call me lassie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D :D :D :D
@farmstinkButtlass
hi everyone! im jade!!! you probably already knew that.... :9 anyway! i like to draw and i like dogs and #pumpkinpiepals so dont be a stranger! also im not a girl or a boy so dont call me that please!
official!! announcement!!!! from me! lassie!!!!! im all done with baths forever! forever!!!!!!! "youre going to smell bad, youre going to smell like wet dog, what about the other jades?" okay well, how about you manage a double coat with all the fixings!!!!! getting baths is so much work! and everyone hates doing it for me because i cant reach all the important parts unless i use space powers!!!!!!!!!!!!! so there!!! bring a gas mask!!!!! see if i care!!!!! ill roll in snow and walk through your house if you complain about it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #threat!!!! #nobaths #dogbathsareforthedogweak #hygiene
well dave did something similar and it is getting a little old! the radiation is a nice touch however
honestly??? im not actually sure. they moved really fast and i ended up in a weirdly big hole in the ground for like an hour because the instincts kicked in. meaning. i dug down instead of up for a while..... D: super awkward!!!!
i'd have made the barkbeast white tw0 but then it's to0 close tw0 your actual lusus and it gets c0nfusing and fuck it, bigass glasses instead.
if en0ugh of them get t0gether they might've pulled some time bullshit as well idk. g0ing two take s0me doing t0 get them two drag y0u to a car wash 0r something. seri0usly though what the fuck d0 you mean y0u can't reach parts of y0urself without spacing it?
im really big around!!! im wide!!! with thick chunky arms and back fat and all the stuff that makes it hard to reach!!!! reaching through spacetime sometimes mitigates this but im also extremely ticklish in those spots and its just a bad time??? okay???????? #suggestive
i've seen w0men wider than you'd believe harley. every weekly p0st i've ever made was some0ne i actually met. there's ways and means! or just hire 0ut ig.
huh......... ive been relying on the good will of my friends but maybe i should hire out..... surely there is some dude out there who would be willing to be the sokka to my appa......
every pr0blem's got a s0lution and it's usually m0ney and or perverts. i'd kn0w well given my enterprises.
ughh. :( :( :( i literally took a doggy bath yesterday. but im all stinky again!!!! it is way too hot around here............ im going to apostate......
no.......we cannot be divided along scented jades vs. stinky jades!!! we are all good dogs.....
what are you even talking about you literally smell like a dog
you know what!!!!! ive had it!!!!!!!!! im making a post about this!!!!!!!
make it two the only more surefire way to get striderian support besides inconveniencing a jade is inconveniencing a completely different jade
but people say i smell like flowers... cries
you mean like the wet dog plant https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Illicium_floridanum https://www.gardenweb.com/discussions/2029183/wet-dog-plant-illicium-floridanum-
bluh!!!!!!!! bluh bluh bluh. bluh!!!!!!!!! i fell asleep with my dang mouth open and when i woke up...... there was a really big #insect on my tongue which would usually be fine but!!! but!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! my stupid doggy brain kicked in before my people brain!!! i swallowed it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and it was so yucky!!!! it tasted so freaking bad!!!!!
you might think that a funny dog like me prefers to watch...... i dont know, videos about pet grooming or big sticks but actually!!! i like watching people strip a bunch of old paint off of weird furniture. the more nooks and crannies the better!!!! i guess that is still kind of related to big sticks actually..... hmmmmmm.......
i am making!!!!!!! an announcement!!!!! just a small one basically in honor of all the bazillions of jades on this website im going to change my name so that some other jade can be *the* jade and. ill be *that* jade who has a different name!!! but is still technically jade because thats my name still!!! just so that nobody gets confused seeing my name shift over okay??? okay. :D :D :D :D
hellooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!! hiiiii!!!!!!! ive literally been so busy its not even funny and my brain is probably mush from all the unpuppy nonsense that i got up to........ but im back!!!! so im going to do something!!!!!! maybe draw..... maybe do a silly ama........
huge gasp!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! he made it!!!!!!
ummmmmm its kind of hard to explain but my roommate who is also my best friend and sort of the worst guy ever???? you probably dont want to follow him :\
pffff i guess thats fair!!! hes uhh well you will definitely see him around! unless you block him.... but you could also block the tags that he uses which is basically just blocking him :D
@flightyBroad youre never gonna guess who finally jumped the lazy dog!!! or quick foxed??? or whatever
You jest. Surely. You are joking. He has time sparse enough to bail on the proportionate majority of my every last correspondence to the letter. But suddenly, he is on "soc med"? Hilarious. I've got a word or two to spar with the Strider in question. Utterly unapologetic.
give him heck!!!! >:D he totally deserves it because im pretty sure hes breaking like five of his dumb stupid poopoohead creeds right now
:|
:\
i cant interact with that post because im a dog but..... what the heckaroo is a male persuasion??? is that like a table top thing?????? how high do i have to roll to pass a male persuasion?????????!
:? :? :? :? then he should just freaking say that!!!!!!!! jeez....
WHEN I TELL YOu WHAT TO DO. AND YOuR BITCH ASS DOES IT. DOGGY GIRL. NOW PLAY DEAD.
okay but im not persuaded... so i guess youre not very male about it :|
FuCK. I KNEW BEING HALF WOMAN WAS A MISTAKE. CAN I HAVE A NEW CHARACTER SHEET? I THINK I NEED TO KILL MYSELF THIS ONE.
obviously not!!!!! i didnt know what that means and i think its a dumb way to say stuff like that. :| i cant make people say words better but i can definitely sniff at their shoes in a really judgemental way :|
okay you can have a new character sheet but you have to let me help roll your stuffs again because all your stats are super wonky :\ and thats terrible for team composition!!!!!
RuBBISH. ASS. CHEAP NERF. I SHOuLD BE ALLOWED TO POINT BuY. TWENTY STRENGTH. THE OTHER STATS ARE IRRELEVENT ENTIRELY. NO ONE WON'T RESPECT A BITCH AS BRAINY. AND BRAWNY. AS A GuY WITH TWENTY STRENGTH. TOP DAWG.
so youre just going to let all the girls be smarter than you???????? wowwww...... i mean........... if you want to be that sucks at the game........ i guess i really cant stop you at all.....
by the way!!! we are still on for our big fight @walkstabwalK!!!!! im just so freaking busy with some other dumb stuff and im still making the arena........ i had to negotiate about where to put it because apparently the gravitational force of a whole new planet would be irresponsible or. whatever????? who cares!!! i do care im just pouty puppymoding :| :\ :| :\
do your friends ever...... look like an animal but in a really cute way??? because rosie totally looks like a little lamb when shes riiiight out of the shower!! XD #pumpkinpiepals
this makes me so happy!!! i could wag my entire butt off about it but i wont because then i would be #wagless D: anyway this is cute so thanks for sharing!!
tapping my paws in righteous furry!!!!! i mean fury :P but its also furry....... i will totally get you next time probably so dont get too cock!!! pfffhehehehe XD
oh man!!!!! i meany cocky!!!!!! my y key is busted!!!!!!!!!!!!!
oh my gosh she DOES look like a little lamb aaaaaaa!!!!!! im getting cuteness aggression... <.<
guys......................... :( i was having such a great nap and then. :( and then...... :( i farted myself awake!!! it was so loud!! i got scared!!!!!!! now i have to run in circles to get all my freaking freaks out D:
aww. im sorry jade.
this is basically the worst thing to ever happen to me if were not counting that time my gpa died :(
wowww...... this does help a lot more than i thought it would. stops running in circles and flops in a big heap with a big puppy oof sound :B
sad puppy whines........ everyone...... the worst thing ever just happened. i got my freaking #period and everything sucks!!!! like so much sucking is happening right now!!!!!!!!!! who knew gods even still dealt with this stuff?!?!!!!
or any movies specifically of course, hehe.
hmmmmm............. im not really good at deciding stuff to look at.... because i just like looking at the colors or pawing at the screen?? but id be happy to try an anime or cartoons with you! unless they have scooby doo :D i love scooby doo :D :D :D
i could suggest some cartoon, anime, show, and movie ideas if you want! otherwise we could totally watch any scooby doo you want! :)
the original scooby doo show and the whats new scooby doo were the best and nobody can change my mind ever!! but i really do want you to have a good time too, so. tell me what youd like to see! maybe theres a middle ground! :D
Tsk, tsk, tsk, #PumpkinPiePal. My ears doth ring. You really ought to make use of our invocations more often and more directly.
If my vote is to be considered. I love cartoon dogs.
ohhhh nooooo i forgot!!!!! listen. :( im sick right now.....
we are still in the planning phase! once it was time i would certainly ping all of our #pumpkinpiepals!
let's do what's new scooby doo, that sounds great! :D do you have a particular episode or season in mind or should we just start from season 1 episode 1?
starting from the start is always the best place to start!! hehe :B
huh??? what?????? are we talking about smells??????? i love smells a lot even the bad ones oh my gosh oh my gosh!!!! i can tell what you smell like if you want?? since i can sniff across paradox space or whatever? :D
sniiiiiff sniff sniff sniff snifffffff!!! achoo!!!!! hey! you smell like chocolate you jerk! and also?? sniff sniff........ hmm.... you also smell like a pair of sweaty socks that havent been changed in a couple days, worn in brand new shoes?? whats that about????? :? the shampoo is really nice though so overall a good smell!
hehe. it is dog-safe chocolate, i promise! that all sounds completely correct, i'm impressed jade! here is the post i made earlier with some extra details. https://chittr.ing/profile/zoosmellPooplad/8f5f5be1-0d85-40dd-a00b-44805be3e1f6
phew!!!! you really had me going for a second there...... but this all looks right! i think the rose milk muddied up my senses because i completely missed the pizza!! now that i know its there im soooo hungryyyyy :E drooling!!
i'm so happy you like my smell jade! i would love to sniff and lick every inch and crevice of each other and rose once we all meet up for our party. including smelling and taste testing all the food i'm bringing with me, like my meat and donut and all!
i might make a similar post if you dont mind jade! i would also appreciate being sniffed if you dont mind :o
youre totally welcome to do that vice jade!!!! :) let me get my sniffer going...... sniff sniff sniff snifffffffff snorf?!! you smell like..... cosmic glitter and worn out linen and tv screen buzz!! also a little but of doggy but thats just normal for us jades :D would sniff again!
huh....very interesting! im glad youd sniff me again hehe
Can i get one too?
sniiiiiiiiiff sniff sniff........... hey!! heyyy!!! you smell like me?? but also you smell like licorice and well used crocs. doggy shampoo!!!? :D a totally not biased smell, would sniff again :B
wwaaauuughhhhhhh....... @flightyBroad!!!!!!!!! you have spammed my notifications with love and attention and sweet nice things for the last freaking time!!!!! youre getting got! seriously! im getting you!!!!!! #nsfw #nude #furry #furryartist https://i.imgur.com/bULhrlU.png — https://i.imgur.com/H0NbLhd.png
I AM THE SPECIALEST BOY. THROuGHOuT ALL OF TIME. I WILL NOT BE THWARTED. BY THE LIKES. OF A LuMBERING JACKASS. I HAVE A GuN. AND I AM NOT AFRAID TO uSE IT. AS AN IMPROVISATIONAL. MELEE WEAPON. IF YOu KEEP NEARING.
honestly jade i think he would rather see you use both hands to play with rose rather than use one hand to play with him. he is kind of weird like that, more of a watching guy than a participating guy.
oh! ohhhhh!!!!! :0 i get it now!!! okay okay okay you can stick around, little bald guy. but you have to be nice and keep your bullets inside your gun because they kind of sting bouncing off my magical god fur!
i just never felt the need to i guess! it felt mean or even dangerous... but i have started thinking of and liking the idea of being huge and giving someone a REALLY nice hug or even this whole wonderful world i live in <3
mean??? dangerous?????? youre so silly about this stuff vice jade. youre literally a god with space powers! you can do anything!!! obviously youll be careful but you can still live a little you know?????????
youre so right jade!!!! i was just convincing myself not to do it and worrying over nothing! but now i would like to try it sometime!
hooray!!!!!!! im glad that youre motivated to give this stuff a try now :D :D :D
now squeeze
squeezing with all my might!!!!!!!!!! but she keeps giggling and making squeaky happy noises!!! gosh darn it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! >:B
jeez...... i have like a million bazillion notifications?? i hope nothing bad has happened while i was drawing :( oh well! anyway!!!!! here is @zoosmellPooplad's request for intimate stuffs!!! its also an invitation to come over and do this whenever!! :D :D :D #nsfw #nude #furry #furryartist https://i.imgur.com/5CE8IDe.png
you are sooooo lucky that i dont have the tickliest tummy because my stress response is biting!!! sometimes eating!!!!!!!!!
DID I ASK FOR A HuGE SMELLY HuG. YOu RANCID FuCKING CuNT.
bestestness idea ever today!! and its barely even the start of the day for me basically!? yes yes yes a million times yes. my tail is wagging so hard!!
yayyyyy and rosie agreed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh no. How ever could such a crisis be averted. If only I intended to. Such a tragedy could have been so preventable.
I beg your pardon. I've agreed to nothing of the sort.
fuck yeah!!! one more thing to add to the activity list for our party.
oh no, you ABSOLUTELY agreed. you said it sounds terrific and that it would bring us together!
hehehehehehehehe.... awwwwwww i knew youd need a little bit of fluffy puppylove little guy!!! come here ive got sooo much hug to give :B
one taaaaaall order meat monster for @lazyMerrymaker! i put some veggies on it because john would probably demand it...... i hope it still looks really good!????? https://i.imgur.com/bFcylsn.png
f00dz fuk1n aw3z0m3 t0 draw bud thatz why 1m 1nt0 ztud10 gh1bl1 m0v13z 0k 1tz actually m0r3 f0r th3 ant1-war m3zzag3z 1n 3m but zt1ll
My mouth is physically salivating at the mere sight of this. Uncontrollably.
all done!! im going to post it up in juuuust a moment!!!! stay. tuned. for pumpkin pie pawsomeness............. >:B
:0!!!!!! wowwww!! which one is your favorite one??!
j33z 1 dunn0 1tz k1nda a t13 b3tw33n h0wlz m0v1n caztl3 and p0rc0 r0zz0
i love porco rosso so so sooooo much but my favorite is castle in the sky!!! because sheeta reminds me of me a little bit? is that selfish?? whatever shes awesome!!
nah 1 d0nt th1nk 1tz z3lf1zh caztl3 1n th3 zky 1z gr3at t00 th0 man n0w ur juzt mak1n m3 wanna r3watch th0z3 m0v13z aga1n cuz 1m ztart1n t0 f0rg3t z0m3 0f th3 c0r3 th3m3z 0f z0m3 0f th3m
any excuse is a good excuse to watch and rewatch and rerewatch and rerererererewatch some of the yummiest movies ever!!!!! thats just a fact
w3ll fr1gg1n za1d gurl! B] m1ght ztart 0ff w1th l1k3 p0ny0 0r t0t0r0
doggy kisses for @gardenGamma!!!!!!!! this one is really fun because we dont look like each other at all!! so many jades.... so many ways to be jade.... #requests #nsfw #nude #furry #furryartist https://i.imgur.com/qppANAX.png
that means the whole universe to me!!! i will keep drawing just because you believe in me!! :D :P :D :P thats me licking your face in puppy joy
backs up and puts my front paws down so i can shake my tail in a play position just so you know that im really friendly!!!!!!
<<"i-i'll make sure to take a look then >//<">>
how do you feel about howling and pawing and getting chased by a really happy dog????????
It delights me endlessly the way you are so happy you cannot keep your tongue from lolling out. There will forever be an upper echelon of adorableness unattainable to most. That is where you shall be. Ever eternally entrapped. A veritable Yog Sothoth, the most vital thread of fate in the Dark Tapestry. Outside the conventional universe, time, and space. If one were to peep beyond the final keyhole before the Ultimate Gate...they would likely see you. Changing. From nothing. Into just as plentifully underabundant nothing. But the sight of which would be everything to a lonely soul.
aww.... the idea of some lonely soul being lost in the endless reaches of paradox space without any hugs or attention or puppy snuggles is probably the saddest thing ever......... but thats okay because i will be there. to hug them back to happiness!!!!!
Your hug is summarily accepted. It will be locked beyond the vault of my arms intertwined with yours forevermore. Beware.
awoooooooo!!!! i am wary and im so happy to make you feel better rosie! :D
okay i drew lisa for @dogwoodJackal but i made her a kitty!!! she probably gets distracted by her pearl necklace and baps at it when shes bored...... i totally get it #requests #furry #furryartist https://i.imgur.com/JvaTk04.png
:33 < oh my gosh!!! mewr furry art is so cute!!
this is the best day of my fucking life?? ;-; man it's so embarrassing when my actual mom draws my simpsons shit, so it's cool there's a version out here i CAN ask!
thank mew!! hehehe :B i love drawing furry stuff its basically the best hobby ever
:33 < well!!! they pawre lovely and i like s33ing them :))
gosh i bet its really weird to have a jade for a mom..... does she chase her tail to get tired enough for bed like me??? pfff hehehe. im laughing just thinking about it..... anyway it was really fun to draw this for you! thanks for asking!!!!! :D
lol not that specifically, she has sleep meds for that, but she does do dog stuff sometimes! its fun! 8J
It will forever obliterate me the utterly inescapable allure of the warped and fascinating lens through which you view the world. I long for the Springfield you see. Where Homer's drunken antics are met with slurred mewling and paw swipes, where Bart decries a resoundingly defiant "eat my stripes", and Lisa is the smartest cat in the entire world.
youre right..... i think all tv shows would be a hundred times more pawsome if they had more paws on the steering wheel :D
Yet even still, there is an undeniable charm in the way you furnish their addition with such inspired intensity. I should hate to strangle your muse in pursuit of the vision that would die with her last breath. Ordinary Simpsons has its purpose. Your vision augments and enhances it.