#1 yaoi connoisseur
@cryhoundColortura
🐾 woof8east maxxing on da reg 🐾 florid | he/him | master apotheculler ♦ @abrasiveCuniculus ♦ 🐾 DMs --> Open 🐾 the yaoi fairy of #wetyaoiday
|| INTRO POST || Your name is FLORID NIKIMO You live in the nice, breezy, forested hills of Trypanwood Hollow, with plenty of space to frolick around in the woods and forage for useful flora for your poultices. Your trusty lusus, DOTTIE, is always following close behind, even if youre WAY TOO OLD for this shit. You know what you’re doing, she worries too much! You were barely two when you fell down in that ditch, you’re a PRO at spotting wooded dirt-trippers now. They can’t get you, nothing can. Your life is pretty comfortable, you don’t find all that much to complain about. Your hive is pretty big, filled to the absolute brim with LITTLE SHITTIES AND VARIOUS TRINKETS, all of which you hold so, so dear to your pusher, even when you lose them. And fuck, you lose them OFTEN, you’d lose your own thinkpan if it wasn’t sealed up in your noggin. You’re pretty sure you have to have some holes up in there, since your memory is so shot it isn’t even funny. You’re constantly derailing your own thought-buggies, losing objects you JUST put down, walking into blocks and forgetting why you’re there…what were you talking about, again? You forget. You spend most of your time FLARPING with your TOTALLY AWESOME moirail, ANTILO UDATUS, chasing after him as he manages to injur himself in new and fascinating ways every time. It’s okay, though; you are a MASTER APOTHECULLER, your knowledge is VAST, and when all else fails, licking your wounds always seems to help. There is nothing that can stop the indomitable BOUNCE 'N' POUNCE, the two of you are used to being up against the world. You don’t spend all your time outside, though. One of your favourite hobbies is SLEEPING, curling up in your COMFY NEST and honkshoomimiming until the moons set. You are also Alternia’s number one fan of STILL-BODY FESTIVITY, a niche horror RPG that permanently altered your pan-chemistry the first time you played it at the ripe age of 6. And the second time. And the third. And that one time you played it for 10 hours straight for your moirail while voicing all the characters (and holding him practically hostage). Your trolltag is cryhoundColortura [CC], what will you do? https://toyhou.se/38871503.florid-nikimo
▲need t▲o drunk kiss girkls▼
▲fuggit▼▼
Liderally▼ donycare wgats ur ▲coordinates i can tp u over
I have not kissed enough 8oys today, my powers are fading...somepuppy...you must...revive the yaoi fairy...
gives_you_one_(1)_lil_smooch_:)
also somepuppy teach daddy how to hide a link 8ut still show the gif
YAY !!
right that's what I'm sayinggggg
i would say happens to the best of us but rweally it only happens to the worwst of us if we can t surwvive a single wipe without a kiss then we don t deserwve to last tbhonest if you feel the urwges deep within they have wrwitten materwial all overw online to feed frwom it s basically good enough assuming you have a good enough imagination if you don t orw you just can t rwead which is an unforwtunately verwy possible rweality then it s just completely overw and i think you rwe just dead rwest in peace
I ain't reading all that, congratulations or sorry for your loss I'm gonna go makeout with a hot guy
drop the addy...
gall⚣ping ⚣ver t⚣ sm⚣⚣ch! I have extra ya⚣i p⚣wer t⚣ transfer!!
https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/1311e7604a2d.png some fanart of @broStrider (and I guess FOR trollbama lmaoooo) #brostrider #trollbama #myart
// oh my god!! thank you!!
((hummina hummina))
(( No he looks great thank you so much!!
good lord
I have something inappropriate to say.
so there WILL 8e a meeting of the canids, pro8a8ly either thursday or may8e next tuesday..what are we thinking. we have much to discuss, such as 8est places to sniff, favourite 8rands of ki88le, and many other things
I will show up ★nd pretend to throw ★ b★ll.
sylink this will cause disastrous effects
Messages I never thought I'd send.
Do you people know how humiliating it is to DM the Sec of Defense "Are you familiar with those ponies and their war"? Do you?
He's a Strider so I'm assuming he does but come on.
no cuz i dont work for nomoby
It is very humbling.
I think that's, like, a type of flirting to him t8h
It was never a war, humanoid. I was an army of one, and through the fires that burned, the old guard of Equestria fell. It was only through... that WRETCHED pest, Twilight Sparkle, that total victory SLIPPED from my grasp. So many centuries without magic... But now, no longer. I will get what is mine.
And whatever that means.
In that case, I feel like a male bird. Waving my stupid idiot wings around in my stupid idiot dance. "What is this pony war?" "Should I pull out a nuke for this one or what? Please advise."
now THAT's more like it. do your little shimmy shimmy https://i.pinimg.com/originals/da/ae/24/daae24f3c56288fc8d9d776889fc07c7.gif
Yeah that's exactly what I feel like at the moment.
sorry a8out the evil hoof8east or whatever 8ut I accidentally 8it my own fang and scraped it a 8it and I feel like that's more important to me. the sound was awful and I will 8e dying shortly
I can still hear the scraping sound....it's echoing in my pan...8ury me in the dirt and plant flowers over me...
CORNUS FLORIDA !! !! !! !! !! I'M NAMED AFTER THEM !! https://huntersgardencentre.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/05/8log-Post-Featured-Pic-dogwood.jpg
THIS IS A GOOD IDEA...WILL START IMMEDIATELY
AWOOOOOOOOOO
i didN't meAN tO seNd thAt. hOw dO i deLete?
[I HAVE $OME REALLY BAD NEW$ FOR YOU]
it's OkAy. AFter gOiNg thrOugh A Few stAges OF grieF i've deCided i Like my h
they need to invent 'eating a lot' that doesn't make my tummy hurt
Y(o)u'r3 S(o) rIghT
?yeah but then wheres the motivation gonna come from for lazy lounge plank loafing all day afteR .thats the best parT
let me teach you about a liittle move ii liike to call the trash compactor push your fiingers iinto your belly, scrunch, and bend over boom. trash compactor
they have a solution forw that it s called a diet
THIS IS SO TRUE AND YOU SHOULD SAY IT LOUDER
xander, you are a genius. and never let ANYPUPPY tell you otherwise
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmno
.IF YOU HAVENT HAD TO USE THE GROANING LOUNGEPLANK AFTER EATING UNTIL IT HURTs .you havent liveD
they have to wheel me around
IS THIS SOME KIND OF SICK JOKE TO YOU ALL? WHAT THE FUCK! SO WHAT DOES THIS MEAN I WON CHITTR? I WON FUCKING SOCIAL MEDIA OVER SOME BULLSHIT BANNER CHANGE?! WHAT IS THIS STUPID FUCKING LUCK! OUT OF ALL THE POSTS I MAKE ON HERE TO REACH BOTH THE MOST LOVED AND HATED.. ITS THIS FUCKING POST?!?!?!?!?! YOU PEOPLE ARE ANIMALS AND YOU ALL SCARE ME IN THE WORST AND BEST WAY POSSIBLE. NOW WHERES MY FUCKING CROWN. IVE JUST PULLED THE UPSET OF THE CENTRY FOR ALL THOSE BITCHES REELING FOR ATTENTION. I WON CHITTR. #EXPECTATREATFROMMETOYOUALL. #IWONCHITTRANDALLIGOTISTHISSTUPIDSHIRT. #SUGGESTIVE
yes lmao
@walkstabwalK am finishd
Casey this is a genuine masterpiece.
EHEHEHEHE THAAANKLKKK UUUUUUUU
https://youtu.be/2ObSDYmMmUY?si=3P27r5nnN7Iu9lVd
YAYAYAYAAYAY AM HAPY U LIEEKEKK
ANOTHER 8ANGER AS ALWAYS CASEY !!
THANAANKKKKK UUUUUUUUUUUUU
honestly the wacky waving inflatable arm flailing tube man would have got me...
=oXO i don,t know if i count as a boy for the purposes of yaoi posting so for florid i will say um''' it would be nice to see two men holding hands, and they are whispering to each other thinking about what to do later #suggestive (awawa this is the most i can do right now i,m shy''' yaay) =oXO
you have 8een 8lessed 8y the yaoi fairy
The only thing I realized during this #Yaoi posting is that I need to marry him.
correct.
#whatdatmean
you need to put the ring on his finger Mr. President. it's the only way
only way to what????
ascend to divine yaoi status
Fair enough.
yesss YESSSS this PLEASES the yaoi fairy...go my disciples...spread the good 8oyx8oy word
Some Of You May Have Missed It. In Honor Of Florid, I Will Reintroduce It Onto The Feed. #nsfw #mybite(s) #nsfc https://chittr.ing/profile/complacentindignities/8a67748c-3b86-4e16-905c-949e6f476b89
https://media.tenor.com/qaf82ORlwWsAAAAM/sponge8o8-ascending.gif
Imagine I’m łaying seductiveły (øn my gøød łeg) atøp the cøncupiscent cøuch. And I have an arm spłayed wøefułły acrøss my face, før I have nø łarge man upøn which tø łavish my red-vaciłłating passiøns. Tø beguiłe with the nøtiøns øf Empire-enførced chastity fłøuted før him. Øh Where May He Be? #yaøipøsting
WHERE !! MAY !! HE !! 8E !! !! !! !! !! !! !!
That was a beautiful scene y⚣u painted. I d⚣n't see h⚣w any man w⚣uld be able t⚣ resist this call 0-0
I must be candid: the fact I łive in the middłe øf a tundra and am røutineły visited by Empire drønes might be a factør.
Aw man yeah I can see h⚣w that w⚣uld make things harder :( Still, y⚣u're quite a catch!! I w⚣uld think there w⚣uld be s⚣me⚣ne willing t⚣ make the trek f⚣r y⚣u
Thank yøu, sincereły. And I høpe yøur adventures in Beførus are, shałł we say, enłightening. :)
I don't see enough yaoi on my dash right now. *waving my magical yaoi wand* START YAOIING OUT NOW !! #yaoifairy
YES YESVESY EYS YE SY ESY YES 1 !! !! !! !! !!
🫡 on 1t, doll...
HE APPEARED WHEN WE NEEDED HIM MOST
heh... they used to call me The H1gh Seme back 1n the lost weaboo days... 😏
I’m repørting før yaøi duty, give me a møment tø cønjure sømething.
mhmmhmpmfmmfmhffh....
your talents are required here for the greater good
Hold On, Let Me Repost Something For You.
It’s been pøsted. I høpe I’ve dełivered.
doing divine work