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John Egbert

@ectoBiologist

just your regular old john egbert! pronouns are he/him. yes my hair is long; i've just been too lazy to get it cut lately.

Blood: IndigoAge: Kult Score: 483Kull Score: 56530 followers58 following
PINNED CHITT

oh right i guess i should make an intro post or something! hi everyone! it's me, john egbert! the egg-meister, as some people call me. if you don't know who i am, that's fine! i'm really trying not to let celebrity go to my head.

((new profile pic, thank you so much to @tenebrousGuardian!!!))

Kult: +10
Kull: +5
Total: 15
Ratio: 2.00

[[im so glad you like it 😁😁😁

if i met an alternate of myself in person, i would ideally not have any reason to fight him! i hope we'd get along. wouldn't kiss him though, because, i'm not into guys so neither would he!

Kult: +10
Kull: +5
Total: 15
Ratio: 2.00

this is oddly specific

one of these days i've really got to get my hair cut back to my old length. i don't know how girls stand having their hair this long. and jade's is way longer!!

Kult: +35
Kull: +40
Total: 75
Ratio: 0.88

What's the rush? Why not grow it out a little longer (with regular trims of course to eliminate split ends) and donate it so some poor child can have a real hair wig? Really quite selfish of you to cut it already when you have only just begun to grow it out.

no! don't you dare! it looks TOO good like this for you to mangle up!!! #trustme

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@arachnidiansGrasp[AG]

Have you considered leaving it long? It looks cute that way.

oh, shit, well, if jasprose sprite, my alt-future-son, and vriska all think i should wear it long, who am i to argue? :p

Kult: +5
Total: 5
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@arachnidiansGrasp[AG]

Exactly.

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@tipsyGnostalgic[TG]

DONT

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@tipsyGnostalgic[TG]

i meann ahaha noooo dont it looks so good :3

sometimes i wonder about casey. she's a fully-grown salamander by now, so she ought to be able to speak, but she never does. should i be taking her to some kind of salamander psychologist about it? or does she just prefer to communicate through glubs and hand motions?

i wonder what it means that my alternate future son is blonde...

Kult: +10
Kull: +5
Total: 15
Ratio: 2.00

>AcK< piss-haired Fu+ure Baby

one time at a sleepover, rose painted my nails. it was really fun! sometimes i think about trying it myself, but it just feels...i dunno, weird?

Kult: +35
Kull: +30
Total: 65
Ratio: 1.17

nail polish is cool i keep my talons painted up these days

painting ur naiIs is great tho!!!! heIps protet them from getting damaged as quikIy trust :o)

well i'm not exactly out here breaking nails on the regular, but i'll keep that in mind!

come on, don't be like that! i paint my nails on the time! you should let me do yours sometimes! y'know. ... if you wanna.

holy shit are you my son from the future?? wait. no, probably an alternate timeline. either way, gosh, nice to meet you! i'd love for you to paint my nails if we can ever figure out the interdimensional logistics!

Kult: +5
Total: 5

haha, yeah. something like that! honestly, i can't be asked to figure out the scifi mumbo jumbo involved, but the second we figure that out... you're so on!

casey's taking a midday nap and i think she's got the right idea! see you all later!

Kult: +5
Total: 5

important update from casey: "uhoirrrgvrkir"

Kult: +37
Kull: +15
Total: 52
Ratio: 2.47

Interesting. What else.

Kult: +5
Total: 5

let's see! "jklghjl;hdskhjldsfkjsdfsdfoudasfkjbsdgfakjdsfsfd"

Kult: +5
Total: 5

Writes that down

Kult: +2
Total: 2

#nowplaying https://open.spotify.com/track/3gaqddcv0nwmhqi5rfmxoi i was never huge on evanescence but after hearing this piece in devil may cry i am lowkey obsessed.

oh right i guess i should make an intro post or something! hi everyone! it's me, john egbert! the egg-meister, as some people call me. if you don't know who i am, that's fine! i'm really trying not to let celebrity go to my head.

Kult: +75
Kull: +65
Total: 140
Ratio: 1.15
@nannaEgbert[NE]

just so long as you don't show anyone the ones where i'm totally naked, i will accept this humiliation without complaint.

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@nannaEgbert[NE]

Even the one with the vomit? That's the most hilarious one!

are you sure its not becaus o somethin else

egg.

@nannaEgbert[NE]

i hate to say it, but it is objectively funny. you can show them that one.

Kult: +5
Total: 5

what else would it be?

bert.

Kult: +5
Total: 5

dont worry about it

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@transcendGodhood[TG]

the egg mister the egg mixer the egg master the egg mingler the egg masher

Kult: +5
Total: 5

all of these things and more!