DiStri
@efflorescentHeliophile
Party only stops if you let it. Knight, Prince, Heartbound. he/she/it. I will be substance and hornyposting. Don't like, don't read. DMs open for both business and pleasure.
Maybe the universe is kind after all.
No, this is more like “local woman gets to see talk about tits, is soothed.”
Fuck. As the icing on the shit cake of the last week, I missed fight night.
i don't know exactly what is going on, but that sounds like a whole mess.
“Who want me” the guy in my bed right now, why are all of you guys not okay?
Don’t…don’t actually answer that I don’t want the traumatic backstory infodump.
What on earth did I walk in on?
Next motherfucker to have a medical emergency at my doorstep on a Thursday is getting kicked in the teeth.
Fuck. Finally able to get ready to go to #fightnight.
What kind of dessert should I get...
₍ᐢᐢ₎★ every color macaron #theberryonestastebettertome #thatlittlebitoftartaddsalottotheflavor #ifnotthaticecreamwithrainbowsprinkles
If you ever think “DiStri, I only see you post about eating the same three things,” congrats. You noticed that I’m autistic.
People wish they could make me feel shame. This is mostly a population made up of doctors who hate me.
Time for momma to take a forever shower and jack off before having shitty Chinese-Alternian fusion. #nsfw
but if you take a forever shower, how do you ever get to the shitty chinese-alternian fusion?
Hmmm. Good point. Either I bring it into the forever shower, or I can’t shower forever. That’s so fucked up.
if you take the forever shower, you have to do everything you will ever do in it. absolutely everything.
that is literally so sad. how are you supposed enjoy life if you can't take a forever shower?
It’s okay… I have consolation prizes. Like the delicious shitty food I’ll be eating soon.
that's good at least! you deserve something good to come out of all of this.
Ahem. Taps the mic. Leans in. Gender is a fuck. Do what you want. I am a man and a woman and some secret third thing. I am also the guy your mom thirsts after at three in the morning while you aren’t looking. Thank you. That is all.
Men.
you are found by the men council to be deserving of any you can appeal this decision next summit in five years time
Hiii, Roro.~
That reminds me. I never did get around to requesting the sword saint badge. Oops.
I should re-extend my “discounted healthcare and prosthetics at #fightnight” offer. Not to the hosts. I still gotta be shady, I have a reputation to maintain.
I miss throwing hands.
Soon. I haven’t had a good fight in forever. And the last one I had was less fun and far too emotionally charged.
I come back to find my notifications full of fight night and Zab is posting again? Not bad. Not bad. Maybe I’ll do something other than staring at a fictional man’s ass.
http2://m3dia1.t3nor.com/m/fX3qx7W32G0AAAAC/th3-r3turn-of-th3-king-lord-of-th3-ring2.gif
I should plan my next “making guppy scared of video games” session, too.
Z. wwhat zound i do not vvocalize during your gaming zezzionz for it borez me .Z
I wish he’d just show up and make it hurt, to be honest. #nsfw #nsfwe
This makes me sound more mentally ill than kinky but honestly I cannot be assed. I’m just poking with a stick to see if he’ll message me.
Some of you have no respect for pitchflirting via calling somebody out for checking your account regularly.
I really do appreciate the one ad that’s just a Rick roll.