Jake english
@golgothasTerror
Page of hope, selfcest guy, and dubbed "egotistical jackass" by the biggest egotistical jackass i know! Youre either here because ive said something incredibly funny or incredibly NOT funny. Howdy!
My visions been starting to get all blurry even with my glasses on... not too sure what im supposed to do about that given my circumstances. Going to the eye doctor isnt exactly an easy task!
I for one highly appreciate and encourage the influx of jakes posting on the selfcest tag recently. #Selfcest
(Its myself and 2 others but a small victory is still a victory so hush!)
Since its been about an hour heres your mandatory im still lost and wandering aimlessly update. Youd think after all these years this wouldnt be an issue huh!
Good news? Progress has been made. Bad news? I have gone from being only slightly lost to having no clue where i am.
Just how egotistical would i sound if i were to admit that my minds been on another version of myself all morning? #Selfcest
Aint that the truth? Hes much older for starters and we dont exactly share a last name. Probably the most detached from myself that another jake could be if that changes anything. However! I also gravitate towards ones that are eerily similar to myself sometimes.
Im a little lost and i just faceplanted in the mud but otherwise its a nice rainy day out and im thoroughly enjoying myself. Heres where i recommend pocketing your own cellphones and going outside!
Fork found in kitchen. Fish found in ocean. Yet another dirk strider found behaving exactly as expected. It gets even more shocking after the 50th time. Trust me bro.
Im gesturing aggressively to a previous post of mine right now. Cant say im surprised. #Dashwatching
I just ate an entire carton of eggs and now im going to go get busy running around outside in the rain for a while. Good morn!
Okay so the headache is no longer an issue but as a tradeoff im experiencing something thats significantly worse to bear with how physically inclined my daily activities are. So... what might a dude do about not being able to move or touch his arm without a horrid ache in his shoulder? :(
“Go outside” being thrown around all willy nilly as a retort nowadays is great because its completely ineffective when directed at me. You gotta drag me back indoors most of the time!
Instead of taking the advice i was so kindly given earlier i went outside and ran around a bit. 0/10 remedy my brain still feels like its trying to wriggle its way out of my skull only i just so happen to be a bit more muddy now.
I think “striders arent all that” is a pretty solid bit of advice for any and all jakes out there. Especially the ones on this site who run around all hung up on the dude(s?) Theres more to life than dirk strider and its a little heartrending to witness another poor naive english fall victim to the guys nonexistent charm sometimes.
Ha! Funny you say that i was just having this exact conversation with another one of myselves recently! Weve decided its best we jakes strike out on our own path so to speak. Bootstraps pulled up and everything. No more mooning over pointy shades and a personality that would shiver satan himself out of his tighty whiteys.
Right you are bro! I personally believe there are plenty of fish in the sea who happen to be very green in hue and share similar opinions to myself and that tends to be my lane as of late... but that may also be the ego talking.
Im in an eerily similar situation myself these days keeping close company with a fellow who happens to share my exact face and general disposition and its been wildly illuminating. It started off as self discovery and somewhere along the way became something dangerously close to a harem situation. One man wolf pack? Jake stack? Im still workshopping the branding.
Yeesh. Havent had a headache this dreadful in a minute. Does anyone know of any remedies that dont involve either bashing my skull in or hoping aspirin is effective? :( #Violence
cool rag over one's eyes and laying down in a dark room.
Theres nothing quite like the feeling of waking up all hazy and disoriented with a killer headache and not a clue where you are! That being said. Um.
Had a thrilling day of doing absolutely nothing worth anything.
At a certain point this all gets pretty embarrassing doesnt it? #Dashwatching
I yearn for nothing and am actually pretty content with my situation but i wish you all luck probably. #Notyearning
This website makes me feel very nosy sometimes but that might just be because i am. That being said... wow. #Dashwatching