CLUBS DEUCE!
@confusedDemolitionist
HE AND HIM IS ACCEPTABLE! dolce of clubs- a SUITE TREAT. ALL WOMEN ARE QUEENS.
(( ooc pinned post Deuce edition (Updated 4/27!): consider this page nsfw (violent!) for mentions of head trauma/memory issues, sinister shadow magic, clock admiration, and incendiary devices. if you're not a fan of people reacting to posts incorrectly for the bit then be warned. clubs WILL be hitting that mediate button. art is mine unless otherwise stated. this is a humanstuck Clubs Deuce! he has no fucking idea how he got here, only that he's certain that none of the crew, felt, and team sleuth folks he's encountered on this site so far are from his own universe. he's begun making contact now that he knows how to PM users. he has a mostly intact DECK OF CARDS. the radio is broken, iykyk. in addition to his CANON inventory he also has postit notes he uses occasionally as visual reminders. most recently he has acquired ALIEN BOOZE (Dersite whiskey) and a CUTTER (a ship! it's small with nary a belowdecks, primarily powered by sails and a rudimentary rudder.) he seems comfortable wayfaring. he's capable of accessing his deck inventory and there's some sort of Something keeping his flip phone from losing battery or cell service, even out in the middle of the ocean. his phone probably shouldn't be able to access chittr. it technically shouldn't be able to do a whole lot of things that it's doing at the moment. but it's fine! probably.)) https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/c71860854262.png
Eventually you will all have baboon uterus' in you.
:: HAVE YOU suceeded IN THIS :: BEFORE OR ARE YOU GOING TO BE :: mutilating PATIENTS WITH AN :: INCOMPATIBLE FOREIGN ORGAN
:: HOW DO YOU TEMPER THE BODY'S :: NATURAL INCLINATION TO :: REJECT foreign GENETIC :: MATERIAL :: HAVE YOU BEEN GIVING THESE :: "patients" OF YOURS :: IMMUNOSUPPRESSANTS?
:: HOW LONG DO YOU INTEND ON :: keeping THESE PEOPLE IN YOUR :: PHYSICAL CUSTODY :: I CAN'T IMAGINE YOU WOULD :: HAVE MUCH success IN :: CONVINCING ANY OF THEM TO :: STAY ON THE REGIMEN OF THEIR :; own volition
:: HAVE YOU BEEN CONDUCTING :: long term EVALUATION AND :: EXAMS OF THESE "patients" :: OR ARE YOU SETTING THEM :: LOOSE AFTER COMMITTING :: grievous malpractice AND :: ACTING ON AN ASSUMPTION :: THAT YOUR BARGAIN WITH THE :: DEVIL WILL HANDLE THE REST
DREAMS!!!! who needs 'em! i ain't givin'em away but i don't want em neither!
SLIME THIS SLIME THAT!!! nothin beats couch after a week a sleeping ina closet
løvē slēēpīng īn cløsēts īts nīcē dārk ānd crāmpēd īn thērē
Nothing beats sleeping in the closet after sleeping on the couch.
And I stood there Shivering in my pajamas and Watched the whole world go up in flames And when it was all over I said to myself I̵s̷ ̸t̶h̶a̴t̴ ̶a̸l̷l̸ ̶t̷h̷e̷r̵e̶ ̷i̷s̸ ̴t̶o̶ ̶a̷ ̵f̸i̷r̶e̷?̸
dam i shoaldnt given u all that booze
[̸̻́D̸͔̈e̷̻̋ũ̸̥c̸̓ͅe̵̯̿'̷̝͊s̷͇͗ ̶̺͌c̶̦̋o̴̬͒ọ̷̕r̴̳͗d̴͙̽s̸̳̃ ̸̰̀a̷̮͋ ̶̰́]̷͓͛]̷̛͔]̴̞̈́ ̶̤͌]̷̱̆
THE RAIN IS FUCKING SPICY
⚘t's a b⚘t more than that but yeah
:33< ayyye the mighty huntress is walkin here!!!
ITS TIME FOR ANOTHER TIP FROM THE DRIP THE FOOD FROM INSIDE THE FREEZER OFTEN TASTES BETTER ONCE ITS COOKED IN A TIME MACHINE! OFTEN NOT ALWAYS! WE DONT TALK ABOUT THE ICE CREAM INCIDENT OF 85 THANK YOU #DRIPTIP I LOVE YOU #DRIPTIPNATION AND #DRIPTIPNATIONGIRLEDITION
(( just like deuce I myself find myself in situations today. method acting (locked out of apartment but only for a little while) (check your door before you start laundry kids)
((no i did this recently just going out to grab my doordash. i was SO lucky the mainetence men were on site that day bc dude i would have sobbed (i also left my phone inside)
(( I am EXTREMELY relieved I took my phone with me LMFAO it could have been 20x worse shout-out to being held hostage by emails for a living
((one day i will also be held hostage by emails but that day is not today and i fr always leave my phone in my apartment when i run down 4 food </3
THE WATERS HAVE NOT CLAIMED ME!!!! not from LACK OF TRYING! feel like i really tapped inna somethin here! s'like this ship an'i are the same thing must'a done this inna past life.
https://64.media.tumblr.com/4ee11139f1e33c5a3c64b335ef31fdf3/a5d5bfe8ea5eaea2-90/s1280x1920/3d36ff26d0cfecb7ba75b6012205789dad112628.jpg lunch break
EVERYTHING ALWAYS HAPPENS!!! all of the time! in my life!!! [Attached is yet another grainy shot that looks like absolutely nothing at first. Until you remember that this is a very little man in a sailboat, and that mass of clouds on the horizon is not the sort a single manned boat wants to be seeing. He has already secured everything there is to secure, but he's in for it nevertheless.]
Mafia tip: They don't gotta know.
hotdog world super swirled ketchup dream plate unseen #nonsense
Oh I do give mysellf a sensiblle chucklle sometimes.
THERE IS NO ENDING AND NO BEGINNING!!!!! it's aaaall jsu a reflction #substance [attached is a disconcertingly dutch angled shot looking out over the ocean. because he's on a sailboat instead of a massive vessel he's quite a bit closer to the water. quality is poor, but the color of the sky and the water are the same. there's no hard line separating either of them.]
Please tell me you have rations.
i see you in everything and everywhere
https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/461639369145712640/1498487752625487975/stsmall845x845-pad1000x1000f8f8f8.png?ex=69f156f8&is=69f00578&hm=9ec290a937b449624e84308840c952e4acf507d34c4f3be3351734b4590ffd84&=&format=webp&quality=lossless&width=834&height=834
.gif)
ssssllrrprpppppp
:33< https://media.tenor.com/4mHfxgMxO_YAAAAM/cat-water.gif
