mama
@tiresomeGlamor
ocasional drinker <33
they were rlly on som shit when hitcahi electonics revolutionized da vibrator game #nsfw
Wait is that why I keep seein' those back massagers in dames apartments? Jesus hell, I gotta step up my game if I wanna compete with that.
guyz its throatfuck thursday #nsfwww
Yeah? Fuck must have missed the memo
K--<lager cider ipa or real ale. no other alcohols are an option. what are you drinking.
do you onow where da midnight crew is im never solving this fucking case -from the office of ace dick detective agency
i dunno if i can im so busy doing fuckin nothin rn but maybe anotha time
Harold, don’t make me call your mother. I know you’re just an intern, but I cannot overlook your blatant misogyny.
please dont call my mom they finally started paying me i need this job
Then I suggest getting your act together and cease this slandering of Miss Lalonde at once.
In that case, perhaps all of your mothers will be receiving a call.
Do not force me to ask a favor of @titularTerror. I believe the Lalondes tend to stick together.
layin in bed on ur side hard af when ur boobs hella big n im tryin 2 be on my damn phon #nsfw
Hm, a shame I am missing out on such a view. I can only imagine the perspective.
it sounds less convincing when you say it like that
dr diagnosed me with big fat booty disorder its terminl :(( #nsfw
its endemic 4 us ro lals
I COuLD ADMINISTER 20 CCS. OF PIMP HAND. STAT. THE TREATMENT IS EXPERIMENTAL. GROuNDBREAKING IM THE LITERAL SENSE. LIKE. IT WOuLD PHYSICALLY SHATTER THE GROuND AROuND YOu. I HAVE A WIND uP SPANNING BACK SIX GENERATIONS. BuT IF IT CONNECTS. THE RESuLTANT COLLISIONS MAY CREATE VIBRATIONS STRONG ENOuGH. TO RESTART YOuR FRAIL BITCH HuMAN HEART. AND YOuR TITANIC ASSCHEEKS. MAY JuST SuRVIVE THE OPERATION.
I will be printing out and laminating a screenshot of this for group therapy later this weekend. Thank you. Mom.
wat should mama eat for dinna
Lasagna
Yo+u sho+uld have bo+lo+gnese.
ok guys my shofer (chauffer ) is drinvg me back home he is bald an that is ok
NO. KILL HIM. STRING HIM uP BY EACH THuMB. AND BALD HEAD. TO PLAY INSTRuMENTAL MuSIC. ON HIS BRuISED ASS RIBCAGE. IT IS THE ONLY WAY.
they switchd my waiter for a waitres and let me tell u im in #bonercity #nsfw
need dis clam ate #nsfw
:33< one trillion mewnique blessings uppawn mewr hive! :33< or whatefur mewmans say in this scenyario
mapeyhoov im so sory im still at tha bar im gona call rosie to feed u an apple but i dont think she will ansewer me
i suppor u purple girl i jus tfollowed
dat bitch ass boy waitr cut me off b4 i cld ask for my fckin umbrla im PISSEd
if shethey was a grl she wld kno that its just girly shit!! they hate 2 see a mommy havign a littel fun
I'm sxrry tx hear that chittr user tiresxmeGlamxr!!! I'd hate fxr yxu tx get sxaked if it's rainy!!! Please be safe xut there :(((
incase u forgt... mama knoz best!!!!!
That's right you do!!!! And on the few occasions that you don't you are a wonderful woman anyway and I love you meow.
And a kittycat princess doll!! You probably recognize the Rose part of me most but I am also your late cat Jaspers. Yes I did die but I got better!
I both love you bigtime too!!!!!!! Mom did you know that you are not only my mom twice but thrice over? It's true! Once as Rose once as Jaspers and once again as Jaspers but in a different universe (that's where I went when I disappeared that fateful day!)
Oh mom don't cry you're going to make me cry! I am an emotional little ragdoll you know. Also I hope it provides some comfort that you did get to see me grown up even if it was an alternate version of you who saw me as her mother!