dave
@turntekGodhead
earth c 23 and full of shit
tampering with the sanctity of the improv rap genre by sneakily counting anything written while drinking coca cole freestyle as straight off the dome piece
i mean come on lets not grab several pounds of splinter supply and shove it all over the place for no good reason #wasteof #time
whoever decided mulch needed to be one more mundane and pointless thing for homeowners to take on especially after surviving a game so mindfucky and grueling needs kicked in the nuts as hard as possible
yknow sometimes when people join this app they make an intro post and yknow more often than not it can be read w the im blue eiffel 65 introduction cadence
yo listen up heres a story about a little guy that lives in a blue world
posting #newtattoo to seem sexy and appealing and its just a fish with long long legs that go all the way up
why is it more upsetting to lose at mario kart than it is to lose a job
literally crawling in my own skin over some bozo baby peach cpu and yet you could tell me im fired and the most id muster is a shrug and an “eh”
well thats one way to find out im horrifically allergic to the active ingredient in awesome sauce
rebuilding my reputation brick by brick but the mortar is toothpaste and there isnt nearly enough anti cavity magic in the new and improved formula
the back alley shenanigans are occurring the first one to find me gets a billion bucks
i used to be a real piece of shit emphasis on the used to if you see any daves with their hair slicked back (not pushed back) just know theyre probably not this far in their douche recovery arc and may need a little more time thats all
cOmE on man yOU know yOU cant rEsIst the call of a gOOd sloppy stEAk
i will have enough wares in my trenchcoat for at least two or three people or does that make the demand too high damn idk ill just have stuff youll like it and ill discourage you from coming to get it #inmyownworld #math #economics
#iwantcandy but not that thing im trying to sink my teeth into the most elusive corner i can find at #eridanweek and perform trenchcoat transactions and cup ball games i hide and throw down some sick shade and you find me for the reward of my performance but i guess now that im typing it out im wondering why would i make it a mission to get found by a shit ton of jujud up jackrabbits as if hide and go seek would actually be thrilling w these people… maybe i will maybe i wont regardless i will be rolling in shit to get everyone off my trail #notreally #obviously :/ #smellsgreat
i will say some of you are debbying down more than usual and its really decimating the vibe of #eridanweek
dont make me get unfunny about it dont make me reference the old text https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/7740ec73b240.jpeg
i usually go against the current salmon style but im ngl currently #oilingup to #bigfata$$ and letting the stream take me https://youtu.be/6ssqofk_0z0?si=w5yrvzg3qqgcoksq
ol bump in the road is at it again https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/b06867e62b7f.jpeg
@twinarmaggetfucked is #hatingonit
the daunting task of mowing my stupid lawn is getting in between me and any z i hoped to catch thank god for earth c domestica lifestyle privileges or whatever but yardwork is a heavy cross to bear my hams and yams are begging for mercy
i am mincing my words rn just absolutely slicing and dicing the fuck out of them
my trampoline has been hijacked since i got here #notbouncingonit
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for lik£, a worthy caus£. W£ can lik£ still fight if you want
roxy i promise i mourned internally for an eternity before hitting post ok a guy can only sit in sorrow for so long before ruminating on everything else hes missed out on