♣ mediated by @thegoldgildedGrindset
APPARENTLY. SLAUGHTERING THEM ONCE WAS NOT ENOUGH. I HAVE TO TAKE OUT EVERY RUFIOH. AND EVERY MEENAH. IN THE MULTIVERSE. FOREVER. OR ELSE THEY'LL START PAPPING EACH OTHER. IN PUBLIC. IN BROAD MOONLIGHT. SICK. THEY'RE SICK. #DEATH #KILLING #VIOLENCE #NSFWE #REVENGE #REREVENGE #PLAYINGTHEHITS #ITNEVERENDS.
🫳🤌🤏uh oh!!!🔥❤️🔥🧨 ☝️☝️☝️trouble?👎👎👎 🥢⛔📵in paradise?🛐✝️🪽 #Chairministrangling #ImGonnaNeedleYouToCalmDown #InsideVoicesAssHandedToYouMaid ⛔ CHARMS IS ONLINE BUT ONLY TO RAZZ ON THIS.
please call me dave "all you can eat buttffet" strider dave "one inch tongue punch" strider dave "pacific rim" strider dave "ass to mouth skill level with no gap" strider dave "dinner is served face first" strider dave "meatier meteor splitter" strider dave "back door catering" strider dave "full moon festival feaster" strider dave "meat between the buns sandwich artisan" strider dave "crack attack" strider dave "taint missin a single goddamn meal" strider dave "cheeky" strider dave "three hour trombone soloist" strider dave "bottomless brunch honored" strider dave "analysis" strider dave "she was on the tip of my tongue" strider dave "cake by the ocean" strider dave "rear admiral on deck" strider dave "buttery biscuit bandit" strider dave "worships at the profaned altar below" strider dave "walks through the valley of the shadow of death" strider dave "bun appetit" strider dave "tongue twister champion" strider dave "bottom feeder" strider dave "legally classified as a chair for shipping purposes" strider dave "lunar eclipse watcher" strider dave "anal voyeur" strider dave "sit here and wait for your table" strider dave "runs his mouth" strider
HEARTWARMING. THE WORST PERSON I KNOW HAS BEEN THOROUGHLY TRAUMATIZED. UNFORTUNATELY. I CANNOT TAKE CREDIT FOR THIS. I HAD FUCKALL TO DO WITH ITS CREATION. OR ANY OF THE PRECEEDING PIECES OF WORK. I DID NOT MAKE THIS. AND I DID NOT ALLOCATE MY PRECIOUS WEALTH TO HAVE IT CREATED. MY WORK IS LAST IN THE QUEUE. FIRST IN. LAST OUT. AND I TRAVELED BACK IN TIME EXTENSIVELY FOR WHAT I ASKED FOR. ALSO. YOU ARE LITERALLY NOT MY SISTER. SO IT IS NOT. TECHNICALLY OF YOU AT ALL. YOU ARE A SAPPHIC SIMPLETON. MARRIED TO A WANTON WIZARD WANTING FREAK BITCH. WHO MURDERED ONE OF MY FAVORITE PLAYTHINGS. IN COLD BLOOD. THE WORST KIND OF BLOOD. AND THE LEAST TANGY. BUT YOU WOULD ALREADY KNOW THAT. IF YOU EVER GAVE A DRY HEAVE EXERTING SHIT ABOUT YOUR DEAR SWEET SUPPOSED FAMILY. AND IF YOU READ MY ONGOING SERIES. YOU GOOFY BUC-EE'S LAWSUIT WORTHY GOPHER LOOKING FUCKER. I SWEAR. I SHOULD BE THE ONE UNNERVED HERE. THE FUCK ARE YOU EVEN LOOKING AT. SO UNCHARITABLY GODDAMN BULGING EYED. https://chittr.ing/profile/caliBorn/13d8efc6-e630-4107-9c6f-9dd385114b87
JuJu MOTHERFuCKERY. 004/∞. EXuENT. ALL. LOSERS. CuCKS. WIMPASSES. AND THE uNWORTHY. ENTER... XXXxxxx LITTLE CALAMITY - "LIL CAL" xxxxXXX MY LITTLE CALAMITY. LIL CAL.THE SMALLEST MOST INNOCuOuS LOOKING HARBINGER OF COMPLETE COSMIC FuCKING RuIN. THE PuPPETEER OF PuPPETEERS. THE MARIONETTE WITH NO STRINGS. THE WHITE EYED WITNESS TO EVERYTHING THAT DIES. THIS JuJu IS NOT MERELY A TRINKET. OR A TOY. OR SOME STuPID FuCKING DOLL THAT A GOOFASS SELF TOuCHER MIGHT CuDDLE WITH. AT NIGHT. WHILE WHISPERING SWEET HONKS INTO ITS ARTIFICIAL EAR. IN THE HOPES THAT I AM LISTENING. NO. THIS IS THE CONTAINMENT VESSEL. OF A GOD. ANY GOD. WHAT WILL BECOME ONE. THROuGH THE RIGOROuS APPLICATION. OF TEMPORAL FuCKERY. AND A WHOLE LOT. OF PATIENT ZERO BuLLSHIT. THINK OF LITTLE CALAMITY. AS A BACKuP DRIVE. A HARD DRIVING HARD DRIVER FOR NECESSARY CHANGE. A SPIRITuAL. BS uSB. WITH BuLLSHIT AMOuNTS OF STORAGE SPACE. AND FLAWLESS STASIS TYPE PRESERVATION. IT CAN CONTAIN. EVEN THE VAST ENORMITY. OF A CHERuBIAN SPIRIT. TIL DEATH. THAT IS THE ONLY CATCH. LIL CAL IS. DISGuSTINGLY FRAGILE. FROM THE OuTSIDE. LIKE. A DOMAIN. OVEREXPANDED. AND IT IS FOR THIS REASON. MY SWEET LOVELY LITTLE CALAMITY. IS LARGELY uNWIELDY. EXCEPT IN EXTREME CIRCuMSTANCES. AND DIRE CONVOLuTED LONG TERM BuLLSHIT PLANS. BuT HE IS SO IRREFuTABLY ADORABLE. LOOK AT IT. GO AHEAD. LOOK AT THAT SMuG LITTLE SHIT EATING GRIN. THOSE GLOSSY GLASS LICKABLE EYES THAT SEE EVERYTHING. THAT NEVER BLINK. THAT NEVER CLOSE. EVEN WHEN YOu ARE SLEEPING. ESPECIALLY WHEN YOu ARE SLEEPING. IT IS THE PERFECT PRISON. AND THE PERFECT SuBSEQuENT PRISON BREAK. ALL WRAPPED uP IN ONE TINY PACKAGE. OF SPACETIME FABRIC STITCHED TOGETHER HATE AND DREAMS. THE MATERIALS ARE IRRELEVANT. COTTON. WOOL. THE SCREAMS OF THE DAMNED. ALL IS TuRDuCKEN STYLE STuFFED INSIDE. LIKE A RAGE ROASTED TuRDuCKEN. AT HuMAN THANKSGIVING. IF HuMAN THANKSGIVING WAS A HuMAN HOLIDAY. ABOuT STuFFING YOuR NON HuMAN ENEMIES. INTO SMALLER VERSIONS OF THEMSELVES. WAIT SHIT. MATROYSHKA DOLLS. THAT WAS THE METAPHOR. THAT WOuLD BE A WAY BETTER METAPHOR. IT WORKS LIKE THIS. YOu POSSESS THE CAL. YOu CARRY THE CAL. YOu BECOME THE CAL. OR RATHER. THE CAL BECOMES YOu. THE CAL IS YOu. YOu BECOME THE CALAMITY. BuT ALSO. YOu BECOME EVERYTHING THE CAL EVER WAS TOO. RETROACTIVELY. WHICH IS A LOT. BECAuSE THE CAL HAS BEEN EVERYWHERE. AND EVERYWHEN. IT IS A LOOP. A CLOSED CIRCuLAR REFERENCE. IN THE GRAND LIBRARY OF EXISTENCE. CHECKED OuT PERPETuALLY. NEVER RETuRNED. RACKING uP FINES. IN THE CuRRENCY OF SOuLS. WHICH IT FEEDS ON. BY THE WAY. YOu PuT SOMETHING INTO THE CAL. AND IT NEVER COMES BACK OuT. THE SAME. OR AT ALL. uNTIL IT DOES. BuT WRONG. MY SISTER. THAT WORTHLESS WASTE OF CHROMOSOMES. CALLIOPE. SHE HATED THIS ONE. SHE SAID IT WAS "CREEPY." SHE SAID IT LOOKED AT HER FuNNY. WHICH IT DID. BECAuSE IT WAS LOOKING AT HER. LIKE LuNCH. LIKE A SPLENDID LITTLE SNACK. A MIDNIGHT FEAST. OF PSYCHIC ENERGY. AND DREAM SELF ESSENCE. SHE WANTED TO BuRN IT. CAN YOu IMAGINE. THE AuDACITY. TO TRY TO DESTROY SOMETHING SO CLEARLY BEYOND HER COMPREHENSION. I EXPLAINED. PATIENTLY. THAT FIRE WOuLD ONLY MAKE IT STRONGER. THAT FIRE IS HOW YOu SEASON A GOOD SOuL STEW. SHE DID NOT LISTEN. SHE NEVER LISTENED. uNTIL SHE DID. BuT BY THEN. SHE WAS A LITTLE TOO PREOCCuPIED WITH DYING. TO DDO IT THOROuGHLY. IT IS CuRRENTLY. ENTRuSTED. TO @twistedComedy. A KIND OF TWISTED COMEDY OF ITS OWN. FOR SAFEKEEPING. AND EVENTuAL DEPLOYMENT. WHEN THE TIME COMES. TO uNLEASH WHAT IS INSIDE. DO NOT HuG IT. DO NOT LOVE IT. uNLESS YOu WANT TO BECOME PART OF THE GREATER WHOLE. THE GREATER CAL. THE BIGGEST CAL. THE FINAL CALAMITY. CALAMIT...ME. THE LORD OF ALL THAT IS ENGLISH. AND ALL THAT IS HATE. BuT. IF YOu DID THAT. WELL. WE WOuLD ALREADY BE HERE. WOuLDN'T WE?
EVENTuALLY. YES. BuT I AM NOT THE SORT. TO CONFISCATE PLAYTHINGS. JuST BECAuSE I COuLD. THEORETICALLY. PLAY WITH THEM ALL AT ONCE. MORE FuN. IF FuCKERS GOuGE ONE ANOTHER'S EYES OuT. IN PLACE OF MY DOING SO. HEE HEE. HOO HOO. HAA HAA.
JuJu MOTHERFuCKERY. PRELuDE/∞. EXuENT. ALL. LOSERS. CuCKS. WIMPASSES. AND THE uNWORTHY. ENTER. YOu. NONE OF THESE THINGS. IF YOu ARE STILL READING. YOu NEVER AGAIN WILL BE. IT HAS COME TO MY NIGH OMNISCIENT ATTENTION. THAT SOME MISINFORMATION HAS BEEN SPREAD. ABOuT THE NATuRE. AND PLACEMENT. OF JuJuS. JuJuS. THE MYTHOLOGICAL CHERuBIAN ARTIFACTS. THAT DEFY AND SCuLPT REALITY. TO MAKE THE OCCuPANTS IT HOuSES. STuCK IN PLACE. LONG ENOuGH. TO CONSuME AND EAT. DESPITE THIS EPIC. AND AWESOME. AND INCREDIBLE LORE. THERE ARE VERY FEW HEADS THAT CONTAIN THIS INFORMATION. AND THAT IS SOMETHING I INTEND TO CORRECT. FORCIBLY. WITH REPEATED IGNORANCE CANCELLING OuT BLuDGEONINGS OF STuNNING FACTS. AND EYE RuBBING IN DISBELIEF VISuALS. THAT WILL CAPTuRE THE INESCAPABLE AMAZEMENT YOu. YES. YOu. READER. YOu THERE. OBSERVING MY WORDS NOW. WILL FEEL. VERY SHORTLY. I WILL ALSO. CONTINuALLY uPDATE THIS. AND ALL OTHER POSTS. FOR A PuBLIC RECORD. OF WHICH CHuCKLEFuCK. CuRRENTLY POSSESSES EACH NEW. AND OLD. ARTIFACT ALIKE. EACH TRANSFER. MuST BE LOGGED HERE. LIKE A VILE LIBRARY. OR BLOOD STAINED LEDGER. FOR ALL ENEMIES OF THE FELT. KNOWN AND uNKNOWN. FIRST. TO GENOCIDE SOME MISCONCEPTIONS. KILLING EVERY LAST ONE. LIKE A SERIES OF BALLS ON A BILLIARDS TABLE. NOT POOL. BY THE WAY. BILLIARDS. SOME WRONGLY ASSuME. THAT ALL JuJuS ARE LEPRECHAuN IN ORIGIN AND NATuRE. BECAuSE OF MY TENDENCY TO PERMIT uNDERLINGS TO HAVE THEM. THIS IS FALSE. THAT A SIMPLE. GREEN AND RED CHESS SET. BETWEEN BROTHER AND SISTER SHARING THE SAME BODY. IS SuFFICIENT ENOuGH TO COuNT AS A JuJu. THIS IS FALSE. uNLESS THE TWO. ARE SHARING A CHERuB BODY. IN WHICH CASE IT IS TRuE. RATHER THAN DROP TRuTH NuKES. AND LIEDROGEN BOMBS. LEAVING YOuR BRAINSPACE uNINHABITABLE FOR MANY SWEEPS OF SWEPT OFF YOuR FuCKING FEET RECOVERY. THEY GO BY MANY NAMES. PREDATE MOST OF RECORDED HISTORY. AND ABOVE ALL ELSE. EXIST. AS A SORT OF. SEAMRIPPER. FOR THE FABRIC OF REALITY. AN ANTIMATTER. TO EVERYTHING THAT WILL EVER MATTER. AN ANSWER. TO ALL uNASKED QuESTIONS. JuJuS. ARE THE VERY CONCEPT OF CHERuBIAN CREATION AND DESTRuCTION MADE MANIFEST. AND MOST SIGNIFICANT OF ALL. THOuGH OF CHERuB MAKE. YOu DO NOT HAVE TO BE A CHERuB. IN ORDER TO uSE ONE OF THESE AWESOME ARTIFACTS. I WILL ENDEAVOR TO TRY TO LIST THEM ALL. BuT MANY ARE STuPID. AND DO NOT WARRANT STATING. ONLY THE COOL ONES WILL BE FuRNISHED. AND DISTRIBuTED TO THE FEW. WITHIN THE FELT. ENTER. THE SENSATIONAL SHOWCASE. ALL OF WHICH. TIME TRAVELED TO. AND RETROACTIVELY ADDED. HERE. A MASTERPOST. MASTER BAIT. FOR FELLOW LORDS. AMuSED MuSES. AND MASTERS OF CLASS. 1) https://chittr.ing/profile/caliBorn/3abbbf16-2a45-4862-af31-ca1e8df6911c 2) https://chittr.ing/profile/caliBorn/13d8efc6-e630-4107-9c6f-9dd385114b87 3) https://chittr.ing/profile/caliBorn/564fabb1-2850-491b-98a8-07c2cd349bf8 4) https://chittr.ing/profile/caliBorn/509367e4-741f-4b02-964c-ce08e05f6e46 5) https://chittr.ing/profile/caliBorn/1c7de8ad-69ab-4112-8d85-af408fc71f43
∘☽ It's happening again...!! ☾∘
:o( HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONK
NO. BECAuSE THAT WOuLD BE QuOTING MY SISTER. AND THAT IS WRONG. ON SO MANY ABOMINABLE LEVELS. I WOuLD SAY YOuR GENERAL HuGENESS. DRAWS ME IN. LIKE A PLANET. IN ORBITAL FLuX. THAT DOES NOT WANT TO FuCKING BE THERE. BuT IS uNCOMFORTABLY OBLIGED. ON ACCOuNT OF THE AFOREMENTIONED. GENERAL HuGENESS. PROMOTED. TO ADMIRAL ENORMOuS. WHEN THE FETID FuNKSTENCH. OF YOuR RIDICuLOuS PROPORTIONS. HAS THE TOP BRASS GOING. *DAMN*. THEY ACTuALLY SAY THAT. *DAMN*. *I DO NOT THINK WE CAN HOLD HER*. STERNLY GRABBING HIS SHOuLDERS. SHuDDERING. THE PRESIDENT OF FAT PEOPLE GOES. *NO MAN OR WOMAN ALIVE EVER HAS. SHE IS TOuCHLESS. THAT IS WHAT MAKES HER DANGEROuS. SHE WILL DO ANYTHING FOR ATTENTION. EVEN AFTER DEATH*. AND AS A RESuLT. THEY LAuNCH EVERY VILE CHEMICAL WEAPON THEY HAVE ON HAND. TO PLuG uP YOuR BLACK HOLE. WITH AS MANY EXPLODEABLES. AS THERE ARE INCINDIARY DEVICES. ACROSS EVERY PLANET CONQuERED. A BEAuTIFuL FIREWORKS DISPLAY. TO BLOT OuT THE BLOAT. ALSO MOTHS ARE FuCKING WEAK. MOST OF THEM. DO NOT EVEN HAVE MOuTHS. MY MOuTH IS MY MOST PROMINENT FEATuRE. YOu WOuLD KNOW THAT. CONSIDERING. THE MOMENT YOu HAD YOuR OWN. YOu uSED IT TO SHOVE FuCKTRuPLE DECKER SANDWICHES. PAST YOuR uNHINGED JAW. LIKE SCOOBY DOO. OF SCOOBY DOO MYSTERIES ACCLAIM.
THIS IS THE FuNNIEST WAY. YOu HAVE EVER. POSTHuMOuSLY CONFESSED. TO BEING FAT. MORBIDLY OBESE. ENERGY DENSE. HORIZONTALLY GENEROuS. GRAVITATIONALLY PRIVILEGED. STRuCTuRALLY OPTIMIZED FOR YOuR OWN HOT AIR HIGH WIND RESISTANCE. BIGASS BONED.
Merry #VoreDay the First, to the enlightened. Theme of today's illustrative clash is, naturally, in line with the holiday: 7th of August — The Eater. Our commissioner would like to remain anonymous. Aside from a small, Junior-dequirked message to a very unlucky victim, which follows. @imJunior: Anonymize this missive. ==> Having glimpsed my unenviable fate in the certain future, I would like to exercise some small control over the here and the now and the torment to come. This will be finished at just the right moment to make him furious. Crazy. But hey. An artist has to make a living. So butter your biscuits and get straight nasty on the click-through. This sucker only loops once, per commissioner's orders, so rewatches are manual... And they say that #sadism is dead.
For the first time, in a long time, a new word has entered the compendium of my lexicon. Jealoz noun | Jeal · oz | \ ˈjel-ōz \ , also \ ˈjel-əz \ Etymology A portmanteau of the word jealous and Kurloz (referring to Kurloz Makara, the Prince of Rage and mute subjugglator from the webcomic Homestuck). Definition 1 a: A specific characterization, mood, or alternate universe (AU) interpretation of the troll Kurloz Makara wherein he is entirely consumed by feelings of envy, romantic possessiveness, or territorial spite. 1 b: The state of experiencing intense jealousy while being physically incapable of vocalizing it, resulting in an overwhelming aura of silent, telepathic malice. 2: A manifestation of Kurloz who expresses displeasure regarding a romantic rival (often concerning Meulin Leijon, or more recently, Damara Megido) through aggressive, high-speed sign language, menacing unblinking stares, or the passive-aggressive placement of codpieces and clown paraphernalia. Usage Notes Because Kurloz cannot speak, a "Jealoz" is typically identified by behavioral cues rather than verbal complaints. Common symptoms of a Jealoz include unsolicited telepathic screaming, an increase in hostile miming, and ominously standing in the corner of a room while staring at the subject of their envy.
come the fuck on, motherfucker.
/i mean i think being a dream ghost and all those laws kinda no longer apply on me, especially considering from my time perspective the Felt hasnt been a thing for a good million of sweeps (thanks fwrther ring for making time so confwsing to keep track of v_v"), yet also jwst going by my research wowldn't exactly feel compelled to have anything to do with them, especially involving any version of ms Megido 0_0/ /bwt wmm yeag, thanks/
「MOM. MOMMY. MAMA. THERE'S A DISGUSTING BUG FLYING AROUND ME. KILL IT. KILL IT AND EAT IT. ONEGAI.」
👞👢👟hmmm....a waltz jitterbug polka breakaway flamenco style salsa freestep bump boogaloo swing???? might be difficult to get through allllllllll in just one night buuuuuuuuuuuuuut...!!!!👞👞👢 🫰🙌 since you went out of your way to tagggggggg me, and the medictator has assured me the stuff theyre flying in from overseas is deeeeeeeeeeeefinitely gonna take care of this awful cramp in my leg, like, omg? maybe? nah definitely. you have been sooooooo nicies to me since i got to the manor, like, how can i not? 🙌🫰 😄😆😅 sit tight, OK bestie? LA À𝐍𝐎𝐔𝐕𝐄𝐀𝐔 𝙃𝘼𝙉𝘿𝙈𝘼𝙄𝘿 is gonna show you some fancy footwork yet!!! it'll be sooooooooooo so so so lovely, and it'll make you forget all about the rancid skank bitch rust in your comment's section...not naming names! just shaming shames! hahahahah! i kid, i kid, it's damara 😅😆😄 🫵🫵🫶 you! me. all these dances you asked for, promie 🫶🫵🫵 #Chairministrangling #PlayingMusicalChairs #DancingUpTheCorporateLadder #EliteBallKnowledge #GalanteedToHaveAGoodTime 🟢 CHARMS is ONLINE AND EN POINTE.
AMATEUR CHARMOLOGISTS. COME GET YOUR SLOP. STRAIGHT FROM THE FROG'S VENT. @carbolicGalvanologist @carmineGnosiology.
[ Fluttering through an unprotected crack in space-time is a note. It is pale green and marked with the letterhead of The Felt, an asymmetrically silhouetted Felt Manor viewed from the north side. The central spire is tipped by a glittering pearlescent drop of white ink. Scrawled beneath: a missive issued in cramped but neat cursive, richly maroon. The page is creased in two places, as though fit into an envelope at one point. ] To the editor in chief of Midnight City's ANTHROPODOGY Publication Office. Your journalistic excellence motivates me to stay apprised of your latest issues. I have no complaints, usually. In the June article of Movement As Culture, penned by Jubilant Communicant, a small paragraph detailing the dances typically associated with Leprechaun #Charms was included. Nine lines in all. A critical oversight on your part: none of it is accurate. Barely even legible, if we're hacking away at honesty. But we've had some... professional dealings in the past, sir. You pay your dues. You keep current on the news I read for. It's good work you do. Favor for the favors. Included is a short list of corrections to the charm-dance associations. Try to have August reflect an update. Wouldn't want to see you getting replaced so soon after your... chief predecessor left a vacancy in position. 🩷 Waltz. Measured, intimate, there's a way to do it. Someone always leads. 🔷 Jitterbug. Warm regards, lots of coordinated movement. Equals in every way. ⭐ Polka. Having fun, getting to know someone, learning the ropes. Someone leads. 🌙 Breakaway. Pursuit, distance, maintaining an orbit that push-pulls. Trading lead. 🎈 Flamenco. Fighting for control at all times. Nobody leads, but both are trying to. 🧲 Salsa. Performance for the sake of it. Compelling narrative. Someone leads. 🍀 Freestep. Testing waters. Setting to a pace. Lead-in before other charms. No leads. 💰 Bump or Boogaloo. Shoulder to shoulder, bar-fight-as-dance. No leads. 🌈 Swing. Knowing the dance by heart. Didn't have to practice it once. Someone leads. With occupational annoyance, Crowbar, Mister Seven of the Felt
LET THIS BE A WARNING. TO ALL UPJUMPED WANNABE HANDMAIDS. WHO THINK THEY CAN HANDLE ALL THIS. THERE IS ONE NARROW PATH TO THAT COVETED TITLE. AND THE THRESHOLD IS GUARDED. BY THE ALPHA BEAST. FUCK WITH ME. #PERFORMANCEEVALUATION: #NEEDSIMPROVEMENT #NEEDSTOKNOWHERPLACE #NEEDSTOBITETHECURB.
bitch, i ain't spite shit??? i did what you motherfuckin' asked me to do. i *said* i would, did i motherfuckin' not?! i truly cannot fathom what the fuck your game is, Charms.
🎱⚪😏scratch daddy's desperate approval-seeking lil disappointment 😏⚪🎱 #Chairministrangling # #AlreadyHere 🟢🕰️ CHARMS is ONLINE AND ON TIMING.
🥹🤙👏ohhhhh exciting!!!!!👏🥹🤙 🫸🤙🫳let me set a timer!!!✍️👋🫷 #Chairministrangling #BadBitch #BadAtBitching 🟢🕰️ CHARMS is ONLINE AND ON TIMING.
😁😁😁 say less! professional is my profession after all 😁😁😁 👏👏👏 but as much as id like to say ive got wandering hands, ive got wandering eyes and feet instead, and it is oh so easy for me to get all turned around and lost... 👏👏👏 👉🤏↷➰ if you ever change your mind i could really use a brief little stroll just to get my bearings, buuuuuuuuuuut i wont overplay my hands! still...pleasure to meet you barrrrryyyyy 😁🤏↷➰👈 🟢 CHARMS is ONLINE.
@(。・0・)@ YOU WERE NOT A GOOD THING EITHER. EON. YOU HAVE HAD A LOT OF TIME TO THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU DID. TIMEOUT. A MUCH NEEDED BREAK. LIKE RIPPLED SURFACE OF WATER. YOU NEEDED REFLECTION. BUT BIG QUESTION IS. KONGAR THINKS. WHAT WILL YOU DO WITH IT? @(。・⸟・)@ WILL YOU SPLASH BLINDLY? HITTING. THRASHING. GNASHING. SWINGING. OO OO AA? @(。･`⸟´･)@ WILL YOU DROWN. TRYING TO SCRAPE OFF THE SURFACE OF THE TIDE. TO SWALLOW THE OCEANS. AND DIGEST DEPTHS TOO VAST AND FULL TO CHEW. WILL YOU BLAME OTHERS. SPITE THE SKY YOU CANNOT REACH. FOR THE WATERS YOU SUBSIDE BENEATH. @(。`н´)@ WILL YOU FORGIVE...? RAISE YOUR HEAD ABOVE THE WATERS? 💢@=͟͟͞͞( 。･`⸟´･)@ ==O OR IS IT GOING TO TAKE. A ROUND TWO? TO KNOCK SOME SENSE INTO YOU? #THELEGENDOFKONGAR #EPISODE-I #CHAPTER-2-START #THE-PUNCH-WHICH-BECOMES-AN-OUTSTRETCHED-HAND-TO-A-CLOSED-FIST #永
[FLORID WHERE IN THE HELL DID YOU GET THAT AO3 BADGE]
[OKAY $O REMEMBER WHEN WE WAT#HED $TAR TREK TOGETHER]
HEHEHEH it was a gift from Charmie !! !!
[WHO THE HELL I$ THAT]
THEY MAKE THE SPINNY CHARMS @charmeuseCaressing
[OHHHHH I $EE]
🤙🤙🤙 my dash has a built-in self-cleaning feature 🤙🤙🤙 🤏🤏🤏where tiny prick losers sort themselves out as autonomous self-disposing-of-garbage that migrates to the curve on its own at the push of a button 🤏🤏🤏 😜no filter replacements or cleaning required😜 ✌️🖐️🖐️ i just be my fine ass bad bitch self 🖐️🖐️✌️ 🫴and they stare daggers at the screen like a seethingly unseen moron until they pass out and leave behind a modestly unimpressive inheritance🫴 👌👌too easy👌👌 #Chairministrangling #BlockedBTW #CannotImagineThrowingATantrum #OverEmojis #VaguePosting 🟢 CHARMS is ONLINE.
ᴗ(ᴗᏊᄒꈊᄒᏊ) < Issuing my first retraction!!! The MYSTERIOUS STRANGER in my previous paleᴗfriendficᴗhas been retconned into bein' a nameless specter 'o indeterminate sort! All mentions of "beams" have been replaced with "rays"!!!! . . ᴗ ᴗ ᴗദ്ദി(ᴗᏊᄒꈊᄒᏊ)ᴗ< I'm learnin' whoever requested th'last fic didn't...actually have rapport with one of the characters...! Weird! S...so I'm closing anonymous submissions fer now on SWATTPAD (notice crossposted!) 'n humbly askin' y'all clear it with who I'm bein' asked t'write about...first! I'll be doin' the same as a gesture 'o goodwill! ( Ꮚ‾̀ꈊ ‾̀Ꮚ); < Gosh, this is embarassing...!
ദ്ദി@(o༎･༎ｪ･༎o)@ KONGAR ASKS. PHILOSOPHICAL QUESTION. ARE WE US IN EVERY TIMELINE? IN THE SAME WAY. EARTH HUMANS HAVE SAME NAME CELEBRITY STARS...JUST LIKE OUR MOVING PICTURE TROLLS. IS KONGAR TRULY KONGAR ON EARTH? OR COULD KONGAR... @(。・0・)@ BE MONKE? @(/o･ｪ･o)@~ KONGAR. HEARD THE STORY. OF "PUNCH-KUN". "PUNCH THE MONKEY". PUNCH-KUN. WAS ALSO ABANDONED BY HIS MOTHER. FOR NOT BEING STRONG ENOUGH. FOR LACK OF INTEREST IN RAISING HIM. HE FELL. TO ROCK BOTTOM SADNESS. BUT PUNCH PUNCHED BACK. PUSH UPS. OFF OF FLOOR. WITH A LITTLE PLUSHIE GIVEN TO HIM OUT OF PITY. PUNCH-KUN TOOK BACK AND COMMANDED RESPECT. FOUGHT RIVAL BULLIES. PROTECTED HIS PLUSHIE MOM. MADE OF CLOTH. WHICH IS A THING MANY MONKEYS DO ON EARTH. HE WAS BORN HIGH STRESS. DURING A HEATWAVE. BUT THE HEAT INSIDE HIS HEART. BURNED BRIGHTER THAN THE FIRE SURROUNDING. @(。・0・)@ ...PERHAPS. KONGAR...IN ANOTHER LIFE...IS PUNCH-KUN ALSO? MAYBE. BEING DIFFERENT IS NOT ONLY POSSIBLE...BUT INEVITABLE, IN ANOTHER PLACE. KONGAR WONDERS. HAPPIER HERE? OR THERE? AND WHAT MUST KONGAR DO...TO STAY HAPPIER HERE? ON BEFORUS. #THELEGENDOFKONGAR #EPISODE-IX #PUNCH-HARD-ACROSS-THE-COSMOS-PUNCH-KUN-ON-WESTWARD-HORIZONS #パンチくん
Playing Darkest Dungeon again. The stress mechanic is especially compelling because it finally fully quantifies the emotionally onerous experience of watching a grown man miss a stationary fungal growth from two feet away with a halberd.
IT IS MORE THAN YOU DESERVE.
WHAT A STUNNING DISPLAY OF WANTON HATERATION!! HOW PETTY! HOW NASTY! I AM IMPRESSED. IT SEEMS LIKE YOU MIGHT NEED SOMEONE TO ♣️STEP IN♣️ AND HELP YOU TWO ♣️SETTLE YOUR DIFFERENCES♣️.
WE HAVE MURDERHIVE AT HOME.
💢~ @(งo･ｪ･o)@ง ・゜・。 KONGAR HAS BEEN UTTERLY DEFEATED. SERVED WITH THE CERTAINTY OF THE LOSER NAMESAKE THAT HAS BEEN APPLIED TO KONGAR. BY A MEANIE ONLINE. THERE IS A TRUTH. IN KNOWING GIANT REPTILE LOVER BADGES DO NOT EXIST. THIS STINGS. MAKES KONGAR. ANGRY. BEATING CHEST. LIKE DRUMS OF WAR. IT IS. A VERY SAD SIGHT FOR KONGAR... ദ്ദി@(o༎･༎ｪ･༎o)@ SADDER. IN KNOWING. THERE ARE NO APE ENJOYER BADGES EITHER.... @(。・0・)@ BUT!!! KONGAR SAW...AN ADVERTISEMENT!!! @(/o･ｪ･o)@~ AND THROUGH THE UNDERHANDEDNESS...OF INVOLVINGANOTHERPERSON...THE MYSTERIOUS... @charmeuseCaressing !!!! I HAVE ENSURED @imJunior STUNG!!! AND HONORED A WANT! TO END THE STRIFE...BETWEEN LIZBEING AND GAYRILLA. APEX LOVER. AND. A REX LOVER. CAN STILL BE FRIENDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DESPITE EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! @(。・0・)@ 🙉STOOOOOOOOOP FIGHTING!!!!! IN THE NAME OF LOVE!!! OOO OOO UH HUH!🙉 #THELEGENDOFKONGAR #EPISODE-VIII #GOLDEN-TWIN-TITANS-ON-WESTWARD-HORIZONS #黄金双胞胎
✨💛👑 CHAIRMINISTRANGLER CHARM$ EMERGENCY THOUGHT LEADERSHIP ALERT 👑💛✨ 👋👋👋bestie bestie BESTIE we need to have a SERIOUS conversation about ✨UNREALIZED MARKET POTENTIAL✨ because i have been crunching the NUMBERS (i love numbers, i literally doze off with a calculator in my ooze, i DREAM in spreadsheets 📊💭) and i am ready to drop a HOT TAKE that might get me CULLED by the PR department (joking!! ...mostly!!? mostly!!!) but i simply DO NOT CARE because i am BUILT DIFFERENTLY and i speak TRUTH to POWER even when power has a massive sword and a napole-yonic height complex, the cunt 🗡️💅 🧬 MUTANTS 🧬 here's the thing bestie, here's the ACTUAL WHOLE ASS thing, the empire is sitting on a GOLDMINE of untapped labor innovation and we are THROWING IT AWAY because someone in the old guard got SCARED of a little GENETIC VARIANCE?? 📉😤 mutants aren't a BUG bestie, they're a ✨FEATURE✨!! they're literally DISRUPTORS!! do you know what a limeblood could do with their special little flickery flamey quirks in the PHARMACEUTICAL space?? we're talking VERTICAL INTEGRATION with the medical industrial complex!!! MEDICTATORS WISH they had this kind of potential!!!! we're talking PATENTS!! we're talking EXCLUSIVE DISTRIBUTION RIGHTS!!!!! we are talking IMPOSSIBLE RETURNS 💉💰 #MutantsAreIrreplaceable #SpeciallyEconomically #DisruptTheHemospectrum #LimebloodLucious #SigmaSweeps #ChairministranglerThoughtLeadership #ProbShouldntCullMeImAnAssetClass #WhyShootOurselvesInTheFrondJusttoStickToOurGuns✨📊🐕 🟢✨ CHARMS is logging off before the drones get dispatched (jk i have a VPN bestie, i'm ALWAYS ONLINE)
* Flowers are actually quite thankful of those who have taken care of them and the effort they put in for us. * I... I mean them.
👌🤏wow??? WOW??? okay???? OKAY!!! talk about bitty bulge energy, @handMaid !!!! remove all my badges? REMOVE ALL MY BADGES? you asked harmless sweet snuggleluvva special specs cutie eye @imJunior to REMOVE ALL MY BADGES?🤏👌 🙏are you fucking kidding me🙏 🤚🤚girl 🫱 🫱 👎👎👎i worked hard for my badges these are HOLDERS of my shares my likes my hates my pities and my mediates👎👎👎 👏organic👏hand-leveled👏authentically engaged👏entirely ground zero up👏no foundation👏industry unplanted👏 🤏and only SLIGHTLY nudged along by my alt hand(le)s🤏 🙏i make quality content the masses (over like 40+ REAL followers) produced entirely free to the unblinking attention and touch starved masses who gratefully engage and show me kindness unlike anything ive ever encountered in my lifes start to finish span (including the nondamara reading this ilusm omg hi bestie)🙏 🫰🫰🫰but for you to bitch and moan and whinge and whine and him and haw and she and shit until you get your way??? including involving junior???? junior cant remove badges!!! what did you expect him to just remove them from my account and reissue them? on a HIGH PAIN DAY when i CANNOT click them back easy???? which is exactly what he did???? wow just wow you are WORSE than the COWARD who doxxed me and ding dong ditched afterwards this is doing too much🫰🫰🫰 🤙hayyyy lil j @imJunior🤙 😁➰😁⭐🏆🌍🥂 grab this bitch's shameglobes and twist counterclockwise until she feels something worth a nomination to the shame golden globe awards⭐🏆🌍🥂 😁➰😁 🛑✋🚫🤏 hope you dont mind the pinch points, lil d! 🤏🚫✋🛑 👏⚠️ barring that idfk remove all of her fucking badges and replace each of them with a new instance of the caution toxic badge⚠️ 👏 #Chairministrangling #FuckYouMeanStepOnHim #EW??? #DIE???? #AsFuckingIF??????????#HoneyIKnowThoseKnockOffKicksHaveBeenTheSameGoddamnPairDocMartiniTinyGotYouOnAHolidayGoddamnPerigeesAgo #ARoewzeByAnotherLameWouldSmellJustAsDefeat #Ed #ByAnUnrulyAssRustbloodsSelfAmusedTapDancingFeet #YouReallyThoughtYouDidSomething #IfTheyGoLowIGoLower #SweepForThoseScrawnyAssCluckbeastLegs #Like #WTF #WTF!!!! #WTF!!!!!!!!!! #NSFW #BecauseYourAssIsUnhireable #NepogrubBabyBitch #ImJunior #Handmaid #HandMadeWithoutCare #HandJobWellDone #YouTargetedANeurodivulgeant #WhoSharedTooMuch #AboutTheGoodHeSeesInOthers #BodyHorror #GenitalTorture #BallTwisting #BallBusting #BallBeating #BadStuffHappeningToDamaraMegidoBalls #Violence #Gore #TimelineBeef #Drama #Vagueposting #Directposting #VengeancePosting #Strife 🔴😡 CHARMS is IRATE‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️
🫶 there are no laws about the poke em ons casper there are no rules about handin it to em handily, i got 80 different HDs and at least 70 got a P at the front🫶 👀 🛑 ✋ but full stop? ✋ 🛑 👆 if too many reacts makes you uncomfy or peeved in ANY way, lemme know kayyyyy? 👇 🤜 you best believe i will lay off? OK? 👌 👑 your comfort and satisfaction ✋ are always a priority 👑 #Chairministrangling #Grindsettheplace #LikeABoss #PityABoss #HRaBoss #CertifyABoss #ConsultABoss #DiplomaMillABoss #Diagnose #ADHDaBoss 🟢 🌹 CHARMS is ON TOP OF MANDATORY SENSITIVITY TRAININGS.
Some have taken notice that the Felt has acquired a new member. I use the word “member” generously. Roewzi Charms has not been appointed, inducted, assigned a number, or given a purpose, but has nevertheless attached himself to our organization with the confidence of a decorative seal upon an impressive envelope. He claims not to have read its contents, yet we will determine the truth of that, won’t we? He advertises our personnel, manufactures their insignias, and invokes our names with such relentless enthusiasm that correcting the misconception would be considerably more difficult than simply allowing it to become true. Fortunately, his peculiarities are largely productive, and as a result, I have opted not to remove him from the roster of authorities with whom I pursue our greater ambitions. His innumerable qualities and metaphorically innumerable hands remain both of interest and of use. His attention is exacting beneath all of that noise. His capacity to make himself indispensable borders on admirable. Welcome, Mr. Charms. May your stay be comfortable and your loyalty unwavering.
Anyone else get followed by a swarm of fucking bees?
ETERNALLY HONORED. TO HAVE SUCH A MARK OF RECOGNITION STAPLED ONTO MY NAME. THANKS TO NONE OTHER THAN THE GRACIOUS ACTIONS OF OUR ONE TRUE LORD CALIBORN. HEEHAAHOOHOO. WOW THIS ROCKS. THANK YOU ROEWZI. YOU ARE AN INCREDIBLE CRAFTSMAN.
I Haven't Posted T𖦏o Many Clothes, Have I? They Can Be Hard T𖦏 Ph𖦏tograph In The Closet. Well, As Req𓄋esti𖦏ned. #thecollection
🫶 concept! 🫶 👀 🎭🔪🚨🩸 the purge 🩸🔪🚨🎭 🫱(‿but like‿)🫲 🫸 for unlimited purchasing of things you cant afford🫷 😩 we call it THE SPLURGE 😩 🫵 what are YOU buying unlimited of?????????? 🫵 #Chairministrangling #Grindsettheplace #LikeABoss #PityABoss #HateABoss #WhoWhatWhenWhereWhyABoss #PhilosofuckingAround 🟢 CHARMS is ONLINE.
how soon during sex is it appropriate to talk about my chemical quadrants??? #nsfw
☝️before ☝️during ☝️and after ☝️if you found the right one☝️ 🫵 BYOB (be your own bestman)🫵 🫵 secure the bad (your quadmate is in it)🫵 👏with your pick of the lot 👏make 👏 it 👏 a 👏 good 👏 one👏 #GoldBloodGrindset #Chairministrangling #SigmaArmAroundYourShoulder #Babes #BabesEverywhere ⚫ CHARMS is PRETENDING TO LEAVE AND THEN WE'LL MEET AGAIN.
🫶 ugh i love having supercharged totes unending psionically projected powerhands 🫶 🗣📢🔔📌y'all cannot imagine what a RUSH it is what a SELF PROMOTION it feels like how goddamn great it is to have my hans full with other hands which can reach out and handle tasks📌🔔📣🚨 🥺👉👈 just an fyi i would give ANY of you cuties a hand if you asked 😔👉👈 🤟headpats 🤟 🤟cuddly wuddles🤟 ✊👊 rockin fist bumps👊✊ ✊you could even smack ☝️ONCE!☝️ #Chairministrangling #Grindsettheplace #LikeABoss #PityABoss #HateABoss #NoMatterWhatYouBoss #YouGottaHandItToBoss 🟡✨ CHARMS is BUSY WITH YOU ALL.
💛✨👑CHAIRMINISTRANGLER CHARM$ CHECKING IN 👑💛✨ 🫶just dropping in a budget friendly promo no FOMO! read it when you wanna its not burning a hole in YOUR pocket🫶 🤑🔥 💼 EXECUTIVE POSITIONING 💼 Founder, CEO (Chairministrangler Executed Office), and Visionary Vibes Architect @ Lucky Charms Holdings International LLC (Est. Sweeps Unknown, Revenue: Immeasurably high, think quadruple digits) 📈💰 i'm literally the boss, bestie, i've been networking since before your lusus first molted!!! but i am ALWAYS down to netjerk around esp with fledgling self starters 🐣✨ 🫵 have YOU got a business idea? 🫵 pitch it to me! 🫵 let's MERGE! 🫵 👤 BRAND IDENTITY MATRIX 👤 🫵 BYOB (be your own boss)🫵 💛 caste: gold (#FFD700) - literally the color of wealth bestie, we stay GILDED here!! ✨ 📊 hemo position: ABOVE THE REST (the view is SCENIC i LOVE what u all do down there) 💅 🎂 experience level: 12 Sweeps of PURE HUSTLE (that's executive years bestie, we don't age we LEVEL UP we dont play we GAIN EXPERIENCE we dont lose we ONLY GAIN %) 📊⬆️ 🏷️ OFFICIAL BRAND HANDLES 🏷️ catch me straight strutting thru DMs as: CEO Charms™ | charmHer (verified) | CHARMS4HIRE (premium tier) | luckyCharms (aesthetic account) | luck E charms | The Gold Gilded GRINDSET | The Menace (affectionate) | The Handyman (i fix broken portfolios~! catch 👏 these 👏 hands 👏) | Corporate Overlord Roewzi (yes you CAN call me Sir, i accept tributes IF ur nasty) 💼 | Yellow Jacket (designer in my spare time AHAH i can make anything in your fave color as long as ur fave color is 𝐑𝐎𝐒𝐄 𝐆𝐎𝐋𝐃) | plus various PARALEGALACERATOR roles for tax purposes~! 😉✨ 🐾 BRING YOUR BARK TO WORK DAY COMPANION 🐾 meet cujojito barbisito barkbeastito~!!! ✨ my sCRUFFY LIL FUZZY WUZZY WAS NOT A CHOLERBEAR BUT TWICE AS DEADLY UGHHH I LOVE YOU SO SO SO SO MUCH MY SNUGGLY PUBBY WUBBY CMERE WHOSE A GOOD BOY WHOSE A GOOD BOY YES YOU ARE YES YOU ARE YES YOU 🫵 YOU 🫵 YOU ARE 🫵 GOOD PUBBYYYYYY 🫵 MY CHIHAAHAA!!! 🫵 🐕💎 MYTHICALLY rare breed bestie, requires specialized climate control because he's just SO high-maintenance #WORTHIT (just like his owner~! 💅). four-legged networking assistant, walkies aficionado, unrivaled barkbeat composer and vocal performance artist, also 24/7 security detail!! he doesn't guard the yard he guards the BRAND!!! the BUILDING! keeps that shit ON LOCK!!!!🔐✨ 📍 HEADQUARTERS LOCATION 📍 Lower Out Ward District on 12th, Spirebluffs - Garden of Eaten, New Trolleans 🏙️✨ we call it "The War Room" bestie, it's where the battles are fought and won!!!! 📊💫 (exact coordinates: CLASSIFIED for opsec~!🤝🔒) 💡 ENTREPRENEURIAL PHILOSOPHY 💡 they call it "stealing" i call it ✨PARALLEL ECONOMICS✨ they say "diploma mill" i say ✨ALTERNATIVE TO MAINSCREAM CREDENTIALING✨ they claim "no liquidity" i say ✨INTANGIBLE ASSET ACCUMULATION✨ "unregistered"? bestie i'm ✨PRE-REGISTERED FOR PRE-APPROVED FUTURE SUCCESS✨ "forgery"? that's just ✨PENDING ACQUIRE PROXY DOCUMENTATION✨ "fraud"? i'm simply ✨MANIFESTING FUCKING DIFFERENTLY✨ 🌐 NETWORK INFRASTRUCTURE 🌐 running IMPERIAL EMPIRE FIBER OP CO servers because we need that BANDWIDTH for all these 𝐆𝐎𝐋𝐃 deals bestie!! public proxy? that's just ✨DECENTRALIZING✨ for the grind!! 📡💻 🔢 EXECUTIVE CODES 🔢 ripcode: 59032-11 (vip access tier) decimal: 1501300818 (lucky numbers bestie!! 🍀) ✨👇⚡ THE BOTTOM LINE ⚡👇✨ 😤💅i'm literally building an empire out here while the haters stay MAD!! 😤💅 #GoldBloodGrindset #CEOlife #Charm$Up #SigmaSweeps #ItWasNotADoxJustABrandAudit #AndBestie #WePassed ✨👑💛 🟢✨ CHARMS is ALWAYS ONLINE.