Falice Demode
@fortunesFavored
Why not take luck into your own hands? she/her
[569] One for two special on slitherfang oil tonight only! Get yours while supplies last generous benefactors!
Well with this in mind I don't think I'll believe you so probably not. Unless you are willing to listen to my purchase proposition.
[291] Why. Yes. I. Would. Love. To. Hear. Your. Purchase. Proposition. Generous. Benefactor.
I will place three slips of paper into three cups. Two of them will be different degrees of lowballed prices and one of them will be a multiple of your sale price. Then I will move the cups around and allow you to pick one, and I will pay whatever price you land.
[429] I would make a counter offer. I'm the saleswoman, so it only makes sense for me to be the one to move the cups around.
Please, allow me to take care of the cup handling. I'm sure it takes a lot of work finding and holding such fine wares, the least I could do is take a bit of the pressure off your hands and manage this little task myself. You get the fun part of picking your cup without the hassle of scattering it!
[444] Generous benefactor! Such consideration moves me deeply. Tell you what, four cups: One highball, one normal price, one lowball, and one for free. I mix up the cups, and you choose! What do you say?
Would you do me the courtesy of letting me set the cups up?
[428] Well, if you must. Though I must speak out of turn and say I do not approve.
I think we're both getting what we want the most out of this.
[831] Generous benefactors, we have a buy one get one sale running on all tonics! Be sure to get yours while supplies last!
OURS AR33 B33TT33R!!! Just say1n6!!!
[135] Which is why you have to yell over me? Sure. Generous benefactors I'll trust you to make the right judgement for your caegars.
Im not addicted to gambling im addicted to hope and theres just plain and square nothing wrong with that.
My bags are *already packed* my good man.
fuuuuuck this is tru kinda makes me wanna get back into the swing of #jadebustin again
#jADEbUSTIN MAKES ME FEEL, gOOD,
Im no sunday prude but good heavens to betsy dont talk about my granny like that. Tavvy i had no idea you were such a debauched pervert!
DAMMIT u got me!!!! godddd i miss it tav i rly do fml.... i think i need u to come over so we can bust one 2gether iykwim ;)))
wHAT? nOW i KNOW, i HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH, yOUR gAMGAM, cERTAINLY NOT 1N THE WAY, i HAD MY WAY WITH, jADE'S gRAMPS,
lIKE, rIGHT NOW, wE ARE GOING TO, bUST TOGETHER, rIGHT NOW?
yea rn!!!! u better hurry LOL..... lest i start bustin these jades all by my lonely lonesome!
i'M COMING, i'M COM1NG rOXY! aS FAST AS i CAN, dON'T YOU BUST, uNTIL i AM THERE, tO BUST WITH YOU!
I wish i was on the inside of all this hubbub.
[813] You wanna go all in so bad right now.
IVE,FALLEN,FOR,THIS,TRICK,BEFORE,THIS,IS,WHAT,THE,ROULETTE,TABLE,TELLS,YOU,RIGHT,AS,YOURE,DOWN,1K,AND,CONSIDERING,LEAVING
[283] Ah but it is such a pretty mask is it not? Come on, don't think you can win with the hand you're dealt?
YOU,LEARN,YOUR,LESSON,AFTER,HITTING,ROCK,BOTTOMM,I,AMM,UNTEMMPTABLE,!!!,!,!!HOPE,THIS,HELPS!
[777] Fish LOVE to fall for the "oh I'm just a poor rust blood uwu please give me caegars so that I might treat my land based disease" Momma just got herself 10k
[913] Slitherfang oil, just 20 caegars a bottle. Buy now while supplies last!
[777] Generous benefactors I'm running a buy one get one free sale on pitchforks and torches!
[448] Generous benefactors do I have something for you today! My team and I have been hard at work harvesting premium slitherbeast oil and we're happy to present it to you now! Rumors have it that a few drops of this on your scalp will help combat baldness! Others say that mixing some into your water drastically improves your health! Supplies are limited so act now before we sell out!
[281] Yes haha "omg XD" at how great these prices are for my generous benefactors!
[722] Hello generous benefactors! I've gotten my hands on some genuine ancient alternian artifacts. Dating back nearly 2,000 sweeps! They could be yours if you've got the caegera though.
[821] Of course to some of my generous benefactors I understand this isn't that long of a time, and to you I'd say to just consider it a novelty item.
[726] I'm glad you asked generous benefactor! Now obviously due to their age and rarity they're going to be on the more expensive side. But I always do right by my cuatomers, so the ballpark is around 10k to 100k caegers depending on the item.
[ Might I inquire the origin and cu|ture items within 10k-40k range, then. ]
[492] Of course! Those items generally belong to the ancient warrior class of the gladitorus, warriors whose job it was to perform combat for the then Empress The Imperator. It mostly consists of swords and spears, but there's a couple helmets as well.
I used To do This Too. PiCked up ArTifACTs from AbAndoned ruins while I explored And AfTer some reseArCh sold Them. You're doinG Awesome, keep iT up
[218] Thank you generous benefactor! Always nice to hear as an aspiring businesswoman!
[328] Hello, I found buried treasure in the middle of the desert, but I need your help to get it out. Please my friend, help me and I will repay you a thousandfold. I understand not everyone can though, so I hope this finds you well. Inquire below.
[663] I require 14,846 caegers to get this to a reputable buyer. When I get this all sold I will send you your share of the treasure (about 100,000k if I had to estimate)
[838] Are you a politician who needs sympathy? A highblood who wants to seem sensitive for a lowblood? A clown named pagliacci? Doesn't matter what the reason! You need to put on the water works but just can't seem to, happens to us all! Fortunately my team and I have cracked the code, crying is still a biological function. We are happy to announce we are selling methane wax sticks for all your tear jerking needs! Call now ((206) 342-8631) OR message me here for 15% off your first purchase of five or more. #ad #sponsored
[621] Not thr point generous benefactor, the point is these WILL make you cry if needed! How many can I put you down for?
owo okayyyyy but how much am I going to sob and weep and wail like are we talking gallons or what cause I need gallons uwu
[313] That's the beauty of it! It depends on how much you apply! If you need gallons you will HAVE gallons!
[581] Now I will admit for the standard model no, but for an up-charge anything is possible.
owo anya!thiiiing? can you make them have cute kitty stamps on them? how much will that cost? uwu
[399] About a five caeger increase per unit I'd imagine, but I'd have to check with suppliers first.
owo Okay that’s reasonya!able. I’ll take fifty. All with stamps. Just show me where to pay. uwu
[777] Wonderful choice generous benefactor! I'll be in the markets this Friday through Sunday, I'll have your order prepared for pick up and payment then!
[318] Along with all my other goods and services I also provide... "Problem" solving. If you have a "problem" in your life I will take it out for you. It's more expensive than anything else I do, but that's the price for quality help.
[729] They may call me a liar a cheat and a fraud. But you know what they never call me? Chopped. #stayblessed
[328] Opening a betting pool for fight night, I don't exactly have permission so keep it quiet okay?
[922] Shitty gacha game... didn't give me my five star... now I have to wait for the rerun...
[189] Who wants to purchase legitimate goods? Exchange currency for items?! I've got items if you've got currency!
[831] Come one come all! For a limited time only I've got an exceedingly rare shipment come in, from the far reaches of Northern Alternia my team has found the mythical wellspring of life! So, for a limited time only I am selling that bounty to YOU dear reader at an excruciatingly cheap price! Just 500 Caegers and you (yes you!) could have your very own bottle of wellspring water! Act now because supplies ARE limited and in my experience these things sell out fast!
What are the physical qualities?
[498] I'm glad you asked my inquiring mind. A smart consumer should always know exactly what they're getting! The wellspring water seems like any ordinary water at first glance, however the minerals and location of the spring give it rejuvenating properties! Just a little drink will leave you refreshed and ready to take on the night. (For best consumption practices take once a day and keep chilled)
.o°kay but this d.o°es n.o°t interest my maj.o°r interest is it naturally h.o°t c.o°ld flav.o°rful bubbly flat what?
[332] My apologies dearest benefactor! It's uh, it's water. It has the properties of water. It's naturally room temperature, and tastes like mineral-y water. It is flat.
.o°kay thank y.o°u uninterested then g.o°o.d luck with y.o°ur sales fell.o°w entrepreneur