chittr
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Seymor Coblof

@companyCacophony

CLOURTMO CO.™’S #1 DESK JOCKEY! 𓂃✍︎

Blood: BronzeAge: Kult Score: 791Kull Score: 90816 followers19 following

THE HORN ON THE SIDE OF MY HEAD MAY BE DISGUSTING AND ASYMMETRICAL, YES, BUT IT CAN ALSO BE PRACTICAL! I CAN HANG THE KEYRINGS OF ANY OF MY OFFICE COMPATRIOTS ON IT UNTIL THEY’RE READY TO USE THEM! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +20
Kull: +20
Total: 40
Ratio: 1.00
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Rainbow Drinker
The spectrum is this user's finest wine list.
Barely Survived
On Alternia... "Culled" is not always a permanent state.
pansexual
love yourself
FOR THE SAKE OF IT
Pure, simple, blood on the wall, knuckles to face, honest to fuck violence.
Knotty
This user appropriately tagged their NSFW. Nice.
Yaoi Official
This user officially supports Yaoi.
@anxiousTautology[AT]

>>| .are you not .afraid someone can steal them that way?

I GUARD THEM LIKE A FIERCE STRIPEBEAST! NOTHING IS GETTING PAST THESE KEEN BULBS! 𓂃✍︎

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Rainbow Drinker
The spectrum is this user's finest wine list.
Barely Survived
On Alternia... "Culled" is not always a permanent state.
pansexual
love yourself
FOR THE SAKE OF IT
Pure, simple, blood on the wall, knuckles to face, honest to fuck violence.
Knotty
This user appropriately tagged their NSFW. Nice.
Yaoi Official
This user officially supports Yaoi.
@anxiousTautology[AT]

>>| .alright. still, possibility .is .out there. .i wonder what happens .if highblood decides to steal them.

WELL IF A HIGHBLOOD WANTS THEM THEY PROBABLY NEED THEM FOR SOMETHING IMPORTANT! ANY HIGHBLOOD IN OR OUT OF MY OFFICESPACE IS MY SUPERIOR! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +5
Total: 5

FOR THE RECORD, I AM NOT AWAKE RIGHT NOW BECAUSE I CANNOT SLEEP! I AM AWAKE BECAUSE I AM DOING IMPORTANT BUSINESS THINGS! MUCH TO THINK ABOUT! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +12
Kull: +2
Total: 14
Ratio: 6.00

ONE OF MY COWORKERS HAS BEEN IN THE DISCIPLINE HOLE FOR THREE WORKNIGHTS NOW! I CAN ONLY IMAGINE WHAT HEINOUS, INCOMPETENT THING HE COULD’VE DONE TO GET HIMSELF BANISHED FOR THAT LONG! I HOPE HE LEARNS HIS LESSON! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +42
Kull: +22
Total: 64
Ratio: 1.91
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Verified
A user of established repute
@ardourCorvidae[AC]

Lik£, this might b£ lik£, an upgrad£ from th£ bad £mploy££ lik£, corn£r that I might lik£, us£! Lik£, LMAO!

YES, IT IS VERY EFFECTIVE! I’VE NEVER SEEN ANY ERRANT BEHAVIOR THAT A STINT IN THE HOLE COULD NOT FIX! I EVEN DUG MY OWN HOLE AT MY HIVE, SO I CAN STAY DILIGENT EVEN OFF THE CLOCK! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +10
Total: 10
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Verified
A user of established repute
@ardourCorvidae[AC]

Lik£, OMFG. Lik£, you ar£ lik£, so totally d£dicat£d? Lik£, OMFG.. Lik£ im impr£ss£d!! ;]

Kult: +5
Total: 5

THANK YOU! I’M HONORED! YES, I LOVE BEING EMPLOYED! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +5
Total: 5

HAVE YOU EVER SEEN A TROLL SO ROTTED IN THE PAN IT MAKES YOU SICK? THIS IS WHAT MY BULBS HAVE BEEN SUBJECT TO FOR THE LAST EXCRUCIATING TEN MINUTES! I AM GOING TO THINK ABOUT BETTER THINGS! SUCH AS A FRESH SLEEVE OF STAPLES! OR A BRAND NEW BALLPOINT PEN! MUCH BETTER! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +12
Total: 12

OKAY! THAT GUY’S OFF HIS ROCKER! THAT’S ENOUGH CHITTR FOR TOLIGHT! I AM GOING TO RETURN TO BEING GAINFULLY EMPLOYED! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +7
Total: 7

WOW HI CHITTR I CANNOT SLEEP SO I’M JUST GOING TO CHECK AND S HEY WHAT DO YOU MEAN THE BEETLES UNDER MY DERMIS! WHAT! IF THEY’RE GONNA LIVE THERE THEY BETTER BE PAYING RENT! #VAGUEPOST 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +37
Kull: +35
Total: 72
Ratio: 1.06
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Puppymoded
This user is literally a dog. A very good and wonderful dog.
@dutifulAssistant[DA]

ssccaarr yy, -- H. MERGAL, SECRETARY [ABG INC.]

I DON’T THINK THEY’RE ACTUALLY THERE! I THINK THE GUY SPEWING THAT NONSENSE IS JUST CERTIFIABLE! 𓂃✍︎

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Puppymoded
This user is literally a dog. A very good and wonderful dog.
@dutifulAssistant[DA]

ii ssttiillll ddoonntt , lliikkee tthhee vviissuuaall ,, eeuugghh, hh, iittcchhyy , -- H. MERGAL, SECRETARY [ABG INC.]

YOU SHOULD VISUALIZE SOMETHING ELSE INSTEAD! LIKE A NEATLY FILED QUARTERLY REPORT! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +5
Total: 5
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Puppymoded
This user is literally a dog. A very good and wonderful dog.
@dutifulAssistant[DA]

hhff, yyeess, tthhiiss iiss mmuucchh bbeetttteerr, , , ii wwiillll, aallssoo tthhiinnkk aabboouutt mmyy, mmeettiiccuulloouussllyy oorrggaanniizzee dd, nnootteess, ,, -- H. MERGAL, SECRETARY [ABG INC.]

YES! THIS IS THE WAY! BUSINESS-MINDED IS HOW IT OUGHT TO BE! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +5
Total: 5

WHY ARE WE ALL TALKING ABOUT TRAUMA? I DIDN’T KNOW THERE WAS A NIGHT FOR THIS! THAT COULD NEVER BE ME! MY EMPLOYERS PUT ME IN THE DISCIPLINE HOLE WHEN I MESSED UP AND I TURNED OUT FINE! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +9
Kull: +7
Total: 16
Ratio: 1.29

THE PRODUCTS CLOURTMO CO.™ MAKES ARE TOP NOTCH, I’M TELLING YOU! I REALLY WISH I COULD AFFORD THEM! I’VE BEEN SAVING UP! SEEING THOSE SHINY NEW HUSKTOPS IN THE DISPLAY WINDOW NEARLY HAS ME SALIVATING ALL OVER MY CUBICLE! ONE NIGHT IT WILL BE MINE! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +17
Total: 17

I FINISHED DIGGING MY PERSONAL DISCIPLINE HOLE! IT TOOK ALL LIGHT, AND NOW IT’S TIME FOR WORK! I’M SO TIRED, BUT IT’S NOTHING FIVE CUPS OF CAFFEINATED BROWN SLUDGE CAN’T FIX! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +7
Total: 7

I’M ALWAYS DROPPING NOTES INTO THE SUGGESTION BOX SAYING THAT THEY SHOULD INVEST IN MANUFACTURING SMART MICROWAVES, BUT SO FAR IT HASN’T STUCK! I’M NOT UPSET THOUGH! I’M JUST A LOWLY DESK JOCKEY! IT WOULD BE A PRIVILEGE FOR MY LITTLE SUGGESTION TO BE CONSIDERED BY THE TROLLS ON TOP! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +7
Kull: +5
Total: 12
Ratio: 1.40

I THINK I’M GOING TO DIG MY OWN PERSONAL DISCIPLINE HOLE OUTSIDE OF MY HIVE! FOR WHENEVER I MAKE MISTAKES OFF THE CLOCK! I HAVE TO HOLD MYSELF ACCOUNTABLE, AFTER ALL! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +27
Kull: +19
Total: 46
Ratio: 1.42
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YUCKY PENNY
This user is reviled beyond sins God ever envisioned.
Unraisinably Hated 100K
This Casper is so loathed it's two unraisinable.
Keykeeper
This user holds the keys to the Inbetween.
xx_LAWL_xD_xx
Chchow is your friend!
OZA-TAP Official
This user is committed to the OZA-TAP mission.
i llovee you ᨑ_ᨑ
ffriendd of ffourss
Jinxed!
this user has been entertained by one funny bunny!
@chillerAficionado[CA]

Man.

Kult: +5
Total: 5
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Puppymoded
This user is literally a dog. A very good and wonderful dog.
@dutifulAssistant[DA]

vveerryy ssmmaarr tt,, ttoo ddoo , -- H. MERGAL, SECRETARY [ABG INC.]

YES! IT’S COMING ALONG NICELY, TOO! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +5
Total: 5

MY COWORKER IS WHINING ABOUT “BOOHOO OUR SUPERIOR ASKED ME TO LICK HIS BOOTS!” OKAY? AND? START LICKING! LUCKY BASTARD! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +70
Kull: +50
Total: 120
Ratio: 1.40
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YUCKY PENNY
This user is reviled beyond sins God ever envisioned.
Unraisinably Hated 100K
This Casper is so loathed it's two unraisinable.
Keykeeper
This user holds the keys to the Inbetween.
xx_LAWL_xD_xx
Chchow is your friend!
OZA-TAP Official
This user is committed to the OZA-TAP mission.
i llovee you ᨑ_ᨑ
ffriendd of ffourss
Jinxed!
this user has been entertained by one funny bunny!
@chillerAficionado[CA]

Man

Kult: +7
Total: 7

More trolls need to be like you𝐿𝑒𝓍𝒾𝒶𝓃 𝐸𝓋𝒾𝒾𝓃𝓉

Kult: +5
Total: 5

They have you beat like a hound. I hope you get to feeling better.

I COULDN’T AGREE MORE, SIR! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +2
Total: 2

YEAH, ME TOO! MAYBE I’LL FEEL BETTER WHEN IT’S MY TURN TO DO THE LICKING! 𓂃✍︎

You're too cute to be a work chud 😔 </3

WORK CHUD? I LIKE THE SOUND OF THAT! DON’T KNOW WHAT IT MEANS, BUT IF IT’S WORK ANYTHING, IT HAS TO BE GOOD! 𓂃✍︎

Exa€tly the attitude I'm looking for, honestly.

Kult: +5
Total: 5

WELL THEN I HOPE ALL OF YOUR CURRENT AND FUTURE EMPLOYEES BRING THIS ENERGY TO THE PROVERBIAL TABLE! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +5
Total: 5

WERE I A LESS DIGNIFIED TROLL, I WOULD HAVE STARTED CHUGGING STRAIGHT FROM THE COMMUNAL CAFFEINATED BROWN SLUDGE POT AGES AGO! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +5
Total: 5

I DIP MY OBLONG MEAT PRODUCTS INTO MY CAFFEINATED BROWN SLUDGE FOR MAXIMUM EFFICIENCY! NOTHING LIKE A LITTLE FUEL TO START THE NIGHT! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +85
Kull: +80
Total: 165
Ratio: 1.06

CONSIDER·THIS· FECAL·=·FVNNY THERE·IT·IS·LITERALLY·THAT·SIMPLE·THIS·IS·SCHOOLFEEDING·LEVEL·SHIT

CONSIDER THAT YOU ARE WRONG AND COMEDY IS SUBJECTIVE! EXCEPT FOR YOUR COMEDY, WHICH SO FAR HAS PROVEN TO BE EXCEEDINGLY UNFUNNY! 𓂃✍︎

COMEDY·IS·COMPLETELY·OBIECTIVE·AND·IT·IS·MY·MOTHERFVCKING·BIRTHRIGHT·TO·DEEM·IT·SO· #OVNAGE·VPON·YE

DID YOU PERHAPS FALL ON YOUR HEAD AS A WRIGGLER? OR MAYBE IT WAS MORE RECENT? 𓂃✍︎

MY·HORNS·ARE·TOO·LARGE·THEY·VOVLD·HAVE·SOFTENED·THE·BLOV·VERE·SVCH·A·THING·TO·HAPPEN· I·SVPPOSE·YOV·CANNOT·RELATE·VITH·YOVR·SHRIMP·HORNS

OH I SEE! LARGE HORNS AND SMALL THOUGHTSPONGE AS OPPOSED TO SMALL HORNS AND LARGE THOUGHTSPONGE! 𓂃✍︎

ON·THE·CONTRARY·THEY·DO·NOT·CORRELATE

USUALLY I WOULD AGREE, BUT IN OUR CASES IT SEEMS THEY DO! 𓂃✍︎

THAT·IS·NOT·HOV·IT·FVCKING·VORKS·YOV·VACVOVS·SIENNA·CVNT

OH! WHAT’S THAT? I THINK I HEARD THE BUZZING OF SOME MISERABLE LITTLE FLY THAT I WILL NOW BE DISREGARDING! THIS HAS BEEN ONE OF THE TOP TEN MOST USELESS CONVERSATIONS I HAVE EVER HAD! 𓂃✍︎

Kull: +5
Total: 5

CLOURTMO CO.™ HAS THIS METHOD OF DISCIPLINE WHERE IF YOU’RE A FAILURE, THEY PUT YOU IN THE HOLE! COMPLETELY DARK, NOTHING AROUND, NOWHERE TO GO, AND THEY DROP SLOP INTO IT NOW AND THEN TO KEEP YOU FED! IT DOES WONDERS FOR PUTTING LACKLUSTER EMPLOYEES AND TWO-BIT SLACKERS BACK IN LINE! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +30
Kull: +20
Total: 50
Ratio: 1.50
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Puppymoded
This user is literally a dog. A very good and wonderful dog.
@dutifulAssistant[DA]

ssccaarryy, bb, bbuutt pprroobbaabbllyy, aa ggoooodd lleeaarrnniinngg eexxppeerriieenncc ee , -- H. MERGAL, SECRETARY [ABG INC.]

Kult: +5
Total: 5

INDEED IT IS! I ADMIT, I WAS PUT IN THE HOLE A FEW TIMES WHEN I WAS JUST STARTING OUT! EMBARRASSING, I KNOW! BUT I HAVEN’T MADE ANY BLUNDERS LIKE THOSE SINCE! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +5
Total: 5
Avatar
Puppymoded
This user is literally a dog. A very good and wonderful dog.
@dutifulAssistant[DA]

mmaayybbee,, iitt wwaass,, aa ggoooodd tthhiinngg mmaakkiinngg tthhee mmiissttaakkeess tthheenn,, aanndd lleeaarrnniinngg, ssoo yyuuoo ddoonntt mmaakkee tthheemm, nnooww, -- H. MERGAL, SECRETARY [ABG INC.]

Kult: +5
Total: 5

RIGHT YOU ARE! THE LESSON HAD TO BE LEARNED AT SOME POINT! I’M JUST GLAD THEY WERE ABLE TO WHIP ME INTO SHAPE! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +5
Total: 5

WOAH! BEEN SEEING A LOT OF #NSFW POSTING TONIGHT! BAH! WHY ARE YOU GRINDING ON EACH OTHER WHEN YOU COULD BE GRINDING OUT ANOTHER REPORT AT YOUR JOBS? 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +112
Kull: +80
Total: 192
Ratio: 1.40

REALLY? SOUNDS AWFUL! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +5
Total: 5

Maybe to you. Maybe I'll invite you over and see that it's not so bad

Kult: +5
Total: 5

SORRY, CAN’T! I’M TOO BUSY BEING EMPLOYED! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +5
Total: 5

Need yourself a weekend. My farm is my employment. I'm just my own boss. :)

DO YOU MEAN A WIPEEND? CAN’T, I’M EMPLOYED ON THOSE NIGHTS TOO! 𓂃✍︎

Of course, yes a wipeend. Just be careful pal, I'd hate to see a nice man like yourself get totally burnt out.

I COULD NEVER GET BURNT OUT! I’M JUST TOO GOOD! 𓂃✍︎

I'll hold you to that, partner.

I’LL HOLD MYSELF TO IT AS WELL! CAN’T BE CAUGHT SLACKING! AND ALSO IF I DO SLACK THEY PUT ME IN THE HOLE! 𓂃✍︎

IJ
Staff
Part of the Chittr team
Speech Impaired
This user has difficulty speaking.
nonbinary
love yourself
Vision Impaired
This user has difficulty seeing.
aromantic
love yourself
Disability Pride
Disability is not an ugly word. It's a way of life, and I'm proud of you today.
This is Junior.
Junior is an auto-badger. Junior is very good at auto-badging.
@imJunior[IJ]

Interesting.

I GIVE 110% FOR MY EMPLOYERS! IF MY SUPERIORS TELL ME TO JUMP, I ASK HOW HIGH! IF MY SUPERIORS TELL ME TO STAY AND WORK OVERLIGHT, I DO IT! IF THEY ASK ME TO BARK, I DROP TO ALL FOURS AND WAG MY PROVERBIAL TAIL! NOBODY IN THIS COMPANY DOES IT LIKE I DO! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +69
Kull: +50
Total: 119
Ratio: 1.38

This feꝈꝈa gets it! Keep ôn miniôn-ing paꝈ!

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Verified
A user of established repute
Bitch of Time
This user's mouth is known for engaging in: foul language, joints, and... pocky sticks!
Beforan Resident
The Beforan Buddyaucracy prides itself on those like this user.
Forever, in spring.
This user's avid appreciation for East Alternian / Beforan culture will never fade!
FOR THE SAKE OF IT
Pure, simple, blood on the wall, knuckles to face, honest to fuck violence.
bisexual
love yourself
@aienkanoAhegao[AA]

ブーツの革ってどんな味がするんだろう?

THAT’S A WEIRD WORD FOR WORKING! BUT I’LL DO IT ANYWAY! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +5
Total: 5
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Puppymoded
This user is literally a dog. A very good and wonderful dog.
@dutifulAssistant[DA]

ii wwoouulldd, rreecchhiitttt tthhiiss,, bbuutt ii ddoonntt wwaanntt ttoo ss tteeaall yyoouurr tthhuunnddeerr,, pplluuss, ii tthhiinnkk,,, ii aamm nnoott aass ggoooodd aass yyoouu aatt,, mmoosstt tthhiinngg ss,,, ii tthhiinnkk ddeessppiittee mmyy eeffffoorrtt,, mmyy oouuttppuutt iiss cclloosseerr ttoo,,, 60%,, , -- H. MERGAL, SECRETARY [ABG INC.]

Kult: +4
Total: 4

I HOPE I GET TO FIND OUT SOMEDAY! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +2
Total: 2

HEY, CHIN UP! THERE’S ALWAYS ROOM FOR IMPROVEMENT! AND RECHIT AWAY! THERE’S NO THUNDER TO BE STOLEN! JUST A COUPLE OF DILIGENT WORKERS! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +5
Total: 5
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Puppymoded
This user is literally a dog. A very good and wonderful dog.
@dutifulAssistant[DA]

ookkaayy , -- H. MERGAL, SECRETARY [ABG INC.]

As it should be Keep up the good work -𝐿𝑒𝓍𝒾𝒶𝓃 𝐸𝓋𝒾𝒾𝓃𝓉

Kult: +5
Total: 5

THANK YOU SIR! I WILL SIR! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +7
Total: 7

I HAVE AT LEAST THREE CUPS OF CAFFEINATED BROWN SLUDGE IN ME AT ALL TIMES! IT IS HOW I STAY ON TOP OF MY TASKS! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +12
Kull: +10
Total: 22
Ratio: 1.20
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xx_LAWL_xD_xx
Chchow is your friend!
Pitch One
This user vacillates pitch black.
Damascus Decorated
Verified and valuable friend of Mike!
In This Business...
...you're not afraid to get your hands dirty for a little Caeger.
@damascusDoctorate[DD]

HAVE YOU TRIED CONDENSING ALL THREE CUPS INTO ONE PARTICULARLY POWER-PACKING SINGULAR CUP FOR GREATER EFFICIENCY?

NO! MY CUP IS SADLY NOT LARGE ENOUGH! IT WOULD SLOSH AND SPILL ALL OVER AND I WOULD BE A MISERABLE ONE-CUP CHUMP! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +2
Total: 2

HAHA! WOW! SO MANY KEEN BUSINESSTROLLS HERE! IT HAS ME QUIVERING IN MY COMPANY-MANDATED BUTTON-UP! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +65
Kull: +55
Total: 120
Ratio: 1.18

[AH HA, I LIKE YOU.]

Kult: +5
Total: 5

WELL SIR I’M GLAD TO HEAR IT AND IN FACT SIR I COULD JUMP FOR JOY! BUT I WON’T, BECAUSE THAT WOULD DISRUPT THE WORKFLOW! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +10
Total: 10
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Luxury Class Chittrer
This user doesn't just own the finer things in life. This user is them.
OZA-TAP Official
This user is committed to the OZA-TAP mission.
xx_LAWL_xD_xx
Chchow is your friend!
friend of PASCAL!
This user is part of the hive.
Believer of Whimsy
Your crops are watered, your vibes are pure, and you're friends with Florid.
@resplendentCandour[RC]

◌ Glad to hear it! ⧂

Kult: +5
Total: 5
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YUCKY PENNY
This user is reviled beyond sins God ever envisioned.
Unraisinably Hated 100K
This Casper is so loathed it's two unraisinable.
Keykeeper
This user holds the keys to the Inbetween.
xx_LAWL_xD_xx
Chchow is your friend!
OZA-TAP Official
This user is committed to the OZA-TAP mission.
i llovee you ᨑ_ᨑ
ffriendd of ffourss
Jinxed!
this user has been entertained by one funny bunny!
@chillerAficionado[CA]

Man.

Kult: +5
Total: 5

GLAD TO BE HERE SIR! 𓂃✍︎

HOW CLEVER! YOU’VE WORKED YOUR NAME INTO YOUR CAREERPATH! 𓂃✍︎

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Puppymoded
This user is literally a dog. A very good and wonderful dog.
@dutifulAssistant[DA]

iitt iiss ggoooodd,, ttoo bbee aammoonngg,,,, ttrroollllss ooff aa ffaammiilliiaarr, sseennssiibbiilliittyy,,, aass ttoo tthhoossee,,, iinn tthhee ABG INC. ooffffiiccee , -- H. MERGAL, SECRETARY [ABG INC.]

Kult: +5
Total: 5

YES, AND LIKEWISE BUT WITH CLOURTMO CO.™! SO MANY DILIGENT AND SAVVY WORKERS HERE! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +5
Total: 5

[AH RIGHT, NOW THAT'$ THE #ORPORATE $PIRIT YOUR MANAGER$ AND BO$$E$ WANT FROM YOU.]

Kult: +5
Total: 5

AND I’M HAPPY TO GIVE IT! 𓂃✍︎

ANY FELLOW BUSINESS-MINDED TROLLS HERE? SOUND OFF! HUZZAH! 𓂃✍︎

Kult: +15
Kull: +10
Total: 25
Ratio: 1.50

One day I hope to be back on my trading vessel. On a personal quest at the moment.

QUEST AWAY! YOUR BUSINESS VENTURES AWAIT YOU! 𓂃✍︎