Ptolmy Kanast: Champion Duelist
@irrefutableDecalogue
CEO Of The Kanasta Corp, Former Lost Weeaboo And Several T|me Beforus F|duspawn Champ|on. When You Stand Before Me, Put Everyth|ng On The L|ne. ( //icon credit: @legendaryLeague )
The Boys |n R&d Have |nformed Me Of An |nterest|ng Form Of Duel|ng Seen |n The |nfamous Tapes Known As "wacky Races". After Analyz|ng The|r Tact|cs |n Order To Hone My Own, | Bel|eve | Can Safely Say Not A One Of These So Called Compet|t|ve Motor|st Could Dare To G|ve Me A True Challenge. But Perhaps Muttley And H|s S|dek|ck Could Make Th|ngs |nterest|ng By Play|ng For Keeps.
Somet|mes They Don't Even Need To Say A Word After That F|rst Handtrap To Know The Game |s Over. They Just G|ve You That Same Look Of Defeat.
fucking ash blossom
|t Has Come To My Attent|on That The Empress |s Follow|ng Me. | Would Be Concerned About How That Could Effect Kanasta Corp Products, |f | Wasn't Conv|nced Her Mon|tor|ng Of Ch|ttr Wouldn't Be S|m|lar To Her Rule. |ntense, Probably Well |ntent|oned, But The Furthest Th|ng From Cons|stent.
|t M|ght Surpr|se Some Cons|der|ng How | Obv|ously Str|ve For Excellence |n All Th|ngs, But | Do Not Bel|eve Fa|lure To |nherently Be A S|n When You G|ve Your All. |ts An Opportun|ty To |mprove, To Hone Your Craft And Make Yourself A Better Challenge For Me, Ptolmy Kanast, The F|nal Front|er Of Compet|t|ve Scrabble. You Can Start By Read|ng A Book For Once And Com|ng Back When You Know A Word |nvol|ng The Letter Q That |sn't Queen Or Qu|z.
Excellent Job Follow|ng My |nstruct|ons So Promptly, | Would Offer You A Treat For Be|ng A Good Barkbeast, But |'m Fresh Out.
Yes~! You understand~! It is not so bad to be utterly dominated~. #Suggestive
<3-Hey.-I-may-be-good-at-following-directions,-and-a-barkbeast,-but-only-my-matesprit-gets-to-point-these-things-out.
| Wouldn't Qu|te Phrase |t L|ke That, But | Bel|eve You Understand Perhaps The Sp|r|t Of My Words. Probably.
@tezcatlipocaGodhood, I think you'd like this.
To Be Known, |s Part Of The Def|n|t|on Of Be|ng A Champ|on. And |n Know|ng Greatness Comes Fans. And W|th Fans, Comes Exam|nat|on. Some Not|ced | Have A Taste For Provok|ng V|olence And Made Art W|th That |n M|nd. Cons|der|ng That Th|s Too Could Lure Someone |nto Challeng|ng Me, | See No Reason To Not |ndulge My Devotees By Putt|ng Up The|r L|ttle Ed|t On The Metaphor|cal Thermal Hull And Post|ng |t Here.
((credit for this delightful drawing goes to my goat @gallivantingGourmand ))
((this is so fucking funny im losing my miiiindddd SFKLSDKLSDF wonderful))
↻ I'm sure this is a c∞mpletely reas∞nable image I can't see here. ↺
I would think encouraging that of an opponent might be counter to defeating them in a fair and honorable fight~. ~.~.~.But I will admit this makes you look tough~!
The Beforan Health Care System Has Made Certa|n People Over Conf|dent. |n No World Should | See Someth|ng So Corpulent, So Devo|d Of D|gn|ty As A “g|ga-stuffed” Oreo. Does The Craven Excuse For A Confect|on Even L|nger Long Enough On The Palate For Someone To Actually Des|re More, Or Does The Sugar Rush Knock Someone Out And The Trauma To The System Get Blocked Out L|ke Mammal|an Postpartum Amnes|a?
𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐂𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆… █ They exist for people who are victims of "Oreo Hubris" █ As described in this old internet comic. █ ... Don't ask why I have this saved to my files. [SENDING IMAGE: OREO HUBRIS BY GEOCASHIER ON GRUMBLR]
just started drooling dude stop
An Excellent Update To Deadlock W|th Prom|s|ng Characters On The Hor|zon. One Character Seems To Even F|ght Us|ng The Power Of Chess, A Cho|ce F|tt|ng For A Ref|ned Duel|st. Perhaps My Future Ma|n.
The More | Hear Of Th|s "aspect" And "class" Nonsense, The More My |nterest Lessens. As A Duel|st, | Am Fam|lar W|th A Great Many Means To Atta|n Power, And The Further A System Strays From Pr|nted Card Stock And Rulebooks, The Further |t Strays From The |ntended Path Of Power For A K|ng.
You have more class than any of them, Ptolmy~~~~.
All |s As Should Be. Peons Of The Local Recreat|onal Park Have All Gathered |n A Va|n Attempt To Overcome My Sheer, Raw Sovere|gnty |n The Art Of Play|ng Bocce Ball, And They All Fa|led To Measure Up. The Grubs Weep, The Elderly Crumble And The Common Troll Remembers The M|ght Of The Champ|on Duel|st And How He Crushes Dreams W|th A Mere Fl|ck Of The Wr|st That Sends Balls Of Baked Clay To Predest|ned Pos|t|ons Of Excellence.
Someth|ng That All Duel|sts Must Come To Terms W|th |s Whether They Prefer To Be Sent To Jumanj|, Or |f They Would Prefer Jumanj| To Come Out And Overtake The Real World. Every Troll Has A D|fferent V|s|on For What Const|tutes A Challenge After All, And Walk|ng Th|s World W|thout Understand|ng That, |s Noth|ng But Walk|ng Bl|nd.
/?jumanji?\ \?the?shitty?movie?/
You Would Dare To Slander A F|lm W|th Such A Compell|ng Prem|se To The Future K|ng Of Games?
/.well.it.was.kinda.shit,and,so,was,its,sequel,\ \.i.preferred.zathura./
/.or.whatever.the.space.one.was.\
L|ke The Sw|ne That Plays |n The F|lth, You Do Not Real|ze The Metaphor|cal Pearl Of Qual|ty |t Was. Too Good For Your Ph|l|st|ne Eyes Were The S|ght Of Troll Rob|n W|ll|ams Sk|llfully Evad|ng A L|on. You Would Not Surv|ve Even An Hour |n The Conf|nes Of Zathura Or Jumaj|.
/.spelled.jumanji.wrong.\ \.also.i.could,i,could,just,not,play,my.turn.and.sit.on.my.hands.easy.the.entire.time./
|ts Not Often | Pay Part|cular Heed To A Crowd At An Event, But Th|s T|me Even A Master Of The Duel|ng Craft Has To Quest|on Why Someone Would Buy An Ent|re Personal P|zza |n A Crowded Venue?
I have something to say but I do not wish you to loose respect in me~.
Hektor, They Don't Have Tables At These Venues.
I have two large prongs, don't I~?
What Does |t Mean For A Duel|st To Move On To "the B|g Leagues"? That |s A Quest|on All People That Pursue A L|fe Of Confl|ct Must Ask Themselves. You Can Never |mprove |n An Env|ronment That Lacks Challenge, You Must Never Rest Your Laurels Be|ng The K|ng Of A Meager Pond, When Vast Oceans Ex|sts Beyond The Hor|zon. But How Does One Know The|r Bus|ness |s Truly F|n|shed? To Leave Beh|nd The Whelps You Crushed |n Your Yester-sweeps Of Tra|n|ng And Cl|mb|ng? When Do You Dec|de Your L|ttle H|ck Town |s Too Empty, And Your Country S|de "fr|ends" W|ll S|mply Have To Stay Beh|nd As You Go To The B|g C|ty. The Answer |s That You W|ll Never Know For Sure. | See Some Duel|sts Racked W|th Quest|ons And Anx|ety As They Progress. | See Some That Never Th|nk Of Anyth|ng But The Next Bottle Of V|ctory Champagne They W|ll Sp|ll. Ne|ther |s Truly More Certa|n, Only D|fference |s Some People Don't Care |f They Meet Some Arb|trary Standard Of "ready". | Adv|se All Future R|vals Read|ng To Not Fear The Unknown And Have The Strength To Make A Cho|ce Of Where You Shall Go, Before The World Makes A Cho|ce For You.
Yes~!~! One must be decisive to thrive in this world~! Seize life by the shame globes, I always say~~~~!
Are you currently seeking new rivals, by chance~?
| Am Always Seek|ng New R|vals Hektor, What |s L|fe |f Not The Search For The Next Compet|t|ve Meat Judg|ng Tourney R|s|ng Star Or Talented Warr|or W|th An |mplement For Enact|ng Gratu|tous V|olence.
You're saying all the right things, my lad~. My implement is ready and eager~~~~~~~~.
W|nn|ng A F|duspawn Tournament |s Someth|ng That Can Be Dec|ded Before You Even Enter A Venue. Proper Exerc|se, Tra|n|ng And D|et Are Supreme When Craft|ng The Ult|mate Warr|or. That |s Why | Personally Vet And Craft Each Treat My M|n|ons Feast Upon, Ensur|ng Only The F|nest Of Nutr|ents Are |nvolved |n Bu|ld|ng The Muscle That Grants Me My |nev|table V|ctory |n Duel|ng.
|f | Held A Stream Of The F|rst Ep|sode Of Yu-g|-oh Season 0 Somet|me Later Ton|ght, Who Would Be |nterested |n Attend|ng?
Somewhere Out There, There |s A 42 Sweep Old Accountant Named Pr|ncess Walk|ng Around, And | Th|nk Thats Terr|bly Unfortunate. Unless They Comm|ted To The Aesthet|c, |n Wh|ch Case | Respect |t.
To Reach The Greater He|ghts As A Duel|st Requ|res A Certa|n Arrogance, An |nherent Assumpt|on You W|ll Succeed. The Bel|ef You W|ll Get The Opportun|ty To Do A Combo, That You W|ll Get The Lucky Opportun|ty, That You W|ll Be |n The Pos|t|on To Show Your Super|or|ty. A Loser, |s A Troll That |s Handed Opportun|ty But Trembles And Freezes |n Place, Because They Never |mag|ned They Would Get That Far.
♡⸝⸝ 777HIS 777RU AS FUCK ⸝⸝♤
Hav|ng Talent |s Not Enough To |mpress Me. That |s L|ke Expect|ng Pra|se For Know|ng How To Breath A|r. Oh Yes, Congratulat|ons. You Were Hatched. Hon|ng Your Talents However, |s A D|fferent Story.
|n Retrospect, Syl|nk Spo|led Me W|th The Duel They G|fted Me W|th. For The Br|efest Moment, | Made The M|stake Of Attend|ng A More "typ|cal" Arena, Rather Than A Board Or Card Game Arena And Was Rem|nded As To Why | Cons|der Beforus Bor|ng. F|duspawn And The L|ke Are Where | Can Hone My Sk|lls And Be Challenged, | Should Not Forget That.
1 wanna try duel1ng aga1nst you 1n someth1ng somet1me. what'd ya say
An Excellent Suggest|on. Perhaps Royalty Free Monopoly Or Drag Rac|ng. |f You Are Truly Brave, We Can Even Face Off |n Duel Lus||.
ohoho awesome. why l1m1t ourselves, lets do all 3
I'll duel you~~~~~. Not in Fiduspawn though, you would surely crush me~.
The P|newood Derby |s A Venue Of Duel|ng | Rarely Get The Chance To Engage W|th, But One | Rel|sh All The Same. | Do Not Part|cularly Fancy Myself An Eng|neer |n Any Mean|ng Of The Word, Merely Learn|ng What |s Needed To Converse W|th The R&d Boys. But | See Th|s As A Way To Apprec|ate What Exc|tes Them, Tak|ng On The Duty Of Des|gn|ng And Craft|ng My Racer W|th Solely My Hands. |t Doesn't Hurt That Some Of These Racers Have Some Of The Greatest F|ght|ng Sp|r|t |'ve W|tnessed On Beforus.