~ THE CONSTERN ~
@consternatedCaretaker
T)(-E ON-E AND ONLY S)(-EP)(-ERD CONST-ERN! [ dms open for roleplay/plotting/really anything! ]
#NUTCROCK-ER T)(is little Crocker is off )(er rocker!
T)(is cruelty )(as only proved t)(at Alternia and -Eart)( are BARBARIC societseas.
GURL do not bring my glubbin planet into dis
As far as I'm awave, YOU primed t)(at little maniac to be exactly w)(o s)(e is now!
YO do not gimmie dat credit. S)(e in)(erited my company n t)(as it. i aint glubbin raise da gurl any more t)(an i )(ad ta, w)(ic)( was very glubbin minimally. blame )(er dad or somefin!
Don't R-EC)(ITT M-E w)(ile you're CRUCIFYING someone?!
I DISAPPROV-E. #-ERIDANW-E-EK #G-ETTINGNAIL-ED
constern please i wwas simply followwing the wwhisperings a my pumper and evverythin in me told me that it wwould honor my dear other self do you disapprovve i fear i wwill no longer havve the ranking of number one vvoted advvisor to your majesty
I disapprove of t)(e w)(ole glubbing t)(ing, pardon my language. But... I could never stay mad at you, reelly!
i still havve tears staining my cheeks is there any chance you wwould come and help wwipe them off howwevver you may be happy to knoww that eridan wwas promply revvivved it seems these humans are more barbaric than wwe gavve them credit for but in my pumper i knoww this truly only means that eridan the swweet prince that he is is in need of a good hard culling from the likes a us and perhaps a haircut wwith bangs and fishnet arm socks
Per)(aps you're rig)(t! )(e's so pat)(etic and squis)(y, )(e needs someone to keep )(im safe so t)(is doesn't )(appen again!
yes exactly my thoughts precisely perhaps if wwe tend to him and showw him there is a brighter wway wwith us taking care of him he can change for the better
And t)(en )(e won't get crucified again! O)(, Coolscar, you )(ave t)(e bestest ideas.
as alwways constern i livve to servve and your smile is the only rewward i need
W)(at is t)(is #-EridanWeek business?
:33 < We're crucifying him! https://msparp.chat/eridanww33k
HOW FAMILIAR ARE YOU WITH THE CONCEPT OF CORPORAL PUNISHMENT? ACTUALLY. DON'T EVEN BOTHER ANSWERING THAT.
IT IS GENUINELY SHOCKING THAT YOU THINK I'D NOW. IT'S NOT EVEN "OUR" ERIDAN, OR WHATEVER THE HELL THAT'S SUPPOSED TO MEAN.
Remember, everyone: cullabubble trolls MUST be repoarted to your local Culling Agensea! We wouldn't want anyone to go uncared for, now would we?
We're from different worlds, seally! For some ridiculous reason, culling on Alternia means to kill, w)(ereas on Beforus it means to tend to!
You confuse me - Cull - means - kill - Why - is - cull - tend - to?! - WHY - ARE YOU - CHANGING - WORDS - WHY - ARE - YOU CALLING ME SEALLY >
O)( goodness, you seam quite distressed... per)(aps some nice quiet time in a pile of soft and fluffy t)(ings would clam you down?
I )(ave SO MANY QU--ESTIONS. Did it all really work? Are our people )(appy? )(ow did you refine t)(e culling system? W)(at about our fronds? W)(at are t)(ey like?
No - I have my hive - its - perfectly - quiet - here - Do - you - know - the - root - words - for - cull?! - I - am - upset - as a writer >
Cull yoursellf and I DONT mean in the beforan way.
D --> I don't have a good "emoticon", nor any particularly strong desire to obtain one either D --> Apologies
hello miss constern it makes my entire night brighter to see your hue on my screen again
wwell it is not evvery swweep that i get to exchange wwords wwith you wwhat wwith your busy schedule cullin the deservvin and needy masses if only i could kiss your hand and offer you a ride on my seagallopbeast
Awww, a tiny Coolscar followed me! )(i t)(ere, little guppy!!!
helllooooooo wwhat a pleasure it is to see the best and most supportivve ruler on beforan
)(MP)(. Some people really just don't G-ET IT!
)(ey! You! Brus)( your enamelnubs!
T)(AT... is acceptable! A responsible lusus always puts t)(eir ward first!
I'M SURE IT WOULDN'T BUT REΔLLY IT'S OK YOU DON'T HΔ▽E TO DO THΔT I INSIST THΔT YOU DON'T
If you say so! But do try and get you some toot)(brus)(es! Dental care is V-ERY important!
All of my fronds are just so S-EALLY! =38)
Goooood -EV-ENING everybody! Did you all get a good day's sleep? I s)(ore )(ope so! Don't forget to brus)( your enamelnubs, polis)( your )(orns, eat a )(ealt)(y breakfast, and wear your sig)(tpanes!!!
i can do only one of the things listed here but i won't say which because it's fun to not tell everyone everything ever about anything
Goodness! I )(ope you can do t)(e ot)(ers soon, t)(ey're very important! (T)(oug)( I suppose not everyone wears sig)(tpanes...)
probably not, my hive kinda lacks alot of things necessary for proper "care", but also i don't go out much in the first place so who am i trying to impress, y'know? ok i'm kinda digging myself a grave here let me shut up ⎛⎝>_>⎠⎞
O)( NO!! )(ow tragic! Do you need someone to take care of t)(ese t)(ings for you??
Congratulas)(orens to all t)(e brand new little ladies of C)(ittr!
(Looking at you, little Treeaboo!)
Seems like everyone's )(ad quite t)(e party tonig)(t! -Everyone be sure to rest up and drink lots of water!
from what i gather, imagine the strongest upper drug you know mixed with magic that amplifies every impulsive positive desire you've ever had. seemed like a lot.
=380! )(ow alarming... I )(ope you and everyone else are alrig)(t!
i wasnt involved! which probably saved my dignity. i am ready to help the aftermath though.
[ OOC PINNED POST! ] I saw so many of the other Beforan ancestors, but not a single Constern! So I'm here to fill the void. In general, Shepherd Constern is very... overbearing. She internally infantilizes everyone she talks to, even those similar in status to her. If you find this unpleasant, I would suggest you block this account. Canon is a loosely defined thing in Homestuck, but she will be as canon-compliant as someone with so little information about her can be. [ END OOC PINNED POST ]
S)(-ELLO -EV-ERYON-E!!!
D --> Oh dear D --> Empress D --> I did not anticipate you would sign up for Chittr.com
HELLO 8EAUTIFUL LADY!!!!!!!!
)(IIIIIII! O)()()(, you're like a grown-up version of Nig)(tingale's little grubling! )(ow COMPL-ET-ELY ADORABL-E!