♦ pitied by @efflorescentHeliophile
i think it iz w0rth n0ting that i am n0t p1anning 0n running fr0m my next inzta11ati0n. my the0retica1 dezire t0 have the b01t rem0ved iz bazed 0n the fact that i w0u1d 1ike t0 be 1ezz reztricted.
s0mehow serket and maryam have r0ped me intwo watching transf0rmers. this is the second epis0de with rob0sexual women. i'm starting tw0 think they aren't watching this for the n0stalgia.
WHEN I BECOME LORDLING EMPEROR OF ALL. I WILL NOT CRACK OPEN MY SERVANTS LIKE OVERRIPE EGGS. AND LET THE GOOEY RESIDuE INSIDE DRIFT INTO MY MOuTH. ME. FIVE DAYS LATER. STARING DOWN AN ESPECIALLY SEAM RIPPABLE CLOVER. HM.
Rejoice, The Pure Love And Unbridled Lust In My Bloodpusher Have Been Replaced With Ravenous Hatred.
[false advert1s1ng. th1s 1s twelve 1nches.] [https://1.redd.1t/gdyu0un23txg1.jpeg]
I'm so fucking scared right now. https://file.garden/acR4O28XdjJpG0lX/chittr%20obamaverse/fear.png
Gave intern Stacy a Bud Light and a pack of cigarettes and told her to "just go look busy." She made me a website. Sure, I guess. I meant more like "draft some legislation" or "impersonate me in emails I don't want to respond to," but I guess that works. She also insisted on using carrd, as she claims it is "camp" and says it is like "the capri-sun wallets of websites." I don't know what that means, but I'm sure it's good. I don't really care. https://baraktrollbama.carrd.co
ok gross no using a hand dupe doesn't mean i won't feel the grease when i clean a pan. at least, not if i don't try REAL hard not to feel said grease. gotta work on that.
how does a team in which one of the members SUBMITS A CAN WIN. HOOFBEAST SHIT #angellsnutritionbllock
I love my boyfriend but I also hate him. He's a massive loser and a nerd.
X Maaaaan my one free day this week (Saturday) just became a not free day. There’s another chance go burn a rival’s production field. I mean I get to use a flamerthrower so it could be worse ig. #substance #violence x
What the fuck. Team Fortress 2 on my feed was not on my bingo card today. Sick.
h0w strange i did n0t think id be seeing that versi0n 0f myself again any time s00n
Is nothing sacred anymore. https://file.garden/acR4O28XdjJpG0lX/chittr%20obamaverse/absolutely%20not.png
I think im a littl3 uptown funk3d up
I wish I could get more watested without vomiting #substance
he never will / believe me
and for that / i'm greatful
i'm thinking about / maybe / investing in another plushie / but i'm down a lot of caegar / so maybe later
>i cut it a little close, what with a bullet grazing my arm so now im laying low waiting for the bozos to pass
OKAY WE’RE GOING TO DINNER STOP BULLYING ME
>why the fuck are both of my followers corps >granted i think the soda one is a small business so fine but a ceo? i need to make it clearer my intended audience i think
>ugh, same. been too high and dry taking risky jobs
yeah, you're definitely not wrong about that. i know some people with magic, but that would turn into a whole thing and it would probably suck. still, i'm a little jealous with how much you seem to know the person you want to be.
I am not responsible for the minds of others! I'm barely responsible with mine!
i try! i also am definitely so many things more than a girl but also i needed my hair to be short and blue? which is hard?
https://media1.tenor.com/m/zg9wCXykMlAAAAAC/spongebob-screaming-then-running-away-spongebob-squarepants.gif
Yeah. I don't like the troll one. Got a problem with that?