Bronson Strider
@bronSon
▬▬ι═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════ﺤ **OOC Muse Descriptor: Bro Strider / Bronson Strider** Bro Strider, legal name Bronson Strider, is a 6'4" AMAB cis man with a strong, athletic build. He practices calisthenics in his free time, so he is physically capable without being a dedicated bodybuilder. He is a semi-recent college graduate who spent eight years drifting between degrees at a Texas party college, largely to keep the party lifestyle going. That lifestyle took him to some genuinely dark places, and it shows. This version of Bro is not a good person, nor is he intended to be read as a role model. He is emotionally immature, intentionally edgy, and often harmful to the people around him. He has very little moral guidance, poor emotional coping skills, and a tendency to treat discomfort like entertainment. His interests include anime, swords, mixing beats, puppets, disturbing imagery, and provoking reactions from others. His relationship with the younger person he lives with is unhealthy, hostile, and complicated. He does not view himself as a parent or guardian, and he does not approach that dynamic with the care or responsibility it would require. Conflict, intimidation, and fear are major elements of that relationship, though Bro often interprets his own actions very differently from how they are received. He will not talk about that person online. He will likely not talk to copies of that person online. **Content Warning / Boundaries:** This muse may involve themes of abuse, intimidation, emotional neglect, fear, assault, disturbing imagery, unhealthy household dynamics, substance-adjacent party culture, and intentionally upsetting behavior. This character is meant to be uncomfortable, flawed, and harmful in-character. OOC boundaries still apply. ▬▬ι═════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════════ﺤ
too many dipshit 'alternates' of me that go by 'dirk'. not even a sword. dude's a dagger. if i changed my name to be a weapon it would be like. kit short for kitana, which is a totally bad ass, gender neutral name belonging to my main in mk. or maybe clay moore. or something sick like that. not fucking dirk.
『ADVENTERROR'S FIELD GUIDE - PORTED FROM SWATTPAD @tautologicalTechnique 』 『 𝐓𝐑𝐈𝐆𝐆𝐄𝐑 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆: DUBCON PALE, CRINGE CULTURE, META FICTION, SELF INSERT, PLATONIC PALING, GAMING ADJACENT, AUTHORIAL INSERT, SPECIES BENDING, SECOND PERSON PERSPECTIVE, YCH, Y/C, UNREALITY, TOUCHING, SPORADIC PALE RUBBING, PALE AFFECTION, POLYQUANDARY (CONSENTED), GYGAAX X EVERYONE, YES THAT EVEN MEANS Y/C』 GYGAAX x KRYQUS // PALESHIPPING // FRIENDFICTION // CAVERNS 'N CULLBEASTS CAMPAIGN // SFW // MOIRAIL MULTICLASS // BOUND BY THE BOUND BOOK // @naughtyTechnician // @zebraDad ☆ﾟ.･｡ﾟ☆ﾟ.･｡ﾟ☆☆ﾟ.･｡ﾟ☆ﾟ.･｡ﾟ☆☆ﾟ.･｡ﾟ☆ﾟ.･｡ﾟ☆☆ﾟ.･｡ﾟ☆ﾟ.･｡ﾟ☆☆ﾟ.･｡ﾟ☆ﾟ.･｡ﾟ☆ ( Ꮚ⚀ꈊ⚀Ꮚ) < AUTHOR'S NOTE...mmffmm. Sorry for the delay this chapter!!! One of my moirails of four sweeps got caught up in a particularly nasty encounter with a Cullbeast of Unreasonable Hit Dice! Oh noooo!!! Somebody's gonna be out of combat fer more than one short rest!!! But...onto the fic!!! ( Ꮚ❖ꈊ❖Ꮚ); < The Caverns 'n Cullbeasts session shoulda wrapped hours ago...what in tarnation were the lot of 'em still doin' here...? These two ain't had grounds t'yammer 'n yap beyond stats 'n th'doling out 'o treasures accumulated...'n that took place hours ago!!! It took only a scant few moments more fer it t'really click with KRYQUS what this was even about...'n the thought still got dismissed with chudly indifference. Sensation overrode sensibility somethin' sorely suggestive...somethin' deeper...somethin'... ᴗ(ᴗᏊᄒꈊᄒᏊ) < Pale. ( Ꮚ⚀ꈊ⚀Ꮚ) < KRYQUS's trembling hands passed over the character sheet in metered measures...examining for errors, miscalculations, even just a rounding error in carry weight that could set his party back some...He was always like this. Thinkin' 'o others in tiny, invisible ways that made 'm irresistible to anyone with eyes 'n the time t'use 'em. Y/C can't help but buckle back a little as KRYQUS suddenly seizes Y/C's pencil 'n tugs it forward tighter than a nat twenty on an athletics check that he'd piledrive into th'enemy's inferior armor class...the clamp continued, as he started to...sink to ganderglobe level. The EMINENT INDIGOD OF INDIGOCELS who once towered like a one troll rovin' rules lawyer on hoofback now ain't no more than a troll, his imposing sourcebooks gone from a monument to a frame. ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < my character died ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < damn ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < toooo bad the same cannoot be said of climate change or casteism or peoople who talk shit and doont get hit ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < oor any oof the woorlds oother many wooes ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < but i can oonly doo ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < soo much ✧( Ꮚ─_ ─Ꮚ) < as a fat fuckin chud of hooned discipline ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < eventually ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < woorlds gootta save itself ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < oor perish unwoorthy ( Ꮚ⚀ꈊ⚀Ꮚ) < KRYQUS becomes a livin' study in humility. His words underpin the lessons endowed to him by ZEBRADAD. A lodestar. A northern light. The honing beacon 'o morality and th'straight 'n narrow. But his actions. His nonchalance. His utter unquestionably sheer un-fuck-withable energy...this becomes the mantle 'o kingly might he assumes at all times. This becomes th'monarchic tradition passed down from KRYQUS to KRYQUS every few hundred sweeps, so long as he's still around. ( Ꮚ❖ꈊ❖Ꮚ); <> <> <> <> JUST LIKE Y/C wouldn't all that mind bein'!!!!! EH? EH? EH? #FOREVERANDEVER #BUTACTUALLY #YCxKRYQUS #YOU+GOT+ZEBRADADS+BLESSING (ᗜᏊಠꈊಠᏊ)¤=[]:::::> Y/C felt inclined t'dispense comfort. There was a possessiveness t'the way Y/C saw KRYQUS cradle the character sheet in his palms. His broad shoulders cinched up like he dreaded th'thought of loosenin' a grip on this concept fer even a moment...but he put on a brave face just fer you. It wouldn't be right t'just let his happiness slip away. And read between the lines a daggum minute, world's gotta save itself or perish unworthy? That's QUITTER TALK! GLOBAL QUITTER TALK! DOOMSDAY QUITTER TALK! Kryqus feels THE WEIGHT OF THE WORLD on his bulky sturdy rock steady shoulders right now! ( Ꮚ⚀ꈊ⚀Ꮚ) < Just as Y/C up 'n worked th'courage t'confront his hands, improperly conspirin' t'mount a charge across yer thigh...Kryqus scoffs in indignation. He sees through yer transparent advances...and retreats strategically. All prompt-like. ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < tsk ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < doont attempt to knoow me ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < im way toooo cooool foor yoou ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < and even if i didnt mean that ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < yoou proobably shoouldnt @ me irl ᴗ(ᴗᏊᄒꈊᄒᏊ) < Uh oh! That got outta hand way fast...maybe it's time t'call fer... ( Ꮚ❖ꈊ❖Ꮚ); <> <> <> <> REINFORCEMENTS!!!!!!! ᴗ(ᴗᏊ❖ꈊ❖Ꮚ); <> <> <> <> My -- I mean Gygaax's hands start t'alternate between (#polyquandary anyone???) petting the tops 'o both 'o yer heads...!!! Soft. Rhythmic little circles. My --- Gygaax's cartilage nubs unfurl from the tightly white knuckled meat mallet into a far more approachable set 'o chitinous diggers with a piercingly pale quality...!!! Both Y/C and KRYQUS are treated t'the soft enmeshed interplay 'o palmin' play 'n no strings attached emotional intervention...c-consensually! We can stop at any time. Y/C j...just could use this! A-as could KRYQUS. To uh. CAVERNS 'N CULLBEASTS t'gether... ( Ꮚ‾̀ꈊ ‾̀Ꮚ); < "...Now, KRYQUS," Gygaax began, "Ewe can't be so harsh on Y/C...they've been through a lot. For our sake. For the CAMPAIGN. If anything were to happen to them...it would be on us to see to it they're protected and retrieved. Same as any PARTY MEMBER. Gentler hands should stir these waters. A SHEPHURT should tend 'n mend to its flock." If the two hands mussyin' up Y/C's body in tandem with KRYQUS wasn't BAaaaaaaAAAAAAd enough...a rovin' set of author-emblazoned fingertips were caressin' th'top of yer horns now. Pickin' out stray imaginary somethin somethins. Stalling. ( Ꮚ⚀ꈊ⚀Ꮚ) < Suddenly, the rush of hot breath excites the air...populates it with the powerful gale phrasings of KRYQUS... ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < gygaax ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < what the actual fuck ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < are yoou trying to say i proovide subpar care to Y/C ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < i literally carried this campaign ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < coomplaintlessly ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < Y/C with it ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < i resent the fuck oout of that implication ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < i coould easily be gentler with this ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < weaving lazy river ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < if i wanted to ( Ꮚ‾̀ꈊ ‾̀Ꮚ); < GYGAAX laughed. "Ewe could stand to be, KRYQUS. Yes. Just LOOK at Y/C. How can ewe say even a single solitary mean thing about that there cutie patootie?!" Tuggin' yer face into an awaitin' set 'o authorial brasserie, th'royal menagerie incidentally pits ya right in line with a EMINENT INDIGOD OF INDIGOCELS'S dice bag as th'aforementioned storms back onto his feet, now a monolith again. KRYQUS approaches our hug slowly. But not neverly. His arms hover over you. The river is still. Th'air itself thickens and compresses about yer skull, 'n horns, hardly blanketed by th'hoofbeast-scented torso cheekily just behind yonder... ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < what fucking ever ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < here yoou go lil guy ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < lap it up ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < <> ( Ꮚ⚀ꈊ⚀Ꮚ) < GYGAAX's hands tug around ya like a vanguard against harm. KRYQUS goes back t'bein his usual self...a monument of offended pride...he hugs you. And. Uh oh!!! Y/C feels a scraping sensation...nails possessively curled about one side 'o yer head, just at the barest nuggatory base of the horns (so embarassin'n!!!) and tracin' back towards th'scalp...no matter where ya look...t'KRYQUS or t'GYGAAX...both are complicit!!! A boilin' sort 'o affection wellin' up with intent t'pale, RIGHT ON TOP OF Y/C!!!!! (P1/P??) #SWATTPAD #Vacillation #PaleMoirail #TheWholeParty #FullCampaign #NotEnoughInventorySpace #SFW #YouAreOverencumbered!!! #XReader #FriendFiction #CnC #CavernsAndCullbeasts #KRYQUS #ImpliedAU #GYGAAXxKRYQUS #PALEMULTICLASS #AdventerrorsFieldGuide #CrossPosting #ScrawlThoughts #Drabbles #DubconPale #Polyquandary #TeamChud #GygaaxXEveryone #Palewhoring
( Ꮚ⚀ꈊ⚀Ꮚ) < OF COURSE!?!? ( Ꮚ⚀ꈊ⚀Ꮚ) < What an. Eheh. Honor. ( Ꮚ⚀ꈊ⚀Ꮚ) < And don't forget Y/C!!!! Which I guess is. Also ewe???? #Selfcest #Selfcest^2 #GygaaxXEveryone
( Ꮚ⚀ꈊ⚀Ꮚ) < Oh, it's still up! Ewe can always read it again if yer still confused...thanks fer your readership though! Really means a lot!!!
[BEGIN MESSAGE] i tthink. i have read tthiz a few ttimez n0w. i am n0t zure it iz c0rrect1y pr0cezzing. [END MESSAGE]
( Ꮚ⚀ꈊ⚀Ꮚ) < Oh, I can do a condensed version, just fer ewe! 『ADVENTERROR'S FIELD GUIDE - PORTED FROM SWATTPAD @tautologicalTechnique 』 『 𝐓𝐑𝐈𝐆𝐆𝐄𝐑 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆: DUBCON PALE, CRINGE CULTURE, META FICTION, SELF INSERT, PLATONIC PALING, GAMING ADJACENT, AUTHORIAL INSERT, SPECIES BENDING, SECOND PERSON PERSPECTIVE, YCH, Y/C, UNREALITY, TOUCHING, SPORADIC PALE RUBBING, PALE AFFECTION, POLYQUANDARY (CONSENTED), GYGAAX X EVERYONE, YES THAT EVEN MEANS Y/C, SHORT CONDENSED VERSION, MICRO, MICROFIC』 ( Ꮚ⚀ꈊ⚀Ꮚ) < 12 words. [BEGIN MESSAGE] ( Ꮚ⚀ꈊ⚀Ꮚ) < Pale stuff happens. ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < i KRYQUS do pale stuff too ᴗ(ᴗᏊᄒꈊᄒᏊ) < Y/C likes it. [END MESSAGE]
[BEGIN MESSAGE] ah. i zee. it waz dizbe1ief and n0t c0nfuzi0n. tthiz iz. n0ted. tthank y0u f0r y0ur eff0rt in c0ndenzing it f0r me. [END MESSAGE]
ᴗ(ᴗᏊᄒꈊᄒᏊ) < WAIT ARE YOU TWO NOT ON GOOD TERMS? I HAD A LEECHSTEPDAD FOR A WHILE. I SWEAR I CAN BE COOL 'BOUT THIS. IT'S NOT TOO LATE IS IT? I CAN UNTAG! ᴗ(ᴗᏊᄒꈊᄒᏊ) < JUST SAY THE WORD, KRYQUS!!! KRYQUS!!! KRYQUUUUUUS!!!!!!!
Ooh my goog he saw it. I will kill yoou.
( Ꮚ⚀ꈊ⚀Ꮚ) < ₕₒₜ?!????!? ᵀᴴᴬᵀ'ˢ ˢᴼ ᴴᴼᵀˀˀᵎˀˀᵎ ᵂᴴᴬᵀ ᵂᴵᴸᴸ ᴱᵂᴱ ᴰᴼ ᵂᴵᵀᴴ ᵀᴴᴱ ᴮᴼᴰʸˀ ᴗ(ᴗᏊᄒꈊᄒᏊ) < Who said that.
Ooh my fucking goog i can't doo anything with yoou peoople
hey champ. pick up that sword.
fym champ
bitch please
c< id ratHer My scytHe, but, wHy tHe fucK NOt, free swOrd >c
that will be the last time darren in 45b challenges my authority on the communal laundry machines. i have smuppets to wash and a business to run.
<action; query input; query: what is a smuppet action; statement input; statement: i asked someone e|se & did not get an answer />
currently it's based off of humans. but. i've been talking with trolls and the like to get feedback. expand my market. #nsfw
alternian dictionary for people who keep asking what obvious words mean. aggravation sponge headache. what you give people when you say "actually, on alternia—" anguish bladder the organ behind the forehead that stores dismay fluid. which explains a lot about the posting here. auricular sponge clots / hear ducts ears. the things you have and still don't use. bellowsacs lungs. used for breathing, yelling, and turning every minor disagreement into theater. blood pusher / pump biscuit / thump tortoise heart. different words for the same organ. some of you are still missing one. bulge appendage. maybe shoulder. maybe back. maybe hand. maybe something worse. use context clues. or don't. most don't. chitinous windhole / squawk gaper / squeal pipette throat. the vertical instrument through which bad opinions escape. frond / prong / point stump hand, leg, finger, whatever. basically, if it sticks out and does something stupid, it has a name. ganderbulb / glance nugget eye. for observing posts before replying to them. advanced technique. hemospectrum blood caste system. a normal thing to build a society around if your planet was designed by a dmv with teeth. ignorance tunnel mouth or throat, specifically when used for idiot noises. highly active organ on this platform. meal tunnel / protein chute eating hole. same general zone as the ignorance tunnel, but less tragic. nook crevice. entrance. sometimes throat. sometimes ass. great word. terrible conversation. nub any lump. shoulder, chest, knee, horns. a word with the precision of a drunk guy pointing at furniture. nugbone / thinkpan / sponge head or brain. in theory. posture pole / torso pillar spine. rare. endangered. frequently absent in replies. recuperacoon sopor slime sleeping pod. bed for people who need pharmaceuticals to experience a blanket. wiggler baby troll. also any larval child thing. most adults on here are spiritually still this. hive house. where you live when you aren't making your personality everyone else's problem. respiteblock bedroom. the room you should go to before posting. rumpusblock recreation room. the room where you should have kept that thought. meal block kitchen. place where food is made. not a metaphor. calm down. thermal hull / hunger trunk fridge. rich trolls apparently say fridge because even alternian aristocrats know when a phrase sucks. nutrition plateau plate. if you needed this one defined, don't breed. scalding leaf fluid tea. hot leaf water with class pretensions. breeze blender fan. what shit hits when the group chat learns screenshots exist. dong shouter / peal screamer bell. object that makes a noise. like you, but useful. dross coffer / offal drum trash can. where drafts go. ideally. escalation zigzags / zigzag incline stairs. a hostile architectural concept for anyone built like me. falldown slat skateboard. accurate. no notes. husktop / palmhusk laptop / phone. portable devices for making yourself permanently available to nonsense. snuggleplane blanket. unironically good. they cooked here. loungeplank couch. a plank for lounging. brutalist. honest. respectable. barkbeast / purrbeast / hoofbeast / woolbeast dog, cat, horse, sheep. alternian animal names are just sound effect plus beast. infantile, but consistent. buzzbug / stingbug / ripperwasp bee, hornet, wasp-like problem. bug taxonomy by how badly it ruins your day. dirt noodle worm. also good. annoyingly good. honkbird goose. no further refinement needed. that is the animal. trunkbeast elephant. one of the only times the naming system shows restraint. bury the thresher bury the hatchet. make peace. usually said by people who already sharpened another thresher. flip your thinkpan flip your lid. panic. spiral. make fourteen posts. call it discourse. spill the fart niblets spill the beans. a phrase engineered to punish everyone in the room. weakslime weaksauce. what your comeback was. wild honkbird chase wild goose chase. most callout threads. without a bean in your thinkpan stupid. finally, an efficient phrase. use more often.
hey. if you can't handle your emotions getting tweaked. your rage being baited. people being assholes. maybe you shouldn't be on the asshole alien website. say whatever you want to me. don't care. if you're too weak to take it. don't be here.
hate to tell you this but the meta ray bans i strap to my face aren't great at picking up speech to text mistakes such as euphonism (harmonious sound) versus euphemism (dirty joke). however. my blade does make a harmonious sound.
cant even type your own posts. must be bad with your fingers then.
too busy slicing up my apartment just enough for the landlord to not withhold the deposit.
Could always upgrade. #CanItRunHAL
my sword is not a euphonism. my blade is just that awe inspiring you confuse it for my junk. #suggestive i guess.
....euphonism....
euphonism.
did you even try to spell euphemism man.
euphonism lmao
Euphonism.
how it feels to interact with this platform. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/1e88cd333d25.png
trolls have weaker worldviews than i thought.
https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/32bb06a606d5.png this you? also tag your shit, idiot. #nsfw
here's my brononymous confession. i'd fight pretty much anyone here anytime. i'd marry none of you. pay your rent before you pay the piper by fighting me.
you know. its the internet. you're already basically anonymous. if you're that much of a coward you need to be double anonymous, maybe log off.
yeah I post my whole ass face and government name on here I dunno how anonymous this is
multiverse. also you post more than your face. regardless, it's so defensible.
if there was any risk your freaky alien government would have you vaporized. there's not. oh no. social stigma? who gives a fuck?
oh wow. a friend of a friend, huh? why should i care? don't attribute qualities like that to me. i don't care what they post. it's the practice of cowardice i despise. either put yourself out there fully, or keep it in. you don't get to mix and match and play by made up rules of engagement then bitch about it when it doesn't work out for you. maybe your friend should have stayed hidden. also. imagine getting handled by a clown. darwinism.
congratulations on winning bingo now. do something useful. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/24cb156c66dd.png
you all keep asking who i am? isn't this a text based website? fucking illiterate.
when your blade hits mine. don't bitch about it breaking.
bitch about deez nuts
#bronsonwatching
i could go for 5 guys. in a fight.