Isidor Suidae
@piousPorcine
⚇He/him. ⚇ Scripture Schoolfeeder of Battleship Dark Carnival ⚇ If you've got a feelin', I've got a passage for yo' hungry ass. ⚇
Hey there! Some friends of mine and I have been making up troll equivalents for places and weekdays and other such things if anyone wants to use them! Don't by any means consider these canon, this is mostly just for personal reference and fun :o) It'll be updated more as time goes on! https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1au7RUsEoqUCcOQAb_1VYE5VNWBHX0Dwz1Bfi-FNWkQM/edit?usp=sharing
was reading through one of kurlys old dusty scripture books the other day (i get bored sometimes ok) usually its just giggling at their jokes and stuff but one passage actually managed to stick with me this time Sideshows 3:22 "So much in this life, on the worlds we make are good and grand when you dont have a BITCH MOTHER FUCKER spewing shit in ya spongeclots about it. SO LIVE THAT GOOD LIFE BROTHERS AND SISTERS. And if a mother fucker tells you not to? THEN ITS YO MESSIAH GIVEN RIGHT TO SHED A MOTHER FUCKERS BLOOD IN THE MESSIAHS NAME! For your greatest sin is to live a life our messiahs couldnt laugh at" ...yeah...
:o) Always proud to see you brushing up on the Wicked Word, my dear.
Amen S🖋️ster. Never Let A Motherfucker Tell You What To Be.
sUffErIng 18:58 “rEmEmbEr lIl sIs, EvEn yOUr wOrst nIghts whEn yOU’rE thE wAstEchUtE Of thE jOkE, lEAst yOU gOt thE mEssIAhs lAUghIng At yOU, crAckIng grIns And gIgglEs whIlE yOU wIpE thE mUd OUt yO fAcE” #scrIptUrE #mIrthfUlchIttr
"Never tolerate to be told what you know yourself to be, fam. I’ve told you what the fuck it is. The rest is on you." -Beginnings 10:5-6 #Scripture #inspiration
sUffErIng 9:10 "And hIs fAIth nEvEr wAvErEd, thAt Old sOng EchOEd thrOUgh thAt mOthErfUckErs pAn tIll thE flAmEs hAd lIckEd hIs skIn AwAy, And hIs bEllOwsAcks hEAvEd Only smOkE" #scrIptUrE #cw-dEAth #vIOlEncE
Wishful thinking, sist୭r? ၊၊||၊ ၊၊||၊
I... mEAnt It mOrE As rEmEmbrAncE, brOthEr...
⚇ Goin' from Mafia shtick to law? ⚇ Now Messiahs strike me if I'm wrong. ⚇ But that shit is bananas. B-A-N-A-N-A-S. ⚇ Funniest shit a clown ever did hear. ⚇
⚇ I read plenty. ⚇ Or did you all up and forget the whole Schoolfeeder of Scripture shit. ⚇ The only thing keeping me from Titling is my age. ⚇
READING ONTO THE RECORD! "scripture" is not a book
⚇ It's more a book than yo' ass could ever get to readin'. ⚇ Honestly ain't convinced you can. ⚇ You sure you ain't using TTS to read my shit out, lil' ad homienem? ⚇ Make sure to use one wit' a sexy voice, okay? ⚇
RESPONSE ON THOSE GROUNDS! SHUT THE FUCK UP if i used TTS you would be assigned the fucking driest voice possible. like a documentary narrator. the contrast between that & the incoherent hoofbeastshit you're spewing would be the closest you've ever been to being funny
POINT OF ORDER! also i'm prolific on both badreads & stochasticterrorgraph & they don't hang out fucking jurisceration doctorates to people who can't READ your assertion is a FARCE
⚇ Two messages? All for me? ⚇ You shouldn't have. ⚇ Also don't get so testy! ⚇ I thought maybe they'd made a special exception for you since they pitied yo' cullbait ass so bad. ⚇ Maybe you got a secret moirail on staff? ⚇ One that isn't the like like motherfucker, that is. ⚇ You strike me as the type to get low with a lil' infideliterror if it gets you ahead in yo' career! ⚇ HA HA HA HA HOINK ⚇
OBJECTION! Don't talk like that about Corvoe, man.
⚇ I ain't makin' any kinda comment on Corvoe. ⚇ This is about *you*. ⚇ I fw Corvoe heavy ⚇
POINT OF ORDER! well, i wouldn't do that to them. anyways INTRODUCTIONS FROM THE PROSECUTION! in what world would i *not* be really into legislaceration legitimately. memorizing the precise wording of different statutes & rulings, finding loopholes to exploit, passionately monologuing to the jury, occasionally culling some asshole on the other team for no real reason, etc., how is that not exactly my niche. this is my SHIT fair & square
⚇ HAH HAH HAH HOINK! ⚇ I'm just playin' wit' you, fucknuts. ⚇ ...Yeah. ⚇ Honestly? ⚇ It sounds like some shit you'd be all over like a fuckin' weevil. ⚇ Ain't ever gonna deny a motherfucker they passions. ⚇ ⚇ Blood 20:30 - “For we are nothing but troll at the end of the night. We answer call to Empress and Mother Grub and the white hot passion that runs through the veins of every motherfucker hatched. To fight is to live, to bleed is to grow strong. Your brother who fights harder than you will inspire forth further holy violence from you." ⚇
⚇ Currently watching The Angel Wears Pradiation. ⚇ Because the kids tell me I need to know more about fashion sense. ⚇ Which I'm sure is some kind of filthy burn but whatever ⚇ I'm mostly just invested in Meryyl Screech's hair. ⚇
i really am lmfao but, you also can’t trust me not to use it as an excuse to dress you in the most ridiculous getup imaginable
⚇ C'mon man. ⚇ Surely you can put aside your fetish for humiliating me for one day so we can get our fuckin' fits on. ⚇
lmfao i dunno man i am pretty hooked on seeing the embarrassment and fucking cracking up over it #nsfw enough
⚇ Bastard man. ⚇
MERYYL SCREECH IS MOTHERFUCKIN PEAK. GET YOUR MOTHERFUCKIN WATCH ON THAT FINE FUCKIN THESPIAN!
⚇ Despite all red flags, I still find you fun to be around #HoinkProblems ⚇
⚇ DAMN straight, biggest brother! ⚇
⚇ HOINK!!! ⚇
the~ gra~nd hi~ghblo~o~d's chi~tts a~re~ pro~ce~sse~d thro~u~gh myse~lf, Si~ste~r Ze~rli~n Ri~da~fa~. I~ ha~ve~ the~ gre~a~t ho~no~r to~ scre~e~n the chi~tts he~ re~a~ds a~nd to~ a~ct a~s hi~s mo~st mi~rthfu~l scri~be~. a~ny mi~sta~ke~s be~ o~n my fi~lthy he~a~d. --zr THIS MOTHERFUCKING ACCOUNT WILL BE A PLATFORM WITH WITH WHICH I WILL SPEW THE HOLY WORD OF THE MIRTHFUL MESSIAHS AND BEAR WITNESS TO YOUR FUNNIEST AND MOST MOTHERFUCKING UNFUNNY DRIBBLINGS. "BE WATCHFUL OF YOUR MOTHERFUCKIN STEPS, MY FAMILY, FOR THOSE WHO DARE DO FUCK AROUND WILL SURELY BE THE FIRST TO MOTHERFUCKING FIND OUT." -Sideshows 12:34 #scripture
blEssEd bE bIggEst brOthEr! AmEn!
BLESSINGS BE, LITTLE SISTER, BLESSINGS BE! KEEP THE HUMOR BRIGHT AND YOUR SMILE WIDE.
⚇ WHOOP WHOOP TO THE KING OF MOTHERFUCKING COLORS! ⚇ PRAISE BE HIS MIRTHFUL CROWN AND MAY ALL BOW BEFORE HIS HOLY RAGE! ⚇
PRAISE UNTO YOU AS WELL, MY MOST MIRTHFUL BROTHER! A SCHOOLFEEDER OF GREAT MERIT AND MIRACLES IS MOST MOTHERFUCKING APPRECIATED UP IN THIS BITCH!
BLESSINGS ON YOU AS WELL, FAMILY! WHOOP WHOOP!
⚇ MMFWCL, BIGGEST BROTHER! ⚇
getting bitten by multiple rainbowdrinkers call that a fangbang #nsfw #nsfwe #violence #gore -ish
.suolaej era ro/noitavonni etah ohw sreknird wobniar morf era snoitcaer etah ehT
⚇ The sleeping piggie says no biggie :8) ⚇
Big fan of this hog.
⚇ ME TOO!!! HOINK HOINK HOINK ⚇
⚇ Revelries 72:100 ⚇ "The giggles and guffaws can be found everywhere! The Messiahs sprinkle them out and around to make sure that everyone has a chance of finding the holy mirth. Search high and low, sister, 'cause I guarantee you'll find something to smile about sooner rather than later!" ⚇ #Scripture #MirthfulChittr #Clownposting ⚇
the most important part about posting a funny chitt is timing. a drop of water can look like an ocean in the middle of a drought
⚇ Godddd, this is downright PIOUS, brother!!! ⚇ Messiahs speaking through you tolight. ⚇ That was chuckleshit straight from the PUSHER!!! ⚇ Got me all feeling HOINK HOINK HOLY!!! ⚇
⚇ This could be the snort of something pig ⚇
⚇ Disrespectful ass MOTHERFUCKERS! ⚇ AIN'T WORTH SHIT! ⚇ AIN'T EVEN WORTH THE EFFORT I'D GO THROUGH TO MAKE PAINT OF 'EM! ⚇ TODAY'S SCRIPTURE LESSON WILL BE ON SACRIFICE AND BLOODLETTING. ⚇
what c/)uld have P(\SSIBLY inspired u 2 make this p/)st i am s/) curi/)us
⚇ Try and zap two fuckin' pancells together n figure it out, heretic. ⚇
w/)w chill tf /)ut, man i can’t g/) pry int/) ppls pers/)nal lives 2 learn abt pe/)ples drama anym/)re sighhh
⚇ For breakfast, I'm cooking for myself! ⚇ Wanted to remember my lusus today, so we got a tray of lasagna, wine basted hopbeast and rosemaimy and lamb meatballs in artichokehold ragu. ⚇
[BEGIN MESSAGE] tthat iz a |0t 0f eff0rt z0 ear|y. [END MESSAGE]
⚇ It's worth it to remember him :8) ⚇
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⚇ Not a lot of time? You ignorant motherfucker. ⚇ Like I didn't spend the first 10 sweeps of my life with him. ⚇ Like I didn't go through my toughest moments with him as the wind in my sails. ⚇ The sun at my back. ⚇ Don't you EVER presume to know what my relationship with him was like. ⚇ I will cut you down and leave your body to bake in the sunlight. ⚇ Get pecked apart by omensquawkfiends. ⚇
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⚇ Even so. ⚇ It isn't short now. I'm only 12 and a half ⚇ And he'll never stop meaning the world to me. ⚇
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⚇ Today's breakfast is like 500 pierogies, 12 burgers and handful of hot dogs. ⚇
HOW MUCH IS A HANDFUL??? :V
⚇ Seven! ⚇
MAKE IT TO THE TOP YOU GOTTA EAT TWENTY HOTDOGS DAWG!!!
⚇ Awh, motherfucker, I got like...A class to take. ⚇ I'll eat 20 hot dogs tomorrow. ⚇
WHILE THEY STUDY EAT THEIR HOTDOGS!!! :)
⚇ They ain't got none, the classroom is a no-eat zone motherfucker. ⚇
FUCK!!! INSANE LEVELS OF LAME ON THE CLASS FOR THAT!!!
⚇ Now what you ain't gonna do is insult my motherfuckin' schoolblock. ⚇ These kids need to learn the meaning of discipline. ⚇ They can survive an hour without food. ⚇
FOOD THOUGH!!! :(
Another dusk staring out at the moons, staring at those beautiful stars, watching them twinkle in the space between the pink and green lunar halos. You sip softly at a cup of tea as you glance upward. Some of those twinkles could be ships, one might even be the flagship dark carnival. Your mind wanders But the world continues on, and reminds you once more that its there as your palmhusk dings, and then dings again. Nothing unusual, sure you don't get many texts, you're not exactly a social butterfly, but you have a nice handful of friends you have curated over the last perigree and a half hiding from the clurch. You leave the palmhusk for a moment and consider how things have gone since then. Raised for most of your life to be the tenth medium of the Grand Highblood, the Ninth had fallen bedridden and you were to be shipped off for early exile, and, you ran rather than even answer as they called to tell you orders. Had you heard an order to leave the planet by He of High Mirth himself, you are unsure if you'd have still been able to run. Brother Isidor had told you that you were being hunted, you covered your face with a veil, and holed up in your matesprit's hive. There you sayed, locked up in isolation, slowly going stir crazy from a lack of contact to your faith and friends. Your palmhusk pings a third time, and you finally decide to check. It's from a sister of the faith, one whom had promised to check in on the status of your investigation with her ancestor aboard the flagship. It was a screenshot of a conversation. The first mentions the case was closed, two perigrees ago? So to say, the 9th medium lived... The call wasn't a summons, it was a relief of duty. The second, notes surveillance is ongoing for the 'asset' in case of further inobedience. Followed closely by a picture, taken from high up, perhaps a satellite or drone? Pointed right at the hive you were in, through the window, at yourself staring up towards the stars. You close the palmhusk. ha... ha- hahahah oh-oh goodness oh goodness oh messiahs... this- this is- You were never running away, you were a hamster on a wheel. Never once did you leave your cage. Toyed with by spirits in their employ angry at the disrespect, but not the disobedience. They held back. Not once were you out of their grasp, you were being humored. It was all a grand joke, and you Ursila, were the punchline. Your laugh echoes through the hive with choked sobs as you lay on the carpet, and you swear you can hear the Messiahs laughing back at you.
⚇ I ain't shed no blood in a hot minute. ⚇ I'm goin' soft. ⚇ Maybe this is the Messiahs sayin' I gotta dig my claws in. ⚇ If not into them. ⚇ Into some other meat. ⚇
⚇ Hate it when they get all cutesy. ⚇ Fuck you got to be smilin' at each other for? ⚇ Makes my tusks ache. ⚇
⚇ Took sermon today. ⚇ There's really nothing like riling the crowd up like that ⚇ Working everyone up into a fever pitch ⚇ Really feeling the power of the Messiahs in the room. ⚇ The kids ain't seen me do that before now. ⚇ GOD, the sparkle in their motherfuckin eyes! ⚇ That was purest motherfuckin' BELIEF and FAITH right there! ⚇ I could never leave this family. ⚇ MY family. ⚇ OUR family!!! ⚇
sounds fuckin dope man. yall clowns seem chill
⚇ Fuck yeah brother ⚇ We just tryna get down with the wicked shit, know what I mean? ⚇
⚇ Now listening: ⚇ ⚇ Super Trouper - Abbaration ⚇