call me lassie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D :D :D :D
@farmstinkButtlass
hi everyone! im jade!!! you probably already knew that.... :9 anyway! i like to draw and i like dogs and #pumpkinpiepals so dont be a stranger! also im not a girl or a boy so dont call me that please!
:33 < *ac says shes sorry fur taking so long to pawst new ships, she was busy handling a severe case of social anxiety!!* x33 < *but now shes back with even more #chittrships !! this time featuring @neonAllnight and @melindaandThemoor !!* https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/1b8bff1749dd.png
For what it’s worth, and believe me, priceless would still be a few grand short changed, the work itself is absolutely adorable. So cherish worthy to see another Rose made charitably happy. @farmstinkButtlass Look! Isn’t that precious?
this is so stinking cute!!!!!!!!!!!! barking this to all my friends who havent seen it yet....
:33 < *the huntress is really happy you appreciate her work!!*
WHO THE FUCK REPLACES ALL THE WIDE ASSED NAUGHTY PICS ON A GROWN ASS MANS LAPTOP WITH the picture
john what the fuck i didnt do this i wouldnt even have the picture on standby to contaminate some shit with its dirk its fucking dirk @itsDirk you know its dirk
...is this the same picture as @turntechGodsaid's "tehreveal.mp4"?
much worse no the picture is legendarily bad
i dunno, dude says tehreveal is pretty bad...
it is but ive seen it and like there is not a single frame in tehreveal that comes close to how nasty and fucking unpardonably awful the picture is you could topple nations with this shit pervert entire religions set continents back a hundred years or more it has doomed more sessions than john fucking egberts dork ass
im never going to find out what the picture is am i ._.
for your safety its better just to imagine it because once you see it you dont unsee it and you will spend the rest of your life with that leverage over you you will never not fear it its how the picture works
im not asking to SEE it im just curious what its of??
geez dave!!!!!!!!!!! fine!!!!!!!! look okay....... man this is so stupid. its literally so stupid!! the picture is this really dumb thing that dirk made when he was a little baby edgelord. its kind of like those haunted pictures you can see evil faces in??? i guess???? literally everyone who has ever seen it says it does weird stuff to their phones and brains. except me. i think it just looks really ugly??? but maybe thats just because im a dog. :P
Tread carefully. You never know where vipers dwell and dig their spuriously venom slicked fangs in indiscriminate striking range. What once was a glorious sunrise may prove to be the autumnal fall of humanity, the sunsetting of many a proud and victorious civilization. Betrayal never comes from an enemy. Heartbreak never sourced from one apathetically regarded. And death never comes for those who never lived. What a cruel thing it is. To ever have felt anything at all. What a heartlessly merciless gouging it is. To learn pain previously unknown. To trust and have that inviolable bond broken. Wretched. And unmaking.
would it make you feel better knowing that all the giftcards i got from ""that stuff"" were used to commission you???? because i didnt have any real people money on my island????
Agreeable concession.
yayyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!! im running around in joy and totally not trampling you!
it has been too long i am lighting a ceremonial candle inside a jack-o-lantern to call out to you everyone...are we still #pumpkinpiepals?
ummmmm...... obviously! bark bark bark!!!!! :D
did yall know that @farmstinkButtlass used to have a gaiaonline rpverse account jade was suspicious as hell always minimizing windows when i walked by or when we shared screens and stuff getting all defensive about her art projects then i find the smoking gun cocked in the chamber she leaves her fucking window open onscreen while im helping her deal with some ransomware bs whole ass setting called hot dog shes got this whole animorphs inspired closed species thing going fucking crazy you know the drill original species do not steal energy but make it vintage internet and the NAMES the NAMES killed me shess got characters named fuckin YIPPEE HURRAY HUZZAH just straight up celebration words rhyme or reason just yippee the macro wolf living his truth at like 50+ feet tall stepping on buildings and scratching his ass on big fuckmassive pine trees and sipping on river water so i tried to join in as an anon i was like "jade this is ironically hilarious let me get in on this ground floor ill make a character called FUCKYEAH the micro fox hell be like an inch tall and hell have a sassy attitude and a tiny leather jacket and he can hang his stuff on like toothpick coatracks and shit and steal crumbs" fucking REJECTED she looked me dead in the digital eyes through our pesterchum window and said dave thats not on brand for the celebration theme NOT ON BRAND so now im sitting here realizing my best friend has a whole taxonomy of woohoo themed macro furry yahoos and i cant even get fuckyeah the micro fox into the canon continuity of the series do you know how that feels? do you know what its like to be gatekept from your beastie besties weird size kink adoptable universe by BRANDING GUIDELINES? well i did so i tanked her reputation for the next three years with flamewars and spam and shit talking until being a lassie or being a prick became a bannable offense didnt even mean to i thought she was going to fucking kill me but you know what this psycho girlie said to me? after years of an entire fictional species went up in flames "that was a lot of fun! seeya tomorrow ip :B"
I...that was YOU? Dave. INTERPOL was involved. I thought your username was a tasteless reference to this reprobate. YOU were the Gaia Online insufferablePrick?
gosh that was so much fun!!!! my favorite """arc""" was when you used the plushrump super supporter account tied to diddliwinkerton.ai and pretended a staff member was involved in the woohoo ship wars...... even though i literally knew that guy??? did i ever tell you that jagger was in my pocket???????????? because he almost commissioned fuckyeah posting before interpol got involved. jeez. i hope he was okay in jail after that.....
oh gosh. oh no. rosie??? did you not know??????? this is the best day ever.
jagger was in your pocket? let me in that denim stitched shitfuck coliseum ill beat his ass you motherfucker do you have any idea how much real actual birthday money i spent to pay that account off why didnt you fucking tell me ughghghg whatever whatever jagger sucks this is a personal beef the rarest kind juicy dripping wet and served made to order fuckyeah shouldve been allowed in and you know it plenty of bitches say fuckyeah as a celebratory phrase
he was literally on your side until your doxx turned out to be real!!!! i didnt know he was wanted internationally!! neither did you!!!!???
mod jagger was like, way super supportive of my species when it was first getting started..... so i drew a bunch like soooo much of his adoptable YAAAAY smashing a really specific building in a really specific city. which was... um... kind of relevant later but we wont get into that!!!!!
official!! announcement!!!! from me! lassie!!!!! im all done with baths forever! forever!!!!!!! "youre going to smell bad, youre going to smell like wet dog, what about the other jades?" okay well, how about you manage a double coat with all the fixings!!!!! getting baths is so much work! and everyone hates doing it for me because i cant reach all the important parts unless i use space powers!!!!!!!!!!!!! so there!!! bring a gas mask!!!!! see if i care!!!!! ill roll in snow and walk through your house if you complain about it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #threat!!!! #nobaths #dogbathsareforthedogweak #hygiene
hey!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
stank is a pr0blem and i am a problem s0lver. don't make me get the megid0min again
well they d0n't have noses f0r one. where the hell did they drag y0u off tw0 anyways? i couldn't keep up with them.
honestly??? im not actually sure. they moved really fast and i ended up in a weirdly big hole in the ground for like an hour because the instincts kicked in. meaning. i dug down instead of up for a while..... D: super awkward!!!!
if en0ugh of them get t0gether they might've pulled some time bullshit as well idk. g0ing two take s0me doing t0 get them two drag y0u to a car wash 0r something. seri0usly though what the fuck d0 you mean y0u can't reach parts of y0urself without spacing it?
im really big around!!! im wide!!! with thick chunky arms and back fat and all the stuff that makes it hard to reach!!!! reaching through spacetime sometimes mitigates this but im also extremely ticklish in those spots and its just a bad time??? okay???????? #suggestive
i've seen w0men wider than you'd believe harley. every weekly p0st i've ever made was some0ne i actually met. there's ways and means! or just hire 0ut ig.
huh......... ive been relying on the good will of my friends but maybe i should hire out..... surely there is some dude out there who would be willing to be the sokka to my appa......
ughh. :( :( :( i literally took a doggy bath yesterday. but im all stinky again!!!! it is way too hot around here............ im going to apostate......
hygiene is an unceasing cycle of exhaustion and stress the only way to win is to break the cycle and stop trying entirely
gosh. this is so true. maybe i should just be stinky forever.... people like stinky dogs right???? right???????????!!!!
noooo jade please shower!!!! i know it sucks but how will other dogs pet you if they dont like how you smell...
no.......we cannot be divided along scented jades vs. stinky jades!!! we are all good dogs.....
you know what!!!!! ive had it!!!!!!!!! im making a post about this!!!!!!!