♣ mediated by @pulchritudePowerhouse
$eriou$7y, You Guy$ Fumb7ed Thi$ One?? I'd Be Fucked Up For Re@7
Clocked
Sleuth he w★s my second f★vorite ch★r★cter! He's su★ve! (★lso the quiche w★s lovely)
★lso he oddly reminds me of Sleuth. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/22f42db4cd24.png
Ye★h..... it'll h★ppen.
... I can't pretend I didn't see this.
now is not the fucking time you stupid son of a bitch my HUSBAND is fucking gone and if you somehow have something to do with it its gonna take a fucking miracle to keep my hands out of your entrails
if i didnt repsect other mes game so mich, id fight ur ass
you didnt even have this extreme of a reaction when i was all dolled up for the gala. i feel like im learning things about you.
i know that im the one who made a lying thread for lying in but im too vain of a woman. i cannot make myself say these words even out of commitment to the bit. https://images.squidge.org/images/2026/05/18/IMG_8848.jpeg
They shouldn't have given you that phone back yet.
Sure thing, I’ve got a c o m i n g to plan for and an a s c e n s i o n right after! See ya then. :)
Thank goodness this is a lie.
hmm? no he has entirely free reign of the house and surrounding property. i cant imagine why i would keep a grown man on something as degrading as a collar and leash.
Have you finally leashed that man of yours?
there was a girl who grew up with a ticking timer over her head. every day the numbers stared her down dropping steadily-- years, months, days, hours, minutes, seconds getting smaller. "when this timer reaches zero" an old man told her "the whole world is going to end." the timer was such a constant in her life that even when she wasnt looking at it she knew exactly what it would read, how close it was to zero, to the very second. "inevitable" "inescapable" it was supposed to be this thing twined inseparably with the very nature of the world she was created in. when the timer reached zero her world still stood. the destruction that was supposed to rain from the sky didnt come. but it was supposed to. she knew that it was supposed to. the timer wasnt meant to read zero but for a fraction of a second before it was obliterated with everything else. but it stared at her and kept staring for years. it kept staring for a decade. the girl could not be relieved that the world still stood. there was something more precious to her that could not continue to exist without that destruction. she feared every day that it might disappear as though it had never been there in the first place because without the destruction it wouldnt have been created. so the girl spends that decade examining everything as closely as possible, testing every possibility, making every adjustment, trying and trying and trying to bring that destruction she had been promised. the precious thing starts to hate her and she lets it. she doesnt need for it to think well of her she just needs it to live. the precious thing doesnt disappear and the girl cant prove that it isnt in part due to her efforts. maybe the work shes doing is promise enough of a coming destruction that the universe wont write it off as a failure just yet. but what if she eases up? what if she becomes satisfied with a decade of undisturbed status quo and decides that nothing has any consequences after all? what if that choice to stop is what kills her precious thing? i dont know how to resolve this story satisfactorily. im sorry that i cant give you a nice conclusion.
UnfortUnately, "leaving the office" does not always mean yoU've reached the oUtside, as i'm sUre yoU're aware.
the secret, love, is that the lever had already been pUlled by the time yoU landed on earth. yoU were not the platform operator, bUt the engineer - if yoU had sabotaged the train, it woUld only have derailed and killed all involved parties. i am sorry, love, bUt paradox space can be crUel. yoUr complicity was beyond yoUr control.
I think you’d look fetching in his coat.
I'm Not A Beast. I'll Season You First.
YOU HAD NO TROUBLE POSTIN YOUR OTHER PP
I'm not clicking on that, but you're getting mediated anyway.
dang, sleuth
woa 6h... thats so amny lipstiCks
Nice cock, bro.
c< yes, 10 Kult, ONly 10, defiNitely NOt aNy MOre >c
luckily nothing like that will ever happen to me! hehe, poor guy.
Poor puppy...
hehehehe that's adorable!
aw. what a good mutt.
new pinned chitt. ☺️🤭🥰
are you trying to tell me that we have some house training in order?
hes more of a puppy if anything.
my type also happens to be the one who obediently eats whatever i offer him right out of my hand.
Highly recommend it.
i did something similar to that. or really he did it of his own volition. but that might not be a bad idea.
Did you at least get a collar and leash for whoever this is?
^yeah i can work with whatever you got but im assuming the person you intend on proposing to can see this post???? if youre being serious at least>
)(ttps://i.imgur.com/5JucAAk.png
@aspiringPessimist and @chillerAficionado could get it ngl ♠️
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HOOKERS, SLEUTH. HOOKERS.
:< go steal from your old man
I Cannot Stop Toying With That Old Man. It's A Sickness Of Mine. #suggestive #positive
Men are so easy.
@pulchritudePowerhouse You two are so cute. ::::)
Congratulations? :3 (i've been told this works as a mischievous smile)
Ladies, show this man the beautiful wonders of this world. ♥︎
>> hehehe proud of you tho
Please Do Apply Though, I Like It When The Bruises Make Him Jealous. :> #nsfw
metap)(ors always escape t)(e simple salt of t)(e eart)(. scurry back to your office. you mig)(t miss a dame t)(ere.
The fact that you're even commenting on this post is 8lackmail enough. You might as well just send it.
>> human marry h¡m maybe ??
Say hi to Larkso for me!
Fuck's sake.
Goodness gracious. Go easy on him.
I'll Be Right Back. This Man Is Not Going To Be The Same After I'm Through With Him. #nsfw #explicit
@bulgeCurator do you do ratings for humans too or just tentabulges and troll junk specifically?
Weak.
" Chat ", Should I Pin The Bulge Post? #nsfw
You Give Me Fluttering Insects In My Digestion Sac, I Can't Help But Find It Cute.
areyougoingtoinspecthispickle
YOU are the one soliciting the penis psychic knowing it’ll be posted!
@pulchritudePowerhouse HHHhuman bulges aren't my specialty. Many humans don't have the necessary nerve receptors needed for my psionics to be fully engaged. #nsfw #bulgerating As other humans know, I, uhm, use a different rating system. Pulchritude: 8. I would say that your is highquality. Clean,andfreeof any notable issues. Primary flaw is a slight curve to the right. Vim: I'd say a solid 4 Vim. Hhh This isn't anything to be a shamed of. You only just cap out at about two sessions. Length: Youhaveanadmirablelength rating of 6. Mind you these are not units. Girth: HHhfor ahuman you have a girth rating of 5! Imagination (X-Factor): 0. I don'tthinktheresanything else to say. Just a good human bulge! Smells of whiskey and aftershave Tastes of flesh! Hhhhhhhfff
Oh yeah???? And how exactly do you plan on enforcing that???? >::::)
Yeah. Yeah, real su8tle-like.
I'M NOT THINKIN' ABOUT ANYONE'S DAMN ASSHOLE.
◌ Reading chits that are intended to be vague when you have explicit knowledge that tells you exactly what they're talking about... is very amusing. ⧂
Phil...please.
what are you serious!
Definitely going to be behaving.
maybe it's just not in human psychollogy for a good hate fuck. #nsfw
I've watched you plenty of times. I know I prefer to let my gun or my smarts do the talking, but I've been practicing a few basic moves. Can't let myself be dead weight on the team!
[Controversial Casper take just so you guys know he's still alive. Kind of funny, also pretty real if you're being honest with yourself.]
She wont stop me
• heh • i'm teasing
da dog girl is wird and raceist but she is also being held in LITERAL SLAVERY and problem sleuth want to FUCK her ok man -from the office of ace dick detective agency
I'm sorry Sleuth but this is a cute little animal with tiny little fat round ears and a sniffynose. You could be picked up and domesticated.
you catch the mousey and you hold it in your mouth like :3 before trotting back home with your long tubey body
literaly the thing u ppl dont understand is dat i dont care about any of u -from the office of ace dick detective agency
concept: the sheer eroticism of fisticuffs making sweaty bloody contact with another body spit flying as that surge of adrenaline rushes through the both of them writhing with tangled limbs nose to nose grunting and groaning as they trade pins training for it the safe word is three hard taps (tags: im not really sure, #rankworks, chute training mention, #violence, #nsfw, wrestlefic, exhibitionism in the form of a crowd, quads unmentioned, archive rating: M)
are you serious
i am a1m0zt zcared t0 azk. but what w0u1d y0u add t0 a 1ady r0b0t?
8=D < Oh... *Trots away slowly and sadly.*
you just dont understand the hemospectrum pal
im sorry for putting indigo gals so lovw on my ranking i vwas thinking of like the vweirdo aristocratic ones but most of em are pretty cool and hot im so so sorry babygirl @ardourcorvwidae
Any Lowbloods or Humans in†eres†ed in being dissec†ed? #gore
• ok removing the pens from my hair • as many as i can find at least
I already told you what the mediate button is for when I use it generally. #andiknowyourereadingthis #anthraxanthraxanthrax
da only shot you miss is da one you shoot out da wrong side of da gun #inspirational #quote #fuckofffriday -from the office of ace dick detective agency
:33 < mewr the sleuth! :33 < solve the mystery!
Sleuth, sit down....
Can some8ody cut this dude off????????
Hey-- BREATHE. You don't have to do that 😭
>> :)) #juડtfoodforthought #thatડa11 #tota11y
*jingles controversially across the tl*
Got there in the end.
ITS OKAY TO BE GAY GAY DETECTIVE
>> who knowડ, ¡f you exp1ore ડmth new you m¡ght f¡nd ડmth even better than women and waff1eડ
@pulchritudePowerhouse sleuth sleuth sleuth sleuth sleuth sleuth sleuth sleuth sleuth sleuth sleuth -from the office of ace dick detective agency
thanks man
>> when ¡ડ the 1aડt t¡me you had a ડurpr¡ડe hot date, ડ1euth ડ¡r
hiw do i open dm help help help help -from the office of ace dick detective agency
c< i respect tHe OrigiNal, it cHaNged tHe Net 4ver, ill agree witH tHat, but i just liKe HOw tHe jasH versiON sOuNds MOre, alsO i liKe tHe way tHe latter Half flOws >c
Ever have an Oreo Reese's Cup? Shit's life changing.