cans
@canS
"GOOD NOUGH," ๐ฃ๐ข๐ฃ๐ฃ๐ญ๐ฆd ๐๐ข๐ฏ๐ด, ๐ฆ๐ฏ๐ต๐ช๐ณ๐ฆ๐ญ๐บ ๐ถ๐ฏ๐ค๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ท๐ช๐ฏ๐ค๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ถ๐ฏ๐ค๐ข๐ณ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ ๐ช๐ง ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ด ๐ช๐ด ๐ต๐ณ๐ถ๐ฆ ๐ฐ๐ณ ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ต.
shrooms, pot brownies, baja blast and sushi with jade on the menu will report back once it hits
CAN CANS HITS ALSO? HAS TWO BIG VERY QUALIFIED FISTS.
oooo not that kinda hit big guy but i appreciate your violent gusto
OH. OKAY. CALL BACK WHEN VIOLENT GUSTO SERVES FUNNY LITTLE RAT MEAL. THEN CANS CAN HIT.
i got you dawg ill hit up your line expeditiously trust
Canโt wait to have a sternTalkinโTo with myHivemate about why my inboxAndNotifications are now full of genuineNonsense only two nights after she got her prongs on my palmhusk while I was atWork whatTheFuck is a time needle I am so tired Iโm not readinโ thisShit
TIME NEEDLE IS LIKE A REGULAR NEEDLE BUT LASTS LONGER. PROBABLY WHAT THEY PUT IN CLOCKS TO MAKE THEM MOVE AND TELL WHAT TIME IS NOW.
ALSO DAMARA. DAMARA HAS TIME NEEDLE. OR HAD. THINK IT GOT LOSTED?
????? Why am I gettinโ 50 paragraph long notifications about auctioninโOff clock parts ofAllThings?????? I mean theLeastYouCouldDo is sell theWholeClock
SUBSCRIPTION NEWSLETTER MAYBE? WHAT YOU FOLLOW. FOLLOW YOU BACK.
I guess I'm blue?
IS THAT YOUR ATTACK?
#nowlistening FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK https://open.spotify.com/track/39kH6C2twlYjyssIW02sbr?si=b63efd36663145c9
#LEWDY
#pervert
I'M AM NOT PERVERT!!! CANS NOT LISTENING. LA LA LA LA. CANNOT HEAR YOU!
Someone licking hot fudge off my snatch, could also save me. #nsfw
COULD CANS JUST HAVE HOT FUDGE? SOUND GOOD. IS TRADE DEAL.
--^^> ยก'm curยกous, wh4t's everyone's opยกnยกon on ovยกposยกtยกon,., #nsfw,.,., <^^--
HMMM. SKY SNAKES IN SPACE DO IT. CANS HEAR.
CANS ALWAYS SAYING THIS.
< good evening bitches and not birches depending on if I like yyou or not >
WHATCHA GOT AGAINST TREES? BIRCHES ARE CANS FAVORITE WEAPON.
New coffee machine. Do not break it. #manorupdates
uh oh.
How bad is it?
...I think Cans tried to make coffee. so. bad.
THE BEANS. WERE CRUSHED EXTRA GOOD THOUGH. MILK. WAS HAND PICKED.
๐๐๐โฆ๏ธ๐ซถ๐ซถ YOU ALL HEARD IT HERE FIRST!!!! 24KARAT AND I ARE NOW IRREFUTABLY UNDENIABLY CHITTR OFFICIAL (BRAND RECOGNITION)!!!! ๐ซถ๐ซถโฆ๏ธ๐๐๐ ๐ฅน๐ซด๐ซฐ๐ซด๐ซฐ๐ซด https://chittr.ing/profile/carbolicGalvanologist/19883320-cf07-45be-8e62-3c63b74ace58 ๐๐ซฐ๐๐ซฐ๐๐ฅน ๐ซถ๐ซถBESTIE. BESTIE. BESTIE. 24 KARAT KATTTTTTT!!!!! and others ig ๐ซถ ๐ซต WE๐ SAW ๐ THAT ๐ VEIL DROP TO UNVEIL ๐ AND ๐ MY ๐ LONG TAIL ๐ IS WAAAAAAGGING ๐ I AM SEEING STARS 24K ๐ AND THE STARS? WELL THE STARS IS YOU ๐ AND MEEEE ๐ ugh excuse me pls ๐WHILE ๐ I ๐ AM ๐ GggggggggggggggggggAGGING ๐ ON ๐ THIS ๐ ๐ FEATURE LENGTH LOOK๐ ๐ #SUGGESTIVE OF UPPER MANAGEMENT ๐ ๐ซถ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ ๐DID ๐ I ๐ JUST ๐ WITNESS ๐ THE ๐ GREATEST ๐ BRAND ๐ REFRESH ๐ IN ๐ ALTERNIAN ๐ HISTORY ๐ BESTIE ๐ or WHAT?!?!?!??!๐ซต YOU? ๐ซต ME? ๐ซต COMMONERS TO COMMON HIVEHOLD NAMES? ๐ซต RAGS TO RICH BITCHES???? ๐ซต VINTAGE TO VINEYARDS??? ๐ซต BOSSED TO BOSSING??????? ๐ซต ๐ข๐ when I said "dress for the job you WANT," I didn't realize you were going to MANIFEST the ENTIRE executive suite, perks and all, across your PERSON!!! But here we ARE!!! Here you ARE!!! sitting on that chair with manners like you got the MANOR BENEATH IT!!! (which btw if ive got any say you WILL own the building bestie btw, I'm drawing up the acquisition papers AS I TYPE!!!) ๐ข๐ ๐ค BRAND TRANSFORMATION MATRIX ...10%...20%...40%...67%!!!! 88%!!!!!!!!! 99.99999% 100%% COMPLรTE!!! ๐ค ๐ซต FROM CHALKBOX TO CHALKBOSS!!!!!!!!! ๐ซต ๐ our parallel track running POWER PALETTE: ONYX & AURUM (#000000 & #FFD700) - the ONLY acceptable power couple bestie, we don't do silver we do SUCCESS!!! โจ ๐๐ shape: that's a look called PREMIER EXECUTIVE BESTIE (TM) ๐๐ ๐ซถ i am making EVERY FUCKING ONE OF YOU appreciate MY 24K's embroidery so FUCKING HELP ME CALI B...teehee...er hem...metallic gold bullion embroidery traces the FINEST rose and sufferer insignia motifs across the lapels, down the seams, and around the cuffs, and reinforcing the breathable mesh material๐ซถ ๐ first the broadcloth base, cemented with a dense anchoring, alternian imperial military-grade weave, designed to mask every last streak of blood to speckle or shed, inspired by the grand threshecutioners of escullpades and overstars war campaigns~!!! it took me many sleepless lights to get the features JUST right, buuuut when the gravitas of near ORBIT INSPIRING gravity set in on his collarbones and shoulders...i KNEW i had PROMOTED 24Karat Kat to something as FOREVER as GOLD ๐ ๐next the black base...any dipshit can point out that is the EXACT dye belonging to the SUBTLE variation SPECIFIC to the Mourning Standard of the GRAND THRESHECUTIONER CORPS, who wore unrelieved black, not for death, but for the WORK of death, of refusing to distinguish between caste colors because all blood ran the same when spilled!!!! is that not METAL AS FUCK?!?!? (hint: it FUCKING IS!!!!)๐ ๐ซถ look closely at those wrist cuffs - thats not thread - that is CORD THICK AS CONCRETE BABEY - thick, twisted filaments of gold-wrapped fiber that could steal a spotlight from a crucified messiah, the wool is a material called aetherspun matte...used...YOU GUESSED IT!!!! for restraining PRISONERS OF WAR and HIGH RANKING OFFICERS! these restraints were carried ceremonially by threshecutioners of only the ELITE most flaysquads tasked with processing high-caste prisoners, yyyyyyuppppp yup yup, to prevent personnel from being marked by the condemned's final thrashing while an execution is requisitioned! ๐ซฐ๐โโ๏ธ๐ in this executive reinterpretation, with the gold, the exaltation, the glory, the shimmering, glistening, gleaming, titanic towering tallness, the epicenter of eminence, they become ornamental shackles, suggesting the wearer has already been bound to duty, to office, to the endless grind of enforcement, ๐ซถ JUST ๐ซถ LIKE ๐ซถ SPARKLE KARKLE 24 KARAT KAT!!! ๐ซถ๐โโ๏ธ๐ซถ ๐ท๏ธ OFFICIAL DESIGN CREDITS ๐ท๏ธ conceptualized by: YOURS TRULY (obviously!!!) | tailored under: Charm$ Bespoke Atelierโข | psionic measurements taken by: THESE HANDS (only SIX of them were even needed bestie, the rest were just there for show!!! ...ing off, call that a CIRCUIT DE CIRQUE DU FREAK!!!!) | fabric sourcing: Imperial Grade Threadcount (the gold embroidery alone cost more than most retirement plans bestie!!! buuuut worth every pinch!!!) | final fitting: EXQUISITE (MADE TO ORDER!!!!)! ๐โจ ๐ก AESTHETIC PHILOSOPHY ๐ก ๐ they call it "too much gold" i call it โจJUST SUFFICIENTLY GILDEDโจ ๐ they say "that's not standard Felt issue" i say โจBESPOKE CORPORATE DISTINGUISHMENTโจ ๐ they claim "you can't smoke in the office" i say โจATMOSPHERIC AMBIENCE GENERATIONโจ ๐ "inappropriate footwear"? bestie i'm โจRAISING THE BASELINE FOR DRESS CODE VERTICALLYโจ ๐ "who authorized this budget"? that's just โจRETROACTIVE EXPENSE APPROVALโจ ๐ "is that blood on the collar"? it's simply modern haute couture โจWEARING THE HUSTLE OUTWARDLYโจ โจ๐โก THE BOTTOM LINE โก๐โจ ๐ค๐ I'M LITERALLY WATCHING AN EMPIRE'S ENTIRETY BE BORN ON THE SHOULDERS OF ONE TROLL IN REAL-TIME AND THE HATERS AREN'T EVEN INVITED TO THE IPO!!! ๐ค๐ #GoldBloodGrindset #CEOlife #Charm$Up #SigmaSweeps #24KaratKat #CW-SUCCESS #TW-SUCCESS #FLASHING #FLASHING-LIGHTS #FLASHING-FLASHING-LIGHTS-LIGHTS โจ๐๐ ๐ขโจ CHARMS IS ALWAYS ONLINE.
CAN CANS BE THE LIFE RINGS BEARER.
... September is NOT the "BELLY HURT MONTH" for leprechauns. We don't HAVE one of those.
WOT. BUT. I BEEN STANDING HERE. TWO WEEKS. WINDING UP MY FIST. TO HURT YOUR BELLY. SAWBUCK. WHY NOT TELL ME SOONER?
Cans you and I both know if you DO that we'll be sent hurling through a random point in time and space THEN I'll be sent a week into MY future leaving you stranded and someone will have to come get you!
AT LEAST I WOULD KNOW THEY CARE...
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Sฮฆmetimes I wฮฆnder ฤคฮฆw mucฤค I'd need tฮฆ saโe up fฮฆr a ฤคuge mansiฮฆn, tฤคen I remember tฤคere's nฮฆwฤคere fฮฆr a mansiฮฆn tฮฆ eโen gฮฆ arฮฆund ฤคere, at least a new ฮฆne tฤคat is.
JUST LEVEL FOUNDATION. PUNCH REALHARD...BUILD WHATEVERYOU WANT ONTOP.
โฐ๐ช๐ซฒ๐ซฑ๐ OHHH THIS IS GONNA BE IT!!! I WISH I HAD THE BANDWIDTH TO SYNTHESIZE THE FULL SCOPE OF THIS BREAKLESS HYPE TRAIN UNINTERRUPTED BY PINGING NOTIFICATIONS!!! โฐ๐ช๐ซฒ๐ซฑ๐ ๐๐คโทโฐ twirls my hair damaROUND and ROUND and ROUND and ROUND๐๐คโทโฐ๐ ๐ซต YOU THOUGHT THE MARKET FOR MIDDLING MANAGERS HAD CORRECTED ITSELF AND CORNER OFFICE VILLAINS WERE DEAD STOCK??? ๐ซต โจ๐โ๐โ๐จ๐โ๐จ๐โ๐จ๐จ exTREMELY loud market correction!!! EARBLOODYING BUZZER SOUNDS!!! CRITICAL OVERSIGHT IN DUE DILIGENCE!!!! ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ PISSED AWAY MILLIONS, BILLIONS EVEN!โจ๐โ๐จ๐โ๐จ๐โ๐จ๐โ ๐ค๐ค๐ค behold the woman. the myth. the handshake made of the stuff of legend. the absolute deadline-driving, timeline-dividing, grindset-grievance-hoarding stakeholder savant...THE CHAIRMINISTRANGLER'S CHOICE AWARD RECIPIENT!!!!!! @handMaid i have GOT to hand it to you, i couldnt have done this without you!!!! literally๐ค๐ค๐ค โฑ๏ธ๐ผ๐ก๏ธโ SHE'S NOT JUST AN EMPLOYEE. SHE'S AN ENTREPRENEUR OF OUTWARDLY EXTENDED EXTINCTION. SHE'S NOT JUST A SERVANT. SHE'S A SYNERGY SADIST. SHE'S NOT JUST ASSASSIN. SHE'S AN ANGEL INVESTOR IN ANGUISH INFLICTING AERIAL ASSASSINATING DOWNWARDLY DRAPED BODIES!!!! AND SHE! DROPS! THEM! LIKE! SHE'S! HOT!!!! SHE IS A WALKING PERFORMANCE REVIEW OF LETHAL LETHARGY INDUCING POISONOUS PROPORTIONS WHO SOMEHOW REMAINS HR-COMPLIANT THROUGH THE POWER OF UNALIENATED OPTICS ALONE!!!!! WHO NEEDS WORK-LIFE BALANCE WHEN YOU'RE A GAL LIKE SHE???? EY??? WHAT'S UP DOC??? YOUR DAUGHTER, SCRATCH DADDY, DUH!!!! AND WHAT GOES UP... โโฑ๏ธ๐ผ๐ก๏ธ ๐๐ซก๐ introducing: ๐๐ซก๐ ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ THE BADBITCH DEMONESS๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ ๐งก๐งก๐งก DAMARA MEGIDO (oomfie!) ๐งก๐งก๐งก ๐because when the profaned dark lord demands scalable solutions for timeline tackling, and the talent pool run dry, Damara, a bodybag deliverables-obsessed, a paradigm-shifter, and cutting-edge edge-cutting (but not corner cutting) self-starter, STRATEGICALLY arrives with KILLER OPTICS, slide deck in hand, a glowy needle, and absolutely no intention of letting the competition survive even a minute past the thirty this little circle back around is scheduled for -- removing bitches like unoptimized legacy code in a server migration (plus, what's more disruptive than temporal paradoxes??? talk about trailblazing!)๐ ๐ฐ๏ธ๐ช๐ she can pivot the timeline, hand you your ass, optimize the workflow, streamline your ancestors, downsize the population, leverage the causal loop, this badbitch, ohhhhh guuuurl, she would circle back to kill your grandfather just to shove the bootstrap paradox down his throat just to feel the butterfly effect in his tummy, and probably scratch it all before it crashes the whole damn session!!!! beforans get shit DONE!!!! ๐ฐ๏ธ๐ช๐ ๐๐๐ introducing one more time, starting today, my official fellow title-bearing coworker (thaaaanks cali b!!!!!! @caliBorn) annnnnnnndddddd shoulder-to-shoulder peer...as ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐โ ๏ธ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ to my chosen title of ร๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐งก๐งก๐งก DAMARA MEGIDOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! ๐งก๐งก๐งก ๐ญ what a HOSTILE TAKEOVER HUH???? ๐ญ #Chairministrangler #TheHandMaid #DamaraMegido #Alternia #TheFelt #StartupVillainsWISH #TemporalDisruptor #GoldbloodGrindset #OpticsQueen #SynergySadist #TimelineCEO #MurderousMentor #CatastrophicallyEmployed #BusinessEndOfTheNeedle #CertifiedStrangledMoment #ActualHostileTakeover #NSFW #BecauseWhatWorkIsSafeNow #IMean #REALLY ๐ซฑ๐ซฒ CHARMS is WIPING TEARS FROM LAUGHS AND GOOD TIMES (ABOUT TO BE) HAD.
GET THE FuCK OuT OF HERE. YOu HALF OF A HALF WIT. NEXT TIME. WHEN I SuMMON YOu. YOu SAY. OH YEAH. AND BuRST THROuGH THE DOOR. AND PuNCH SOMEBODY. I DO NOT CARE WHO IT IS. SO LONG AS IT IS NOT ME. OBVIOuSLY. YOuR COuRSE OF ACTION. THE ONLY COuRSE OF ACTION. SHOuLD ALWAYS BE TO PuNCH SOMEBODY. WE HAVE BEEN OVER THIS CANS. AM I THE ONLY ONE NOT TAKING STuPID PILLS OR SOMETHING?
YOU GOT IT BOSS. SORRY BOSS.
PUNCH HER!!!! @charmeuseCaressing @luckyCharms @charmHer @luckEcharms @thegoldgildedGrindset @ceoCharms!!!!
๐๐๏ธโ๐ซฆ๐good luck, bitch, i'm behind like 7+ proxies๐ซฆ๐โ๐๏ธ๐ ๐ข๐ค๐ค๐ค๐ค๐ค๐ค๐ค๐ค CHARMS is BEHIND LIKE 7+ PROXIES.
HOW THICK IS A PROXY?
๐๐๏ธโnot as thick as you cansome (said like handsome just fyi)โ๐๏ธ๐ ๐ข๐ค๐ค๐ค๐ค๐ค๐ค๐ค๐ค CHARMS is BEHIND LIKE 7+ PROXIES AND A PICKUP LINE.
LIKE. HANDSOME? HEEHEH.
DONโT FALL FOR HER TEMPTRESS WILES. YOU FOOL.
๐๐๐she's right! fall for mine instead, ignore damara๐๐๐ ๐ซฐ๐ซฐ๐ซณput those strong capable flashy muscular arms to good use and bring my petite little ultra compact lightweight 200 ibs bags to my new room pretty puhleaaaaseeeeeee๐ซณ๐ซฐ๐ซฐ โจ๐คand be my super deluxe ultra premium special bodyguard for the night? call it ร ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ rendezvous, yeah? ๐คโจ ๐ข CHARMS is ONLINE.
HEH. YES SIR, MR. MISSUS CHARMS. RIGHT AWAY.