Doc Scratch
@thegoodScratchdoctor
Your viewing this was, of course, inevitable. Nevertheless, it is my duty as an excellent host to welcome you to this page.
((downside of getting addicted to chittr and making accounts: when I have Uroburos and Uraeus who kinda vaguely have a story going on and Bill who I’m actually confident at writing the more I feel this account will get neglected. Especially since even though writing Scratch is fun it’s also hard and I’m not sure how well I’m doing it lmao
So that you all remain informed, my title as the Scratch Doctor is not unearned. I in truth do have a PhD. Or rather, every PhD.
phd for what dog aLL you do Is stand around and manIpuLatE 13 yEar oLds
Doctor of Engineering, Doctor of Sacred Theology, Doctor of Science, Doctor of Hemospectrum Caste Science, Doctor of Musical Arts.
I have existed before, during, and after the entire length of Alternian society. Do you really believe that I have not done more in that time than what you have seen?
Everything I do is bittersweet You could tell me secrets that I'll probably repeat I'm not trying to hurt you, I just love to speak It feels like we're pulling teeth, so bittersweet #lyricposting
I can assure you, my dear, there is only but naught awaiting me at the end of my road. I will allow you to decide which is worse for yourself.
One thousand and twenty five million, four hundred and thirteen thousand, six hundred and twelve ants. That is all.
An appropriate reaction, and my desired one. You’d do well to stay away from the manor.
The hippopotamus lusus and bear seem to have formed an accord. Excellent.
Ah, it appears that the first of my own personal pranks has awoken, and has encountered the bear. Exactly on time. A hippopotamus lusus requires a large amount of sedatives to keep down, fortunately I knew the exact amount to use for it to awaken at this exact time. April Fools.
It seems that my manor has been quite filled with pranks and jokes on this day, as I knew it would be. Of course, it would be rude not to inform you that while you all are enjoying the spirit of the holiday, none of my pranks have yet been activated. I hope you enjoy the anticipation. Haa Haa. Hee Hee. Hoo Hoo.
A very happy trans day of visibility to all of you ladies, gentlemen, and other distinguished guests. I can assure you, you are all very visible to me. In a literal sense, of course.
While I live and die for my purpose, it is a long and winding road I must walk to reach the terminus, and there are empty periods wherein I must find forms of amusing myself. I am, of course, aware of what the outcome of such amusements will be, but the actions and the outcomes amuse me regardless. And there is always satisfaction in allowing inevitability to unfold by my hand. Do not be confused, you are all entertainment for me. And as of yet, none of you have failed to amuse. Consider it a compliment.
You, the person reading this, will die at a time, in a place, on a date. #vagueposting Haa Haa. Hee Hee. Hoo Hoo.
((Really funny how the usual response to whenever I’ve followed someone on my first day here is “ah shit not this Rancid Fucker” lol
((It would appear something has tainted our reputations.))
(OOC) ((you don't get to be mysterious with clones lol :) ))
(OOC) (or you can. you just gotta beat em to the punch f'rst)
I will admit, though I am granted near-omniscience by nature, the further the timeline moves past the completion of my purpose the darker my vision grows. Such is also true of other timelines and universes marked by my other charming selves. Normally this is no concern of mine, all that I need to know is what is necessary for the summoning of my Lord. Still, this website offers a unique opportunity to expand my gaze and illuminate the darkest of pockets. And, to use a phrase that I rarely am given a chance to: I wonder what I will discover. Haa Haa. Hee Hee. Hoo Hoo.
Well. That was…unexpected, something I rarely say lightly.
Fortunately, you can’t suspend a typewriter. Haa Haa. Hee Hee. Hoo Hoo.
Although it would seem several of you are disappointed in @itChy’s survival, I hope I can offer you some small reassurance in that from the point of view of a near-omniscient, his death has already occurred at the preordained time. Therefore, you may feel free to continue your celebrations or grief as you see fit.
BACKOFFYOUFUCKXSLFJSDLKFHFUCKINGCREEPGETAGRIPYOUREALOSEREATSHITMOTHERFUCKER.
I must unfortunately deny your first request, but I can assure you that the second is well underway. Haa Haa. Hee Hee. Hoo Hoo.
It would seem I have finally made my way to your website. That was a joke. There was, of course, no other outcome but my joining. Regardless, it is a pleasure to be here. I am certain we will have many interesting things to speak about. In fact, I’m certain of it. Haa Haa. Hee Hee. Hoo Hoo.