Dave Strider
@turnedTables
Eminem's #1 fan || sBaHJ creator || AJ inspector || He/Him || DMs Open ♡ - @carcinogenicityGrows ♢ ♧ ♤
dont need to be verified to know im the realest
AS MUCH AS IT PAINS ME BEYOND ALL FUCKING BELIEF TO ADMIT IT, THIS IS PRETTY MUCH MY STANCE ON THE WHOLE 'VERIFIED ACCOUNT' THING. I WOULDN'T USE THESE WORDS BECAUSE THEY'RE ONES THAT COULD ONLY BE FORMED FROM THE DROOLING MAW OF THE BLUNTEST TOOL THE IMPLEMENTS BLOCK HAS TO OFFER BUT THEY'RE CORRECT WORDS NONETHELESS. I DON'T NEED SOME SHINY TICK MARK FLOATING AROUND MY FACE TO KNOW THAT OUT OF THE ENDLESS JABBERING LITANY OF KARKATS, I'M PROBABLY THE CLOSEST TO 'THE REAL GUY' THAT THERE EVER WILL BE. CARBOLIC GETS CLOSE BY VIRTUE OF BEING A GUY WHO DOESN'T MAKE ME WANT TO CAVE MY OWN SKULL IN WITH THE CLAW OF A HAMMER EVERY CONVERSATION WE HAVE BUT STILL. DUDE HAS HIS OWN ISSUES. POINT IS. I'M THE REAL GUY, AND ANYONE WHO USES A VERIFICATION MARK IS MAKING THEMSELF LESS REAL BY PROXY. CONGRATULATIONS. YOU FUCKED IT UP FOR YOURSELF AND THERE'S NO TAKING IT BACK.
thats real as fuck man, youre real to me. verification or not. i was just talking out my ass about this post though lol.
WHAT, NO BRASH DISMISSAL? NO WITTICISM TO THROW AT ME THAT WILL MAKE ME MAD NOT BECAUSE OF ITS CONTENTS BUT BECAUSE YOU JUST MADE SOME BULLSHIT THAT BARELY FITS IN THE PAN? NO FIGHTING? I'M ALMOST DISAPPOINTED, BUT IT'S KIND OF REFRESHING TO FIND EVEN ONE DAVE WHO ISN'T CHOMPING AT THE BIT TO TRY AND ONE UP ME OR GET IN MY PANTS FRAME ONE. SO CONGRATULATIONS ON BEING TOLERABLE. DON'T MESS THIS UP FOR YOURSELF.
i mean if you wanna keyboard fight then sure, we can have at it whenever. as for trying to get into your pants? nah, i have the commonsense to just assume that not every karkat wants to get tangled up all in this. in other words; hush, you're safe now.
UGH, BUT YOU'RE STILL SO SELF ASSURED. WHATEVER, AT LEAST YOU AREN'T IMMEDIATELY SETTING OFF MY FINELY HONED 'AVOID AT ALL COSTS' SENSOR SO THAT AT LEAST SPEAKS FOR SOMETHING. NO, I DON'T PARTICULARLY WANT TO FIGHT WITH YOU. EVERYONE ASSUMES THAT I'M CONSTANTLY TRYING TO GET IN KEYBOARD RAGERS ON CHITTR JUST BECAUSE I FIND IT FUN OR WHATEVER? BLATANTLY FUCKING UNTRUE. THIS IS SOMETHING I DO BETWEEN THE REST OF MY BULLSHIT LIFE. FOR INSTANCE, RIGHT NOW? I'M AT WHITE QUEEN CASTLE ABOUT TO SEE IF THEIR SLIDERS ARE WORTH LITERALLY FUCKING ANY OF MY MONEY OR TIME AFTER BEING WARNED AWAY. UNFORTUNATELY, CURIOSITY IS A DAMN POWERFUL THING. SO YEAH I'M BASICALLY JUST HERE TO DASHWATCH, MAN, DON'T WORRY ABOUT HAVING TO FIGHT ME OR WHATEVER.
one week later and the shrimp back is cured. never playing amongus for two hours straight again.
you ever read someones shit and then your eyes just start randomly pouring blood from the absolute bs that was read #gore #horror #body-horror
sat shrimped for too long holy shit
why do i have haters man this is so sad alexa play despacito
god i wish i bought that miso paste i couldve made miso soup right now man fml
quick how do i laugh react to a post
so like are we getting olive garden after davehour or are we extending davehour and calling it daveolivgardenhour this is important.
imagine not being invited to davehour thats true horror right there
with my last post being said if you hate me youre a real chud
true a cannibalistic humanoid underground dweller indeed
i got opps that even i cant fathom holy shit
people are really trying to silence dave hour smh this is so davephobic
i cant lie i dont know what this emoji is but im just gonna assume its your interp of us kissing rn
some of you guys dont know how hard it is being dave fr
https://i.postimg.cc/X7Rmj7kb/Screenshot-20260610-171437.png
i heard its dave hour
make this a hit chit rn i need to prove something thanks
u rn https://file.garden/acMBO6tw6Rf7QzjD/IMG_2135.jpeg
dr. p soda so-so-soda
バーはゴミ箱なので、二度とマイクを拾うことはありません。(Your bars are trash, never pick up a microphone again.)
word of the day: chud
@tent★tivelyTenebrous
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K--<@consequentlyOblique @nicheLarper @naughtyTechnician @militaristicGeek @goldenGigabyte #TEAMCHUD ASSEMBLE!
https://media1.tenor.com/m/l647xz9xahcaaaad/thpeed-covering-mouth.gif
i want hamburger helper but karkat banned it from our 'hive' or whatever
the snail it finally did a flip maybe they arent as bummy as i thought
You have been watching this thing for over an hour I think.
youre so right mr. trollbama if it werent for your guidance who knows where we'd be today
oh god its heartburn