♦ pitied by @synchronizedChemist
I JUST DROPPHED MY FUCKIGNGN SODA ALL OVER MG LAP
<Yĕărnĭng thĭs ănd yĕărnĭng / thăt. Whĕn's sŏmĕŏnĕ gŏĭng / tŏ măkĕ ă cŏmprĕhĕnsĭvĕ / pŏst ăbŏŭt thĕ ĕrŏtĭc / ĭmăgĕry ŏf rŏt ănd / scăvĕngĕrs.>
[T] Think my glasses are bent.] [A] Add that to the towering pile of my deep regrets.]
Kissing is s0 weird and gr0ss if y0u really think ab0ut it
4ccident4lly 4te 4 book she lent me now i h4ve to 9host
// he's so okay rn though. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/a0d79d306ea9.jpeg
-- chillerAficionado [CA] dropped his phone in the lake --
anxious #cw-blood https://file.garden/ZXTQg2HNBXlcqhN2/4.png
thats a lotta shout poles for someone who didnt mean men
>:εε i r3ad too much m3n th3r3 ~
ok. better yet. slaps cheese in your face.
((pretend that I clicked ooc there okay))
had generational aura loss by fallin while gettin onto my motorbuggy PLEASE
Chewing on ice again.
[⚙︎ Like ha|f the bar I'm in is current|y pu||ing out weapons so I'm sure everything is fine. ⚙︎]
IN A SHOCKING TURN OF EVENTS: MY CHRONIC PAIN IS INDEED, CHRONIC AND I AM, INDEED, IN PAIN.
...every time I leave my hive, it feels like someone's watching me. I don't like it.
[EMPLOYEE SOCIAL MEDIA CREDITS: 1/3] [S] Someone made me think about sex with boss.] [W] Want to bury self alive.] [U] Universe constantly punishing me.] [D] Doesn't help that boss keeps loitering by my desk and asking personal questions.] [A] Am I in danger?] [EMPLOYEE SOCIAL MEDIA CREDITS: 0/3. TO CONTINUE USING SOCIAL MEDIA, LOG IN TO EMPLOYEE PORTAL AND PURCHASE ADDITIONAL CREDITS.] #nsfw
DONT BELIEVE WHAT THEY TELL YOU ABOUT HYPERTENSION its a trick to guile you into buying more blood thinners so they can SAP YOU DRY when they BITE YOU.
instructions.unclear,.broke.my.neck
. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁. My toxi⏾ trait is that wh༄n I know th༄r༄'s no happy ༄nding in stor༄ for som༄on༄, I simply stop ⏾aring; why b༄⏾om༄ inv༄st༄d wh༄n only mis༄ry awaits? . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁.
▲just realized the barkbeast cage was next to the loungeplank while we pailed...▼
[OK IM JU$T GONNA GO ROLL ON THE FLOOR #YEARNING]
I got to$$ed in a lake once
[HONE$TLY HE ALREADY MADE ME INTO A WAIFU I DON'T THINK ID MIND]
eating cables.
Just discovered my friends betted on my sexuality, their theories have gone a bit too far.
le♀ i♀ be known ♀ha♀ even ♀hrough my pale crush DDying, my kismesis ge♀♀ing murDDereDD, anDD my hive burning DDown i never misseDD a single nigh♀ of my gacha nigh♀lies
Gentle reminder that yearning is no+t less pathetic because yo+u're queer.
think i burnt my feet on the desert sand B////⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠹⣿⣷⣶⣤⣄⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡴⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢸⣇⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣀⣠⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣷⠈⢿⣦⣘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⠙⢿⣦⣄⣉⣹⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣌⣉⣉⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣴⠾⠟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⠛⠉⠀⠀⠀⠙⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣼⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢰⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠻⢿⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀
im visiting my friend hayaah but I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE LIKE A BEACH. BECAUSE OF THE SAND. WHY DOES HTE AIR BURN???? B((((⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠹⣿⣷⣶⣤⣄⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡴⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢸⣇⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣀⣠⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣷⠈⢿⣦⣘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⠙⢿⣦⣄⣉⣹⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣌⣉⣉⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣴⠾⠟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⠛⠉⠀⠀⠀⠙⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣼⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢰⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠻⢿⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀
Oh my Cod guys the desert is really really really hot :(⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠹⣿⣷⣶⣤⣄⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡴⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢸⣇⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣀⣠⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣷⠈⢿⣦⣘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⠙⢿⣦⣄⣉⣹⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣌⣉⣉⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣴⠾⠟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⠛⠉⠀⠀⠀⠙⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣼⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢰⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠻⢿⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀
[O] OH MY GOD. DOUBLE UR PULL] [L] LUCK IS FINALLY IN I CAN'T BELI [adeptAdjuctant has disconnected. CODE: 07167 IMPROPER CONDUCT] https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/98926c88b2eb.jpeg
[OKAY #AN $OMEBODY TALK ME INTO NOT HOOKING ↑ WITH NEEIHT]
---- |oh that's nice I think I hope it's a troll you like anyway but um I I um I just I just noticed your user name um I don't think I like that sorry I'm sorry| ____
[TOO MANY $EADWELLER$ IN MY NOOK RIGHT NOW DOE$ ANYONE EL$E WHO I$NT A VIOLETBLOOD WANT TO HOOK ↑ OH NO WAIT NEVERMIND IM $↑PO$ED TO $TOP HOOKING ↑ WITH GUY$ I HAVE A $HOW TO RUN! ]
lickin my uranium. #myuranium
hi im mr penis ow i just got hit by a uranium chunk
[I THINK I NEED TO $TOP HOOKING ↑ WITH MY #ONTE$TANT$ I$ MAKING ME BIA$ED #RIT#HYLOVE #$UGGE$TIVE]
w∞ke twink guy didn't even start a lame fight t∞night 🥺 I'M B∞RED 😠
817 MY V4P3 700 H4RD 4ND 17 FUCK1NG 5H0CK3D M3!!! WH47 7H3 FUCK!!! WHY C4N 7H3 5U8574NC3 48U53 M3 84CK!!? WH0 CL34R3D 7H15!???
[OH YKNOW JU$T $TARING AT HI$ ANTIDEPRE$$ANT$? UHM NOTHING A#TUALLY]
I will try to be extra careful to make sure this does not happen
I would never abuse substances. I love them very much.
[OH NO HE #ONQUERED *MY* HEART!]
[I AM $O IN LOVE #HITTR I AM $O IN LOVE IM $QUEALING INTO MY PILLOW LOOKING AT HI$ #HIT$ LIKE A HIGH$#HOOL GIRL #VAGUEPO$TING #YEARNING]
⦓ That is a little more than it used to cost, certainly, but prices are always rising, aren't they? Let me wire it your way. ⦔ --- nautiliteMooncatcher has sent 40 Boondollars! ---
[ADDENDUM:] This is satire I'm working extremely hard.]
I'm ∞pening b∞yfriend applicati∞ns 😒
i h4t4 my job so 4v4ryon4's posts 4r4 g4tting h4t4d
I like to think I'm a rather stable and unshakable man, but "I'm imagining you pregnant and miserable" was a series of words I was not prepared to hear tonight. #nsfw♔
"You h★ve no ide★ wh★t you're doing" Uh, ye★h I do, it's c★lled ★n "unhe★lthy coping mech★nism"
>+. WHY WOULD I DO THAT!!! ONE OF MY REPRODUCTIVE ORGANS IS IN A JAR WHERE IT WILL STAY!! .+< #gore ??
>+. I'M STERILE JUST FYI .+< # MY FAVORITE FUN FACT #nsfw
Ohh! UncOnvEntIOnAl, mOst dIslIkE grEEn flOwErs sIncE thEy fAdE IntO grAss whAt mAkEs yOU lIkE thEm?
You doubt my fertility~? #NSFW
Uh wh4t tr0ll??? 4nd wh4t club??? 50 1 c4n 4v01d th3m 0bv10u5ly.
shouldnt hav let that rando troll at club bite me in the neck, shit just wont stop bleedin now #hopital
cant a guy wake up in peace?
[NO NEED FOR THAT REMEMBER ITLL BE TELEVI$ED BUT ONE OF THEM I$ A PA#IFI$T $O HE WILL NOT HE FIGHTING]
[MISC.] ] [S] See why secretary quit.] [G] God I wish that were me.]
<)-> being 4utistic sucks 4ss dude 4ll i c4n t4lk 4bout is the 220-sweep 4go er4 when empereur noelop4n w4s still 4live 4nd its just 4 rebr4nding of my previous world cull 1 fix4tion from like 3-4 sweeps 4go. why couldnt i be fix4ted on soci4liz4tion or qu4dr4nts or something the olive c4tgirls 4re 4lw4ys cooking
+ we are good at floating + - but we are bad at swimming - + we are not good at making ourselves actually go anywhere + - but we think we could maybe not drown at least - + we have a lot to learn + - lots to learn -
i eated an iCe Cream 6ut it was half melted so it was a 6attle
Thats the idea!
(^･ω･^) < S33MS LIKE I HAVEN'T B33N VERY ACTIVE LATELY!!! IT'S BECAUSE I HAVE B33N OCCUPIED DOING ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!!! #IAMSOBORED #GIVEMESOMETHINGTODO #IWILLEVENPRETENDTOLISTENTOMUSIC
Im going through something only a shopping spree and making love for 4 straight hours can fix but no youre right i SHOULD stay optimistic. #nsfw
Has anyone else been experIencIng a weIrd feelIng of ImpendIng doom recently, or Is th@ just me?
THEY HATE MY AWOOOOO ;u;
thIs mIght bE trUE I shAll dO sO OncE EvErythIng stOps shAkIng
[↑DATE BEATLE I$ #OMING BA#K WITH ME $HE DID NOT WANT TO LEAVE $O I GUE$$ IM A FULL TIME LU$U$ NOW]
why dId nO OnE tEll mE cOffEE wAs sO nIcE! I hAvE hAd EIght cUps :)
[S] Sorry cannot lay on dash.] [M] Maybe during 7 minute break but by then I feel the trend is over.]
If people are laying on the floor I would love to join in. Unfortunately if I actually did that I fear that people would either worry for me, or actively step on me. On purpose. Looking at a certain someone who I currently live with who would do that. I will just lay down on the dash metaphorically instead.
// nvm i am not seeing spiderman today im seeing it tomorrow
[S] Stopped at coffee shop before work.] [T] Troll directly in front of me bought last chocolate croissant.] [W] Wish universe would stop picking on me specifically.]
Y'know sometimes when | see yov on the feed | w^nt to sqveeze yov in my prong like one of those stress toys th^t sqve^k.
———landdwƐllƐr food must bƐ so frΨggΨn GOOD. can you ΨmagΨnƐ ƐatΨng fΨsh that ΨSNT soggy???——Ɛ
that's a shame person i don't think i've met! it would have been fun to meet you.
Thinking ★bout getting hit with ★ big rock so I c★n h★ve ★mnesi★, ★sk me ★nything.
Being forced to choose is sickening.
[AND #HITTR DO NOT FRET FOR I AM NOT A TWINK, I AM A TWUNK AND I THINK I'M PUTTING ON A BIT OF WEIGHT..NO WAIT FU#K THAT$ LIKE BAD I #AN'T BE PUTTING ON WEIGHT]
vwait im thinking am i truely a tvwunk? i mean i vwas only called one ONCE quite some time ago. i mean i havwe a tvwink look to me dont get me vwrong at all but like.. ...hm. maybe its the fact my spear is pure gold that givwes the "hunk" part
am i a twwink
Had a patient slip me their number. Mood: Flattered! But the same patient is in treatment for peeling the skin off their moirail and wearing it. Mood: Less Flattered! #Violence #Gore
[M] Manifestation failure.] [B] But vending machine refilled.] [M] Mixed feelings.]
+[U] Going-to-start-eating-my-keyboard-at-work. :/
yknow it's nIcE bEIn so self-sUfficiEnt when it cOmEs to buggy work. EspeciAlly when EvEry rEpaIr shop in town has my pIcturE on the rEgistEr UndEr "do not sErvE".
there's a bone in my spaghetti!
My lusus is l4ying 0n Me.. he's he4vy.
I have been told I am 'terrible' at naming things. Cheese Onion is one example, but I also have a messenger owl to which I have named Birch, after the tree. Because that is what its pattern resembles.
[HM THAT U$ER WA$ RIGHT $O MANY PEOPLE ONLINE BUT $O LITTLE #HIT$, I'M GUE$$ING THEYRE JU$T LURKING PROBABLY #DA$HGHO$T$]
hey guys if i meet a celebrity and they immediately die shortly afterwards what does that mean exactly
> 𝙲𝚛𝚎𝚖𝚎 𝚋𝚛𝚞𝚕𝚎𝚎 𝚜𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚍𝚜 𝚢𝚞𝚖𝚖𝚢! > 𝙼𝚢 𝚌𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚝𝚘𝚛 𝚗𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚕𝚢 𝚜𝚎𝚝 𝚑𝚒𝚖𝚜𝚎𝚕𝚏 𝚘𝚗 𝚏𝚒𝚛𝚎 𝚝𝚛𝚢𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚘 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝! ^_^
Cas was ch-o-o-king -o-o-n a chip and instead -o-o-f asking literally any-o-o-ne f-o-o-r help he g-o-o-t up and st-o-o-icly walked -o-o-ut -o-o-f the r-o-o--o-o-m because he didn't want us t-o-o- w-o-o-rry.
goregle how to make quick money when i am not gettin paid fast enough by my job real no scam
I THINK I’VE WORKED MYSELF A LITTLE TOO HARD. I DON’T THINK FOURTEEN HOUR SHIFTS ARE ACTUALLY ANY FUCKING GOOD FOR ANYONE.
I haave finished counting the sugaar. THere aare 1 875 623 graains of sugaar in my paantry