life built on top of itself.
- LOL! Look at us! The stemmcluster slickers! 😆😆
Oh, don't mind me. I'm just reading a book. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/0fdc044d0399.png
- Inspector, you look snazzy as all fricking HECK! Even old, lord Death in his roiling robes couldn't hold an ignition stick to you! 😆
The authorities are posted up on every corner. I'm wanted for the cold-blooded annihilation of a submarine sandwich.
I have heard those cold cuts never stood a chance. Keep trucking, Inspector.
I am the man feared by the medicine-ball and the jump-rope.
PICKLE ARE YOU FEARED BY PEANUTS BECAUSE THIS ONE IS MAKING ME FEAR
Taking a stroll to the market to purchase a single, beautiful slice of gabbagool.
My hat hides a carefully-maintained tonsure. I entrust you with this secret.
It's good to eat a baked potato.
They're calling it "the finest argument ever imagined in the shower." I won flawlessly.