Aurele Hemali
@avidApiarist
Honey Zupplier and Manager at Baker'z Douzen. Tiny and filled with hate.
Open to boytoy applicationz zince apparently it'z a crime to talk to other men. <__#> #rant
I need zomeone elze to pizz thiz guy off. You're probably the douchiezt, zurefire choice.
|| YOU KNOW I GOT FIRED FROM YOUR LAST APPLICATION BUT FUCK IT YOU MISS 100% OF THE SHOTS YOU DONT TAKE AND #SHOOTERSSHOOT | OVER ||
gee *hiz you sure kno* ho* to make a troll feel special
Zure, you're on board too. I might az well ztart a collection of boy toyz to carry me around and do my fucking bidding. <__#>
|| WE'RE GOING TO END UP HAULING YOU AROUND ON A MASSIVE THRONE LIKE YOURE A FUCKING PHAROAH AT THIS RATE | OVER ||
World'z denzezt fucker award goez to big oafizh idiot.
Quadmate applicationz are open. Anyone but @beearizhBaker, feel free to apply. <__#>
Wait, how many quadz do you even have filled @zpontaneouzZtratagem ? <__#>
|| LIKE I SAID BEFORE | I’LL WORK SOMETHING OUT | MY QUADMATES ARE ACCOMMODATING | OVER ||
|| UNIRONICALLY EXTREMELY DIFFICULT TO ANSWER | SOMETIMES TWO SOMETIMES ONE | WE VACILLATE A TON | OVER ||
|| NOT ENTIRELY? | MY MATESPRITE JUST WANTS TO BE INVOLVED IN MY LIFE AND MY MOIRAIL CAN QUICKLY BECOME MY KISMESIS IF SHE DECIDES TO BE A FUCKING BRAT THAT NIGHT | JUST HOW IT IS | OVER ||
|| SIGH | UNDERSTANDABLE | YOU STILL ON TO COME OVER AND SMOKE AT LEAST? | OVER ||
Calling out tomorrow. Bakery iz zhut down.
Criziz averted zince he'z juzt ZO fucking ztupid.
Guyz I forgot he haz chittr. Do I fake my death?
|| HEY MY LIPS ARE SEALED | I’M NOT GONNA TELL HER | OVER ||
|| OF COURSE I WOULD | IT’S NOT EVERYNIGHT YOU FIND A PRETTY LADY WHO WILL SIT IN YOUR LAP AND SHARE A CIGAR WITH YOU | OVER ||
|| WOULDN’T BE OPPOSE THAT | ESPECIALLY SINCE YOUR BAKERY SEEMS TO ‘BEE’ CLOSED TOMORROW | OVER ||
|| I’LL GLADLY MAKE TIME FOR YOU | AS MUCH TIME AS YOU WANT | OVER ||
How do you communicate to your coworker you want to bee romanced, but alzo you can't ztand him?
ʕ ՞ WE ARE fucking FAR pAst woRRying ABout it now, unlEss you’RE ABout to tEll mE you got thE hots foR youR fucking BEEs. ՞ ʔ
ʕ ՞ If I diEd who would RomAncE youR shoRt Buzzy BEhind hAhAhAhAhAhA ՞ ʔ
ʕ ՞ How thE fuck ARE you givE mE thE oRdERs foR thE BAkERy thEn ARE you fucking dumB ՞ ʔ
ʕ ՞ thERE is no wAy hE’d EvER gEt off thAt stupid huskpAd And mosEy his lAzy Ass BAck to RElAy thAt oRdER. EvEn if hE did wE Both know hE’d fuck up it up And foRgEt whAt you sAid ՞ ʔ
ʕ ՞ I’d pAy so much fucking monEy to sEE thAt. HEy if it gEts you to Buzz off mAyBE this will BEnEfit All of us ՞ ʔ
Honeztly feel like it'z zo quiet on here. Where iz all the drama?
it's a welcomed 8reak I'm gonna 8e so for real
Maybee I'm juzt not on enough. Thingz have felt pretty tame. <__> My entertainment...
oh yeah definitely, it's 8een pretty quiet lately. not even a perigee ago it was constant onslaught of terror
Theoretically, how many caztez would I have to go up beefore I got cruzhed to death in a hug by accident? I'm thinking not many.
if you get crusheD by a highblooD on acciDent thats a skill issue on their part! not crushing a Motherfucker in a hug is like highblooD 101. only reason soMeboDy woulD Do that is cause they Dont spenD enough tiMe arounD other castes.
Makez zenze. In theory though, juzt unchecked ztrength in general I guezz. Moztly out of curiozity. I'm pretty bird-boned. <__>
oh yeah its iMportant to check that strength. took Me sweeps to get to My current level of control. but it feels so gooD not to holD back with kin :o)
Haz anyone actually beeen to the guttercade? Or iz that juzt a cover up for zome other zhit?
Hmm. It'z on my lizt of "wayz to zpend a night off." Doubt I'll ever get to it though.
⦓ I'd like to go someday too! Perhaps it'll happen eventually, haha! ⦔
|| IM INCLINED TO AGREE | TURNS OUT MARKETING DOES WORK ||| NOW ITS JUST ABOUT FINDING A NIGHT I COULD ACTUALLY GO | OVER ||
Bee careful, you're gonna zay all that and the next thing you know? You've got a pounding headache, a new zhiner, and you're there.
⦓ Goodness... If anyone could do that to me I would be rather frightened! I'm usually the one with the teleporting capabilities... ⦔
There'z alwayz bigger fizh to fry. I'm zure it'z a zaying you hear a lot.
⦓ I. Well, usually not actually, I'm the recipient of far fewer fish puns than you'd expect, but. Yes, certainly! There's a significant amount of much stronger people out there than I. And perhaps they may want to take people to the Guttercade... Much to consider. ⦔
Where doez everyone go for leizure after work?
[BEGIN MESSAGE] aure|e. we|c0me back. :> [END MESSAGE]
[BEGIN MESSAGE] hm. i am d0ing we|| in my circumztancez. [ACTION:QUERY] iz tthat better? [END MESSAGE]
You know what. Az long az you aren't actively dying, I'll take that az a win.
[BEGIN MESSAGE] i am n0t. ap0|0giez. it iz difficu|tt tt0 exp|ain. [END MESSAGE]
Need a zmoke break and zome ztranger to light the end of my cigarette with theirz. Iykyk.
Great. I'm back in the fucking building.
Uzually I never crave zweet thingz... am I dying? Wtf.
h1ghly rec0mmend ruzh1ng t0 the tr0ll er
I can't beelieve I made ONE chit about trying to find zhort people and EVERYONE iz juzt chitting their heightz now. <__#>
The trend cyc/e on this site is remarkab/y short, /'\/e stepped a\/\/ay from my computer for on/y a moment and come back to a trend ha\/ing come and gone
Oh buzz off. It'z not my fault everyone wanted to make a contezt out of it. <__#>
Everyone who dizliked my lazt chit iz tall and upzet and it zhowz.
I alwayz zee annoying hulking tall people on here. Where iz the zmall zquad?
Lol. Zoundz like a non-izzue. Have them pick you up. Why are you putting all the work in for a kizz?
Don't want to bee awake right now. <__>
I think people who don't need glazzez zhould conzider wearing them az a fazhion ztatement. They look cute.
hehe, i do need them but i'm glad they've got a few fans!
They work well enough, but there'z zomething about a regular lenz though...
It'z juzt bonue pointz really. The fumbling around trying to find them iz pretty cute. <__>
𝄠𝄵𝄆𝅘𝅥𝅮𝅘𝅥𝅮𝅘𝅥𝅮 If you do not have to wear these cursed ear and nose bridge destroyers, I suggest you don't! I have to wear mine so I don't bump into walls and objects. If you want to wear them as a fashion statement, sunglasses are the way to go and then when you are inside you can know how it's like to be me without glasses! #winning 𝇓𝇓𝇓𝄀
꒰8 so cLear sighted normies can steaL naturaL stigmatic thunder? get fuck-ing for reaLz Lady appropriation aLert ⚠︎ ROFL 8꒱
Interezting ztance. Well, I like it, real glazzez or not. Again, fazhion glazzez are a thing.
Zo grateful I'm not juzt a corporate wage zlave and can make my own income doing what I actually enjoy. (Yez. I know I complain, that doezn't mean I don't enjoy my job.)