♠ hated by @nebulousIlluminator

Okay, here's a REAL Vriska tip of the day! Here it goes: When you str8 8ulging down a guy/gal/whatever, make sure to do that shit in the 8ack of a scuttle8uggy, and make sure that they got a 8lunt in their mouth. Then, when they least expect it, roll the window down, guide them so their head is sticking out the window, and very carefully roll it 8ack up JUST enough so they can't pull their head 8ack in as you're giving 8ackshots. This move? Yeah, it's du88ed "the choo-choo train". Dropping you all some elite 8all knowledge here. Use at your own risk.
M<>st pite<>us, I wish y<>u g<><>d luck with that

o| AhHh u mAd, CaN’T EvEn mAkE ThE GoLd lIfE SoUnD NeArLy aS BaD As uRs |O

o| So fUcKiN GlAd i’m nOt a jAdE, cAn yOu iMaGiNe hAvInG To rAiSe sUm fAt cHuD WrIgGlErS FoR ThE ReSt oF Ur mIsErAbLe eXiStEnCe |O

MAYBE MAYBE NOT >83 YOU// SSEE IN DUE TIME IM SSURE HEHEHE >83

>8/ DID THAT CONVERSSATION GET THAT FAR UNDER YOUR CHITIN >8? HEHEHE CUTE >83

That's called sleeping, you dunderhead.

Well I guess I am krilling you to pisces, beclaws I am shellfish like that.

I THINK YOU ARE JUSST AN IDIOT >83
What are your Top 10 Hawk Tuah moments?

AwwwE mAtEsprIt chIxIE yOU ArE tOO swEEt!!! my pUshEr wIll ExplOdE gOOdnEss I lOvE yOU sO mUch I wIll lIstEn tO It rIght nOw, 500 tImEs, And thEn AnOthEr thOUsAnd!!!

OKAY >8? I// SSEE YOU SSOON THEN >8/

IT IS GOOD TO SSEE YOURE AWAKE TOO >83 SHAME YOU DONT WANT TO SHARE YOUR DESSIRESS THOUGH HEHEHE >83

HEHEHE THANKSS FOR YOUR GRACIOUSSNESSSS >83

YOU KNOW WHERE TO FIND ME >83 IM WINKING BUT YOU CANT SSEE IT BEHIND MY GOGG/ESS >83 #SUGGESTIVE

YOU /ITERA//Y SAID IT WAS PUB/IC YOURSSE/F >8P AND HOW MANY TIMESS DO I HAVE TO REMIND YOU THAT WE ARE IN AN ACTIVE CA/IGINOUSS RE/ATIONSHIP >8? OF COURSSE I AM GOING TO KEEP AN EYE ON YOU >83

ITSS PUB/IC DUNKASSSS >8/ AND I JUSST THOUGHT IT WASS INTERESSTING >83

WE// ISSNT THISS INTERESSTING HEHEHE >83 YOU KNOW EACH OTHER THEN I ASSSSUME >83

I'v3 c(o)nSID3r3D kulT (o)r kull farmIng, buT I am T(o)(o) lazy f(o)r ThaT Wh3n I c(o)ulD lIT3rally juST p(o)ST #mySlug anD IT haS Th3 Sam3 3ff3cT In b(o)Th DIr3cTI(o)nS.

THAT ISS ACCEPTAB/E THANK YOU >8/

FOR NOW YESS BUT I WI// WANT TO SSPEND SSOME QUA/ITY TIME WITH YOU HE/PING YOU TRAIN >8/ OR AT THE VERY /EASST I WANT TO ASSSSESSSS WHETHER YOU ARE FIT ENOUGH TO SSTAND A CHANCE BEFORE YOU GO TO YOUR FIRSST INTERVIEW >8/ EITHER WAY YOU WI// NEED TRAINING >8/

THEN WHY EVEN HUMOR THE IDEA >8?

>8{ I NEED TO SSTART TAKING YOU OUT TO HUNT WITH ME MAYBE YOU HAVE ENOUGH SSKI// TO SSURVIVE THE WORK NOW BUT /EGISS/ACERATION ISS A VERY DANGEROUSS OCCUPATION THAT DEMANDSS QUITE A BIT FROM YOU I ASSK THISS ONE MORE TIME ARE YOU SSURE YOU ARE UP TO THE TASSK >8?

YOU ARE CONSSIDERING GOING INTO /EGISS/ACERATION WORK >8? ARE YOU SSURE YOU WOU/D BE UP TO THE TASSK >8?

Oh wait hatebot is tweaking.

#mySlug

IM GOING TO BITE ANOTHER CHUNK OUT OF YOU >83 #VIO/ENCE #SUGGESTIVE

THANK YOU SSO VERY MUCH >83 I// BE SSURE TO KEEP THEM FROM THINKING YOU SRE FOOD TO THE BESST OF MY ABI/ITY >83

m3 anD y(o)u ar3 b3STI3S f(o)r3v3r :o)

Sh(o)(o)T fuck3D ThaT up

AND YOU ARE ADORAB/E >83 I NEED TO /EAVE MORE SSCARSS ON YOU SSOMETIME SSOON >83 #SUGGESTIVE#NSFW#VIO/ENCE

AWW YOU REA//Y DO CARE >83

I MAY HAVE MADE AN UNWISSE PURCHASSE FROM A MECHANATRIX AND NOW HAVE 57 ROBOTIC HATCH/INGSS TO FEED >8/

MAYHAPSS WE SHOU/D MEET AGAIN SSO I CAN TEACH YOU SSOME MORE >83

THE SHEER FACT THAT YOU NEED SSUCH CONTEXT SSAYSS MUCH ABOUT YOU >83 BUT FOR THE SSAKE OF MY BOUND/ESSSS GENEROSSITY I WI// TE// YOU YOU WOU/D MAKE A JOKE /IKE THAT >8{

THATSS CUTE >83

I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO CHITT SO PRETEND I JUST SAID SOMETHING REALLY SCANDALOUS.

⋅˚₊‧ ୨ Glad That You Didn't Die. If You Ever Wanna Volunteer Again, Let Me Know. ୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅
THROVGH·THE·ART·OF·IMPROVISED·THEATRE·VE·CAN·ONLY·ASSVME·THE·IMMENSE·GRIEF·EXPERIENCED·BY·THE·ANTHROPOMORPHIZED·NVMBER·68 THE·TRAGIC·COMEDY·OF·THIS·BEING·THAT·HE·IS·THE·LONE·SVRVIVOR·BETVEEN·67·AND·69

Give it a shot and we shell sea.
Nobodz ever sazs 77ha77. In fac77 everzone alwazs sazs Do No77 77ex77 Zour Fucking Expar77ner.

I// SEND YOU COORDINATESS TO A NICE SPOT WHERE WE CAN MEET >83 HOPE YOU /IKE TREESS >83

ON A MORE SSERIOUSS NOTE ASSSSUMING YOU DONT JUSST F/AKE ON ME /IKE WE HAVENT A/READY BEEN INTIMATE #PAI/INGSEASON ISS HAPPENING AND IM NOT ABOUT TO BE CU//ED WHY DONT YOU AND I GET TOGETHER TO FI// SSOME BUCKETSS >83 #NSFW #SUGGESTIVE #B/ACKROM JUSST TO KEEP FROM GETTING YE//ED AT >8/

OH YESS ABSSO/UTE/Y >83 /ETSS MARK THISS DAY TO BE FOREVER KNOWN TO BE THE DAY /EPIDA FIDRAK REMASSTERED THE ART OF SSARCASSM THERE SHA// BE MANY PARTIESS IN THE NAME OF THISS GRAND DAY AND A FEASST IN HONOR OF A// THOSSE WHO SHE B/ESSSSED WITH HER INCREDIB/E TA/ENT >83

IM SSURE IT WASS >83

KEEP TE//ING YOURSSE/F THAT MAYBE IF YOU WISH IT INTO EXISSTENCE IT WI// BECOME TRUE >83

YOUR DESSPERATE ATTEMPTSS AT BITING ME WOU/D INDICATE OTHERWISSE >83

ASS IF WE BOTH KNOW YOU WERE SSO VERY ANGRY WE// BEFORE WE EVEN /AID HANDSS UPON EACH OTHER >83 #SUGGESTIVE

ASS SHOU/D YOU RAINBOW DRINKER >83

YOU SSAY I WOU/D DO WE// TO CONTRO/ MY VIO/ENT TENDENCIESS IF I RECA// CORRECT/Y YOU WERE THE ONE ACTING /IKE A CRAZED BEASST >83

I WI// ADMIT I AM QUITE A FAN OF SSPI//ED B/OOD >83

THE FIRSST WASS AN ACCIDENT >8/ IT WASS ENTIRE/Y YOU WHO DECIDED TO BITE ME FIRSST I WAS SSIMP/Y RETURNING THE FAVOR >83

I WI// HAVE YOU KNOW THAT YOU WERE THE ONE WHO DECIDED BITING ME WASS A GOOD IDEA >8/ AND ITSS NOT /IKE I ENJOY HAVING TO WASH A// THE B/OOD FROM MY OUTFIT EITHER BUT I DO AGREE THAT ITSS GREAT >83

I FIND MY VOICE TO BE PERFECT/Y REPRESSENTATIVE OF MYSSE/F I AM G/AD YOU FIND IT INSSIFFERAB/E >83

INSSUFFERAB/E >8/

A SHAME THEN THAT I HAVE NO INTENTIONSS OF INVITING YOU A/ONG FOR THISS ONE >8/

I HOPE TO TRY AGAIN THISS TIME WITH A MUCH MORE COMPETENT DANCE PARTNER >83

AND HERE I THOUGHT YOU WANTED TO AVOID F/ATTERY MAKE UP YOUR MIND >83

>8/ I UNDERSSTAND YOU AREN'T GOING TO F/ATTER ME IM NOT THAT IDIOTIC >8/

SSEE THE FACT THAT YOU THINK IT F/ATTERING SSIMP/Y PROVESS MY POINT THAT YOU ARE HI/ARIOUSS >83

YESS I UNFORTUNATE/Y FOUND MYSSE/F OCCUPIED >8/ MAYHAPSS WE CAN DANCE SSOME OTHER TIME >83

I WOU/D RECOMMEND IT ITSS FUN >83 #VAGUEPOSTING

ITSS TIME TO GET ABSSO/UTE/Y B/AZED >83 #SUBSTANCE

AH THATSS MORE /IKE YOU FUCK YEAH >83

NO >8{ BUTT MY RHINK PAN IT ISSS VERY GOOD YOU KNOW >8?

FFUCK YEAH SHOWED EM WHAT 4 >83

IMMA RECUPERACOON NOW >8P #S/EEPYTIME

WE MUSST HAVE DIFFERING TASSTESS PERSSONA//Y I FIND YOU TO BE HI/ARIOUS >83

SSEVERA/ SSWEEPS OF HUNTING FERA/ BEASSTSS WITH MY /USSUSS AND A GOOD SSENSSE OF HUMOR >83

>8{ I WOU/D THINK TO CUT THAT POSSTURE PO/E OF YOURSS DOWN IF I CARED ABOUT MY HEIGHT YOU ARE /UCKY THEN THAT I DONT >83

I AM NOT /OW/Y I AM MAGNIFICENT AND POWERFU/ YOU OF A// PEOP/E SHOU/D KNOW THAT FIRSSTHAND >83

MAYHAPSS YOUR POOR RECO//ECTION SSKI//SS ARE RUBBING OFF ON ME >8/

I TRU/Y DO HAVE C/ASSSS WHEN I NEED IT WHICH ISSNT OFTEN >8/ BUT NO I AM SSAYING YOU IN FACT /ACK C/ASSSS >83

BY A/TERNIAN /AW I ABSSO/UTE/Y AM BETTER THAN YOU YESS AND I DONT RECA// SSAYING ANYTHING ABOUT MY THINKPAN BUT I DO RECA// YOU DRAWING ATTENTION TO YOURS >83

I THINK I CAN AGREE WITH YOU ON THISS ONE SSOME TRO//SS REA//Y DO /ACK C/ASSSS >83 *WINKING BUT YOU CAN'T SEE IT BECAUSE OF MY GOGG/ES*

FINA//Y GETTING SSOME SSE/F AWARENESSSS I SSEE >83

▲honestly if we just killed every man and serket on this site almost every problem we have would be solved▼

FE/T CUTE MIGHT BEAT HISS ASSSS /ATER >83 #VIO/ENCE#OUTG/UTMASQUERADE#FUCKYOU HTTPS://I.POSTIMG.CC/Y23ZH9XM/FEE/ING-CUTE-MIGHT-BEAT-HIM-UP-/ATER-2.PNG

TAKING A NAP BEFORE SSOCIA/IZING I DONT WANT TO SSEEM CRANKY >8/

>83 HEHEHEHEHEHEEHEHEHEHEHEHE

>83 I EAGER/Y AWAIT ITSS OPENING

ASSSSUMING OUR /ITT/E COMPETITION ISS SSTI// ON THE TAB/E /ET THE MOSST OBSSERVANT WIN >83

ON/Y CHANCE CAN TRU/Y TE// BUT I HATE /IARSS SSO I WI// SSAY THAT I AM EAGER TO MEET YOU REGARD/ESSSS OF WHETHER I HAVE EARNED THAT TIT/E OR NOT >83

YESS OF COURSSE I CANT POSSSSIB/Y HAVE A/READY EARNED SSUCH A TIT/E A FAR TOO HASSTY JUDGEMENT INDEED >83

COU/D THAT PERHAPSS BE ME OR AM I TOO HASSTY IN MY ASSSSUMPTIONSS >83

AN AQUAINTENCE OF MINE WOU/D SSAY THAT THERE SHOU/D BE MORE MAGIC IN THE UNIVERSSE I AM HAPPY TO PROVIDE SSUCH MAGIC TO YOU >83

A /ESSSSON WE A// MUSST /EARN AT SSOME POINT >83

YESS QUITE WONDERFU/ AND AMICAB/E ABOUT ASS WONDERFU/ AND AMICAB/E ASS AN ASSSS >83

I DONT I AM MERE/Y SSURPRISSED BY THE FACT THAT IT HASS A/READY REACHED 1200 SSIMP/E ASS THAT >83

I JUSST CHECKED MY KU// SSCORE SSEEMSS OBSSCENE/Y HIGH FOR HOW /ONG I HAVE BEEN ON THISS NETWORK I B/AME HATEBOT GET WE// SSOON >8/

THE SSME// ISS A BIT OVERWHE/MING SSO I WOU/D HAZARD A GUESSSS THAT WE WI// BE ON EVEN GROUND IN REGARDSS TO OUR CHANCESS >83

MAYHAPSS YOURE RIGHT MAYHAPSS NOT EITHER WAY I AM ANTICIPATING OUR MEETING EAGER/Y >83

I WOU/D ASSK BUT I AM SSTARTING TO FEE/ TIRED AGAIN >8/

CONSSIDERING THISS ISS NO P/ACE FOR A FIGHT I MAY CONSSIDER ACCEPTING YOUR INVITATION >83

ASS IF YOU HAD ANY OTHER P/ANSS OF ACTION ONCE WE MEET >83

CONSSIDERING YOUR ADMISSSSION OF YOUR /ACKING MENTA/ FACAU/TIESS IT WOU/D SSERVE YOU WE// TO /EARN A THING OR TWO ABOUT DEFENDING YOURSSE/F >83

AND YET YOU SSEEM SSET ON INSSU/TING ME ARE YOU SSURE YOU EVEN WANT TO RECONCI/E WITH ME OR ARE YOU HOPING TO PROVOKE ME INTO VIO/ENCE ONCE WE MEET >8/

>8{ I WI// SHOW YOU JUSST HOW DISSTINGUISHED I CAN BE AND NEED I REMIND YOU THAT YOU ARE THE ONE WHO PRESSENTED THE IDEA OF MEETING AT THE MASSQUERADE >83

ASS IF I AM ON/Y ASS BRUTISH ASS I NEED TO BE WHEN I NEED TO BE AND I WI// HAVE YOU KNOW I AM G/ORIOUSS >83

CONSSIDERING THE B/ATANT INVITATION I DOUBT THEY ARE ASS BASSE/ESSSS ASS YOU MIGHT HOPE >83

IM SSURE THERESS P/ENTY WRONG WITH YOU

HEHEHE SSOMEONE SSEEMSS TO HAVE SSOMETHING OF A MASSOCHISSTIC SSTREAK >83

⚇ what you gotta hate for, motherfucker? ⚇

WE// THAT WAS A TERRIFYING EXPERIENCE CANT WAIT FOR TOMORROW >83 #OUTG/UTMASQUERADE

NO I ABSSO/UTE/Y WANT TO SSPAR NOW I AM AFRAID THAT I MUST CA// IT A DAY THOUGH >8/ THE /IGHT ISS MAKING MY CAVERN FAR TOO BRIGHT A/READY
🐾waNNa hear a coNstrUctioN joke? awh, actUally... i’m still ''workiNg oN it''! ehehe, hehe,

hey champ me and your ma have been talking and i think we are gonna put you down #euthanasia







